FLASHBACK TO 1 HOUR AGO:

MIRA'S POV:

I came back a few minutes ago, and honestly, that was one hell of a journey back to my home. I've never felt that way before. So painful and confusing at the same time. What I did is the right thing. I guess. I mean it mutually benefits both of us. It was an arrangement ship from the beginning, but then, I agree everything started changing, but I guess that is because I was too swayed by his charms.

But right now, one of us has to think maturely. With, the proposal coming in front and his exams, I think separation is a good idea.

I was sitting in my room thinking all about him. Thinking about what happened today. I felt pain in my chest every time I remembered his face. It was bruised but when I told him those things, his eyes showed how actually hurt he was. I have never seen him like that before. I cursed myself thinking, how typically I broke him. I reacted the way I should never have.

I really feel selfish at this time, but I don't have any option now. It's done. I've hurt him. To the extent that now, he'll hate me. Forever. Maybe this is for the betterment. I know it hurts me to the hell, even thinking of him hating me, not having him around and not touching him and kissing him like he's the one I've been waiting for. But it is for the best.

Right?

Maybe. I mean... it must be... It has to be.

I know I have said things I didn't mean. It was just my temper. And I was scared of losing everything that I've created so far. At this point, I don't think I was worried about the position more than I was worried about losing my tainted soul once again. He was always more than just a reckless affair for me and always will be. But I also do not know where this is going. I think I am in...

DING DONG

I huffed in frustration thinking about who it might be at this time. It was almost 7 in the evening and it was raining outside. The rains are not supposed to come before mid-April, but this year it was early. I guess this situation needs to be made more gloomy than usual. However, there was one per cent hope that Nina would show up, even though I know she won't. I messed up. A big time, and maybe I deserve this. All of this.

The pain and punishment.

Nonetheless, the debate I'm having in mind, I pulled myself up from the couch and walked towards the door. As I opened the door a bit hesitant and frown face, I was shocked to see

"Mr. Han?" I gasp.

What is he doing here? How did he know where do I stay? And why even is he here?

"Hi I am sorry to disturb you at this moment, but I was here, nearby due to some work and my car broke down." He said with a cheeky smile, which is normally unusual of him. I have met him before, but I have never seen him smiling like that. Well maybe some professional small twitching smirk, that its. But this... this is a whole smile he has there. I wonder why?

"I knew you stay around here somewhere... So, I just thought I'd say hi and maybe... ask for a place to stay for a while... Hope you don't mind." He completed politely.

Why didn't you find any hotels?

But I couldn't voice my frustration. It isn't polite and definitely not with Mr. Han. He is our biggest investor and I don't want to ruin my work, due to some personal issues.

"Um sure...Please, come in." I let him in with a forced smile. No matter how much I try to show I am okay, deep down I was not. It was killing me.

"Wow... you have a nice place" He complimented as he walked inside looking around.

"Thanks. Would you like some tea or coffee?" I asked courteously. I cannot just let my guests go without offering anything, just because I am mentally unstable right now.

"Coffee would be fine," he replied slowly.

I sighed. I was tired of the fighting in my head. It was too much. But I have to let it go. Get yourself together Mira. You have a guest. And not just some random guest, Mr. Han. Breathe, smile and be professional.

Even though I can't get Alex, off my mind.

I walked to the kitchen and started making coffee. But I was still lost in the thoughts of Alex. His defeated face, his bruised eyes, chapped lips and blood on the corner of it. It broke my heart, to see him like that. I wanted to hug him, console him, kiss him and take care of him that time, but my anger made everything so much worse and now I can't stop thinking about that.

"The house is beautiful just like you Miss Mira." His voice broke through my clouded thoughts. As I turned around, he is already standing opposite the kitchen table.

"Thanks" I muttered. But feel lonely. Again.

Right now, all the compliments feel like nothing to me. They are just words. They are nothing compared to Alex's compliments. He made me feel butterflies and, and something...

"You seem lost somewhere... is anything bothering you, Miss Mira? Can I help?" He asked acknowledging my current state. Shit. This is the last thing I want. Mr. Han to get involved in my personal space.

I know he is not what people say he is. Instead, he is friendly and I am really lucky to handle this account for him. But I guess I will never be able to speak y heart out with him, or anyone else, as I use to with...

Come on, Stop it, Mira. You have to let him go. It is over now.

This is what you are. You set those rules for the same reason. To not get involved emotionally. You did the right thing. This has to end at some point in time. So, why get bothered about something which was meant to be? Either today or tomorrow you had to let him go. No one stays forever.

No one.

"Ummm..." I am not sure if I should tell him about what is going on. I can't. "No, it is nothing for you to worry about, Mr. Han." I forced a smile. "Here..." I extended the cup of coffee I made for him, but he didn't touch it. Instead, his eyes were darting at me, as if he is trying to read my soul.

Fuck, this never ends well. You know that. Stop him when you have time.

"Uh..." I forced another awkward smile, while I walked out of the kitchen towards the living room. "So... you said you were here for some work... Is it over? I mean..."

"Yeah, it is over. Actually, I came here for a little trip with my daughter. But then she ends up sleeping in the middle of our trip and I had to send him back, as I remembered that you live somewhere near, thought to drop a 'Hi' maybe..."

What? He is not here for actual work, and instead, he thought to say hi to me. Why?

Maybe he needs to talk about the progress...

"Uhm... The project is absolutely fine, we had a tie-up with a few companies for the hiring and honestly, when they heard that we are associated with the R'Cher Group, they didn't waste any time, sending out the invitation to come to the campus drive." I said pursing my lips. He really is a big businessman after all. People knew them by his name. And when NYU was known to be associated with the R'Cher group, it really made it into the biggest MNCs.

Not that NYU was an unknown, but we still try for the best of the best for our students. "Thanks to you, our students could get more opportunities now. They look happy" I finished with a genuine smile this time.

A beat passed when he replied thinning his lips and arching a brow, "but... you don't seem happy at all. I guess I came in a bad time maybe?"

He got on that track once again. I don't know if I should or should not tell him, but I also need some advice too. Maybe, I will not say it directly, maybe I can try something indirectly. I would have asked Nina but she won't talk to me. I tried a few times calling her on my way back, but it all bounced to voice mail.

I will have to talk to her soon.

"I am sure I can keep up with your thoughts. No matter how cloudy that is." Mr. Han pushed once again. And this time, I really wanted to let it out. To breathe.

Maybe I should...

"Uhm... there is a friend of mine who doesn't believe in love... anymore." I started. Maybe this is the first time after Nina, I am telling something like this. I can't ignore the fact; he made me really comfortable as a friend. And without Nina around, maybe I could use another friend-ly advice.

My lips dried as I started to speak. It has been always the most difficult part of my life. To speak out about what was going on in my mind. "She...Uhm... had a different lifestyle. But then she met a guy who was a forbidden one, she knew she shouldn't have let him in, but she kinda already did. But she didn't regret it as he was everything that she could ask for." I gulped in nervousness. I am really doing this. Telling my biggest secret. Mixing up my personal life, with the professional one.

"He gave her warmth and comfort that made her bend her rules. She got addicted to him. She is confused about how that guy can just break every rule she kept in her life and for some reason, she got angry with herself for that. Everything started going oddly smooth. It was unnatural, she should have guessed the threats, but she was too much lost." I look up at him, who is attentively listening to me.

And now, because of their secret affairs, they came very close to some threats. Threats that can destroy both of their lives. Now she is confused and scared. She is scared of what it will do to them. They had this... sort of arrangement-ship contract, to keep everything under control. But she lost it... She lost every control that comes to him" I said. Something started to sting my eyes and I know tears aren't very far from falling down.

"She knows that they are forbidden romances and she did something terrible. Maybe that is what she thought was right. But she hurts him. Now they are over. She ends it, yet she cannot forget him..." I looked up. I pushed back the tears because there is no way I would want him to know that this is my story. I just need a suggestion. I don't want him to get involved.

"What do you think she should do?" I finally asked.

By that time, I realized I just confessed my whole story in front of my client... who is now, of course sitting here as a friend. But that doesn't change a thing. I saw he was intensely looking at me. His brows crunched up together, jaw tight and his eyes... they are sad and worried for some reason.

"Why wouldn't she believe in love?" He finally asked, breaking the ice.

I sighed in relief. Thank God, I didn't send anyone shocked with my pathetic story. But now I have to answer his question. Which I didn't really want to do. But unfortunately, I have to

I gulp and reply in a low whisper, "It broke her."

He chuckled softly and then replied, "Well, love cannot break or heal. It is just a feeling. What we choose to see is up to us. It was always about people. It takes two people for a relationship to work. And it takes equally two people to ruin it. And as far as love is concerned, love is beautiful. It can never ruin anyone or anything. Rather, it was the people, who play with it and blame it on love afterwards."

I didn't know what to say now. He was partially right. But that doesn't mean it didn't affect me. It did break me. In the past.

He sighed and continued, "You see Mira, love is only a feeling. A beautiful one. It was the scar left behind by that person who made us this way... If you want to forget that incident but you hang on to their pain and the past, then you have not understood the meaning of love. Love is more about you than the other person. It is, how it makes you feel. Happy."

"But...." I tried to speak but nothing came out of my mouth right now. I just don't know what to say.

He was right, I was happy. I felt all those feelings that I never knew existed in me. Thrills, jealousy, happiness, worry and... love. And it was Alex... who made me feel all that.

In the past, I thought love, broke me, but it was not love. It was a person. Him. Who broke me into so many pieces, that I would never be able to assemble them in this lifetime. Now, I couldn't control my tears and they came out like a waterfall.

He stared at me for some time deeply and then took a deep sigh before saying, "Looks like you are the girl in the story."

I looked up at him in shock. "No... I..."

He chuckled lazily before saying again "You are in love, Mira. And you need to accept that."

My eyes widened when he said that.

"What? That is not me... it was my..."

"I am pretty sure this little friend of yours has very similarities with you. Because your eyes tell the truth of the story you just told me."

I stared at him blankly.

He smiled at me and said, "You know not everyone can get their love. And I think you should chase for it if you got a chance."

"But what if I am too broken to believe in love again?" I asked being a hopeless person.

He scooped a little toward me and I felt a bit uncomfortable. He kept his hands on my shoulder bending a little to my level. Regardless of how magnificent he looks now, my mind brought back memories of Alex.

"Mira, love cannot be controlled. It will come when it has to. There is always a second chance, and I can assure you that second chances are more beautiful than the first ones. And not everyone is lucky enough to cherish it." His hands brushed over my cheeks and I felt an electric shock. It was not out of lust... or attraction. Something different. Something warm. "Trust me I am telling you from my experience." He said while looking into my eyes. There is something about him that made me realize how broke he looks right now. But I have no idea why. "You need to let go of those little insecurities in your mind. Give it a chance, to whoever that lucky guy is. Your happiness is more important than anyone's judgements."

I can almost feel how sorrowful he was feeling right now. I feel bad for him. Maybe as a friend, I should ask him his story, but I have no strength left. Maybe one day.

But is he saying the truth? Should I give myself a second chance? What if, he is right, and all this time I was wrong?

DING DONG.

I frowned, wondering who it might be. I have no energy left in me today.

END OF FLASHBACK

It was almost midnight. The rain stopped. Mr. Han, called a doctor when I passed out. She said it was just stress. He left a few minutes ago as he got a call from his daughter. She was alone. She needs him, more than I do. As I lay on my bed, it felt awfully empty and cold. I closed my eyes as I let the tears roll off. I was once again standing in the same place where I was once 4 years ago.

FLASHBACK 4 YEARS AGO:

I walked around the road of Delhi in a state of shattered and raptured in the early morning in my wedding dress. My face was bruised up from the torture last night. Scratches all over my body and... fresh fire burn skin. It doesn't hurt me anymore. Because I am already dead inside. Blood clotted on the corner of my lips. The lehenga was torn from place to place. I didn't have time to put on my shoes when I ran away, so I was walking barefoot. The red lehenga that I bought with so much happiness was the cause of my destruction. Everything seemed to be tainted, black, white or grey.

I was torn apart by someone that I trusted most. Someone I thought loved me, the same way I do. Someone who promised to love and cherish me to the very end. Someone I thought would protect me. But he didn't. He did nothing as he promised. Instead, he did something so awful to my soul, that maybe I would never be able to look at myself the way I use to.

I was in that state where tears refused to come out of my eyes instead, it was bleeding inside my heart. My tears had dried up long ago when I was screaming for help and nobody answered my prayers. I walked like a crazy woman who had lost everything. The fact is that I did.

What am I supposed to do now? I wanted to die. Maybe partially out of shame for what they did to me, and partially because I thought there is no meaning left to live like this. But there was a small voice in my head, that stopped me. It said that living with my mom dad and my family, because of some monster, would bring no good to me or my family.

Instead, they would win.

But what am I supposed to do now?

Somehow, I reached home and rang the bell. There was still decoration around the house. They were still there, the lights that once adorned the last night. The flower garland was still there which was beautifully decorated yesterday evening with our names. I could still smell the scented candles that were lit last night. Everything was the same as before.

Everything, however, was different today.

I couldn't tell what was different that caused this vast change between yesterday and today. Was it my innocence? Or my foolishness to believe in that monster again?

He played with me. Not only with my feeling but also with my body and soul. He destroyed who I was.

It was awfully silent everywhere. Just the screams of my voice and their laughs rang in my head. Those ugly faces, those dirty hands, those laughs and insults....

Someone opened the door and it was my sister-in-law, Juhi. She was immediately shocked to see my state and called my mom, without wasting any second. She sensed something was wrong. It was. Everything was.

"Mom... Rajeev... Come down, Mira is here"

As her attention returned to me, she immediately pulled me inside the house. "Mira? What happened to you? Why are you here in this way?"

She began to ask questions that I couldn't answer at all. In a state of semi-consciousness, I just sat on the chair. Like a statue. Like a corpse without a soul. Well, they killed it last night. I do not know who I am anymore. What were my morals, and what was my dignity? Everything was shattered in just one night.

"Mira?" My mother gasped to see me in this vulnerable state.

"Mira? What happened?" My dad came after.

"What the hell happened to you, Mimi?" my brother's voice rang in my ears.

I looked at them as being so pathetic and broken.

"Everything was a lie!" I finally spoke, "You failed dad... you failed." Finally, tears ran down my cheeks and I could taste the salt of my soul. "This time, you were wrong. I was wrong... I couldn't control anything. I was so wrong."

"Tell me what's wrong Mimi," My brother asked skeptically and worriedly while sitting on my level.

"They... They killed the Mira, you know. I am not her. I am tainted. With those filthy hands on me... My body...." I cried more, breaking down completely. "They are after me now... he will kill me." I looked up at my father, who was standing there as broken as I am.

He couldn't believe his judgements were wrong. Maybe experience does fail to see the truth too.

"He raped me..." I couldn't stop my tears from falling like a waterfall. "He tainted me... and not only him, but there were also Aditya..." As soon as his name fell from my lips, everyone's eyes widen in shock. They heard that name after a long time. He was someone who was associated with our family for a long time and was sent to jail, for his crimes.

I have never imagined; Nana would be a part of Aditya's plan. They not only raped me brutally but also destroyed my soul, with their dark desires. I was not a woman, who left her parent's house with her husband for a new life anymore.

I was that girl, who was tortured, used, broken and tainted.

"I want to go to New York," I said finally looking up at them with tears and the last ray of hope in my eyes. "Please. I want to live..."

END OF FLASHBACK

Since then, I have never given up on my control over things. I became Valeria out of my vulnerable state. Once I was pure, but that night changed everything when Nana and Aditya not only destroyed my body for their pleasure but also got into a part of my head where I need to push them down, gaining control over them.

They showed me that this is the body, that made me suffer. Because it belongs to me, and it is their toy now. So, I became Valeria, where I could keep in the control. It makes me feel in power and satisfy to see a man kneeling down to me. To listen to every of my command. To see them hurt and be at my mercy. All of these reminded me, how broken I was, and how seeing them in pain, and disappointment would make me happy.

My soul was tainted black by my husband and Aditya, but it also makes me the person I am today. Independent, powerful and in control

But once again everything seems to slip away from my hands. Just like it did 4 years ago. I was awake again. Hurt again. And this time, nobody did that to me. It was me, who did this to myself,

The night went sleepless as I spent the night worrying and thinking about Mr. Han's words, Nina's anger and Alex's defeated face. It began to haunt me.

******

Once again, mornings were filled with worry, and everything returned to grey. Life without colour.

What was he to me? Why did I ever give him access to breaking all the rules of my life that I set? Why was I feeling this when he was finally going away? This is what I want right? To end things right here?

Then why the hell does it hurt so much? Why do I feel abandoned again?

As the days began to pass, there were a few times when I encountered Nina in school, but nothing seemed like what it was like before. The eyes which were friendly and filled with concern and mischief were now filled with hurt and anger. I tried to talk with her several times, but every time she'd ignore me. It has been two months now.

Bellamy was taken under medical help for her unstable mental health. I heard how she turned that aggressive after her parent's separation. That little girl went through a lot when I mercilessly tried to ignore her, out of some personal issues. I am happy now that she is in safe hands.

And Mike dropped out for some reason. I heard from Mrs. Collins what actually happened that day and I cursed myself for not trusting Alex. He didn't do it. He didn't spill my name. It was Mike who found his diary and that's how it all happened.

However, the diary was now with me. I mean to our department. It was to be given back to its owner when he returns. Nicarno acted a little differently, but Andrew didn't say much.

I also heard how Nina resolved the issue when I was at home, crying my ass off. She managed to keep it simple by saying, that it was a violation of privacy, to read a diary like that. Whatever the affairs are, it was outside the school and it shouldn't affect the inside.

I need to thank her personally. I know, she is just mad. She'd be okay soon.

I wonder how she managed to keep everything calm. Guess she is growing up. I am happy to see her progress and take up the responsibility.

From what I saw at the start of this year, everything has completely changed in these six months. Me, Nina, NYU, Alex... nothing is the same as they are.

However, I haven't seen Alex in these two months. I tried asking a few students. Professionally to keep a tab on my students and that is when I got to know, he isn't coming to school after that day.

Everything between us changed as well. Me and Alex. We no longer have the ability to express the affection we have for each other. There were times when we wouldn't keep our hands off each other. Me breaking all my rules for him. And now, there is no contact between us. In these six months, my world turned upside down once again and I was still standing foolishly in the same place. Hopeless and clueless about life.

Despite telling myself that I would keep a distance from him, I couldn't seem to keep up with my promises. I started missing him terribly.

I was having OCD once again. The nights began to be filled with tears and loneliness and I wondered what exactly I felt about him.

AFTER A FEW WEEKS.

"I can't wait to come back and tell you everything about this trip. Hope you are doing well too. And don't keep spending your days in just having sex with your mystery man. Go out, have dates and fall in love too. Oh, how much I am missing you. Love you, bestie. See you soon" I was watching an old video message from Nina, when she went on a trip to Hawaii, just before all these happened.

I saw how delightfully happy; she was with David. I miss her smile. I miss her.

I sat on my couch looking at a few old pictures I clicked with Alex back when we were together. They were beautiful. His eyes looking at me, like I am his whole world and I am smiling at him like I am in love...

I smiled to see how silly he made me feel around him. I loved how comfortable I was with him. Every time he touched me, there was magic in the air. The beauty of those eyes drowned me in them. How sinful yet magically perfect those lips made me feel like a woman.

I remember Nina saying, "When he is the one, you will know. There will be moments when you realize that no matter what time you spend with him, it's enough. Enough to realize that your heart has already chosen the one for you. When you start missing that person even if it's been a short span of time when he looks at your eyes and you feel he is your world, your home, that's how you know."

That is when it clicked in my mind after several weeks of debate and denial with myself, he was my home. He was my anchor.

Now did I realize how important he was to me! Because no matter what rules I set for myself all these years, only he was able to break them. Only him. He was more than just my obsession or lust.

After spending almost two and a half months away from him, I came to realize how utterly and deeply I was in love with him.

I love him and I want him back.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sometimes, we choose to see only what we want, and we can't see the truth.

It is hard to hold on to all the people who have broken your heart. But trust me, love is amazing. Love is not at fault. It is the person that broke you. Give love a second chance when it comes. Unless you want to be late like Mira.

She fell in love with Alex before she could understand. All she did all this time was denial. Only if she had given Alex a chance might they have ended up together.

I love you guys. I really cried in this last chapter.

But this is not the end. This is just the start of another book. I will surely be back with "A Twisted Love-Manoeuvre" Soon. Till then love you all. Thank you so much for supporting this book.