THE PROSPECT of going back to work made me giddy with excitement. I was getting tired of sitting around doing nothing. I had tried to work from home on my current project but I didn't get really far with it, it needed the office setting and some tools from my workstation.

When Wednesday came, I was overtly exited. I beamed and gushed all through the ride to work while Kelvin was at my side trying to be cheerful. My happiness didn't rub off on him but I didn't mind that. As we got to the office car park, Kelvin asked me if I was emotionally ready for work. I'd heard from him that Gwyneth was back from the trip to Abuja and I was indifferent. I'd made peace with what happened during a meeting with my therapist, I saw the experience from a whole new perspective; a better and less bitter one. I assured him that I was ready.

Dwayne was excited to see me resume to work when I went to the security post to say hi to him. He told me about how he always asked after me from Kelvin. I gave him a noisy peck and thanked him for the cards and flowers I received while in the hospital. Everyone seemed to be genuinely happy that I was back at work, and my boss took some projects off my hands to give me the chance to settle in. I protested that it wouldn't be necessary but he insisted.

For the first time in years of working for the firm, I went to the cafeteria for lunch. I joined Kelvin at a table with some of his colleagues from Accounting. The cafeteria was on a different floor from the main office and it had an open space filled with rectangular and round tables paired with chairs surrounding them. I opened my brown paper bag and munched on an apple after saying hi to everyone around the table.

"This is Fatimah, you guys should know her, she works at the I.T. department. Fatimah meet my colleagues, William, Richard, Remi, Seye and Iyke." Kelvin pointed while saying their names as he introduced me to the group, half of whom I knew and saw at the coffee room occasionally. They stopped eating their lunch and looked at me.

"It's nice to meet you guys," I said.

"Nice to meet you too," they chorused.

"You're pretty, I mean very pretty," The fair, chubby girl that was introduced as Seye said.

"Thank you. You're pretty too," I replied graciously. The energy I got from them seemed genuine and I relaxed visibly.

"How was it like being away from all the stress constantly going on around here?" Richard asked. He was a nice looking guy with a somewhat tamed afro and I tried not to blush when our eyes met.

"If it was under the right circumstance I would have enjoyed the break, but it wasn't."

"Yea, crazy right?" he asked without really waiting for an answer. He took out his phone and got distracted.

Kelvin was biting into a piece of sandwich and he looked at me with his eyebrows raised, silently asking if I was okay being around them. I nodded and he resumed eating leaving me to mix with his colleagues. There wasn't much mixing going on as almost everyone was on their phones. I chewed my apple and silently watched them.

By the time lunch was over, I was left alone with Kelvin while the rest went to their offices.

"Aren't they cool?" Kelvin asked.

"They are. I'm surprised, they seemed really nice."

"They are. I could tell they liked you."

"You could?"

"It was obvious. Are you doing okay? You've been away for a while so things could be a bit different."

"There's no change, actually. I'm taking things easy though."

"As you should."

Kelvin left and I followed suit, taking my half eaten lunch with me. I sat in my cubicle and concentrated on the drawing on my computer screen.

I would normally go home after closing hour but since picking up a healthy lifestyle, I decided to check out the gym Kelvin talked about. I took the stairs to the gym, it was on the second floor of a shopping complex near the office. I could do some Yoga and aerobics there and my therapist was aware of this. I introduced myself to the front desk officer outside the gym and I was shown the gym. I entered through the door and saw several work out machines, it was empty except for one person who was running on the treadmill.

I saw a woman who looked to be between the ages of thirty to thirty-five walk up to me. She introduced herself as the gym instructor, she looked lean and fit in her workout clothes. We shook hands briefly, her grip strong and firm.

"I'm Marjorie," she said.

"I'm Fatimah," I replied.

"Oh, yes. I got an email from your therapist."

"My friend must have passed your email address to her," I explained.

"I suppose so. We're going to start at the intermediary stage since you have an eating disorder." She gestured as she talked. "I don't want you to take on too much at first. Also, I'm going to warn you not to use the scale, I don't want you obsessing about your weight loss." I nodded and she continued, "You're likely to lose about 5kg in two weeks, that's if you do everything right i.e. exercise plus healthy eating habit."

I nodded again as she spoke, I folded my arms and cocked my head towards her direction, listening to every word that passed from her lips.

"Right now, we're going to document your body measurement then compare it with new ones the farther we go into our journey."

She got a notepad and a pen from the desk near where the cycling machines were planted. She got a measuring tape also after asking me to spread my legs and lift my hands. Measurements of my shoulder, neck, bust, hips, thigh, butt and arms were taken.

"Okay," she said, standing to her full length. "We're done for today, you'll show up four times a week for a certain period of time then we'll add an extra day for swimming. You can decide by yourself what days will be convenient for you."

"After work, I guess. Say between five thirty to six, Monday to Friday."

"That's okay by me. You need to get a pair of comfortable training shoes, yoga pants, some tanks and your personal water bottle. Everything else you need will be available here at the gym."

"I have those available." Those were one of the things I made sure I got at the mall during my sick leave.

"Great, then we can start when you're ready. I'll be in close contact with your therapist, filling her in on your progress."

"Okay."

"We're done here then. Here is my complementary card. " She handed me her card and I looked at it, noting her e-mail address and phone number. "You can send me a text few hours before coming to the gym."

"Looking forward to working with you," I said.

She gave me a quick hug and went about folding the measuring tape. I made my exit and drove home. I showed up at the gym the following day after closing from the office. Kelvin said he was staying back to finish what he was working on and I agreed to pick him up after finishing my session. I hurried to the changing room and changed out of my office clothes into the appropriate gym wear. Marjorie was waiting for me and I walked in briskly to join her at the center of the room where a trampoline was laid out.

"Firstly," Marjorie started after looking at the watch on her wrist. "We're going to start our session by looking at the mirror. Communicate with yourself. Look at your body, see yourself through a positive outlook." I moved to the mirrors hanged on the walls and did as I was told.

I looked at myself thoroughly for the first time in forever and noted my double chin, flabby arms and wide hips supporting very heavy thighs. There were subtle differences from before I landed in the hospital. I used to have no visible neck but now I could see an obvious inch holding my head. I took a deep breath and opened my mind. My face looked pretty, at least prettier than I ever thought and that made me smile.

Marjorie seemed satisfied by my reaction and we moved on to warm ups which consisted of me trying to get my body to hold my weight without falling on my face. I went through several motions and managed to finish fifteen reps of squats. Things got pretty heated in the next phase, I skipped for ten minutes and tried not to die. I couldn't breathe properly from exhaustion and my heart was threatening to shatter into tiny pieces. Marjorie took pity on me after I finished another set of squats and we rounded things up with some cool offs.

I thanked her and disappeared from the gym after getting my things from the locker room. I spent about thirty minutes just sitting in the car trying to get myself back to normal right after guzzling one liter of water. The air conditioner was on full blast and I welcomed the chill. I had gotten myself back to some semblance of normalcy by the time I picked Kelvin from the office.

"Dude, you stink," he said.

"Thank you. I couldn't take a shower at the gym, I just wanted to get out of that place fast. The drill was killing. Can you drive?"

"Of course," Kelvin replied with a silly laugh.

"Aren't you meant to be sympathizing with me? Are you even my friend?"

That earned another round of laughter from him and I shook my head in feigned despair. "Chill. It's just funny, I can't help it. You look like you were involved in a hurricane."

"Shut up." I took a hairband from my bag and tidied my hair after seeing my reflection in the mirror. I looked terrible.

"I think some vegan pizza will change your mood."

"Don't you dare. I want none of that crap, I'll stick to salad. It's bad enough that I'm using skimmed milk for my meals. I can't stand any healthy version of my beloved pizza right now."

"I can't say I share your sentiment, but we'll do it your way."

We found an eatery on our way home and Kelvin parked in the public car park. We walked in and I quickly sat, I ordered chicken salad and Kelvin ordered the same out of respect for me. He wasn't obligated to eat healthy, but he didn't want to order anything that'd lead me into temptation. I forgave him for his early insensitivity, he'd earned it.

"I need to get new clothes, my old clothes don't fit anymore," I said before our food arrived.

"I personally think you should get few clothes but buy the cheap ones. If you keep losing weight, you'll have to get new sets and if you buy too many now, you'll end up discarding them too soon."

I took a straw from its holder and chewed on it. "That makes sense or I could just go on with my old clothes and do a total haul when I reach my weight goal."

"That'll work too. It's more economical anyway."

"I think that's what I'll do."

"Great."

Our plates arrived and I dropped the chewed up straw beside the cup of chilled water. I dragged my plate closer and dug in. "How is your girlfriend, what's her name again?" I said in between bites.

"Alex."

"I still find it hard to believe you have a girlfriend."

Kelvin stopped eating and replied, "Yea, it just happened. I was lonely, in a new town with a new job and no friends, I was also avoiding you at that time and she just happened to be there. It wasn't planned, we met and things just kind of developed."

"Then it's safe to say you both are in love."

He took a forkful of salad and chewed. "I guess. I love her and I'm sure the feeling is mutual."

"It came as a surprise to me, but now I understand." I truthfully didn't understand his point, but I didn't want to be a bitch again so I ate my salad.

"Alex wants to really meet you. She's been asking me to invite you over for dinner and come to think of it you've never been in my house. Now is your chance, when do you think you'll be free?"

Never, I thought but instead said, "Weekend, say Saturday."

"You mean this Saturday?"

"Yea." I relaxed into the maroon sofa when I finished my food.

Kelvin was still eating. "I hope it's not going to overwhelm you?"

"Not at all."

"Saturday it is then."

"I can't wait."

I hoped he didn't notice the fear in my voice, I was terrified for so many reason. I would finally come in contact with the girl he was with and see what his taste looked like. I would get to see the girl that wasn't me. As if I didn't have enough to worry about, I also have to worry about his girlfriend seeing through my bullshit. One look at my face and she might be able to read that I was also in love with Kelvin. This was going to be a disaster. I should have known that nothing good could come from agreeing to see his girlfriend.

"I'm quite certain you'll get along well."

"For sure. Is she still interested in moving in with me?" Say no, I prayed.

"No, she's quite content with living with me and it's also good for the relationship. Having her in the house every day is so thrilling."

"I can imagine."

Which girl in her right mind wouldn't want to share a house with him not to talk of a bed? I mused. We left the eatery after Kelvin finished his meal. We didn't bother to linger for more minutes, I had a bed to get home to and he had a girlfriend to get home to.

"Thanks, see ya." Kelvin pecked me and jumped out of the car as we got to his house.

I made my way home solemnly, biting hard on my lips as I drove home.