Porta Daven strode over and smacked his hands away from the man-handled mimis. "Leave those poor things alone. Have you no decency?"

She handed him a handkerchief. He held it dubiously at one corner, staring at it as if it was going to bite him

"It's clean you idiot. Wipe yourself, you look fairly disgusting."

She circled him slowly as he pulled himself together and rose on unsteady feet to face her, head hanging in mortification. Honestly, the first person he had seen since leaving Cloud Recesses, and it had to be Porta Daven. The horror from the Demon Realm. The guest thrust upon him a year ago by his nephews that, almost, singlehandedly disrupted the ages-long peace and quiet there. The gods were showing him no mercy, that was a fact as eternally carved into stone as all of the Rules she had instantaneously shattered on the spot when she arrived at their enclave. His head began to ache.

At least she had shed that cursed beard. That thing had been absolutely unnerving. The way she argued constantly with it, yammering incessantly until you thought your eardrums were going to explode, had been unendurable. He watched from the side of his eyes as she prowled around him several times. Finally he spoke.

"What...what are you doing here? You just...go away. I am fine alone here."

"Fine?" She snorted. "When I walked up you were screaming at the top of your lungs and trying to rip your steamed buns right off your chest. That does not register as 'fine' on any scale, Lan Qiren."

"They aren't mine!"

"They sure look like they intend to stay put, so you better get used to the girls, Sect Master. Tell me, did Lady Lan go all the way and turn the bull into a steer? Or did she just grace you with an impressive pair of udders?"

He reached down and shielded his untouched and embarrassed manhood.

Port broke out into peals of laughter. "Gods in Heaven! It is safe with me. I get what action I need in Gusu and Yunmeng. I am not looking to hassle a forty-year-old virgin, no matter how great his need to be deflowered is. And you need that pretty, damned badly. Stoppering up that fella down there is not a healthy thing for body OR mind, you know."

He blushed a deep, beet-red. She chuckled and turned her back on him She walked behind a tree and reached behind it, hauling out two large bags, stuffed full, hoisted them over each strong shoulder and strode to the cabin, kicked the door open, and set them inside.

He shouted, "Hey! WAIT! This is my place. "

"I know. And it is truly a lovely abode. But it sure as hell could use a woman's touch. I brought stuff from my place."

"You...you...you can't stay here."

"I can, and I will. Not hiking back to Gusu this late at night. Besides...I brought two hammocks. Pretty sure this floor has been rough on your ancient old back, especially after carrying that extra poundage for the last few weeks. Not exactly comfortable are they, Buddy?"

"I'm not that much older than you, Daven!"

"Yeah? How old do you think I am?"

He studied her closely and had no idea. Her face was smooth, with handsome features and large, bright green eyes, a generous mouth, and a strong chin. She was his height and muscular, but not bulky. A figure that could turn heads if dressed like a lady. But Porta was no lady. Without the beard, she was pretty, but he could not guess her age.

"I have no idea but if your foul mouth is any indication, you must be 4-5 years older than me."

She snorted again. "Wrong. I am 35 years old. My vocabulary is ageless, that's all."

She strung the hammocks out and placed two blankets in hers. He watched carefully and lined his own with his own quilts from home. Or what had been his home. Then Porta pulled two large pots out of the first bag as well.

"There's a stream down below. Fill them up so we can make a meal." He started to object, and she arched one eyebrow. "Go on. Now."

He left, grumbling under his breath.

" What was that, Lan Qiren?"

"Nothing."

"Hmmm. That's what I thought."

He stomped off. She had vegetables chopped when he got back, a small chicken had been disassembled and ready for a stew. He blanched at the sight of it. For the first time, she felt a bit sorry for him.

"Hey, if you are living hand to mouth, Lan Qiren, you eat what is available. It all becomes a gift from the gods. I brought this because it is a bland bird, and will help you adjust, in small amounts, to eating meat."

"Why did you come here?"

She looked at him gravely. "I am somewhat of a mercenary. I look for adventure and I find ways to benefit from the bounty I find. In other words, I seek opportunities and am not shy when they offer themselves. When I heard about the hilarity in Cloud Recesses and that you were planning on leaving, I thought, 'Porta. Here is an opportunity. This guy is gonna have a hard time. You can help and you can profit from it."

She leaned in towards him. "I am a direct and ruthless person, Lan Qiren and you need my help. It is a rough life outside your walls and rules. You have little experience of the world and how to handle it. There are grifters, thieves, and vagabonds ready to steal you blind and hurt you. In your condition, you could be enslaved by some and held in market sideshows. Used and abused in ways you never dreamed of. I can guide you through that and I will expect to be paid handsomely once we find a cure and send you back. What do you think?"

She spat on her hand and held it out, waiting patiently

He spat on his and clasped her hand.

"I believe the last month has driven me a bit mad. But you have a deal Porta Daven. We will work together. I don't like you one single bit, but I am a man of my word/ You help me, and you will never need another mercenary job in your life. I am the goose that laid your golden egg, Daven. And once this is over, I never want to see your face again."

"Deal!"