JUNE TWENTY-FIFTH. That was a day I'd remember for the rest of my life. It was the day the last of the JCM exams finished, though mine had finished almost a week prior, and everyone was feeling giddy. But that wasn't the only thing, because that very night, the school had planned out a party/formal dinner, just for us Upper Fifth kids.

There was none of the rigidness in rules from last time. This time we were allowed to go crazy. Most of the full boarders gathered together on one table near the end of the cafeteria, with past grievances ignored and forgotten for the night.

"I'm so fucking glad we made it," Damian grinned before stuffing a large bite of pasta in his mouth. "I'm just so glad."

"It's like I just got released from jail," Nicole gushed, and everyone laughed as we let that sink in, as we let the fact that we were finally all free sink in. We were all sixteen now, basically. We were two years away from becoming adults, two years away from graduating from Bridewater College and going to university and starting a whole different life.

No, actually, even next year was a completely different change. Sixth form was not Fifth Form, the freedom we'd get was not comparable to anything else. Next year was going to be great, since we basically had no exams and nothing to worry about throughout the whole thing.

I was really looking forward to it.

There was adrenaline pumping through my veins, and everything seemed to be in a fever-hazed rush around me as we all laughed and giggled and gossiped through the dinner, ranting about exams and gushing over how glad we were that it was all over.

Yunji was smiling through the whole thing, which was a rare occurrence for her around this particular bunch. She'd never enjoyed spending time with most of the other full boarders, since a majority of them were from Hong Kong. When we all started speaking Cantonese in a group, she could only stare and try to catch a word or two. I was one of the only ones among them who spoke fluent Mandarin, so I'd more often than not end up having to try and translate to her throughout the conversation.

We could speak English, but some words and phrases simply didn't deliver the same message when spoken in a different language. Nothing we could do about it. Some linguistic gaps just couldn't be crossed, even if both sides had a mutual language they spoke fluently. Some things could be easily expressed in one language and not another, and no one was willing to let go of their fun just so Yunji could understand everything we said.

"Diu," Kwanfong laughed, "these few months got me living like a man on death row. I can finally have some fun this summer."

"Don't go too crazy," Theo scolded. "Your mum's going to whoop your sorry ass."

"Do I look like I care?"

"You will when your mum picks up the baton."

Kwanfong's eyes narrowed. "Don't you dare threaten me."

"I'm not threatening you," Theo said mildly, "I'm just reminding you of what your mother would do."

"You're threatening me."

"I'm helping you, you absolute dumbass."

"You're really not."

The two were left to their own bickering soon after that, and the conversation turned to gossip. "I saw James Withington talking to Adelina earlier in the week," Nicole revealed, glancing around to make sure no one else was eavesdropping. "He looked absolutely heartbroken. What happened?"

I winced. The question was clearly aimed for me, who, among all of us, was the closest to Adelina. I hadn't interfered in the situation after that initial night Adelina had come to me, but I'd heard snippets from her since. She'd talked to James about it like I'd suggested she did, and while he'd been understanding, he clearly hadn't let the matter rest.

What happened after that could only be described as the greatest clusterfuck of problems that had ever occurred, as James tried to convince Adelina that they did have a chance, and Adelina was adamant about it not happening. And they'd let it rest after the exams happened, and Adelina had silently prayed to me that it meant James was finally over it, only for their final conversation to occur last week.

It was in the quad, which I found ironic. Last year, the quad had been the place of many a confrontation between the two, and now it was also where Adelina made things clear once and for all. She didn't like James. She had never liked James, and she would never like James. She saw him too much as a brother figure, albeit one she'd always disliked, to ever develop romantic feelings for him. It wasn't happening, and he had to let that sink in. She had no interest in continuing this on with him until the end of time.

Adelina had been shedding tears when she'd related all of this to me, as I patted her shoulders in an attempt to calm her down. However cool she may have been when she said those words to James, it did hurt her. It must have felt like her entire life was a lie, and her guilt was clear to anyone with eyes.

But it wasn't her fault. It hadn't been her fault at all. And neither was it James'. Both of them were victims in this unfortunate situation.

And I was just watching another friendship—if it could be described as that—melt into nothing, transform and crumble into ashes.

It was tragic. There was no other way to put it, honestly. It was a tragedy, but sometimes there was just nothing you could do about it.

But I couldn't tell that to everyone here. It was their privacy. So instead, I just said, "They don't precisely get along right now."

Nicole rolled her eyes and scoffed. "When have they ever gotten along?"

"Yeah, but the reasoning has changed," I said, one brow raised. If James or Adelina had revealed anything to them, they'd know what I was talking about. Anyone else would just think that they'd found a new reason to hate each other, which was kind of accurate. That sort of was what happened, though the reasoning probably wasn't what they had expected.

Nicole, clearly sensing that I didn't want to reveal anything else, hummed and turned away. Some people around the table looked interested, but no one felt the need to press me. Especially not since Adelina was just barely two tables away.

"I'm already regretting my subject choices," Louisa sighed, shaking her head. "Remind me why I decided to continue taking Human Sciences."

Damian snickered. "Because you're Asian. It's the Asian subject, we're all taking it. Except Honoria Song, apparently."

I stuck my tongue out. "I'm not a science-y kind of girl, unfortunately. Theo isn't taking Human Sciences either. Or Audrey."

Audrey raised one brow. "I'd rather die."

"Relatable."

Theo tilted his head. "I almost considered it. But I think Maths is just more useful in the long term than Science. I'm not going to get into a career that needs science anyways."

"The other subject that correlates with your future career is Artefacts," Sebastian said wryly. "You're not only taking that, are you?"

"Yeah, but that's different," Theo said with a roll of his eyes. "I actually enjoy those other subjects. Science? Not so much."

To that, Kwanfong just scoffed and shook his head. "Failures."

"Coming from you, that's rich," I instinctively shot back.

"Oh, and what have I failed at?"

I raised my chin. "You're not even in set one Maths, my guy. You're arguably one of the biggest Asian failures in this school right now."

Kwanfong's eyes narrowed. "I'm not in set one by choice. I purposefully lowered my grades so that—"

"Yeah," Theo interrupted with a laugh, "no one buys that bullshit, Kwanfong. Just admit it, you suck at Maths. There's no way around it."

"Traitor," Kwanfong hissed, glaring at Theo.

The other boy simply smirked in return. "Can't be a traitor if I was never on your side in the first place."

The girls at the table exchanged an exasperated glance. We were all used to this, with all honesty. The banter between the boys, as they'd christened it long ago. Their messing around, their stupid jokes and things that no one else could quite understand except them. The full boarding male community was very exclusive, and I wasn't necessarily sure that was a bad thing. Certainly, the fewer people who join them, the better.

Though their membership was already heavily limited in the first place, for obvious reasons.

The food for tonight was better than last time's formal dinner, that was for sure. It was steak, and while it was far too thin and chewy, it was actually edible. If you smothered it with sauce. I could at least close my eyes and imagine we were in a high-class steak restaurant rather than the school cafeteria of Bridewater College.

It didn't really work, but it helped just a tiny little bit.

None of us were leaving for another sixth form college, which was fairly nice, though it meant a few less new bloods. But there would still be new students next year, that was for sure. Plenty of them, actually. I'd assume at least three or four new full boarding girls joined my house alone next year, since Lower Sixth was a major entry point year, which I was quite excited for. It did get a bit lonely around house sometimes, no matter what I liked to think, and it would be enjoyable to have a few new friends I could start on a clean slate with.

That, and I was sixteen. If I did meet the guy...

I wouldn't mind dating. I wouldn't mind dating at all, if I really did come across the right guy. Though the chances of that happening was highly debatable.

Either way, it was the end of an era and the start of a new beginning, once the summer ended and September started. I knew that much.

The people at this table sitting with me, I'd hated and I'd loved and I'd enjoyed being alongside them, throughout different times in these two years. It had been bittersweet and exciting, and I was forever grateful my parents had sent me here rather than have me remain in Hong Kong. Certainly, half the things I'd seen here, I'd never have imagined happening back at my old school. The education was better, the students were nice (for the most part), and the teachers were mostly excellent. And despite all the drama, most of it had been fun to witness. Most of it had been fun to watch as shit went down again and again, and even the few times I was embroiled in scandal myself became hilarious once the pain had washed away.

It was embarrassing, the way I'd reacted to some of it. But at the same time it was also just funny, looking back.

While the last formal dinner had been awkward, this one was far more fun. Everyone was getting along for just one night, it seemed, even though we all knew that the tension would most likely return the moment we left.

Or perhaps it wouldn't.

We were all growing up, after all.

We weren't the same people we weren't two years ago, when I first stepped foot into this school. We'd all grown up a little, changed a little, and became a better person. That was growth. That was turning from fourteen to fifteen to sixteen, and then seventeen and eighteen before this chapter of our life closed and we moved onto our next.

It felt strange, that so much time had already passed. It still felt like yesterday when I first came.

But I'm just being repetitive now.

The situation was: some of the students had planned some shows for the night. One of the girls sang so beautifully I felt tears growing in my eyes, two of my day friends performed a dance that sent everyone on their feet, a few of the day boys gave their attempt at stand-up comedy that left all of us cackling on our stomach, not because of how good they were but simply how abysmal. Nadia went on to perform ballet, though the stage was far too small for her to properly perform, she was still absolutely stunning. Yunji gave a violin solo, clearly enjoying the applause given to her as she finished and swept into a bow.

Everyone was letting their hair down tonight, even the teachers. Even the strictest of them were smiling, relaxed, leaned back in their seats as they watched us. Some of us would be leaving—I knew three of the girls in my house were going to another school for sixth form, and I doubted I'd really stay in contact with them, since we'd never been that close in the first place. But that was okay. It wasn't anyone's loss.

This was, most likely, the last time all of us would be gathered here like this forever.

And we'd remember every moment of it.

—

SOMETIME DOWN THE night, the dinner had dissolved into a party, and the tables were moved out of the way as the students began dancing and laughing in the middle of the cafeteria. And soon enough, Theo and I were the only people left sitting. Me, because I'd just managed to procure a doughnut and didn't trust anyone here enough to just leave it on my plate while I went dancing; Theo, because he apparently couldn't be assed.

That was when he turned to me.

"Want to get out and get some fresh air with me?" he asked, to my eternal surprise. "It's getting stuffy in here."

In response, I just raised my doughnut.

He released a sigh. "You can bring your bloody donut with you, Song. Jesus Christ."

"Fine, then." I got on my feet. "Let's not be outside too long, though."

"Had no intention of that."

The June air was already starting to get hot. Despite the fact that my dress was sleeveless, I felt no chill, but instead a bit hot, even. The doughnut was sticky in my hands, and I wrinkled my nose as I tried to finish it more quickly. I hadn't brought any tissue paper out with me, so I'd be stuck with the sugar until we went back inside.

The quad wasn't empty. A few of the other years loitered around, stealing a quick, curious glance at us before turning away. There wasn't much interesting to see, just two Upper Fifths in formal wear, one with a doughnut in hand.

He led me to one of the benches, and I didn't want to be standing anyways, so I sat down beside him, leaning back. "Goddamn, huh?"

"Time's passed by fast."

"Really fast."

"A bit too fast?"

Theo shook his head. "I think it's gone just right." He turned to stare at me, and I chose to ignore him as I continued eating my doughnut. When I'd finished it, I linked my fingers to get the frosting off it.

"Gross," he muttered.

"Fuck off," I glowered, turning my head to glare back at him.

He let out a grunt before turning away.

"Why'd you bring me out here?" I asked lazily, letting my hand drop onto the rest of the bench. "Doesn't seem like you dragged me out just for fresh air, you know."

"I felt like it."

"Oh, great. Come out by yourself, then, why bring me alone?"

"I wanted to."

"I'm not your fucking servant."

"You agreed to, of your own free will," he pointed out, glancing sideways at me. "I didn't force you."

I flexed my jaw. "I was bored."

"You could have gone dancing."

"I was eating my doughnut," I protested.

"You could have stayed there until you finished your doughnut," he reminded me. "But you didn't."

"Well, it seemed sad to let you loiter out here alone."

"And thus you agreed to come out with me." He let out a breath. "And the conversation is over, easy as that."

"Fuck off."

"I don't think I will."

I hadn't expected him to either, if I had to be honest, so the answer didn't surprise me at all. Instead, I remained in my position, though I turned my head to meet his stare.

He looked away first. "What are your goals for Sixth Form?"

I gave a nonchalant shrug. "Get into my dream university, ace my ACMs, actually enjoy life, make new friends, maybe find a boyfriend, try to find my own style, my own life... you know, the usual, the usual."

"Get a boyfriend? You?"

"Is there something wrong with that?" I challenged, raising my chin.

"No, no," he shook his head, glancing down at his hands. "I was just wondering, might I suggest myself?"

I almost choked on my saliva. "Wait, what the fuck?"

He didn't meet my eye. "Just kidding, just kidding. You better hope some of the new blood meets your standards, then."

My eyes narrowed, but I didn't question it.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't sense it, of course. I'd be an absolute liar. I'd gone through this once, and I could tell when it happened again. Theodore Yu liked me. Or at least had some degree of feelings for me that was clearly past just platonic.

And I hadn't said anything yet because he hadn't either, and because... well, to be honest, I wasn't sure.

He was a good guy.

Like, an actually good guy. And after two years of spending time with him, I'd argue that we made a pretty good match.

But I was still scared. Terrified, even. I didn't know if I was ready or not. And he never said anything, so I was just letting it drag on.

Was it the same mistake I made with Seb? Yes, but this was different.

That had been avoidance because I was too scared to shut him down. This was... uncertainty.

Because I could see it happening in my head.

And that was the scary part.

I didn't know why and how I found this so scary. Like, it wasn't really going to affect me nearly as much as I thought, but I still thought it would. It was just printed in my head that dating early would be the end of my life, that it would ruin everything, that it would leave me in shambles.

Maybe it would.

But perhaps it was time to let those fears fade away.

Maybe.

I'll see. I wasn't going to date anyone just for the sake of the thrill of it.

That wasn't my style at all.

"If they don't, well," I said nonchalantly, "I'll just keep waiting. My standards are very high, after all."

"I can tell."

"Aww, because I rejected your friend like one year ago?"

"Yeah, basically," Theo said with a sigh. It was interesting, watching their friendship. While mines had crumbled around me, he and Seb had somehow went through turbulence and arguably made it out stronger. They weren't as close as before, I could sense that, but there was a newfound layer of trust in their relationship that I could only envy.

It was like after last year, they knew that they'd never abandon each other. That no matter what, they'd stick together through thick and thin.

How did they manage to do that? I could only marvel.

"So. Sixth form."

"I'm excited," he murmured.

"We all are," I deadpanned, "if only because we can stop handing in our devices every night."

"Imagine the freedom. We can leave school basically any time we want now, without needing teacher permission."

"As long as we come back in time for registration."

"I doubt you're going to be staying out until nine thirty every evening," he frowned. "Are you?"

"No," I said, shaking my head. "There's nowhere really to go within walking distance of school, honestly. The good restaurants are all like, ten minutes bus away. I have no energy to walk that far on a normal school night, so I think things are going to stay the same."

"They are, and they won't. New people means new chemistry."

"It's going to crash and burn."

"I actually don't think so," he admitted. "Like, we're all older now. We're not going to be openly hostile to anyone or start shit every two seconds just because we can."

"I think you're highly overestimating all of us."

"Am I? I don't know. Let's hope I'm right."

"But think of the drama."

He rolled his eyes. "With all due respect, Honoria, I couldn't give two shits about drama."

"It's entertaining. You got to admit that."

"We come here to learn and study, not for entertainment."

"But it's an excellent bonus, is it not?"

He deflated, looking rather odd in his posture considering his formal suit. "Dear mighty god."

"You asked me to come out here with you," I offered helpfully.

He turned his head slightly, glaring at me. "And I'm already regretting that. Greatly."

"Pity that. A bit too late, isn't it?"

He sucked in a deep, deep breath. My smile widened. Usually, it was him annoying me. To have our positions be reversed was a welcomed breath of change. I was enjoying this greatly, pushing on all his buttons and making sure he didn't have a single spot to rebut me in.

It was entertaining, the same way I loved to watch the drama at school unfold from the sidelines.

It was just hilarious. Nothing else to it. Good old fashioned fun, with no real consequences. Usually, anyways.

I mean, Clark Ford was still around.

He glanced at me then, suddenly. "We should go back in."

He probably had had enough of listening to me poke holes in every part of him. Most likely that, yes. With a tilt of my head, I got on my feet, and the two of us made our way back into the dining hall for the party.

-

hehehehehehe don't worry it's not ending yet, there's still around ten chapters showcasing sixth form life and etc etc but it's gonna be a lot more condensed than before, since the series was really only meant to focus on fifth form life anyways :D

mocks rn, i'm halfway through. going decently honestly! i've been working on hexes for exes, which is a rewrite of my novel of the same name and i'll probably start posting it after i finish posting this one :)))