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Chapter 16: To Be Loved

A week later, (Y/n) was surprised Kota didn't show his face. In fact, she hadn't heard anything from him despite the fact Funai had someone drop off the money to replace what the baku had stolen. She wasn't complaining though. Having the pink-haired male around every day was not her idea of a good time. Because of his absence, she was able to head to work as usual with no concerns at all, stepping into her building.

At once, as was clockwork, Akiko, her trusty assistant, came running along after her, informing her of the agenda for that day. When the (h/c) haired girl was hiring, Akiko stood out almost instantly. The girl was self-confident, sure, and she had a decent résumé, but what really caught her attention was the fact that she was incredibly knowledgeable about trends. That wasn't something (Y/n) was great at keeping up with, so Akiko really helped fill in things she was lacking. They made a great pair.

"You did manage to squeeze room in there for lunch, right?" the younger girl scoffed, earning a cocky smirk from her assistant.

"I can spoon feed you whatever your little minions made you while you review some summaries. How is that?"

"How kind of you."

"I do try, sugarplum."

(Y/n) gave a chuckle, rolling her eyes at the ravenette. Thankfully, her schedule wasn't too people-heavy, so she was able to get through most of her work before the end time Akiko estimated for her. Of course, that just meant she encouraged her to take a look at a few of her predictions for the fashion scene. The ravenette was scarily good at predicting trends on that note. In fact, as the younger girl glanced up, she noticed she'd gone and cut her hair shorter than usual. Noticing her staring, the girl did a little circle, giving her a good look as she posed.

"Very nice," (Y/n) chuckled, earning a wink from her as she struck another pose, "I appreciate the suggestions for me, too, but you know I won't take you up on them."

"Suit yourself. Literally. No one cares what you wear. You're the boss. I'm just saying we're going to see a huge rise in feminine clothing starting in fall. All things shiny, bright, and excess. I'm still working on the colors but I'm expecting pinks and oranges. Maybe yellow."

"You haven't been wrong before. I'll assume you're already working with Shirai and the others."

"Of course. They can't get enough of me. Especially little Shirai. Rwar."

"What?"

"Rwar. You know."

The (h/c) haired girl shrugged. She didn't know. Akiko rolled her eyes and took a seat on her boss's table, stretching out her legs. The girl was a great assistant. No, it was more accurate to call her a perfect assistant. She knew tons about (Y/n)'s personality, enough to know that her relationship with Takuya Miyahara was holding her back. Frankly, she thought her boss could have done better. She made that well known, too; one of the many reasons the white-haired male disliked her. All the same, it was his fault (Y/n) knew nothing about dating.

"Is this you planning to ask out your coworker?" the younger girl sighed, "Or is this...a one-time occurrence?"

"C'mon. You've seen Shirai. What do you think?"

"I think this is a conversation H.R. would want to hear. Speaking of which, can you drop these off over there?"

Akiko snickered, standing up from the desk and obliging her work-bestie/boss by taking the papers. Striking one more dramatic pose against the doorframe before she left, the girl waited for (Y/n) to snap a picture of her. Spinning around and placing her hand on her hip, she proudly requested royalties, strutting out of the room like she owned the place. The younger girl chuckled. She loved Akiko. Who didn't?

Curious about what she said about feminine being "in", the girl pulled up Idyll. It was a social media platform that had existed prior to her. Though, it wasn't at all popular and fell under the radar, but ever since she had bought it up and implemented changes, it turned out to be ridiculously profitable for her. It took barely six months to take off since she got a hold of it. Now it was the most used social media platform in the world, especially popular in Athain and Echal. She had hired so many people since her work had begun two years prior but Akiko had been with her the entire time. She was a large part of her success.

So, of course, if the ravenette ever anticipated a trend, the (h/c) haired girl believed her. She began scrolling through videos of people posting their looks. So far, it was looking like fashion was heading in that direction. Hair and - sometimes - makeup aside, the combination of clothes was on the verge of becoming feminine. There weren't a lot of strong colors being shown though despite it usually being one of the larger predictable trends of summer.

It was then that (Y/n) inadvertently stumbled upon Kota. She watched him do a video on a viral dance trend that had been going around. Admittedly, he was not a bad dancer, putting enthusiasm into his movements and making them as concise but dramatic all the same. People in the comments were going crazy for him, calling him the cutest thing to ever exist and constantly babying him.

Curious, she clicked onto his account, unsurprised when most of his content revolved around singing or dancing. He was supposed to be an idol-in-training, after all. Just as he showed her, he had a ridiculous follower count for not having debuted yet. Interestingly enough, in most of Kota's videos, he wore feminine clothing, too. Or, perhaps it was more accurate to say he skewed the lines of gender, really, since he wore androgynous clothing, too. It suited him. If only his mouth wasn't filthy and he had a good personality.

"Okie dokie," Akiko hummed, stepping back into the room, "All set."

"Do you know about Ren Tatsumi's son?"

The ravenette looked at her boss like she was an idiot, disapprovingly putting her hands on her hips. She was aware the (h/c) haired girl was far more interested in material news like the stock markets and marketable trends, but the assistant couldn't believe her boss had no clue about something so basic. After all, even if he wasn't Ren Tatsumi and Sakura Chika's son, Kota was very talented and unique in his own right. People were going crazy for him.

"Didn't I put papers on your desk about him a few weeks ago?" the ravenette sighed, making herself a cup of coffee, "He's seriously popular. When he debuts, it's going to be a massive deal. I heard it's in the works for sometime near the end of summer, hence my prediction."

"What, Kota's going to sway the fashion industry to feminine?"

"Mhm. Unless his father does something more groundbreaking, which, to be fair, is entirely possible. That man looks good in everything he's near. Mm. Mm."

(Y/n) contemplated that fact. Maybe she didn't realize just how well-known Kota was because he wasn't officially anything yet. Right now, he was just riding on the popularity of his parents but, clearly, there was something else there. She admitted he could sing and he did have clear experience with dancing and acting. Still, it baffled her a bit that the Kota she knew was considered a professional of sorts, even if mainly on social media at the time.

"Anyway we could get more information on that? His debut?" the (h/c) haired girl hummed, "Like sending some of our reporters?"

"Ah. You know how Nyx is. They've been keeping everything as tight as possible since Ren joined. But...I'm sure someone is up for the challenge."

"I'd like to make that a priority."

"Whatever you say, sugarplum."

The rest of the day progressed smoothly, even providing her some spare time to actually eat the meal Kohaku and Isao made for her. She couldn't help but scoff at the poorly-made lion the ravenette must have snuck in there. Judging on how bad it both looked and tasted, no doubt Kohaku would have thrown it in the trash if he knew it was there. All the same, she ate it, figuring she might as well cheer him on as he worked to separate himself from his previous reputation. That didn't mean she liked him, of course. Obviously...

By the time the day had wrapped up and the (h/c) haired girl was able to leave, she walked with Akiko to the front door. As had come to be the norm, the ravenette practically abandoned her when she saw Shirai, cozying up to him and inviting herself along with him on a walk. The assistant turned around with a wink to her boss, blowing her a kiss - one which the younger girl pretended to flick away. Akiko burst into a chuckle before turning back to her work flirt.

That left (Y/n) to pick up Takuya. She hated driving and despised cars (fae were pretty incompatible with any tech), so she always used the Miyahara family's driver to take her where she wanted to go. Before long, she and Takuya were standing in front of the new house, the agent there waiting for them. She was a friendly woman with a welcoming demeanor but the same was true of any retailer. It wasn't genuine.

"This is it?" the white-haired male questioned, visibly concerned about the difference between the modern-looking mansion and his family's historical mansion, "Is it really five minutes away?"

"Yep. It's not across town, just a small drive. But, see? It's not as close to the center of the city as your dad's house. That means we're given just a bit more privacy. Don't you love the greenery?"

"But no one takes care of plants like Nakao..."

"Takuya. Are you having second thoughts?"

The male frowned. He didn't know, honestly. While some part of him didn't want anything to do with the new place, he did realize it was something she deeply desired. If only because of that, he stepped forward with her to tour the place, still apprehensive. Everything was so different. It wasn't that he was overly attached to his family's main estate. He'd barely lived there, dragged around all across the world since he was little. But there was something innately terrifying about living without either one of his parents. He felt like he would let them down.

"This is the master bedroom," the realtor beamed, showcasing how big and grand the room was by holding out her arms, "411 square feet here and an accompanying master bathroom 250 square feet. There's also two walk-in closets for both spouses over here."

Takuya gravitated towards the bed. That was his first instinct. The male, dismissing all the information the woman was giving them, began running his hand lazily across the stage bed. He couldn't help imagining what their life would be like if they started sleeping together on a regular basis - like a couple. It would be different when he was her boyfriend, wouldn't it? A small smile appeared on his features as he pressed a little harder into the mattress.

(Y/n) was quick to stop him, hurriedly putting her hand on his and interlocking their fingers. That seemed to snap him out of the concerning thoughts she knew he was having. The male, delighted over his little fantasy, pulled her into a hug. If things worked out like that, he would have no complaints. Takuya was more than willing to move into a house all their own just for that. He let out a small sigh, inadvertently making the girl shiver. She had to interrupt his thoughts.

"Takuya," she blurted out, earning a pleased smile from him for saying his name, "Let's take a look at the bathroom?"

The male nodded, following along behind her, squeezing her hand tighter. She didn't know what to make of his expression as the woman began explaining the amenities of the bathroom. Certainly, there was an element of wonder to it but she wasn't certain it was the right kind. Warily, she watched as he asked the realtor question after question. He was starting to get more interested in the house.

They continued to look around, going over the guestrooms, the pool in the vast backyard, and even separate housing for any servants. The place was impressive. Cost wasn't really a concern for (Y/n) nor was it one for Takuya but she certainly wasn't paying through the roof for anything. Everything was new and modern. A change of environment like that would have really helped the white-haired male. At least, she hoped so.

"Any other questions?" the realtor smiled, checking something off on her clipboard.

"Not right now," the (h/c) haired girl mumbled, turning to Takuya, "What do you think?"

"I like it," he replied a bit too quickly, "When can we move in?"

"Since Ms. Shiratori requested to pay in cash all at once," the woman paused, thinking of a good date, "I can have everything ready for you in as little as a week. Then the place is all yours."

The male glowed. He couldn't wait. Of course, (Y/n) was relieved that he really did want to go through with getting a place for themselves but his enthusiasm worried her. She wondered if he wanted the house for the same reason as her, or if there was something else he was expecting from her. Conflicted, she jolted when the male hugged her, unsure what to say when he was conveying his own excitement.

The details were quickly set up, the (h/c) haired girl signing all the documents to claim the house for herself. She then paid the amount in full. Giving away that much money at once didn't feel great but it was necessary. She'd make the money back soon enough anyway, so she tried to dismiss it. She also tried to dismiss the fact that the amount of money she spent on the house must have been mere pennies to Takuya.

"We have to get furniture, right?" the white-haired male smiled, leaning his head on her shoulder as they drove back to the Miyahara mansion, "Are we going together?"

"I was going to hire some people for that. It's honestly too much work."

"Oh...then, should we talk about what we want the bedroom to look like? Uh, our bedroom?"

"I...hired people for that, too. Don't worry about it."

"B-But we should do it together! That's where we'll...We should do it together. Please? What if they don't understand how you like the bed? Or if they choose the wrong color for the walls? And what about - "

"I'll give them a list of the things we want in there. They're professionals."

"But...then it won't feel like...like our room."

(Y/n) let out a long sigh, watching him flinch and fluster over her displeasure. She didn't answer his concerns after that no matter how much he tried to convince her they were valid. The only thing he was trying to do was make the place cozy - more appropriate for intimacy. That would have been fine if Takuya wasn't brainwashed by his mother. But he was. So, until he wasn't any longer, the room should be as detached as possible.

"Uh," the male shyly stuttered as they arrived back at home, tugging on her sleeve bashfully, "Can we...be together tonight, too? I-I want to...finish watching our show."

No, he didn't. Takuya didn't care about the show at all. He didn't care about the characters or the plot or the actors, and he barely cared about the fact she liked it. The only reason he liked it was that it let him stay close to her, giving him an excuse to distract her with something while he cuddled up next to her. He wanted to do more, too. He'd tried. But letting him do anything...

"I'm a little tired today," she lied, walking back to her room while he hurriedly tried to keep pace with her.

"That's okay! We can just sleep."

"I have to get up early tomorrow."

"I will too, then. I-I'll get up early to make you breakfast? And then - "

"Takuya," she paused, stopping in place as she glanced up at him, "I don't want to have sex."

A look of dejection and fear appeared on the male's face when she said that, the male gripping at his chest as though it physically hurt him. He tried to open his mouth to explain it wasn't selfish but she already knew that, pressing her thumb against his lips. Confused, he clung to the part of her that was touching him, using both of his hands to keep her in place; to stop her from backing away from him. As he craved affection, he pressed into her, too, trying to hold back his tears.

"I've told you before," she continued, looking away from him so as not to be swayed, "That's not something I need from you."

"O-Of course it is," he panicked, squeezing tighter on her hand in horror, "You just have to give me a chance! I-I can do it! I know how! I promise I won't disappoint - "

"This isn't something we're arguing about. I'm just telling you I don't want - "

"Please, don't lie. Please. I know you're pent-up. I-It's so obvious that you need me to help. I can!"

A shiver of fear ran up the girl's spine as she watched Takuya close the gap between them. The male tugged her towards him and pressed his lips against hers, begging her to just trust him. It was hard to fight him off when he was stopping her from speaking, the younger girl attempting to twist her way out of the kiss. That being said, he only took it as her telling him he wasn't working hard enough, the male flustering and pressing harder against her, even pushing her back into the wall.

He was scared. He was scared. He was scared. Shakily, he raised one of his hands to fondle her chest, trying to remember how he was supposed to do it. Since she moaned into his mouth, he must have been doing it right, the male trying to balance the touching and the kissing. Was his hand supposed to be there? Or, maybe, it was supposed to be a bit higher? Was he supposed to rub down there, too? He forgot, but he did it anyway, taking her wetness as a sign he was doing a good job.

The worst part of all of it was that (Y/n) felt good. Takuya knew where to do just about everything to make her melt. His rubbing down there made her start shaking, her body begging her to go along with it. Her chest felt great, given special attention, and her mouth felt full with his exploration. But it was wrong. He was crying. He was in pain. He was terrified of the situation he had created himself, spiralling into a downward slope. She knew he was solely focused on her pleasure. That was the problem.

He wouldn't budge no matter what she did, forcing her to hurt him to snap him out of it. Biting down hard, the male let out a cry of pain and backed away, panting heavily as he tasted blood. In tears, he wondered what he did wrong. She didn't finish, she didn't want to continue, and she definitely didn't want him to touch her anymore. Terrified, he fell to his knees, breathing in heavily.

"I'm sorry," he trembled, clinging to himself as if it would stabilize him, "Please, let me finish. I-I have to prove - I shouldn't let you - You can't go to other people for this. I-I'm your boyfriend now, right? It's my job. It's my job."

"Takuya," she mumbled, despising how weak she was to him as she bent down next to him, "Please, calm down. Everything is fine."

"It's not. It's not. I couldn't...and you didn't...I'm so sorry. I should have done better. I should have - I just...sorry...but," the male paused as his tone became dark, "you can't go to anyone else."

"I never - "

"You can't."

"I won't! I...love you."

"B-But you...won't let me do anything. You can't love me if I don't do anything. That's not...That's not how that works."

A wave of silence washed over them. She said nothing because she knew he wasn't in the right state of mind to listen to her and he said nothing because his thoughts were getting cloudy. He wondered why she wouldn't let him do anything. She'd been getting really friendly with Isao lately. Was that it? Was she getting all her needs met from Isao? She didn't need him anymore because she wanted the ravenette? Tears began to pour down his cheeks. Would she notice if he killed Isao? Probably.

"I think you should go to sleep," the younger girl finally mumbled, helping the male to his feet as she led him there.

"D-Do you like Isao? Do you want to have sex with him?"

"No!"

"It's okay, if you do. I can...As long as I can, too, I don't mind, okay? So...i-if I can touch you, he can touch you, too. I-I want to touch you. I want you to be happy, so I can share, okay? Is that okay? Please, say it's okay?"

Takuya was gone. When he was in that state, there was no getting through to him. He broke down and didn't even comprehend language anymore, bargaining for something but not understanding what that something was. Really, it was just his way of pleading for love, his subconscious taking over to make him more "lovable", even accepting pity, if it had to. She wasn't entirely sure if it was for the best, but she laid him down on his bed. He knocked himself out after that.

Hesitantly, the younger girl left his room, holding back her own tears. She hated seeing him like that. It was like he was being possessed. Everything he ever did was to be loved, especially around her. The girl gripped onto her bedroom door as she thought about his behavior recently. No matter how much better he seemed to be getting, he always slipped back into that state, something having sunk its claws into his very being.

"Maybe...Maybe Kota would know," she whispered to herself, opening the door and being met with the front of a gun. It fired.

She stood in shock as she felt blood dripping down her cheek, robotically turning her head to see the bullet having landed in the wall behind her. It skimmed her. Snapping her head back to the gun, she noted the red string connected from the trigger to the door handle. She'd been targeted, but did she get lucky? Or did the idiot that set the trap up, in their overeagerness to kill her, neglect how human weapons worked? The answer was obvious.

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