All day I have been thinking about that kiss I shared with Alpha Maximus. The love that I felt for him, I thought, was a silly feeling that would disappear. But, the impossible has happened (at least for me), I am actually falling in love. In the past ten hours of our kiss, my feelings grew more and more.

Right now, I am standing in front of the mirror and staring at my lips replaying our kiss. I feel so happy when I say 'our kiss'. I haven't told Madeline otherwise, she will go around the whole palace telling everyone. And I still wasn't sure what Alpha Maximus' feelings were or did the kiss even mean anything to him. He and I haven't seen or talked to each other since the kiss.

I was about to go for a shower to start to get ready for the ball when my door knocked. I opened it surprised to find Alpha Maximus with dark circles under his eyes, his hair messed up as if he kept running through them and instead of the usual glow in his green eyes, there was.... tiredness? 

He cleared his throat, "May I?"

I smiled and let him in my room, I closed the door and he sat on a sofa. I sat on the sofa opposing him. The silence was deafening between us. I didn't know what to say and prayed to god that he would start talking soon or see this would kill me. He finally said something after five minutes and two seconds.

"Um, about the kiss." My heart paced slightly as I nodded looking into his eyes waiting for something. He stared deeply into mine, before softening his eyes and looking down. 

I suddenly had a bad feeling, my heart pumped in an unusual rhythm, my hands fidgeted as my stomach churned.

"Forget it, will you." He said strongly as my heart broke. My jaw slightly drew open my tears started to get a little blurry. It's as if the whole world around me paused. 

"Forget it?" I shakily that I couldn't even recognise my own voice. Alpha Maximus looked up in worry. He noticed how his word affected me, he sighed.

"Look, I am sorry. I just had this urge to kiss you, because of your undeniable beauty and your confidence... it's like no other I have seen. You challenge me. Intrigue me. And I won't hesitate to deny that." I listened to him as my heart pounded slightly still confused and broken.

"But, I am most likely going to find my mate today... And, I don't want to betray her. Despite the fact that..." He stared into my eyes, I wanted to hear this. I wanted to hear despite what!

"I am falling in love with you." He whispered so softly that to a human ear it was inaudible. Thanks to my werewolf ears. 

I bite my lips as tears shed. I quickly wiped them away, but he saw them. He stood on his knees in front of me.

"I am so sorry. I know I used you, but I didn't mean to. If there were no such things as a mate, I would have already marked you."

I blushed at that thought as tingles shot through my neck. I so hoped that, but he was right. And I hated it so bad that he was right. So the first time, when I start to fall in love. The universe has to find something to overrule my emotions. I thought about his mate and smiled at how lucky she would be to have someone like him.

I swallowed deeply, "I have to admit that I was starting to fall in love with you too," He sighed in regret that he played with my emotions.

"But I understand, and I am glad, that you care about women so much. I know that this" I said pointing to us, "would never work because you will have a mate and you need take care of her."

He nodded and thanked me for understanding. Despite the fact that I understood him and agreed with him, I just wished that there could be 'us'. If only I was his mate things would be so easier, but why would I, when there are tonnes of prettier ladies out there for him.

"Anyways, I will find my mate soon too as I will turn 18." His expression changed when I mentioned my mate and his fists clenched. I was confused at this action and was about to ask him what's wrong when he talked.

"I shall leave, but before that, since a promise is a promise. I promised to have the first dance with you and won't back away from my promise. We shall have the first dance at the ball together, mate or not." I nodded as he left. I closed my door and fell to the ground.

I burst into tears.

I started to like an Alpha. 

If only I was his mate, if only. But it was a long shot. But I had hope, if I had the courage to fall in love, I must have the courage to fight for my love. I prayed to the Moon Goddess and all other gods... Please let him be my mate. For the first time, I believed in all those fairy tales and love stories. 

What have you done to me, Alpha Maximus? You changed this bad girl into a lover girl. I guess it takes to be in love, to understand love. I needed him.

He was my oxygen.

He was my burning desire.

He was my need.

And now that he's gone.

I am broken.

I am left in no piece.