Chapter 19
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Minutes passed and I was shaking with the effort to not get up and find a blade.
I barely registered the door being opened.
I wanted to get up and throw myself into the arms of the person I saw first, but I couldn't get make myself move.
I heard footsteps running up the stairs and Jensen call my name frantically. The footsteps stopped when they reached my door.
I was still underneath the covers and hadn't moved an inch. I felt the bed dip beside me and the covers were gently pulled back.
"Oh, thank God you're okay."
Jensen's arms went underneath me and moved me so I was sitting on his lap. I rested my head against his shoulder still gripping the stuffed animal tightly. His arm wrapped around me while the other came up and rested on my head, holding it to his chest even though I had already played there. He didn't say anything as I cried into his chest, his hand eventually starting to run through my hair.
When my cries didn't lessen any he started speaking.
"Shhh, sweetheart. Calm down, everything's ok. Shhhh. Everybody gets hate. I get hate, Danneel gets hate, even Justice gets hate. They're just jealous, don't listen to what they say. You are so beautiful they didn't know what hit them. Your weight is nothing to be ashamed of. I'd much rather you look like this than like you did at the orphanage. You are not responsible for what happened to your family. There is nothing that you could've done. Jared, Danneel, Justice, and I, even Misha and Mark, even though you haven't met them officially, all love you. That's all that matters."
His chest rumbled as he spoke and his chest rose up and down with his steady breaths. Both of these things, combined with his deep and soothing voice calmed me down considerably. My cries were lessening and my eyes were closing. I was quickly falling asleep.
He laid me down on the bed before covering us up and taking me into his arms again. With his arms around me and the warmth radiating from his body, I fell asleep.
When I woke up, I was still encased in the warmth that came from Jensen. I looked up to see him looking at me with concern.
As soon I woke up I remembered everything that happened. It was already there, at the front of my mind. It wouldn't leave me alone.
I pushed my head back into my dad's chest, wanting to hide a little longer. His hand came back up to my head and stayed there, letting me know that it was okay. I sat there for a minute controlling my breathing and trying not to freak out again.
Once I was ready I pulled back and looked at his vibrant green eyes. His hand came around to rest on my cheek and his thumb rubbed it gently.
"I'm so proud of you. Not only did you call me, but you also didn't do anything to hurt yourself. I wanna show you something."
He pulled out his phone and I watched him as he unlocked it and opened twitter. I immediately grew weary at what he was going to show me.
Once twitter was loaded he went to his page and started scrolling down to the tweets he was getting. He turned the phone to me, but I refused to look at it. I heard him sigh before he started reading.
"@JensenAckles I hope you can help her with the loss."
"@JensenAckles Omg, she is so beautiful. I'm sorry for her loss."
"@JensenAckles I wish I was her. She's so pretty!"
The more he kept reading the more surprised I became.
They thought.... I was.... pretty?
Really?
After the first couple of tweets he read, I grew curious. I had to look and see if he was really reading them or just making them up.
But when I looked over at the phone, all of the tweets that he had read were right there. His entire page was filled with tweet after tweet of people saying they were sorry for my loss and happy that Jensen had adopted me. People were saying that they thought I would make an amazing addition to the family and others saying how pretty they thought I was.
There were only a couple of bad tweets that I saw and Jensen reported all of them. I could see the anger on his face as he read those and it looked like he was trying so hard not to reply.
By the time he stopped reading the smile on my face reached my ears. Metaphorically, of course.
"See?" he said.
"For every one bad tweet, there are hundreds of good ones. They love you and they wish you the best."
To Be Continued...
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