Another week has passed, I'm left with 3 weeks down to my delivery and decision if I'll get to live or not. I wasn't prepared, I hadn't thought of anything about it. I was just indulged in my new personal love life and kept dodging the main motive I was sent on the earth for. Derek left for the office half an hour ago, I was awake since 5 am this morning but I pretended to be sleeping, something inside me was off for one thing and on for the other.
I was living a real happy life now, Angela and Lucifer came to visit me two days ago and a day before that too. I wasn't being attacked or stalked by any other new ghost but still today, my happiness just lost it. Today my escape got an end and I fell on the porch of reality. Reality of the bigger problem I had in my life, for my life.

I lazily slid  off from the duvet and came downstairs to see for breakfast. Derek was so caring and attentive for me that he was leaving food chart everyday on the fridge along with the already made food inside. Everyday he left me with no work no loads but I'm cooking dinner for him since we are living together which by taste is disaster but I know he appreciates my hard work. We order pizza afterwards.

Gobbling my cereal and fruits, I wished for Angela and Lucifer to come and stop by so that I could talk to them. I wanted to ask them to guide me about how to do what I'm supposed to do.  It was about five morsels only when they both came out of my living room, not surprising me this time.

"Hmm... someone's living Cinderella life huh" Angela said sitting in front of me and taking an apple slice from my plate.

"Yeah well...he is so much of a prince charming you know, he leaves food charts for me.....like really food charts...my mother would marry him right now" and Angela chuckled while I just nodded looking at my food.

"But the question is, will you?" Lucifer said picking the whole food plate from behind me and sat with it beside me.

"Well...I haven't....marriage....ahah( giggled nervously) isn't it too soon...I mean..."

"Oh relax Stevens, we ain't marrying you now..." He said while throwing a guava slice in my cereal. I frowned and started digging my spoon inside to pick that out while saying " I don't like guava...and marriages". I finally found that slice and picked it out of my bowl.

"But he is looking forward for it" Lucifer said so nonchalantly, I almost coughed listening to him. My eyes shot open and I looked at Lucifer while Angela sighed in once-a-swine-always-a-swine mode.

"Wha....what...do you..how do....hah...you read....read his mind...?.....oh god.." I forgot if there was any food even there. Was Derek really looking forward to marry me? I wasn't even near to relationship, I mean I was surely loving this life with him but...woah commitment freaks me out. Was he really...? Am I just....destroying him more..?

"Ya...ah yes yes.. yes I...heh I-read-his mind.." Lucifer said mimicking the panicked stammering me which fumed me even more.

"Cut it out Lucy. Honey, don't ya worry he is just fooling you around" well  I know you would call me total freak but knowing that Lucifer was kidding about Derek thinking of marrying me upset me slightly. But shooing my thoughts away I decided to ask them for why I called them here.

"Anyways, I need to ask your pieces of wisdom for how am I going to do what's required to get me and my baby alive" I said putting my bowl aside as the will of eating suddenly dried up. Now that bowl of cereal was making me nauseous.

"Well....we can't really help you with that..." Angela said looking up at me. Lucifer was roaming in the house opening drawers checking shelves, I decided to leave him be.

"Oh come on Angela don't do that, I mean...at least...okay at least give me a hint. We are talking about murdering someone for me right, to replace him with me, I need to get some advice...expert advice."

"Iris...calm down...you don't have to plan a murder. You just have to make sure that someone has to die for you on that day. It can a sacrifice, a conspiracy, a debt submission...anything. You have to think and plan yourself, we can't help you with that."  I was disappointed to be honest.

"You gonna be even more disappointed when I'll tell you that Derek has got a ring hidden inside toolbox" Lucifer came from I don't know where, saying this. My attention was totally blown to him now. He was holding a blue velvet ring case. I was shunned with the view of it. I raised immediately with horrified expression. The hint of overwhelmed happiness and a full tank of sheer weirdness, unbelievability, fear of commitment and cringe from wedding came rushing to my mind.

"Lucifer Christ. It's an offence rummaging through someone else's home. Why did you disclose it" Angela yelled at him from her seat while he just winked at her and now was looking at me with half squinted eyes.

"I don't...I don't understand...he can't marry ME...I don't...I don't do rings...it's just been a week...what the hell" I pushed my hair behind with clenched paws.

"Exactly what I'm saying Iris. He can't marry you, you are dead. So for whatever guidance you called us for, you need to stop that and start looking for a real reason....to live. You need to start seeing the consequence of doing it as the only thing you want. Derek wants to marry you and you will be  asshole for bailing him. Think of it Iris, what can you do to make yours, your baby's and the one you Love's life a beautiful place." He said all these things holding the case in his hands. I was way much motivated by his words but shocked equally for listening all these from Lucifer. Like for real!

"Oh......my....gawd...my husband....my creepy annoying rude bitch husband has grown some real brain" Angela said dramatically raising up from her chair while Lucifer just rolled his eyes in annoyance and slight embarrassment. I laughed at Angela's words. But whatever he said to empower me, I was still not having it inside me.

It was evening, Angela and Lucifer left after I made them watch some episodes of FRIENDS which they loved of course, there's no way one don't love friends. I was left alone again, I kept staring at the ring all the time thinking why I wasn't feeling happy. There was no way I could leave Derek, he was more than I deserved but I was still not happy...why?
Suddenly it stroke my mind that, was I everything Derek deserved?
I got answers of all my questions amd just then Derek came home with a bottle of champagne gleaming like a five year old to me.

"Ire....where are you.... I've got us champagne babyy...we gonna celebrate" he yelled from downstairs probably throwing his blazzer away on the side couch and now moving to upstairs. I was thinking what made him so happy and thats when I realised I still had the ring with me which would ruin his surprise. I tried to hide it behind the pillow but I was too late, Derek came hovering inside beaming with happiness but his smile dropped and eyes stuck when he found the blue velvet case in my hands.

"I'm...I'm sorry Derek... I.....im really..." I started explaining myself and thinking reason about why was I rummaging through the damn toolbox. I should have asked this from Lucifer himself, he was the one all exploring and adventuring the house. Swine!

"Iris...you...well..(chucked nervously)" he was trying to say something, I could clearly see he was shook. He ran his fingers through his hair pushing them behind. I inherited this habbit of his now too.

"I'll...I'll go keep it there...there only.. I'm sorry..." I said trying to get up from the bed and go but he stopped me halfway.

"Iris..." He said. I looked at him and I could feel him seeing me walking down the aisle in that white flowery wedding dress. It freaked me out.

"Noooo...Derek....before you go on one knee or whatever....nooooo..." I said freakishly. He giggled, to my surprise.

"Im not going on my knees." He said pulling me in his arms, ah baby bump comes in between the coziness though.

"I don't do rings Derek" I was still half freaked while he was being all chilled and calmed pushing my hair behind my ears and tracing fingers down my face.

"What else then? Neckpiece? Or wait... Iris would like a tv set....or if got no money then a big packet of lays could also fix that up isn't it..." I couldn't understand, wasn't he upset at all that I was indirectly saying no to him. He was being funny though.

"I don't do marriages either" I said biting my inner lips looking straight down to my bump between us.

"I'm not asking you to marry me anyway....." He said pulling my chin up which I did by myself as confusion clouded my mind. What did he mean?

"Well then...the....ring...?" I asked trying to sound cool. God I made fool of myself again giving him clear indications that I was expecting him to be this fool and ask me to marry him, why would he like to marry me...well I would be thrilled if he would. So hope he would! I still don't do marriages.

"Oh i bought it for my dad, he has to gift it to Mom tomorrow, on their anniversary." He said taking the case from my hand and opening it, the shining big diamond ring brightened in his eyeballs.

"Don't you think it's bit of an outdated design for you.." he said looking down at it while I was just looking at his face open mouthely because....duh....I was still feeling too fool of myself. And not to forget Lucifer, that bitch created this shit at first place.

Derek went inside the lavatory to get cleansed and freshen up meanwhile I kept staring at the ring and think of all the things I thought throughout the day regarding the marriage. How will I ditch him or tell him exactly how I felt. This whole stupid mom's-ring incident definitely invoked all these concerns of future and possibilities of this relationship in my mind. No matter how many times I blamed Lucifer for making the moron girl of me in front of Derek, I somehow understood the bigger picture behind his act.

I wasn't able to decide whether this, this relationship of Derek and me was actual one to tell him all the truth. I indeed wanted to live with him and possibly couldn't think of anything else without him but it should be mutual so, was it?

I decided that I needed more time. More time to realise and figure out about the relationship, anyways it had been just one week since we were like together. Not even 'sleeping' sleeping because of my end of seventh month pregnancy.
Derek came out and told me everything about his office and the reason behind his zeal was that the book they had been working for since past few weeks was ready to be published now and Derek's team did a great job. I was happy as I just shooed all those critical thoughts away from my mind and focus on the present, just like I decided to.

"Ire... tomorrow we are going to Manhattan. Do you need a dress or anything?" He said wiping his hands off after dinner. I was still eating.

"Why....oh ..oh...your parent's anniversary. Derek...is it really important for me to go...?" Parents never liked me. My mother was one of a kind, moreover she kicked me out of her body after 36 hour of labor so there was no other option for her but love me. I never understood parents or their needs or wants because I never had one that way. My father left us when I was what.. barely 4. I remember his face from the pictures only. I don't even remember my merry time in that house. All I remember is my mother working her ass off day and night while me living with Aunt Sophia, our trailer neighbor and help her out in her hamburger shop and after that, I just worked in the library which made me fall for books.
I never did moms and dads, neither they ever loved me.

"Ire...I love you...I have to tell them right, they need to meet you. I promise you no coffee at living rooms, no meeting aunts and uncles, no expectations." He said coming up to me and pecking my left cheek he took my plate as I finished and went in the kitchen again for washing that.

"But Derek that's not the point...I'm...I'm pregnant...you are perfect guy and which perfect guy's parents want their son's one week girlfriend 30 weeks pregnant..."

"31" he yelled from inside.

"What...?"

"You are 31 weeks down baby....." He said wiping the plates off and putting them back in the shelf.

"Whatever...hey other side.....other side....argh you always do it wrong" I said while raising up from my chair and going to the kitchen.  I took the plate from him and put them on the other side, Derek was just putting them everywhere.

"See...I make mistakes you fix me...I do dirty you clean me...that's more than a one week relationship Ire" he said cooping me in his arms from behind and rubbing his chin on my neck tickling me. I tried to shrug away while laughing.

"Der...Derek...stop..." I said laughingly while he was tickling me but he stopped after a few seconds and buried his face in my neck. I so wanted him to be there all the time. It always felt like renewed in his arms.

"I love you Iris, there's no place of judgement there. I would suggest that black dress you wore in that party that day. You look so sexy in black." 

There was something so positive and optimistic in his confessions, although I  heard from him like hundred times by now but it always gave me immense amount of fear and guilt but also a contentment that makes every wrong and lie worth playing. I clutched his hands wrapped around my belly when I suddenly felt a push from inside on the left side on my naval. Derek immediately raised from my neck and touched the side gently.

"Did it...did it just...kick?" He said and I don't know why I felt his voice more emotional than interrogative. I nodded with my beaming eyes and pressed lip smile. He glowed with happiness and turned me around.

"It kicked when I said I love you. See, the baby also knows what's right. Stupid mama" and very surprisingly he bent on his knees and held my bump side to side gently. I was looking down at him.

"Derek what...are..."

"Sshhhhh..... Ire...let me talk to him.
Hey babyy...I'm Derek...might become your father someday once your mom starts wearing rings....would ya like that..?" He said with utmost soft and babish voice. I couldn't stop but cry at the moment. I was hiding so much from him that it was killing me from inside. I was not able to be happy although I was overwhelmed by his action. My heart was filled with remorse and shame so much that happiness wasn't touching it's walls.

"If it will be alive"

****************************

Time to tell Derek the truth or not?
Derek will make a sexy father though.

Don't forget to vote and comment fellas.

Sending you all loads and loads of happiness.

Signing off
Shruti!