"Ow...." Ikkaku moaned. "Where am I....?"

The last thing Ikkaku had remembered, was two instances of the woman calling herself Erza Scarlet hammering him on the head painfully, and knocking him out....or was it 3 instances? 4? Oh never mind...

What Ikkaku hadn't realized, was during the time he had been knocked out, he had been dragged through the desert, slept through several intense battles, and was blown around along with his captors by Ulquiorra's Cero Oscuro. And for the man who was known as the Luckiest Man in Soul Society....that was pretty darn unlucky....

"Where the hell?" Ikkaku muttered as he opened his eyes and his vision focused. He looked around a bit to find that he was buried under a pile of rocks, miraculously alive. His arms and legs were tied up, and his sword, Hozukimaru, was nowhere to be found.

"Dang it.." muttered Ikkaku. "This definitely isn't my day....it started out fine, I got to meet a real strong guy who was good enough to beat me...but now I get kidnapped by a bunch of stupid wizards and they decide to leave me buried under a pile of rocks...brilliant...just brilliant.."

Suddenly, the boulders above Ikkaku shifted and gave way, the rocks were knocked aside as Gajeel peered through. "Heh, thought I heard someone down there, so it's you huh?"

"Well well, Gajeel, student of the legendary Metalicanna." said Ikkaku with a grin. "I'd fight you now, but I'm tied up, and I don't seem to see Hozukimaru anywhere."

"Ya mean this?" Gajeel asked grinning as he held up Ikkaku's sheathed sword. "I've kinda been looking after it...tried to use it a few times out of curiosity, but I guess it only works for you."

Gajeel pulled Ikkaku out of the rubble and tore the ropes off of him, then he gave Ikkaku back his sword.

"What the hell?" said Ikkaku. "What are ya doing?"

"Well to tell you the truth." said Gajeel. "Considering you're the only guy I could find here, I thought you would be the perfect backup.."

"Relying on an enemy for backup!?" Ikkaku said. "You're either crazy, or quite an honorable man....I'm liking you more and more Gajeel! So..I take it you need help finding the rest of your group eh? Well a word of warning, I'll take em all in the moment I find em!"

"You...are going to fight Erza?" said Gajeel. Gajeel paused for a moment then started laughing. "Geeheeheehee!!!! Yeah right! Good luck with that!!"

A vein started to pop up on Ikkaku's shiny bald head. "Hey!! I could take that Erza whoever down!! Just who is she anyways!?"

Gajeel grinned at Ikkaku and mimed pounding a fist on his head.

Ikkaku's jaw dropped in in a mixture of fear and shock. "A woman with that much strength in just her right arm alone should not be called a woman.."

"Anyways..." said Gajeel. "I was feeling like maybe you could lend a hand now...Since we're already completely surrounded."

Ikkaku looked around and grinned. All around in between the dark trees he could see the glowing eyes of multiple hollows, all of them uttering vicious cries. "Eh? More things to fight? Is it Christmas already!?"

Gajeel grinned. "Yeah...consider it my present from me to you."

"I LOVE IT!!!" Ikkaku yelled as he unsheathed Hozukimaru and kept the sheathe in his left hand. He dashed at the hollows which began to charge out, snarling ferally at the Soul Reaper, their main enemies in the spiritual world. Ikkaku sliced and diced his way through the hollows, using his sheathe to defend from incoming attacks, laughing with joy at the battle he had encountered. Meanwhile, on the other end, Gajeel was taking out multiple hollows as well, turning his arms into giant extending metal poles and piledriving the demons into the ground.

Soon Ikkaku and Gajeel had destroyed every last hollow. Ikkaku turned to look at Gajeel with a grinning face. "Heh! If we weren't enemies, I would've loved to have you in my squad!!"

"If you would just get over the stupid notion of enemies," said Gajeel with a grin of his own. "I'd asky ya to join our guild, ya ain't half bad!"

"Don't underestimate the 11th Squad of Soul Society!" said Ikkaku. "Of all the squads, we're the strongest fighters and that's a fact!!"

"Oh?" said a voice. "A Soul Reaper and a strange human...in the Soul Wilderness? The Espada seem to be quite incompetent today..."

Suddenly out of the darkness dropped a large humanoid muscular hollow. It's body was black with it's hollow hole near it's stomach. It had large forarms with bony claws and a massive spiked tail. It's mask was the appearence of a reptilian skull with large ram's horns.

"Eh!? Are you their daddy or somethin?" Gajeel said, eying the large hollow.

"Naw..that's a Menos Grande!" said Ikkaku. "A class of Menos that's called an Adjuchas, they're one rank below the most powerful hollow class Vasto Lorde...." (Take note, that all the Espada, save the number 9 ranked one who is the only Gillian Espada, are all either Adjuchas or Vasto Lorde.)

"So it's stronger then the others?" Gajeel asked as he formed a spiked sword from one of his arms.

"Ya kidding?" said Ikkaku with a happy grin. "It's a step up enough for it to be at least mildly a little more entertaining!!! HAHAHA!!"

Ikkaku took the butt of his sword and rammed it against his hilt. "EXTEND!! HOZUKIMARU!!"

Once again, Hozukimaru turned into it's true form, becoming the long handled spear with a red horsehair plume on the end. Ikkaku grinned and looked at the Adjuchas. "So what's your name big guy?"

"Name? My name has no consequence." said the Adjuchas. "I devour, I feed, I survive...and now you are merely another meal."

"Ha!" said Ikkaku. "Then allow me to give you my name...call me Ikkaku Madarame...your killer...and I think I'll name you....hmmm.."

"Mince meat?" Gajeel suggested.

"BINGO!!" said Ikkaku as he charged the hollow and spun his spear around with impressive skill.

The hollow lashed out it's arms and tail, in an attempt to pummel Ikkaku into submission as Ikkaku swung Hozukimaru left and right, blocking every single blow. Ikkaku then jumped up and kicked the hollow in the masked face, causing it to stumble backwards as the Soul Reaper stabbed his spear multiple times at it's chest, with the speed of a bullet.

The hollow roared out in anger and pain as blood spurted out from it's chest wound.

Gajeel moved forward, ready to slice up the hollow with his Sword Of The Iron Dragon. But Ikkaku suddenly shouted out. "NO!! This is my own fight!! I don't do two on 1 unless it's absolutely necessary!! If my opponent is stronger then me, then I can go ahead and die!! But right now it's my fight!!"

The adjuchas considered Ikkaku for a minute. "You're a strange one....you see these battles as fun...like it is some sort of recreational sport..and therefore you don't wish for somebody to interfere and take that fun away."

"You're pretty smart for a dumbass hollow.." said Ikkaku.

"Watch who you're calling dumbass you freaking baldy!!" The hollow shouted as he charged Ikkaku.

"Baldy...?" Ikkaku's eye twitched. The next thing the hollow knew, there was burst of speed, and both his right arm and left leg had been sliced clean off.

The hollow collapsed in surprise as Ikkaku suddenly appeared behind him, a livid look on his face.

"I ain't bald..." said Ikkaku as a dangerous shadow crossed his face, and his head gave a bright sparkle. "Ya got that? Let me hear you say it.."

"Ugh....errgghh.." was all the adjuchas could say.

"Close enough.." said Ikkaku as he stabbed Hozukimaru straight into the hollow's head. The hollow dissapated into dark energy and evaporated away.

"Heh.." said Gajeel. "So..maybe we should..."

"AHHAAAA!!!" Ikkaku pointed Hozukimaru at Gajeel's chest. "Not yet!! First we're going to have a real rematch at full power!! Come on Gajeel!! Let's have some fun!!"

Gajeel sighed. "Are we really going to do this now?"

"Come on!! Come on!!!" said Ikkaku. "Ya know you crave it just as much as I do!!"

"Well I don't." said another voice, right before a familiar armored fist hammered itself right onto Ikkaku's head.

"Not again...." moaned Ikkaku as he fell unconscious once more.

When Ikkaku awoke again, he was tied up once more, and Hozukimaru was sheathed back in it's unreleased form at his side. Sitting in front of him was Erza Scarlet.

"Awe crud." Ikkaku muttered. "It's you, are ya gonna knock me out again?"

Erza shook her head. "Actually, I have a proposition for you..."

Ikkaku looked around and saw Gajeel sitting nearby. "Heh...guess you two are the only ones you've managed to find so far..Hah! Now I suppose you want me to become backup too!"

"Actually, I want you to do something else for us.." said Erza. "If you help, we'll let you go, no questions asked."

Ikkaku eyed Erza with a slightly raised eyebrow. "Hmmm...ya seem honest. What do ya want?"

"I hear that you know Ichigo Kurosaki." said Erza. "The thing is, he's in this forest right now."

"Eh?" said Ikkaku. "Kurosaki!? HA!! That kid seems to be everywhere!! Let me guess, ya want me to track down his reitsu for you because I know him so well!"

Erza nodded. "He told us about you, Ikkaku Madarame...I hope you will be cooperative."

"Fine fine.." said Ikkaku. "Only I want one other thing besides my freedom, that is.."

Erza looked a little surprised. "Name it.."

"I want another chance to fight Iron Dragon over there." said Ikkaku nodding towards Gajeel. "That's all I want, a rematch...get me?"

"Fine." said Erza. "If Gajeel has no problem with it.."

"Sure sure." said Gajeel shrugging. "I never could turn down a good fight anyways. Unless it's with Accelerator..."

"Hmm? Why not Accelerator?" Erza asked.

"Have you seen anybody land a hit on that guy!?"

Erza nodded. "Good point."

2 hours later, Ikkaku was leading Erza and Gajeel through the forest. Ikkaku was allowed to keep his sword, given that he wouldn't try to escape. However, Ikkaku wasn't about to let a fight with Gajeel slip by, so he behaved....mostly.

"Come on!!" shouted Ikkaku looking back at the other two. "Keep up!! Kurosaki's reitsu is unusually high right now..that means he must be using Bankai right now..and that kid's got a pretty frightening speed when he uses bankai, so unless we keep up our pace, we'll lose him in 3 seconds flat...move it!!"

"Jeez.." said Gajeel. "Ain't he bossy."

"Don't worry," said Erza. "Even if he get's too far ahead, his moon-like cranium will guide us straight to his location."

"Moon-like cranium!?" said Ikkaku with an angry look.

"She means you have a shiny bald-"

"I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!!!" Ikkaku screamed. "I'M NOT BALD!!! I'M JUST....THINNING!!!"

"Yeah...keep telling yourself that." muttered Gajeel.

"EEEHHHH!!!?" said Ikkaku with an angry grin. "Don't look so relaxed Iron Dragon. Someday, you're going to be having my problems!!"

"I'm going to be bald?"

"I'M NOT BALD!!!" Ikkaku screamed. "he-hem...I mean, no! I meant someday you're gonna run out of people and things to fight, you'll be scrounging around for strong opponents, but they will be nowhere to be found!! You should accept how grateful I am to you for providing me with somebody to surpass besides my captain and Kurosaki!!"

"So..." said Gajeel. "I'm not going to be bald?"

"I'M NOT FREAKING BALD!!!!" Ikkaku shook himself. "Heh!! stupid mages, getting me riled up...almost as much as those level 5s 20 years ago..."

"Level 5!?" said Erza. "You know about espers!?"

"Eh!? Of course!" said Ikkaku. "Soul Reapers help dead souls from all dimensions pass to the Soul Society, so of course we'd know a bunch of stuff. The dimensions where espers are present though...freaking weird!! The dimension where your Railgun girl comes from for example...hehehehe...you should see what happened there in the death department....I remember 4 espers...Black Whisper, Impulser, Sky Scorcher, and Smack Wave...4 of the original 7 level 5s. What a bunch of powerhouses...then what happens to them? They all get killed by some stupid assassin with a esper trophy hunting obsession!"

"Yo.." said Gajeel. "I know this wasn't part of the deal..but tell us what happened. I get bored just walking around"

"Fine.." said Ikkaku. "I guess this happened right after I joined the 11th squad then....

Academy City, heh! They should've just called it Wacko City instead! The dimension there was pretty lax where hollows were concerned. Hollows are normally drawn towards an area with a lot of saturated spiritual energy. But thanks to the fact that this world was more infused with magic then reitsu, hollows never really appeared....good thing too, magic like that has a strange effect...while normally in other worlds, Soul Reapers and Hollows cannot be seen by normal human eyes, we're actually all visible in that world as well as your little country you call Fiore. I imagine even one hollow sighting would cause a panic.

Anyways....whenever powerful souls...like espers...or magicians, died there, chances were, they could become powerful Menos class hollows right on the spot, depending on the circumstances of their death..so my squad along with my captain (Kenpachi) were sent in sometimes to pass any soul on right away that might die...if it was someone like a level 5 that is.

We recieved a report that some big deal Level 5 named Eolas Stuart was about to snuff it thanks to some sort of hit marked on him by an assassin calling himself Death Reach. What a name eh? Well we watched the assasin hunt that Eolas kid down...and boy was it a sight. That Smack Wave..that was his ability name...was a power house!!! His telekinises made your little Gunha Sogiita look like a mouse!! But then things got troublesome for him...

That Death Reach, he had no supernatural power...non whatsoever...but his moves...his skill, he was a bigger pro then any I'd ever seen...he would've given Captain Soi Fon a run for her money. Nobody knew who he really was...he covered his tracks well, his face was always hidden by that black mask with red goggles....but heck, he knew how to kill, he took down that level 5 like it was just a routine trip to the office. The equipment he had with him...rumor is he made it himself, specifically to hunt level 5 espers and other guys with supernatural abilities.

Anyways, we passed on Eolas's soul without any big deal once Death Reach left...but that wasn't the end of it....I didn't know what made me...but I stayed behind...I wanted to really fight this guy...just an urge I guess. A normal urge, especially for me.

So later that evening, I tracked down the guy's reitsu...don't be surprised...every human has reitsu...but it's real small, tiny, almost impossible to detect...Anyways, I confronted they guy....I had already released Hozukimaru, and I said. "Death Reach! Fight me!!"

The faceless mask looked at me, his black slender combat armor looked like something from a scifi movie. "Who are you...and why do you seek to do battle with such a primitive weapon and attire?"

I told him not to judge a book by it's cover, then I challenged him again..

The guy held up his right arm to show some damaged armor and some blood. Then he said. "I'm injured fearless one...I have just killed an esper called Impulser who could control molecular vibrations...by far he was one of my most powerful opponents...and I need to rest...but I shall be happy to fight you in 3 weeks time at this spot."

Of course I felt happier then the first time I met my captain and fought him...I was contemplating the fun drawn out fight we would have, how we would exert ourselves to our very last breath, and fight with all of our being.

3 weeks later, I had trained to my core, and I had even resolved to use my bankai, though I normally kept it hidden so that I wouldn't be promoted to captain and could keep fighting under my own captain.

We met again...and I activated my bankai....which was the first and last thing I did....I didn't even see him move...in about 1 second flat, he had planted a detonating charge on my lower back and jumped away using his accrobatic prowess. Next thing I knew, I was lying on my face with a combat knife pointed at my neck.

However, he didn't kill me...instead he just said. "You lose"

I asked him what he was going to do next, and if I'd ever see him again. Heh! He said he didn't have time for another fight...since he had another target he was hunting. He said, that he heard that in the future there would be a mega strong esper with the ability to use the power of dragons that would destroy the ultimate evil....he said that once that prophecy passed, then he would hunt that esper and afterwords fight me again..

I told him I looked forward to that day in which we would meet....and the guy plain dissapeared...never showed up anywhere on heaven or earth again....what a guy eh!?

Ikkaku finished his story with a satisfied look. "Well? Am I lucky or what? To have fought a guy like that and survived!!"

Erza looked thunderstruck. "The one you said Death Reach was hunting for....it sounded like..."

Gajeel nodded. "No kidding..."

"Well he's probably retired now." said Ikkaku shrugging. "Everyone in both your worlds think Railgun's dead...remember? It's probably better that she goes back to Yugami town then risk meeting....him..."

"Just lead us to Ichigo.." said Erza.

"Hmmph.." said Ikkaku. "You don't plan on backing down at all do you?"

"No..." said Erza. "And Mikoto wouldn't either..."

Twilight Prankster's Spectacular R.I.F.T. cast interview.

Twilight Prankster: "HELLLOOOOOO!!!! Hi there readers, today is the spectacular first episode of the cast interviews with the characters of this series!!! Watch, as I go around interviewing these folks without their consent!!! After all it wouldn't be fun with their consent would it? HAHAHAHAHA!!! Okay....for our first episode, we will interview Ulquiorra Cifer!! How are you Ulquiorra?"

Ulquiorra:....is there any particular reason you're following me?"

Twilight Prankster: Well....those are very cold eyes you've got.....okay first question....are you a robot?

Ulquiorra:...........

Twilight Prankster: Is your brain nothing but a calculating computer that cannot compute love otherwise it would blow up?Ulquiorra:...........

Twilight Prankster: Are all Espada Mexicans or Spanish?

Ulquiorra:............

Twilight Prankster: Have you ever met an Arrancar named....Rrrrrrrrrromando!?

Ulquiorra:.......yes..

Twilight Prankster: REALLY!? OH BOY!! Where is he now!?

Ulquiorra:....I killed him.....he was of no use to Aizen...

Twilight Prankster: Oh....well casting aside how very casually and remorselessy answered that question......I will move on to fan mail......Koharu from Shibuya asks....Ulquiorra, what color is your underwear?

Ulquiorra: *points finger at Twilight Prankster and charges energy* Cero Oscuros...

Twilight Prankster: Oh...he didn't like that question.....*gets blown away by Cero Oscuros.*

Somewhere in Mexico....

Twilight Prankster: Well, Yeah, I got blown to Mexico....well that's it for the first episode of Twilight Prankster's Spectacular R.I.F.T. cast interviews!! Toodleloo!!!! Now to go find a Mexican Birthday party for the sole purpose of stealing their pinata.....yep...that's my candy now!!