Hey guys!

I've got a bit of a treat for you today! I actually wrote out this oneshot a few months ago and had been planning on giving it to you earlier, but I was waiting for a time when it would fit into the plot of the story. Basically my inspiration for this scene was:

-How can I give Yona and Ezra some bonding time?

-How can I make it super girly and adorable?

-And best of all... how can I make it all go wrong in the most random and hilarious way possible?

And from these three thoughts, this oneshot was born! I had so much fun writing it, and my only hope is that you guys have half as much fun reading it. As always, let me know what you think! A vote and a comment go a lot farther than you would believe.

I really appreciate you guys! Enjoy!

***

"I don't know how this happened! We were acting perfectly normal, relaxing in the water, but then a fat lady started screaming at us, a dog named Hanzo ran through the room carrying my dagger in its mouth, we got chased out, and I ended up starting a fight with some officials while wearing nothing but a bathrobe! I swear, it wasn't my fault!"

***

"It's been so long since I've actually felt clean," Yona grumbled, shivering as she splashed herself with cold river water. It'd been a few days since the battle at Hiryuu Castle, and the group was currently wandering away from Kouka's capital while they decided on their next course of action. When they'd stumbled upon the river, Yona had all but jumped into the freezing water and begged for the girls to be allowed to bathe first.

Ezra frowned. "But we're bathing right now." She leaned over, washing the gritty soup Yun had made out of her hair.

Yona was jealous of how easily her friend seemed to adjust to the chilly water.

"Bathing in a river and bathing in a bath are two different things!" Yona complained. "I miss hot water and steam and nice-smelling perfumes..." The fiery-haired princess trailed off, her expression clouding over. "I sounded like a spoiled princess just then, didn't I?"

Ezra laughed. "Just a little." She finished washing out her midnight hair and sent Yona a wink over her shoulder. "But I won't hold it against you. If I'd ever had a hot bath, I imagine I'd miss it, too."

Yona froze in the middle of lathering soap on her shivering arms. "You've never had a hot bath?"

"Nope," Ezra quipped.

"We need to fix that!" Yona exclaimed, her eyes alight with disbelief. "You haven't lived until you've had a hot bath!"

Ezra raised an eyebrow. "I guess I'm a walking corpse, then."

"Come on. I need to have a word with Yun and Hak about finding a town with a bathhouse." Without another word, Yona turned and exited the stream without bothering to wash her bright red hair.

Ezra followed, entirely mystified.

~~~

"You want to what?" Hak's lips were pressed into a thin line, his eyes cold and flat. He'd heard the princess perfectly.

"I. Want. To. Go. To. A. Bathhouse," Yona said slowly, emphasizing every single word. Her bright violet eyes were fierce and determined. "So we need to find a town that has one!"

Hak frowned as he glanced from Yona the Ezra. The latter shrugged helplessly in response to his questioning gaze. "What brought this on?"

"Ez has never had a hot bath before!" Yona said hotly, standing on her tiptoes as if that would bring her closer to Hak's towering height.

The general only lifted an unimpressed eyebrow. "And?"

Yona's lips pursed in a small pout. "And," she insisted, "I want to take her to one."

"No can do," Hak said, shaking his head. "We can't go into a town large enough to have a bathhouse. We're trying to stay away from attention, remember?"

"Just Ez and I can go!" Yona suggested, grabbing Ezra's arm. "I can wear a cloak to hide my face and hair, and Ez isn't recognizable. Plus, she can protect me!"

"I'll feed you to the wolves," Ezra said impassively.

"Not helping!" Yona hissed, lightly swatting her friend's shoulder.

Jaeha let out a small chuckle. The others had gathered around, curious to see what Hak and Yona were fighting about. Ezra met Shinah's gaze and gave a helpless smile, shrugging in response to the question she knew he was silently asking.

She didn't understand why Yona was so insistent on this matter, either.

Hak's blue eyes flicked from Yona to Ezra and back again. "Nope," he finally said, crossing his arms. "Not happening."

"Hak!" Yona complained. "You don't understand!"

"No," Hak agreed. "I don't."

Beside Yona, Yun let out a sigh. "Let them go, Thunder Beast," he ordered, butting into their argument.

Hak turned to Yun, eyes wide with disbelief. "What?"

"Yona isn't going to shut up about this for weeks if we don't let her go. Besides, you know Ezra is more than capable of taking care of your scatterbrained princess."

"Hey!" Yona protested. "I am not scatterbrained!"

"Oh, really?" asked Hak, Yun, and Ezra simultaneously.

Yona pouted once more. "No fair. I feel attacked."

Ezra laughed while Hak rolled his eyes. "You really feel that strongly about this?" he asked Yona.

Yona nodded vigorously. "Of course."

His gaze shifted to Ezra. "And you?"

Ezra shrugged. "I guess I'm curious."

Hak rolled his eyes and let out a deep sigh. "Fine. You can go."

"Yay!" Yona squealed, jumping with joy. She grabbed Ezra's hands and swung them around. "We get to go to a bathhouse!"

Ezra grinned. "You're really excited about this, aren't you?"

Yona nodded, eyes bright. "Yes! Yun, where's the nearest one?"

"Hmm..." Yun frowned in thought. "We're in the eastern Sky Lands right now, so I think we'll have to travel a bit more to find a town large enough."

Ezra's dark brows drew together. "Will that be a problem?"

"Well, we have no plans with the exception of resting after that whole Hiryuu Castle fiasco, so I think this actually fits pretty well with our objectives right now," Yun decided.

"Can't wait!" Yona punched the air in excitement. "This is gonna be so much fun, Ez!"

"Sure thing," Ezra agreed with a smile. Her fiery-haired friend's excitement was contagious.

~~~

A few days later, Yona and Ezra strolled through the streets of a wealthier town on the outskirts of the Sky Tribe's lands. A sizable central market had gained the interest of traveling merchants some years back. They had moved to the town to sell their quality goods, and the resulting influx of both buyers and sellers created a flourishing economy which brought about all the wealth and prosperity that Yona and Ezra had come to enjoy.

"There it is!" Yona squealed, pointing towards a sign that labeled its building as a bathhouse. She jumped up and down in excitement, grabbing Ezra's arm in a tight grasp.

Ezra smiled tightly. "Let's go in before you attract more attention from the passerby." The dark-haired warrior shifted uneasily, feeling all of her weapons rub almost uncomfortably against her skin. Ezra was strolling through the wealthy, peaceful town armed to the teeth, as per (unsurprisingly) Hak's request.

"Six daggers, Hak?" Ezra had asked in disbelief as he'd shoved her weapons at her. "It isn't normal for a woman to carry one dagger in a peaceful place, let alone six!" And this was in addition to the shuriken she always kept tucked up her sleeves! Was he crazy?

"Wear a robe to cover them," Hak said impassively.

"But it'll be hot!" she complained. He'd only raised an eyebrow at her, his expression unwavering.

He wasn't going to back down.

Ezra had taken the weapons with a resigned sigh.

So now she was strolling casually through the town with two daggers at her hips, two strapped around her thighs, one in her boot, and one in an individual sheath tucked uncomfortably into the waistband of her trousers. Ezra felt a bead of sweat drip down her back, overheated as she was underneath the large robe she was wearing to conceal the weapons.

"Let's go!" Yona had made an effort to lower the volume of her voice, but her eyes still sparkled with excitement from underneath the hood of her cloak.

Ezra ushered her towards the door, hoping to avoid any more stares, before she stopped short.

"A dog!" the battle-hardened warrior exclaimed excitedly, a brilliant smile spreading across her face. There was a dog with a silky golden coat sitting beside the bathhouse door with its tongue out, watching the people walk by with bright eyes. "Here, puppy!" Ezra crooned, crouching to pet the animal.

The dog happily received her, jumping at her in excitement to try to lick her face. Ezra laughed as she stumbled backwards, burying her hands into the pup's silky coat.

"Crap!" Ezra yelped. The movement had jostled the uncomfortable knife tucked into her waistband, and the weapon fell to the dirt floor with a small thump. She reached for it, but a certain golden-haired animal beat her to it.

"Come back!" Ezra called as the dog scampered around the corner with her dagger clenched between its teeth.

Yona frowned. "That's not good." She turned to look at Ezra. "Should we... chase it?"

Somehow, Ezra doubted that chasing after a dog with a dagger in its mouth was the best way to stay incognito in an unfamiliar town. She shook her head.

"Let's just go in," she sighed. Daggers were lost all the time; she'd just buy a new one at some point to replace it. It wasn't as if she had a shortage of weapons, anyways.

"Alright!" Yona cheered, pushing open the door.

Ezra was immediately met with a humid cloud of steam as she stepped into the bathhouse. She began sweating in earnest beneath the heavy robe Hak had forced her into.

After quietly speaking with the slim receptionist, Yona led the way to a changing room where she immediately began stripping off her clothes.

Ezra did the same, gratefully shrugging off the heavy robe.

Yona halted in the middle of untying the obi at her waist. "Uh, Ez... are we going to war?" Ezra glanced up to find Yona's eyes lingering on the many knives strapped to her body.

She gave Yona a pointed look. "Hak," she said by way of explanation.

Yona immediately gave a roll of her brilliant violet eyes. "Of course."

Ezra finished taking off her clothes, carefully tucking her knives away in the fabric. She was especially careful with the slim stiletto knife she usually kept in her boot; since it had no sheath of its own, she folded it into her robe before placing all of her clothes on the shelf. "Ready," she announced.

"Come on!" Yona said excitedly, grabbing her hand. The princess led her to a spacious room that billowed even more steam. The bamboo floors felt sticky and warm beneath their feet. A few women lounged in the bath, paying no attention to the two of them as they entered.

Yona dipped her toes into the water before moaning in bliss. "So warm!" she sighed happily. She immediately sank her whole body into the water, leaning her head back against the rim of the large bath.

Ezra hesitantly took a step into the bath, gasping slightly when the warm water licked at her feet. "Whoa," she mumbled, stepping fully into the bath. She waded deeper, sinking in until the water was at her nose.

It felt incredible.

Ezra blew bubbles in the bath, then raised her head out of the water to laugh happily.

Yona watched her with a soft smile on her face. "I knew you were cute, Ez," she teased, her violet eyes glimmering with amusement and fondness.

Ezra stuck her tongue out at her best friend before dipping her head beneath the water to wet her dark hair.

"Yona, you were right," Ezra sighed when she resurfaced. "This is the most amazing thing I've ever experienced in my life."

"Told you," Yona laughed as she ran her fingers through her short red hair. "Come here, let me wash your back."

Ezra happily complied.

They'd only been in the bath for maybe twenty minutes when it all went wrong.

Ezra ran a soapy rag over Yona's thin shoulders, scrubbing away the months' worth of dirt and filth that bathing in rivers never seemed to get rid of.

"You're scrubbing me raw!" Yona complained. "My skin's going to be all red!"

"Hush your complaining," Ezra scolded. "I'm getting you clean!"

"WHOSE IS THIS?!"

The large, booming voice coming from the entrance to the women's baths startled Ezra so badly that she jumped, accidently smacking Yona in the head with the rag. They looked up with wide eyes, Yona's short red hair now a soapy mess.

A rotund woman with a lined face and graying hair stood on the threshold to the room, holding up the slim stiletto knife that Ezra had tucked so carefully into her clothes just twenty minutes before. Her aging face was thunderously angry.

A few moments of stunned silence passed.

"WHOSE KNIFE IS THIS?!" the woman boomed once more, her cheeks reddening all the way to her ears in fury. "WHO DARED TO BRING THIS INTO MY BATHHOUSE?!"

Ezra gulped. She'd once charged into battle against pirate mercenaries armed with just a single knife, but somehow speaking up at this moment felt so much scarier. "Um, that's mine, ma'am."

The woman turned her beady eyes to Ezra's face. "This is your knife, girl?"

"Y-yes." Ezra hated how her voice cracked. She was a warrior! Why was she stuttering in the face of this bathhouse owner's fury?

The woman's lips thinned into a single line. "YOU SIMPERING SIMPLETON!" she screamed. "I WAS CLEANING UP THE CHANGING ROOMS WHEN THIS CONFOUNDED THING," she shook the knife that she was holding madly in the air, "FELL AND KNICKED MY FOOT!"

Ezra glanced down in alarm to see a small cut on the side of the woman's foot, oozing blood onto the bamboo floor. "I-I'm very sorry," she stammered.

The woman's face turned purple. "SORRY?! WHAT KIND OF WAR-MONGERING WALNUT GIRL BRINGS SO MANY KNIVES INTO A BATHHOUSE?"

Walnut girl?

"I--"

"SAVE YOUR EXPLANATIONS! GET OUT OF MY ESTABLISHMENT!"

Ezra grew red with embarrassment as she realized that the other occupants of the bathhouse were staring at her in bewilderment. "Yes ma'am," she said quietly, stepping out of the bath.

Just then, a familiar golden-haired dog nudged its way past the murderously angry woman in the doorway to enter the bathing room. Ezra's eyes widened when she realized the animal was still carrying her knife between its teeth.

"Hanzo!" the bathhouse owner snapped. "Get out of this room!"

The dog turned, allowing the woman full view of the weapon in its mouth.

The woman's face, which had cooled from purple to a brilliant tomato red, grew darker once more. "HOW DID YOU GET THAT KNIFE?"

"Er--" Ezra stammered.

The woman's eyes turned towards Ezra, filled with an almost comical amount of disbelief and fury. "Don't you dare tell me--"

Ezra immediately stepped forward, swiping the knife from the dog's mouth in one smooth motion before hiding the weapon sheepishly behind her back.

The woman's face turned an alarming shade of purple. "GET OUT OF MY BATHHOUSE, YOU IDIOTIC WARRIOR CHILD! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR NOODLE-LIKE EXISTENCE IN MY ESTABLISHMENT EVER AGAIN! YOU'RE A YELLOW-BELLIED, FOUL-MOUTHED, RIDICULOUS LITTLE COCKROACH! YOU--"

She was still screaming insults at the top of her lungs as Ezra darted past her, quickly snatching the stiletto from the woman's hand as she passed.

When they got back to the changing rooms, Yona immediately began struggling to put on her kimono. Ezra's eyes darted around the room desperately until they lit on a rack of bathrobes at the back.

"Don't bother with your kimono! We need to get out of here!" Ezra hissed at Yona as she gathered up her bundle of clothes and weapons, quickly making sure that she still retained all six (six! Why did Hak have to do this to her?!) knives she'd brought. "Grab a robe!"

"Ez--"

"Just do it!" Ezra snapped, snatching a robe from its hook. She quickly donned it over her naked body, tying it shut and gripping her bundle closely to her chest. "Come on!"

They raced outside, still being chased by a line of increasingly creative insults from the bathhouse owner behind them. The last one that stuck in Ezra's mind was toe-licking retarded gecco. Whatever that meant.

Once they were in the street, Ezra realized just what a strange sight they must have made; the warrior was barefoot, wearing nothing but a robe, and clutching a pile of clothes to her chest while Yona wore her bathrobe over a slip she'd managed to put on before Ezra had shouted at her. Yona, at least, had her slippers on her feet.

"That..." Yona gasped, out of breath. "That was..."

"I have no words," Ezra moaned, closing her eyes. "Let's just go."

"Stop right there!"

In the name of the Dragon Gods, what now?!

Ezra suppressed an exasperated groan as she turned to face a pair of men wearing the uniform of Sky Tribe officials. She clutched her bundle even tighter to her chest, suddenly made very aware of the miniscule amount of clothing she was currently wearing.

"Is there a problem, officers?" she asked breathlessly, blowing a chunk of dark wet hair out of her face.

Beside her, Yona snorted at her audacity.

"State your business." The man who stepped forward was trying desperately to appear calm and collected, but Ezra's sharp eyes noticed the slight blush that creeped up his cheeks.

"As you can probably see," Ezra snapped, "my friend and I are trying to get home. If you'll excuse us, we'll be on our way." She turned to leave, but the man's voice stopped her once more.

"Halt!" he called. Ezra glanced at him over her shoulder, her eyes flaring with her temper. "Do you realize that, um..." the man trailed off, his face growing even redder. "Um, well, brothels have been... they've... er... been made illegal here..."

And just like that, Ezra's fragile temper snapped.

"You think I'm a harlot?!" the girl screamed, her amethyst eyes nearly glowing with fury.

Beside her, Yona glanced around in alarm, realizing that they were drawing in a rather sizable crowd of curious passerby. "Um, Ez--"

But Ezra wasn't listening. She dropped her bundle of clothing, keeping her grip only on her stiletto and the dagger that Hanzo the dog had stolen from her. With a wordless yell of pure rage, she charged forward, one knife in each hand.

And Yona could do nothing but stand back and watch the absolute chaos unfold.

~~~

Hak was utterly, completely, and one-thousand percent speechless. "What... how... what even..." He continued spluttering, his words blurring together into meaningless sentences.

"HOW THE HELL DID YOU TWO MANAGE TO STIR UP SO MUCH TROUBLE IN SO LITTLE TIME?" Yun thundered at them, making up for Hak's nonsensical mutterings. "IF WE HADN'T SENT JAEHA TO CHECK ON YOU, DO YOU REALIZE WHAT COULD'VE--"

"I don't know how this happened!" Ezra screamed right back at him. "We were acting perfectly normal, relaxing in the water, but then a fat lady started screaming at us, a dog named Hanzo ran through the room carrying my dagger in its mouth, we got chased out, and I ended up starting a fight with some officials while wearing nothing but a bathrobe! I swear, it wasn't my fault!"

The entire group stared at her in speechless disbelief.

"How... the hell... is that not your fault?!" Yun snapped.

"I am the victim here!" Ezra wailed. "I didn't escape tongue lashings from a fat bathhouse owner and some officials who thought I was a harlot just to get one from you, too, Yun!"

Yun snapped his mouth shut. He was wavering between screaming at Ezra in anger, standing stock-still in complete disbelief, and dissolving into laughter.

He settled on the last.

Yun began laughing as he'd never laughed before. Tears streamed down his face as he clutched at his stomach, sinking to the ground when his legs no longer felt fit to support him.

One by one the others joined, until even Ezra herself sat snorting on the floor in mirth. The warrior gasped, trying to take air into her deprived lungs. Her face was wet with tears of laughter.

"I..." Yun gasped, "have never heard... such a ridiculous story before!"

"Only Ezra," Kija snorted, wiping at his eyes. "Only she could do something like this!"

"I'll be telling this story for decades," Hak guffawed, his arms wrapped around his stomach. He was laughing too hard to even consider how Yona may have been placed in harm's way by their reckless shenanigans.

Even Shinah sat on the ground, cackling nearly silently to himself in amusement.

"Zeno wishes he'd been there!" Zeno chuckled, waving his hands wildly through the air.

Jaeha wiped tears of amusement from his eyes. "You'll become even more legendary than us dragon warriors, Ezra," he told her with a wink. He'd hardly believed his eyes when he'd watched the scene from the air; Ezra had been flying towards the Sky Tribe officials with a dagger in each hand, wearing only a bathrobe that was creeping dangerously up her thigh. He'd been tempted to tease her about her skimpy attire, but the madness in her expression had dissuaded him from the thought almost immediately.

Ezra couldn't even reply. She could only laugh harder, tears streaming down her face to drip onto the dirt below.

This is some legend I'll leave behind, she thought to herself.

She glanced at Yona in a lull in the amusement and smiled. The moment of clarity only lasted for a second before they dissolved back into laughter.