
Elliot
Once I finished the dishes, I headed upstairs, intending to go straight to my room to grab my stuff but paused in my tracks when I heard chatter coming from Zara's room. Her door was left slightly ajar, so it wouldn't be hard to listen in. I told myself I wasn't going to, that there was no need to eavesdrop like Harley always did, and yet I found myself walking towards the door.
"Maybe," Zara said to something Harley had said.
"So are you good at giving advice?" Harley asked Zara.
"Umm, depends," Zara told her. "What's up?"
"So I have a friend," Harley began, "Let's call him Ed. Ed has a girlfriend, Jill, but he doesn't have a strong connection with his girlfriend. Like, they're not compatible but he's too blind to notice. But Ed has a friend, we'll call this friend Zoe. Zoe and Ed have a clear strong connection, and I think Zoe likes Ed and Ed likes Zoe but he isn't making a move because he's still with Jill," she told Zara then sighed. "Isn't Ed just the dumbest person on this planet?"
It wasn't hard to read into the meaning of what Harley was saying, considering the fact that she was using the first letter of our names to name the characters. I just hoped Zara didn't pick up on it too.
"No, I don't think Ed is the dumbest person on this planet. Maybe he's just confused?" Zara considered. "Give it time, he'll figure out how he feels for the two, and he'll make a decision based on his feelings."
Harley nodded, "I sure hope so."
Zara suddenly grinned and laughed softly, and I caught myself staring at the curve of her lips as she smiled. "Harley, how dumb do you think I am on a scale of 1 to 10?"
Harley blinked, caught off guard by the sudden question, "umm, 4?"
"Then did you really think I wouldn't pick up on what you were saying?" She asked her. "If I am right and Ed is who I think he is then I think he'd better stay with Jill."
"I don't think so," Harley disagreed, shaking her head. "I know you're probably concerned about the whole incest thing but you guys are second cousins, you're not closely related."
"We're still related."
"Barely," Harley mumbled. "For all you know, you might not be related at all."
"But we are."
"And if you weren't?" Harley prodded. "If you weren't related, would you still want Ed to be with Jill?"
Zara opened her mouth and then closed it again. Her brows furrowed and she looked to the side, deep in thought. Watching her, I felt expectant. I didn't know why, or what I wanted to hear her say, but I felt expectant, waiting for her answer just as Harley was.
"I don't know," she finally said, and I questioned the disappointment I felt.
"What do you mean you don't know?"
"I just don't. Plus, Elliot loves Jess," Zara said, using our real names. "So it doesn't matter what I feel."
"But what if he didn't love her?"
"But he does," Zara stated. "And it would still be weird."
"Weird how?"
"If you weren't related to Elliot, would you be interested in him?" Zara questioned.
"Gross! No!" Harley gagged.
Zara smiled again, "see? It would still be weird."
"Yeah but—"
"Hush now, Harley," Zara cut her off. "Can we not talk about something else? Such as someone you have feelings for."
Harley slowly pouted her lips, "what makes you think I have feelings for anyone?"
"There's no way there's no one."
"You're right," Harley smiled then took out her phone. "But first..."
She started doing something on her phone and it took me a second too long to realise what it was when my phone suddenly started ringing. There was no point in rushing to take it out of my pocket. I knew exactly who was calling me.
"Rookie mistake," Harley commented out loud, turning to look at the door. "Come on in, little eavesdropper, or have you already heard all you wanted?"
I sighed and opened the door but didn't cross the threshold. "I wasn't eavesdropping," I said despite the obvious. "I just came to say goodbye."
"Goodbye?" Zara asked. "Don't you mean goodnight?"
"No. I mean goodbye."
She moved to the edge of the bed so that her legs were hanging down the edge. "Where are you going?"
"He's going back to his apartment," Harley told Zara before I could.
"Oh," Zara lowered her eyes for a second. "Why?"
"I've just got a lot of work to catch up on," I told her.
"You can't just do that at your office? Or here?"
I could, but I still said, "No."
"Oh," she repeated. "Okay then."
"Okay then," I echoed.
"See you later," she said then she smiled.
But it didn't reach her eyes.
****
It had been a couple of days since I left the house to stay in my apartment. On the days when I picked Harley up from school, I also picked Zara up from work, so it wasn't like I didn't see them altogether, I just didn't see them constantly.
It was better this way. I much preferred it this way. I was less confused in terms of whatever it was I was feeling this way.
Whenever I was with Zara, I made sure to speak about things that would help her regain her memory, subtly bringing up her friends, the trip to the beach and as much information about her as I knew. The sooner she remembered, the better. She could go back to living her normal life, back in her city and in her own home, wherever that was. She may even be able to go back to work if she explained the situation to her bosses, but if not, she could always find another job.
The only thing I was afraid of and concerned about was the grief that she would face, but other than that I thought that she would prefer to go back to her regular life rather than stay with my family and work at a café.
I didn't stay for dinner after dropping Zara and Harley off at home but went back to my apartment. I was planning on having leftovers for dinner, but when I entered my apartment Jess was seated at the dining table with a plastic bag.
"Seafood?" She asked, gesturing to the plastic bag.
"Sure," I smiled for her sake.
I was one of those people who wasn't a fan of seafood. I could do sushi, but not prawns and octopus, and I had no doubt that was exactly what Jess had bought. I ate it all though, for her sake, and because I couldn't stand wasting food, especially not food that cost a lot of money.
"So I was thinking," Jess began, patting her lips with a serviette. "Our wedding is in less than 2 months and I want everything to go perfectly. I've hired a professional wedding choreographer to choreograph our wedding dance so we'll be going to practice on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays leading up to the wedding."
"A professional wedding choreographer?" I asked. "I thought we agreed that we weren't going to do anything too complex and difficult."
"Yeah, well I changed my mind," Jess said. "Plus, you're a good dancer, you'll pick up on the steps within the first week."
"Jess—"
"I'm not done," she cut me off, and it was then that I found myself doing something I'd never done. I found myself comparing her to Zara. While Jess had no sense of humour, was full of herself and cared about nothing and no one other than herself, Zara was hilarious, selfless and always tried to put the needs of others before hers. She was always joyful and quirky. She was childish yet mature in her own way. She always listened intently when I spoke, and most of all, she made me feel things that Jess had never once made me feel.
"I know you said 400 people was more than enough to come to our wedding," Jess continued, and I blinked, shocked by my thoughts. "But I thought it was too little so I invited an extra 200 people. Is that okay?"
"No, Jess, it's not," I told her, careful to mask the irritation I was feeling. "If you wanted more you should have talked to me first before going ahead and making a decision. This is our wedding but you keep ignoring what I say and making your own decisions. You need to talk to me, Jess."
"I am talking to you."
"You need to talk to me beforehand."
"Alright, fine, next time."
"You always say that."
"Well this time I mean it, okay?" She leaned over the table and kissed me. And I felt nothing. That spoke volumes, didn't it? Jess' kiss didn't make me feel anything and yet simple contact with Zara made me feel so many different things. "I really do love you."
I smiled at her, keeping my appearance steady. On the surface I was fine, but my mind was racing. I had come to stay in my apartment to avoid Zara, and yet all I could do was think of her even though I was trying not to.
"Should we clean up?"
"Yeah, go ahead," Jess said, holding her fingers out towards me. "I got a manicure recently and I don't want to ruin them. You understand right?"
"Not really, no."
She sighed, "yeah, well that's because you're not a girl. If you were, you'd understand. Plus, I brought the food so you can do the washing."
I clenched my jaw, but I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to argue. I cleared the table and made to wash the dishes, and during that time my mind wandered. To Zara. Again.
I thought of the way it was so easy to talk to her, the way she wasn't full of herself, the way she could take jokes as well as dish them out, and the way she wasn't afraid of getting her hands dirty. Like Jess, Zara was grossed out by red meat what with all the blood, but unlike Jess, Zara still helped Harley in the kitchen when she asked. Zara knew that Harley only ever asked for her help to laugh at and tease her, but she still did it, and she always made sure to get Harley back afterwards.
It was weird knowing how well Zara got along with my family. She treated Harley like a sister, she was so comfortable with me, and she even seemed to have a good relationship with my parents. She had been living with us for about a month now and she was closer to my family than Jess, who they'd known for years now.
Once I finished the dishes I turned to see Jess grabbing her bag to leave.
"I should go if I want to get my beauty sleep," she said. "Unless I can stay over tonight?"
"Sure, I'll take the couch then."
She sighed, "your bed is big enough for two."
"I know that," I told her. "But if you're staying over I'll take the couch."
"You're no fun," she pouted. "I'll go home then, that couch isn't long enough for you to get a good night's sleep."
"Is that you being considerate?" I asked, surprised.
She smiled, "of course, I care about you, you know that." She let her purse rest in the crook of her elbow then came and wrapped her arms around me. "I can't wait to marry you."
I only hugged her back in response.
****
An incessant vibration appeared in my dreams.
I felt myself groan and roll over, and it took me several moments to become conscious of the fact that the vibration was coming from my phone.
I reached over and grabbed my phone from the bedside table. I squinted at the screen and swiped without checking to see who was calling.
"Hello?" I asked groggily.
"Elliot," I registered the voice as Harley's.
"Harley, what—"
"You have to come home," she said, and something about her voice made me sit up.
"What's wrong?" I asked urgently.
"It's Zara."
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