Present day

Sanyu made herself a cup of green tea as she pulled her robe closer to her body; the december chill making her shiver despite of the central heating in full force...she went outside in the living room and looked out from floor to ceiling glass walls of their apartment in New York...if someone had told her a year ago that she would be relocating to New York, she would have laughed it off

She sat down on the comfy settee near the window and gazed down at the beautiful sight that Central Park made in winter...with the Christmas lights on and stars twinkling delightfully on the tall christmas trees, her thoughts went back to the day that had changed everything in her life...the day that had started with being a joyous one only to end up being the saddest of their lives.

She looked at the large portrait of her sister that hung on one of the walls in the living room...her smiling face, dimpled cheeks and twinkling eyes looking down at Sanyu who sat with tears welling in her eyes...she missed her sister...missed her more than anything! And if it wasn't for her sister's baby...she probably would not have been sitting here today...in her new life...as Mrs Randhir Singh Shekhawat...a name that was rightfully her sisters...not her's.

One Year ago...

It had been nearly six months since the accident and Sanaya's demise...Randhir and Advait and their driver had survived the ill-fated accident with minor injuries since they had been sitting in the front...but Sanaya had left them all on that day...Randhir had turned into a shell of a man from who he once was...he had left Advait with his parents and sister and had left for the US to get things in order there...he had come back a few weeks later, taking indefinite leave from work as he had to decide on what was best for Advait...

The first thing everyone told him was to come back to India...but he had refused to even think about that...he had told everyone that he was capable of taking care of his son and would not be coming back anytime soon...he had even discussed working from home so that he could be a full time father for Advait...his company had agreed on his request, since he was one of their highly respected and senior employee...so this was the best solution for them.

During his time in India, Sanyu had visited the Shekhawat house regularly...she had been so taken with Advait that she felt as if he were her own son instead of her sister's...Advait too looked forward to his maasi's visit as she probably reminded him of his mother...this was truly appreciated by Randhir who was indebted to Sanyu for her involvement in his son's life...he knew that Advait missed his mother's warmth and Sanyu provided the same to him whenever she came to their house...he also enjoyed her company as she always tried to engage him in something or the other to keep him occupied...to keep him from falling into that abject depression that had come over him after Sanaya's death

No one had probed Randhir after that day about his plans and had agreed with his solution of working from home...but looking at Advait's growing bond with Sanyu had brought about a thought in everyone's mind...of Randhir's remarriage... Advait needed a mother and who better than Sanyukta who understood both the father and son so well? Even Kishore and Anju had thought that this was good idea and looking at the way Sanyu adored Advait, they thought it would be for the best...as it is, they could not see anyone else taking their Sanaya's place in their grandson's life.

It was on one of those days, when Sanyu had come to play with Advait...she was going to take him along with her for the weekend, when loud noises from the bedroom upstairs caught her attention...she could hear Randhir's mother and his sister talking to him...she inched a few feet closer to hear the only sentence that caused her to gasp in surprise "No ma...I will not marry Sanyukta....period...I do not want anymore discussion after this." he had said in such an enraged voice that it had shook her to the core

She had quickly left from there and gone to the kitchen to calm her nerves...they were planning to marry her with Randhir? Why?...her gaze shifted to little Advait who had now started walking slowly...his pudgy legs kept tripping over each other making him fall and then giggle before getting up...she wiped the odd tears that had somehow made their way to her eyes before picking him up and making him sit in her lap...she knew why...it was for Advait.

At that same time Randhir had come down to find Sanyu and Advait playing...he had given Sanyukta an intense stare before completely ignoring her and walking out the door...she had let the tears fall past her cheeks only to have Advait's soft hands wipe them away...she had kissed him on both his cheeks and hugged him tightly before saying a quick goodbye to the rest of the Shekhawat family.

That evening her parents had asked her the same question...they had told her about their concerns regarding Advait's future and how a step-mother may not love him as much as she would...they also knew the equation she shared with Randhir and that given time, everything will come together...she had asked them to give her time and had gone back to her room to play with Advait...that night she slept with him in her arms, as she watched him peacefully next to her...she knew she could not let him go...he had made a place in her heart but things weren't so simple...plus Randhir did not want to marry her...so there was no question of her agreeing.

Next day morning, she had woken up to Advait hitting her softly on her cheeks and mumbling something...on further listening to him she had understood what he was trying to say 'Mamma'...she burst out crying frightening the child who too started crying along with her...she held him tightly till both their sobbing subsided...she had made up her mind.

"Are you sure you know what you are doing Sanyukta? There is no going back..." Randhir had asked her the day after when she had come to drop Advait back...Randhir had been told of Sanyu's acceptance of the proposal making him confused and angry at the same time...he had roughly spoken to her only for her to stand up to him and speak in a clear manner "Yes, I am sure...but you should know that I want this marriage for Advait only...I can't live without him...so for his sake, I have said a yes" she said with a pain in her heart, lest he thinks otherwise...she knew he did not want to marry her and her ego and love for Advait would not let her accept the fact that she wasn't just marrying him for Advait

"Thank you for clearing that...if this is your final decision that I have no problem with it...we will marry as soon as we can since I have to go back to the States...your visa will take some time and you can join when it comes through..." he said as Sanyu tried to reign in her tears... "Fine...but Advait will stay with me till then...i'll come along with him" she said as Randhir hesitated for a bit before nodding "Ok, but i'll come to get you both...the visa process will take a month at least...but i'll try and fasten it if I can..." he said as Sanyukta nodded mutely

He looked at her drawn face before adding softly "Please be sure you want this Sanyukta...I don't want you to live with a regret...don't you have someone in your life?" he said to her as she smiled at him "I am sure Randhir and No I don't have anyone else in my life...I love Advait...and I can't stay without him...also, if its ok...i'd like to have a court marriage...since it's only been six months since..." she added to which Randhir nodded "Off course...but our families would want a small traditional ceremony as well...we can have that in a temple with just our close ones" he said as Sanyu nodded...drawing a final line at the decisions made

And thus two months later, Sanyu and Advait had come to New York...Randhir had shifted out of their house in Jersey and bought an apartment in downtown New York in the time he had been gone after the marriage...they had signed the marriage papers followed by the small temple ceremony making Sanyukta a Shekhawat bahu...keeping in mind the circumstances of their wedding and the recent death in the family, there were no other rituals performed...Vidhushi had kept Advait with her on their first night, leaving them both awkwardly staring at the bed

"You can take the bed...I'll sleep on the recliner" Randhir had said to which Sanyu had shook her head "No Randhir...we are mature adults...i'm not someone who would be scandalized if we slept in the same bed...plus you are my husband now...if only in name, but still" she had said...missing the look of hurt in his eyes...he had simply nodded and changed into his nightwear before going to sleep...Sanyu too had unpacked and changed before sleeping next to him...and that was how they had been till now

The only difference was that Advait slept between them...but from the last two weeks...he had started sleeping in his own bed; leaving Randhir and Sanyu once again at odd's in the night...but otherwise their relationship had been getting better and better...there were still times when things were still awkward but in the months they had been married, they had become good friends

Sanyu had taken up an MBA course at NYU Stern with Randhir's help who had encouraged her for it...she knew that she could not work right away and whiling the entire day indoors was not for her...so she had applied for the one year MBA program at the University, for which she had only two hours of course work daily keeping her free to spend time with Advait afters...Randhir had hired a nanny to look after him while Sanyu went to university

The arrangement worked perfectly for them as Sanyukta made new friends and started once again finding a new meaning to life...evenings would be great with Randhir playing with Advait while she cooked for them...sometimes they called for take-away when Sanyukta had her paper's to write and Randhir too helped out with Advaits things when she got busy with term papers...on weekends Randhir made sure they went somewhere new with Advait and sometimes even planned weekend trips away for the three of them...Life was perfect for Sanyu except the fact that she had hopelessly fallen in love with her husband...

It wasn't something new...she knew she always had this pull towards him...even when he had come to see her sister on that day...but she had kept her foolish dreams aside...it was a taboo to even think about your sister's fiance in that way...the shiver of excitement she had felt when Sanaya had jokingly told her to marry Randhir instead had cemented the fact that she had feelings for him...something which was forbidden and should never be thought of again

But now, things had changed...he was her husband and being in close proximity for nearly a year had made her yearn for things she had hoped to have with her husband one day...yes he took care of her and protected her...and maybe was fond of her as well...it showed in many of the things he did for her...like bringing her favorite flowers...or ordering a hindi flick from the library on movie nights that they had decided to have every thursday...even sometimes cooking breakfast when she was busy with Advait...he was perfect...but he did not want her

Not the way she wanted him...her heart always sped when he was near her...she could hardly sleep with him lying so close to her...whenever he touched her, either accidentally or just in general, she felt such warmth and pleasure that it made her yearn for more...but every single time she thought of finally telling him how she felt about him, she remembered that day when he had disagreed to marry her...or that look that had passed between him and her sister on Advait's birth...he was in love with her sister...had always been...and that could never change...not when her smiling picture reminded her everyday of the fact that this was rightfully her place...reminded her daily about her unrequited love.

Present Day

She felt a tear trickle past her cheek as she sniffed and wiped it off... "Sanyu?" she heard his voice from behind her and got up quickly to pass him a smile "Arre Randhir...why are you awake?...did you want something?" she asked him trying to be her sunny self again but he came closer to her, making her flick the last bit of moistness from her eyes "You were crying?" he asked her as she shrugged and shook her head

"What? No...something must have gone in my eye...lets go sleep" she said trying to change the topic and go back to their room when he held her wrist, making her turn towards him...her body reacting once again violently to his touch "Hold on Sanyukta...were you crying because you were thinking about her?" Randhir asked her as she sighed and turned towards him...she knew who the 'her' was that he was referring to

"I miss her..." she said sadly as he left her wrist taking all the warmth from her body...he turned away from her as she felt her eyes once again prick looking at his rigid stance...he will always love her sister...he will always be her sister's husband...she is just a friend for him...and it should remain that way...she had to comfort him in his grief...she went towards him and laid her hand on his shoulder...making his body tense under her touch "I know you miss her too...its always difficult to let go of loved ones" she said with a sad smile as Randhir turned around with hurt evident in his eyes

She looked at him in confusion as he sighed and once again held her hand...he led her to the same settee she was sitting on earlier and made her sit next to him "Sanyu...there is a lot you don't know...about me and Sanaya" he said as Sanyu looked at him with concern "About what?" she asked him as he took a deep breath and ran both his hands through his thick wavy hair

"Sanyu...I don't know how to explain this...but let me tell you in short...I guess I should have told you this long time ago...probably even before we got married...but I never wanted to bring more grief to you and the family" he said, as she squeezed his hand that was still holding her "What is it Randhir? You are scaring me" she said as Randhir looked at her...his eyes full of intensity as his gaze hovered over her face...before coming to rest again on her eyes "Sanaya and I were heading back to India for a divorce"