I miss you

"Oh God, Oh God, Oh God," she fussed while running from launderette to bedroom with clean sheets. Not that they would stay that way long once he got here. The house work was just a ruse anyway. She had more nervous energy than she knew what to do with. "Maybe I'll work out," she thought and burst out. Yeah, unlikely, she'd leave that to him.

They had only been apart for 10 days. It was kind of a tiny time-out compared to the way they had courted. A few months in the same country, but not city. A few days under the California sky. A meet up in New York here and there. They were both always moving. It felt like forever though, because they'd been joined at the hip for more than a week when they had gone to his hometown.

That trip was a total trip. He always talked in circles and it took him forever to get out a sentence in his super low down drawl. Except during sex. She was distracting herself. She needed a Xanax.

"So, I was thinking, um, about us, um, maybe taking a trip. Um, I mean, if you are free. I, um, have to be in Manchester and I was going to stay with my mum, so maybe, um, if you are free, like I said, you can come?" she remembered how he looked at her hopefully while shrugging like it was no big deal. He couldn't feign nonchalance at all. She liked how much he cared, about everything. It reminded her of Rieder.

So she found herself on a plane with people whose names she had heard slip from his mouth familiarly and got off into a chilly overcast day before ducking into an SUV that fit all of them. She was so nervous on the way, as the scenery changed from urban to country she found herself biting her lip and singing dully under her breath.

"What's that your humming?" He whispered to her.

"Just some old song," she dodged as his breath ghosted over her shoulder. Her reactions to him were why she was making this journey. He made her shiver then laugh loudly in the space of a few minutes frequently. He laughed at her jokes, not just at how goofy she was. He genuinely thought she was witty. So, even though she was sure she was not the girl you took home to mom, to many topless shoots and cigarettes, she'd walk into his mother's brick house and share tea in her back garden. Anything to pop the dimples.

And the trip had been a success. His mum, as he called her, had liked her. Even requested that they grab lunch alone. And she'd lost her mind and agreed to spending time with the older lady, and lady she was, without him as a buffer. And it was lovely. His mother was open and gave her no strong worded or veiled warnings and their conversation flowed. Her smiled was so similar to his that it evoked wide gins throughout the village that afternoon, some on her own face.

But after that, they both had obligations. They had been facetiming, but she missed him. She missed his boots kicked off by her door for her to fall over, missed fresh squeezed juices he tried to like half finished in her fridge, missed the dent in the pillow onethe right side of the bed, the creases on his dimpled cheeks and puffy eyes, missed missing sleep.

She checked the clock, any minute now, if his flight was on time and traffic was good. So, unlikely, maybe she should eat something. When was the last time she ate something? It had been a bit, maybe dinner yesterday. Her cigarette habit had picked up while he was gone. He'd be disappointed, slyly. She sighed.

Opening the fridge was a joke. How as she considered an adult? She laughed out loud at herself. There was a stash of takeout containers, half eaten cheese and wine. She searched for her phone to call uber eats. It would have to do, and she'd get him that dish he raved about last time when they ate in bed after painting each other with markers and took her favorite pictures ever. Those polaroids were better that her whole Dior ad. Real attraction was hard to simulate she guessed. She smiled at her lockscreen. Pictures of pictures were so platonic, a representation of a representation, of him. She forgot all of her intentions when a pic popped through of the security door downstairs.

She ran through the door, leaving it wide open, to the elevator. The ding was a starting gun and she felt more than saw him as he swept her up. Her thighs notched into the dips in his hips and she was happy for the soft surface of her couch beneath her moments later. She was thankful again moments later for the forethought she had shown in wearing a dress when he didn't even bother to tease aside her underwear, dragging them across where she was already wet and warm. The click, click, click of his zipper resounded in her ears and the pop when he pushed in could have come from that silly lollipop song.

His exhale mirrored hers and their movements slowed. "Hi," he goofed at her and popped open smiling eyes.

"Hello," she giggled back at him, his eyes closing again at the quaking of her stomach and its companion clench lower down. She leaned up and inhaled his breath before fitting her lips between his. Their first kiss had been chaste and sweet, this one was too, in opposition to the subterranean rock below their waists.

He pulled back again and the light from the window made his eyes shine like mint leaves, translucent and soft. His strokes had lengthened considerably but his gaze held for some time and she was loath to look away though her eyes ached to fall closed. Finally his smile faded and the pensive look he wore distracted her from the groan of the couch springs and the slap of his hips meeting hers.

"lover, ca va?" she smoothed his brow with a bitten thumb and strained her neck to kiss it.

He just shook his head and buried his face in the notch of her neck before ghosting his hands from her waist down to tilt her pelvis at a sharper angle. Her concerns were replaced by sighs and she thought she may cry from the drag of his foreskin inside of her. The new depth he was able to achieve with the axis he had her on was polarizing and her earth tilted.

When her breathing had evened and the feathered fringes that framed her eyes were no longer entwined tightly in pleasure, she looked up at him.

"I miss you," he stated.

"Me too, but you are with me now?" she puzzled.

"No, um, I mean, I did, but that was the song you were humming the other day, right?"

She cast her mind back to that day, when she met his mother, "So it was," she confirmed, kissing him again and rocking her hips up. He hadn't finished.

He groaned above her, "Wait!"

"Wait?" she arched her brow and clenched.

He shook his head and chuckled at himself and rocked with her, kissing the tip of her nose, "No, ahhh......But, that's really distracting, so yeah, um, Please! Um,wait." He caught his breath. "I listened to it again when I realized. It made me, made me think. I wanna see you more......be near you as often as I can. And I need you to know, that I care, and I miss you."

She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry, so she did neither. Instead she thanked him for expressing her feelings along with his own without words.

/u1