• May 15, 2017 •

***

[ Luke Protection Squad ]

Aviana: no one ever bring up anything related to high school again or I'll block you.

Aviana: that phase is finally gone from our lives for good, don't want any rememberance to linger.

Nora: agreed.

Luke: kinda extreme way of putting it but okay.

Zach: remember that one time in sophomore year...

Connor: what? When?

Aviana: now you're just asking to be removed from the chat, aren't you?

Connor: who me?

Zach: nope, me.

Aviana: 😒

Kara: come on guys, don't take things too seriously.

Connor: exactly, Ava. Zach is just joking around, as usual.

Aviana: well then, your jokes are pure lame, Zach.

Zach: appreciate the compliment.

Aviana: lamest of the lamest.

Zach: aw, you flatter me 😍

Aviana: ...

Aviana: NOT THE HEART EYES, YOU FUCKER!

Kara: are you okay?

Zach: nope, she's going to chase me down with an axe any moment now.

Nora: uh oh

Nora: run for your life then

Luke: you need any help buddy, I can pick you up.

Aviana: I'll slice your head off first, Luke!

Aviana: just wait till I get my hands on you two!!!

Luke: yikes, not coming then.

***

Luke: yo Zach, you're still alive, right?

Connor: we don't have to prepare a funeral or something?

Kara: are you guys serious rn because if it's a joke, it's too much.

Luke: we are not joking.

Luke: we are genunely concerned for Zach's well being.

Connor: Aviana with an axe is everyone's worst nightmare. (This message has been deleted).

Nora: heartfelt condolences in advance.

Kara: ...

Zach: guys, I'm alive.

Luke: then where's Ava?

Zach: Mom had to intervene so she took Ava off with her to cool down.

Connor: oh.

Kara: why did she get so angry all of a sudden?

Zach: well...

Zach: I have this very bad habit of pranking her?

Connor: shoot, you gotta be kidding me.

Luke: and you're still alive.

Zach: I'm Mom's favorite so yeah, still alive.

Zach: very fortunately.

Kara: what did you do?

Zach: I gave her a present saying it was a gift for getting graduated.

Nora: aww that's sweet.

Zach: yeah but maybe not for her.

Luke: what did you do?

Connor: just tell us already.

Zach: it was a heart eyes emoji plushie...

Connor: ...

Nora: why would she get angry at that? It's such an adorable gift.

Zach: yeah but...

Zach: in case you forgot, Ava hates the heart eyes emoji.

Kara: so when you texted her earlier here with that emoji...

Zach: it was preciely when she opened the box. Double the effect for double the reaction.

Kara: ...

Connor: how are you so fearless?

Zach: 😂

***

Aviana has removed Zach from the chat.

Aviana: he's no brother of mine. And don't any of you dare to bring him up again.

Nora: hey, if you don't need that plushie, can I keep it?

Aviana: ...

Nora: just askin...

Aviana: I burnt it.

Luke: ...

Kara: ...

Connor: ...

Nora: oh... Sad.

***

• May 16, 2017 •

***

[ Timothy <•> Connor ]

C: seriously, Tim?

T: yup.

C: ...

T: not congratulating you until I get my treat.

C: ...

T: hey don't you dare ghost me like that!

C: Timmy, I love you but I can't come to Gotham again. Batman will shut me up in a tank of Kryptonite after what happened last time.

T: sorry, couldn't read past the ily part.

C: ...

T: lol, just kidding.

***

T: no one was asking you to come to Gotham though.

T: besides whatever happened last time was purely the gremlin's fault.

C: ...

T: so yeah, you don't have to fear kryptonite.

T: besides, I am in Metropolis because Dickie dragged my ass to Mount Justice even though I had been conveniently avoiding it so successfully in the past few weeks...

C: you're here?

T: nope, I'm in hell.

C: Damian gave you access to his room or something?

T: ...

T: of course not!

T: I'll just pretend you understood my sarcasm and move on.

C: good call.

***

C: has anyone ever told you that you come off as a very rude and mean person usually?

T: wth are you talking about?

C: I want to know the answer.

T: ah...

T: Meggie has told me that, Ava has said the same, Zach...

C: ...

T: no, Zach could never say such a thing.

T: Jason has said that, Dickie said it once I guess, Steoh told me the same just last night and the gremlin...

T: the gremlin exaggerates.

***

T: but in all reality, what do you mean by I come off as a rude and mean person?

C: I mean you seem like it so...

C: I thought you would know it by now.

T: of course I know 😂

T: I am a rude and mean person, Connie, I don't just seem like one.

C: ...

T: I am very aware of the truth and I have learned to accept it and move on.

C: but you haven't learned to improve your behavior?

T: why would I do that?

T: it's my identity, Connor! Why would I change something that defines me???!!?!?!

C: ...

C: you are incorrigible.

T: as are you, my friend.

T: as are you.

***

C: where are you staying if you're in Metropolis?

T: Mount Justice.

T: second boring place after the Batcave.

C: oh come on...

T: the coffee maker is two minutes away from exploding.

C: wait...

C: how many coffee cups have you consumed already?

T: idk

T: stupid question with no integral answer.

C: ...

T: ever heard of the digit infinity?

T: that's my coffee cup number. I can't recall any other.

***

T: however, that doesn't mean I forgot about your treat.

T: you better pick a coffee shop and text me the location. I'm dying to get out of here.

Connor has shared his current location.

T: see, that's why I hate not being an alien or a speedster.

T: you could be as lazy as ever and still not be late.

C: given the incentive of coffee or drama, you too are very much like a speedster.

***

T: you cheated.

C: I did not!

T: did yes.

C: no, I didn't.

T: cheater.

C: well, you're the one who passed out.

C: what was I supposed to do then!?!?

T: pour me another cup of cofee, the scent would make me come back from the dead even I'm sure.

C: that's not possible.

T: wanna bet?

T: kill me, I dare you.

T: then give me coffee and I will be resurrected, no Lazarus Pit needed 100% guarantee.

C: quite sure that's not how it works.

T: haha, look a Kryptonian clone is teaching a genius human how things work.

T: 🤣🤣🤣

C: ...

C: go to the same hell you were in a few hours earlier.

T: okay babe, see ya.

C: ...

T: sorry, wasn't meant for you.

C: are you texting someone else at the same time?

C: the betrayal...

T: it's Steph.

T: if I don't reply to her text within a minute, she thinks I'm dead and goes all local suicide helpline mode.

T: no wait, that's for the other situation when I get my shower thoughts burdening me down.

T: in this case she would go all emergency police mode, "we gotta dig up a dead body and find the killer then take a merciless revenge."

C: I seriously have no idea how you two are still together.

T: ikr, me neither.

***