• February 11, 2017 •

[ Tim <•> Steph ]

S: where the hell have you been?

T: hello to you too darling, how are you?

S: ...

S: I heard from Dick that Jason abducted you.

S: that asshole.

T: hey, don't say that! I went with him willingly.

S: say that again and I'll make you regret it.

T: ...

S: do you have any idea how long it has been since I even saw your face? I am starting to forget you by now.

T: oh... No, why?

S: almost two fucking months you stay in Metropolis and when you get the chance to leave, instead of coming back, you ditch me for that resurrected crime lord.

T: ...

S: like this level of audacity is beyond me.

***

T: here's a picture just so you don't forget me.

T: Happy Valentine's Day in advance.

S: you're an even bigger asshole than I last remembered!

T: ...

T: life is full of surprises.

S: fuck off.

***

T: hey, I'm sorry.

T: I'll definitely come back to Gotham before fourteenth.

S: don't give me any false hopes.

T: I'm not...

S: you always make promises you don't keep and I'm fucking tired of dealing with that.

***

T: it's just that Jay hasn't gotten tired of me yet. So he'll probably not let me go.

S: and isn't that your fault? 

T: what can I do?

S: you should show him how much of a nuisance you really are instead of donning your persona of super innocent sweet little boy.

T: well...

S: or maybe tell him that it's you stealing his cigarettes. That should do the trick.

T: ...

T: how did you know that?

S: I know you very well, unfortunately.

S: hey, what if I get hold of Jason's number from Dick and expose your act?

T: ...

T: don't...

S: it would be worth it. He'll finally find out why his cigarettes are missing and as a result you'll definitely get kicked out.

T: don't do that, it will have opposite results.

T: instead of kicking me out, he will keep me in his attic and make me clean it up daily without coffee.

T: which would would be hell for me and I won't ever be able to come back to Gotham.

***

S: you're a lost cause.

S: I can't think of anything else that could help you.

T: the thing is Jay is very easy to annoy but even easier to anger.

T: angry Jay is a sight I would 10/10 not recommend.

S: ...

S: never thought the day would come for you to get scared of someone too.

T: I'm not scared of him, I just value my own well being.

***

S: who are you and what have you done to Timothy Suicidal Drake?

T: hey...

T: I'm just as suicidal as ever!

S: bugs me how you're still alive then.

T: I just get the feeling that if I make Jason angry, he won't kill me. 

T: he would break my limbs and torture me but he'll make sure that I don't die.

S: ...

T: and I might seem like a reckless piece of shit to you all who goes around looking to get killed but I still hate pain like any other person.

T: kill me swiftly, that's my motto, no pain allowed.

S: you are incorrigible.

***

S: I don't care whether you've madeJason get tired of you or not, I want you to come back to Gotham as soon as possible.

S: or I'll come to whatever attic you're holed up in Star City and drag your ass back home myself.

T: no, please don't.

T: I promise I'll come back like really soon.

S: I don't care how soon, I want you back in half an hour.

T: hey!

T: half an hour is impossible!

S: ...

S: one hour.

T: you're exactly like Jay, no consideration for the time it takes to travel from one city to another.

S: not my problem.

S: either you're coming back or I'm claiming every single thing in your room, including the entire corner you've built up for yourself in the cave. I'll just assume you died and left it to me.

T: Steph, NO!

T: don't you dare do that!

S: stop me then.

T: ...

T: fine, I'll see what I can do.

S: here goes your favorite coffee maker...

T: NO NO NO NO

T: not my coffee maker!

S: lol, it's mine now.

T: you can't steal my wife from me! We've been married to each other for a decade now, how dare you!

T: to ruin a happy married couple like that!

T: audacious!

S: wow, definitely doesn't feel good to find out that I'm the side chick.

T: ...

T: whatever, put my wife back in my room...

S: come back and take it away from me if you can.

T: ...

***

T: I hate you and I'm in Gotham.

S: aw, Happy Valentines Day in advance to you too 😘

***

[ Aviana <•> Zach ]

Z: I heard Tim's gone back to Gotham.

A: you must have heard that from me.

A: I'm about to distribute sweets in the neighborhood out of joy.

Z: oh...

A: and I hope he never comes here again.

***

Z: you really despise him

A: every sane person would.

Z: I don't.

A: I clearly said sane, didn't I?

Z: ...

A: since when did you get qualified as sane?

Z: whatever.

***

A: hey, Zach, I've got a question for you.

Z: I'm busy.

A: do I look like I care?

Z: is this the question.

A: of course not.

Z: ...

A: I won't stop pestering you until you hear me out so...

Z: ask away.

A: what are your plans for the fourteenth?

Z: ...

Z: what's on the fourteenth?

A: ...

Z: oh...

Z: no plans.

A: why?

A: aren't you going to spend it with Kara?

Z: in case you forgot, Kara and I are just friends...

A: suuuurrrrreeee

Z: for now, I guess.

***

A: since how long till you pick up your guts and ask her out?

Z: hey, it's not like I don't want to ask her out.

Z: I just...

Z: maybe she already has a boyfriend.

A: no, she doesn't.

Z: maybe she wouldn't agree to going out with me.

Z: I've just befriended her, I don't want to ruin that.

A: until or unless you've decided to stay in the fiendzone forever, there's no other thing that's stopping her from accepting you.

Z: ...

A: she so obviously likes you, don't you know?

A: you two are so smitten with each other, it's downright sickening.

Z: okay now shut up.

A: me shutting up won't change the truth.

***

A: Zachary, I will kick you off the Westerley Bridge if you don't ask her out.

Z: hey, why threat me about it?

A: because I'm unfortunately playing matchmaker here and want to set you two up with each other.

***

Z: well, that's news.

Z: you used to curse me each day saying I'd probably die single.

A: I still think that.

Z: ...

A: I just want an incident to prove it.

Z: hey!

Z: me and Kara not your test subjects to prove a stupid assumption.

A: well, then why don't you prove me wrong?

Z: ...

Z: your reverse psychology tricks won't work on me.

Z: I've built a defense mechanism to it over the years.

A: then die single for all I care.

Z: hey! Stop saying that!

***