My heart won't stop beating. I seriously feel like this is a dream.

The love of my life is in our home again.

I was watching her from behind taking in the apartment. She was looking around the place and I became nervous.

She was always making sure the dishes was done, the jackets were hung and all that stuff. I can only hope that it's the way she would want it.

I grab a shirt on the couch and put it on by the time she turn facing me, I see in her eyes she was satisfied with the place.

I couldn't stop looking her big brown eyes and her plump lips. I always found it adorable that no matter how much she moved, her bangs stayed the same.

"Nothing change." She states out.

I look around. "Nope. Everything is the same."

She nods her head. "I see you still haven't put the curtains." She points to the curtains by our bedroom door.

I remember her nagging at me for weeks to put up the curtains.

I chuckle at the memory. "Yeah. Sorry."

"Don't be. It's your place."  My heart stop hearing those words.

It's not my place. It's our place. I said inside my head.

"Have a seat." I gesture towards the couch.

She walked towards the couch and sat down. I still had the container of cookies she made in my hands. I sat down close to her but not next to her. I didn't want to scare her.

I open the container and took a cookie and ate it. I moan out when the I taste the delicious chocolate.

"Lili, these are amazing."

"Thank you."

I offer her a cookie and she gladly took it. She took a bite with her eyes close.

It's funny how the little things are some of the things you miss the most.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask her. She nods her head. "Why are you here?"

She hung her head in embarrassment. "Umm.. I don't know actually. Rose and Jisoo brought over their Christmas gift because Jimin and Jin are looking for them." I chuckle at my friends. "And she brought your gift for our friends. And I felt bad that you were spending Christmas alone."  She look in my eyes for a moment and back down. "And I remember how much you love those cookies and I just made them. And now I'm here."

I gather all the things she just said. She was here for guilt not because she misses me. I would be sad but I'm not. I don't care why she's here, I'm just glad she is.

"Thank you." I tell her.

Her head snap up at my voice. "For what?"

"Thinking about me." I tell her as I look into her eyes.

"Oh." She look back down.

I hate that she is hiding her face, I can't read her. I scooted closer to her and lift her chin up with my finger.

"I don't know how long this dream will last so please don't hide your face. I want to enjoy it as long as I can." I tell her when her eyes reaches mine.

I heard her taking in a breath and I knew she was surprised with my bold move.

I then noticed water on the brim of her eyes and I held her cheek. When she close her eyes at my touch and I felt a tear from her eyes.

"Ja-gi-ya, please don't cry." I tell her.

"I miss you." She tells me in a bare whisper.

Hearing those words was music to my ears in that moment.

I suddenly felt the need to grab her face with both hands with her eyes till close and kiss her.

And that is exactly what I did.

I felt a gasp out of her mouth when our lips met. So I took the advantage to push my tongue in her mouth.

Feeling her lips on me and her being able to touch like this is was all I wanted for Christmas. Her hands came up on my chest and she grab my shirt as if she was scare I would disappear.

I held her back to show her I'm here.

Our kisses became frantic, I started to kiss her neck because I knew she needed to breath. Her hands grip my hair and I groan at the touch.

"Kookie" she moans out my name and my body just ignites at the sound.

My hands went down to the hem of her shirt and lift it off of her and she did the same with my shirt.

I took the time and admire her body. She was always perfect in my eyes and she had exactly what I needed to turn me on.

I couldn't just look at her anymore, I went back her lips grab her her thighs from behind and hoist her up around my waist.

I carried her into our bedroom and laid her down.

I hook my arms around her leggings and pulled them off. I needed to see all of her.

When they were off, I took my pants off. I thought if we were going to do this, we would be shy all over again but it's been too long and we needed each other.

I hover my body over and kiss again but more slowly this time. I wanted to let her know just because we are about to do something doesn't mean this is all I want.

I love her and I need her to understand that.

Her hands were slowly feeling me and my mind was running low in patience.

"Are you sure this okay?" I ask her.

"Kookie, it's been too long. Please." She tells me.

I smirk at the thought she is begging me to be inside her.

I don't know if she been with anybody else but if she did that person clearly doesn't know how to satisfy my Lili.

I grab a condom from my drawer and put it on and I look into her eyes when I slowly insert myself inside her.

Having her this night was amazing. All I hope is that she doesn't regret this or leave me again. I wouldn't be strong enough to let her go again.