Sorry for updating so late, I stayed up all night making a power point presentation.

Wanna see my notes?

WELCOME TO MY TOPIC ON WHY MARIO IS PART OF THE MAFIA!

Because reasons : - the mafia has its origin in italy   hmm... who else do we know who is also                                                  italian?

                     THAT'S RIGHT; MARIO!

  numero dos:           - it can be called a brotherhood

                      Mario has a brother too. 

                       His partner in crime: LUIGI!

Coincidence? I THINK NOT!!

numero tres:          - the mafia is pretty active in the USA

                                        Who else lives in the USA? 

IT'S -A- FUCKING ME! MARIO!

numero quatro:   -the word "mafia" can be translated to; strong, proud. But at the same time                                            also pretty and elegant

Well, well, well... if it isn't our strong and proud character PRINCESS PEACH!

Followed by the most elegant character; BOWSER 

numero I already lost count: -The mafia has a long history, SO DOES MARIO! HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE AND HE'LL ALWAYS BE!

other reason: - moustache filled with secrets

How it is formed: - Mario would be the mafia boss, while Toad is his advisor. Luigi would be the                                          second in command, while Wario, Waluigi and Donkey-kong are the                                                           captains. Supported by Dwayne-the-rock-goomba soldiers.

Crimes: - animal abuse

                  - theft

                  - tax fraud

                  - doesn't like mushrooms and he's fucking italian????                      suspicious

                  - arson

                   - Super Mario 64 manga from 1996 said that the mushrooms in the game come from dead Marios

-> Mario actually commits self-cannibalism

In conclusion, we can prove that Mario is part of the international mafia and he'll send his gang after the whole world


Thank you for you time and attention.

UPDATE SOMETHING LIKE THREE MONTHS LATER: I FUCKING FORGOT MY BINGO RESULTS! I AM A MENACE! A TWAT! PATHETIC! 

I got Bingo for the first row

Now I can rest in peace