I made my way through the front door of the building, the bells on the top of the door making a little jingle as I walked in.  I used to love coming here after my parents stopped keeping me home, there was something about books that I could never get over.  Maybe it was the smell of one that just reached the shelves, maybe it was the endless stories and rabbit holes I got myself into when I tried something new to read.  I think the last series I got into was something about a little kid finding this giant dragon and befriending it.  I don't really remember what it was called. I bet if I looked hard enough I would recognize the covers as I passed by, but I didn't have any time for reminiscing.

"Is there anything I can help you with?" A soft voice suddenly spoke.  I turned around to see an older looking woman, though she wasn't much taller than me, maybe a few inches at best. She wore a white blouse with a light pink flower pattern around it and a long skirt that matched the blouse. Her hair was also a light pink, with a headband that showed a pink flower on top, though the pink of the flower was much more vibrant than her hair, so it stuck out more. Her eyes were a bright raspberry color, and for a split second, she reminded me of Lara. But this lady was much older, and Lara had... well, you know, you read about it.

"Oh, yeah," I said, smiling a bit like I wasn't under severe pressure at the moment, "I was looking for this book I read I while ago but I can't remember the name of it. It was this murder mystery book about a group of kids getting trapped in a house. Do you think they have it around here somewhere?"

To tell you the truth, I came up with that on the spot.  I figured if anyone had experienced the same thing we had, they wouldn't write about it as an article or something non-fiction for the same reason we wouldn't tell anyone about our experience.  It's so bizarre and unrealistic, even I wouldn't have believed it happened if I hadn't been through it myself.  Besides, murder plots are common, even if the gore is down to earth detailed, the most you'll be suspected of is murdering people yourself, not being so deranged that you think you went through your own book's plot.  The murdering people part can be disproved pretty easily too, just ask Bret Easton Ellis. 

"Hm, I don't remember hearing of it, but I can lead you to the murder mystery section and you can look for it if you'd like." The lady said. I nodded and began to follow her down the rows of books.  We weren't too far from where she was leading me, so it wasn't a long walk at all.

Ironically enough, murder mystery used to be one of my favorite genres. Keyword "used to," because after the incident I couldn't even bear to pick them back up again. Jojo had some in his collection he offered me before, but like I said, the concept was ruined. Maybe someday I could get back into it, and maybe that day would be today. I looked at the shelves quickly to find the section labeled "F", thinking the title could be "Flicker", and lo and behold, something popped up.

It was a little more than 300 pages long, which was a pretty decently sized book. The cover was pitch black, with big red text that read "Flickering Lights". If the name hadn't tipped me off, it would've been the summary on the back of the book. Sure enough, it was the same elements; kids trapped in a house and forced to kill and blame each other.

I found it odd that the summary was on the back. Most modern books had the summaries on the back of the front cover, but some of the older books I read had it on the very back just like this one. It made me curious, and so I checked the submission date stamped inside.

January 25th, 2004. This book is nearly 40 years old.

"Did you find what you were looking for already?"  The lady asked. I nodded, suddenly too nervous to say much else.

"You know, I thought you reminded me of someone I knew. Your name wouldn't happen to be Jordyn, would it?"  She asked. 

Now I was really nervous. You know that feeling when you go to a family gathering and everyone remembers you but you don't even know their names? This was what that was like, but somehow a hundred times worse.  I kept silent for a split second too long, and just like that, things were awkward.

But then something clicked.  Pink hair, raspberry eyes, overwhelming kindness.  There was a reason she reminded me of Lara.

"You're Lara's mother?"  I asked, quickly realizing I still hadn't answered her question but then avoiding the thought just as fast.  She nodded, a smile on her face.

"So you are Jordyn! It's so nice to meet you," She said, reaching her hand out. I gladly shook her hand.

"It's good to meet you too ma'am," I said, "but you can just call me Jo if you want."

"Then you may call me Lola,"  She said. 

"I thought you worked at the hospital all this time," I said.  I remembered seeing her a few times before at the front desk when I was a kid, but just after I started going to public school she started working as a nurse.

"I have, I've just been getting too old for all that stress.  Retired about 4 years ago now." Lola said. "You know, my daughter used to talk about you a lot back when she was younger."

"She did?"

"Oh yes, plenty!  You and her other little friends of course. She was such a sweet girl..."

I sighed.  "She really was..." I mumbled, probably just loud enough for Lola to hear. She just nodded.

"Oh, let me check the book out for you. You don't happen to have a library card, would you?" Lola asked.

"I might still have the one from when I was a kid, but if I do it's probably still at my parents' house."  I said.  I didn't even remember when library cards expired, much less if they did at all here.  As we walked back to the front counter, I noticed a set of books in the history section.  It was like those old World books, where the spines of each book lined up perfectly to make some sort of image, but one of the books were missing from the collection.  I don't know why it caught my eye so quickly, but something about it seemed familiar, off in a way.  Lola saw me looking at it.

"Oh, I remember hearing from a friend about that collection." She said. "Apparently an anonymous author sent in all of them except for one, but it's been... I think about 20 years they said, since it was sent in."

"So you don't know who it was sent by?"  I asked.  Lola shook her head.

"Like I said, they sent it anonymously.  A few people have checked some of the books out before, but no one's bought them as of yet."

I looked on the spine of the books for a minute, and the second I read the author's name, or I guess pen name, I immediately knew where I had to go next.  But first, I had to actually get out of here.

I raised the book I was holding a little.  "How much is this again?"  I asked.

Lola looked at the book in my hands for a moment before looking back at me.  "Actually, I can let you borrow it without a fee. It's one of our older and more obscure books.  According to the records, it hasn't been picked up in a long while either, so I'm sure no one would really miss it."

"Oh, um, thank you," I said, "when should I return it?"

"Whenever you're finished with it," she said, "keep it as long as you need."

I nodded, a little confused but happy with the gift.  "Thanks, it's been really nice to meet you, ma'am."

"You too.  It's been so long since I've seen anyone of your youth after my daughter's death, those sure were different times."  Lola said.

"I have to ask, why do you think she's dead?"  I asked. I knew the answer very well, but I knew Lola shouldn't.  She wasn't there.  "Lara only went missing, wouldn't you rather think she's still out there?"

"Oh no," Lola said, shaking her head, "I know she's gone.  I've known ever since you all came back and she didn't."

***

"Lukey? Lukey, is that you?"

I opened my eyes to almost nothing. Seriously, it was pitch black everywhere I looked.  I was laying down on my back, so I sat up to see something other than the darkness.  There was a blue figure standing a small distance away from me, seeming to glow in the dark.  I haven't seen him in 4 years, but somehow I recognized him immediately.

"John?"  I called.  He smiled.

"Lukey!"  John cried, running up to me, pulling me off of my feet and squeezing me in a tight hug. "I've been trying to reach you for so long!"

I wasn't having it. "So you did this to me?! Let go!"

Shocked, John dropped me back down. "Did what?"

"Last I checked I got so hurt that I passed out, and now you're coming here, wherever here is, and telling me you've been trying to 'reach' me?! You had some part in this, didn't you?!" I said, glaring him down (or up, in my case).

"Passed out?! Moire and Villy told me you would just be asleep when this happened!" John said.

"Moire? Villy? What the fuck are you talking about right now?!" I demanded.

"Look, it's a long and complicated story-"

"OH I HAVE ALL DAY!"

"What is wrong with you?" John asked, looking more concerned than angry. "I- I thought you'd be happy to see me again, at the very least..."

"I've been trying to move on with my life!" I yelled. "I can't just be stuck as a kid forever, but here I am, having some weird and wacky dream about my best friend who's been dead for 4 years! That's surely helping!"

"Luke, I-"

"Lukey." I quickly corrected. John sighed.

"Listen, the point is that this isn't just some 'weird and wacky' dream. I've been wanting to talk to you again ever since I died, but things have been so complicated. I'm risking my entire being just to be here!" John said. "And speaking of that, I also had something really important to say."

"Go ahead." I said, crossing my arms. He nearly caught me off guard when he grabbed my shoulders and forced me to look at him dead in the eye.

"There's someone out there who's just like me, and he's trying to help you all to his best ability. Find him and help him as much as you can, at least promise me you'll do that." John said.

"Just like you how?" I asked, somewhat sarcastically. "A math junkie? Deaf and nearly blind? Fights with his best friend right before he dies?"

"No! Not physically like me, deep down like me!"

"Emotionally damaged?? What do you want me to look for here?!"

I shut my eyes tightly as I asked the last question, and when I opened them up, I was in a hospital bed.