Chapter 7 (I think...)-The Attack of the FANGIRLS!!!!

"Are, are they gone yet?" Jacob asked, hiding behind a couch.

"No." jasper said and opened the door. A swarm of girls crowded around the door.

"Back! Back I say!" The picture said and tried to hit them. "Ew! Teenage Girls!" It started to brake down and cry.

"THERE ONE IS!" A girl screamed.

"CLOSE THE DOOR!" Emmet ran forward and slammed the picture close.

"Thanks allot Jacob, now we have rabid fan girls outside waiting for you to streak out there." Rosalie hissed.

"Don't be hatin' Blondie." Jacob glared.

"Why would I be jealous of you?" Rosalie growled.

"Because you don't have any fan boys." Jacob said.

"She has a point." Carlisle said.

"No! I'm not designed to be stretched that direction!" The picture yelled. There was a ripping noise and the painting/door came clean out of the door.

"Oh dear god." Edward gasped.

"GET HIM!" A girl shouted when they spotted Jacob's head.

"Ah! No! I'm to young to get raped!" Jacob cried.

"Go wolf!" Emmet shouted as he was swallowed up by the sea of fan girls.

"oh yeah!" Jacob said and turned into his wolf form, his close ripped off and he dove into the crowd, easily running out after getting locks of hair torn out.

"I GOT SOME!" A girl screamed and nearly fainted, but then had to fight off another fan girl. Jacob bolted down the hallway, the girls were a stampede of elephants chasing him.

"Crap! Stairs! My one weakness!" Jacob cursed.

"Jacob? Is that you?" Leah asked.

"Yeah, I'm being chased by a horde of fan girls." Jacob said. Leah started laughing hysterically. "Don't laugh, what should I do?" Jacob asked.

"Turn human." Leah said.

"What? Why?" Jacob asked.

"Just do it whore!" Leah said.

"Fine fine." Jacob said and turned into a human, then turned around the face the fan girls, his eyes shut tight. The girls froze in their tracks and stared at him.

"There's a breeze." He said to myself. The girls all gasped and fell down, stunned unconscious.

"Holy shit, your junk paralyzed them!" Emmet was freed from the crowd.

"God dammit, that was the second outfit I ruined." Jacob cursed and looked around.

"Quit whining you metrosexual." Emmet rolled his eyes. Jacob covered himself yet again and ran off back to their room to get more close.

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A car zoomed up and into the castle. It was low to the ground, then Hagrid jumped out of it. Carlisle and Esme walked forward.

"Here is yer car." He said.

"Thanks Hagrid, don't you have a class to teach?" Carlisle asked.

"Oh yeah, what time is it?" He asked.

"Around ten." Esme checked her watch.

"Blimey!" Hagrid slapped his forehead.

"What is it? Did you realize you could have had a V8?" Carlisle asked, leaning forward.

"No! I'm late for me class!" Hagrid said and shoved himself inside the car. "Do ye mind if I take yer car?" He asked.

"Uh, no." Esme waved him away.

"As long as he goes to an English class." Carlisle muttered.

"What did ye say?" Hagrid asked.

"Oh, nothing, just go." Carlisle said. Hagrid nodded and he drove off at full speed, the car swerved and went straight into the grass, leaving tire marks behind.

"I can't believe that fat buffoon is late to his own class." Malfoy said in his stuck-up voice.

"Maybe you can't see him from behind your hair." Ron snapped.

"Watch it Weasley. I'm rich." Malfoy spat back.

"He has a point." Neville said. The kids were gathered around Hagrid's hut, they had been waiting for a few minutes.

"Do you hear that?" Hermione asked, looking around.

"Yeah, it sounds like a car." Harry turned around as well. Hagrid at full speed, drove straight for Harry and ran him over.

"HAHAHA! POTTER!" Malfoy started to laugh, holding his ribs. Harry was plastered in the windshield.

"Get out of the way Harry! I can't see!" Hagrid cursed, doing a doughnut (that is when the car drives in a circle). Hagrid activated the windshield whippers and started to hit Harry uncontrollably. Everyone was running out of the way as the car chased after everyone.

"Hagrid! Push the brakes!" Harry yelled.

"What?" Hagrid asked. There was another thump.

"You ran over Neville!" Harry said. The car thunked and Hagrid finally pushed the brakes. The car jerked to a stop. The force from the car's speed transferred into Harry and he was thrown off the car and on the wall of Hagrid's hut. Malfoy was rolling on the ground from laughter.

"Harry! Are you OK?" Hagrid struggled to pull himself out of the car, getting stuck in it's frame.

"I think you broke a leg and a few ribs." Harry said. A few kids ran up to the castle, and a few minutes later returned with Dumbledore and Madame Pomfery.

"What happened here?" Dumbledore asked. Hagrid broke down in tears, sobbing while trying to explain what happened. "Hagrid, it was an accident, you are forgiven." Dumbledore said.

"That was so funny! We should have brought a camera!" Malfoy howled from laughter.

"What is the diagnosis?" Hermione asked Madame Pomfery.

"His left leg is broken in three places as well as several ribs, and his right wrist is sprained." She explained.

"Will he get better soon?" Hermione asked.

"In a few days, possibly a week." Madame Pomfery said. Harry was whisked away back up to the Castle.

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"Harry? Harry? GET UP!" Cold water was dumped on his head. Harry was jolted awake and looked around. Renesmee stood next to him, holding a bucket. A very familiar wolf sat next to her, wearing a bonnet. Lupin sat across from them, reading the newspaper.

"Renesmee?" Harry sat up.

"Yes. That is me." Renesmee said, braiding the wolf's hair.

"What are you doing to Siri- the dog?" Harry asked.

"I got bored." Renesmee shrugged. "I like your dog, he reminds me of Jacob, Jacob can turn into a wolf. It runs in his family, but only appears if a vampire is near." Renesmee explained.

"Oh, uh. That's cool I guess." Harry said.

"NESSIE! THEY HAVE CANDY IN THE GREAT HALL!" Jacob yelled and ran into the room, waving a handful of jelly beans then shoved them wall into his mouth.

"Ooh, I want one! Bye Harry, doggy, and Lupin!" Renesmee jumped down and ran off with Jacob down to the great hall.

"THERE HE IS!" A voice yelled.

"RUN NESSIE!" Jacob called and disappeared down the hall. A second later, a hoard of fan girls, all screaming and crying passed the door way. Lupin got up and closed the door. Sirius then turned into a human.

"That little girl is strange, when ever she touched me, I kept seeing things." He said and pulled off the bonnet and shaking out the braids.

"Oh, why are you here?" Harry asked.

"Dumbledore sent Sirius a letter about what happened and he told me, so we came to see if you were OK." Lupin explained.

"I'm not a kid, it's not like I was on my death bed." Harry mumbled.

"Yeah, we know, but did you see some of those vampire chicks? They were so h-"

"Sirius! This is not the time." Lupin said quickly.

"Oh sorry." Sirius mumbled.

"I agree though, but they-" Lupin started.

"Don't talk about my family!" Renesmee suddenly appeared.

"Uh, sorry." Sirius said. Renesmee looked at Sirius, tehn looked around.

"Were is the doggy?" She asked.

"He went out to pee." Lupin said.

"No he didn't we would have seen him." Renesmee walked forward and squinted at Sirius. "You're the dog! Are you like Jacob?" She asked.

"Who?" Sirius took a step back.

"Who said my name?" Jacob walked inside.

"You can both turn into wolves at will!" Renesmee said, clapping her hands.

"So? I'm better." Sirius said.

"Huh? Are not!" Jacob growled.

"Am so." Sirius replied.

"Are not." Jacob said.

"Am so." Sirius said. This went on a few times.

"Now, now, we can all settle this, I'm better." Lupin said.

"Huh?" The two turned to him.

"I'm a werewolf, I'm stronger than you." Lupin said. The three then started arguing about it, then it escalated into a fist fight.

"Kick his ass Jacob!" Renesmee cheered. The door flew open and a parade of panda's in bikini's drinking martini's pranced in singing opera.

"AHHHHH!" Harry fell off his bed.

"I'M INNOCENT!" Ron jumped up, eating some of Harry's get better candy.

"Is Lupin here? Or Sirius?" Harry asked, clawing his way up the bed and back on.

"No. Why would they?" Ron asked, shoving in his mouth a handful of candy.

"Nothing, I just had a bad dream." Harry shook his head.

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Hehe..... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in fits of laughter in my own story!! LOL.... Tell if you like! Btw Edward and Cedric meet in the 13th chappie... :) Wait for it!!!! Eh.... Will upload OLD later 2day... Right now i havee a bleeding finger to go take care of... :( My own tortoise bit me... Poor thing.... Word of advice, VEVER FEED A TORTOISE WITH YOUR HAND DANGROUSLY CLOSE TO IT"S TOOTHLESS YET INCREADIBLY DANGEROUS MOUTH!!!!!!!!!!!! ohk.... Goodbye!!!!!!!!!!!