Stunned, Teddy didn't move, staring at me. Before he responded, I left the bathroom. I was so hungry I would have eaten anything, including baked beans. Mrs. McDonough made meatloaf and mashed potatoes tonight. My mother never made meatloaf and she wasn't a fan of mashed potatoes. Growing up, I ate a lot of chicken and fresh vegetables. As an adult, I continued the same trend. Mashed potatoes wasn't something I normally ate.

Millie's grace was short and sweet, but not as humorous as Teddy's. "Dear Lord, thank you for the food we're about to eat and for our guest, Eric. He's really nice. Amen."

I laughed to myself because I didn't consider myself nice.

During dinner, Teddy was strangely quiet, his body tense. All the attention turned to me. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?" Dorothy asked me.

"I had a sister," I replied. "Her name was Erin."

"What happened to her?" Margaret asked.

"She died last year."

"Our sister died, too," Millie said.

Mrs. McDonough swallowed hard, tilting her head down. I bet she wasn't the type who cried in front of anyone. I imagined her crying alone in bed at night while her husband turned his back to her, his way of coping with the deaths of their daughters.

"I'm sorry," I said, spooning mashed potatoes into my mouth. The mashed potatoes tasted more like butter and milk than potatoes.

"Are your parents still alive?" Dorothy asked.

"No. They passed away, too, but I have a lot of friends. I like the people I work with. I love my students. This is only a temporary gig. I can't wait to get back."

"What's a gig?" Jimmy asked.

How do I explain 'gig?' "It's uh... it's a temporary work assignment."

Teddy picked at his food, barely taking any bites. He was typically the one with the ravenous appetite. "May I be excused, please?" Teddy said.

"Everything okay, son?" Mr. McDonough asked as Teddy stood up.

"I'm not feeling well. I think I'll go to bed."

Everyone's eyes followed Teddy out of the room, all concerned with his uncharacteristic behavior.

"Go check on him in ten minutes," Mr. McDonough said to Jimmy. "I bet the newspaper turned him away again. He takes everything personally and it's nothing personal. There's just no work."

"No, there's work," I interjected. "They gave him temporary work while one of the other journalists is out."

"For the life of me, I'll never figure that boy out. Are you sure he's ours, Mary?"

"I couldn't be more sure," Mary said. Apparently, this was an ongoing joke in the family.

In ten minutes, Jimmy left, returning a few minutes later. "He told me to get lost," he said, sitting back down at the table. "His nose is in a book again."

I wondered if he was reading Orlando. I didn't expect to see him for the rest of the night, but he appeared in the attic while I re-read segments of The Red Badge of Courage. Reading by flashlight was difficult and my eyes hurt.

"I came up for chocolate," Teddy said, rummaging through his bottom dresser drawer. As he approached me, he broke off a bit of the candy bar and handed it to me. "Did you know that Oscar Wilde had a male lover for years?"

"Yes, and he was also arrested for homosexuality and served hard labor for two years."

"Do you think homosexuality should be a crime?"

"No. Do you?"

He shrugged, avoiding my eyes. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight, Eric."

"Goodnight, Teddy." I waited for him to leave before turning off the flashlight. "Wait," I said as he was about to go down the ladder. "If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here. I'm a good listener."

He didn't respond, continuing to descend the ladder.

Every day Teddy walked me to school and picked me up, and every day we'd stop for a beer at the Worthen House. Not once did he open up to me about his sexuality. Likewise, I kept my mouth shut. He seemed to forget about my dream comment. The following morning, he was back to his goofy, talkative self.

By Saturday, I'd gone five days without shaving or showering. I did my best washing myself in the sink, but I desperately wanted my hot shower back home. This afternoon Teddy and I planned on seeing the Bride of Frankenstein. I'd hoped to take a shower before going out, but I never got the chance. Although I got paid yesterday, I gave most of my check to Mrs. McDonough. I barely had enough for a movie and a popcorn.

The Rialto Theater first opened as the Owl Theatre in 1911. It was built in the train shed of the original Boston and Maine Railroad terminal in downtown Lowell. Its name changed from the Owl Theater to the Rialto Theater in 1920.

When it closed in 1960, its owner converted it to a bowling alley which thrived for many years. Under the auspices of the Lowell Urban National Park, the Rialto Theatre's auditorium was torn down and the head house (which housed the lobby, ticket booth, and concession stand) was restored to its original appearance and became the Richard and Nancy Donahue Family Academic Arts Center.

Although Teddy had combed his hair before we left, his hair was unruly again by the time we got to the theater. He had a habit of running his fingers through his hair, often twirling his hair and creating knots. He was so fucking adorable... totally my type. Theater seats were smaller than I was used to, and the seats didn't recline like most modern theater seats did. My knee often knocked against Teddy's. A few times I shifted in my seat, turned on by Teddy's fingers against my thigh. During the movie, we often glanced at each other. Teddy would smirk and I'd stick my tongue out. Cigarette smoke clouded my vision, making it difficult for me to see the screen. I also had occasional coughing fits.

Following the movie, Teddy and I made our way to the Worthen Tavern and had a couple of beers. The place was hopping on a Saturday night. There were no available tables or booths, so we sat at the bar. "So I'm in the recurring dream you're having?" Teddy asked in a low voice, making sure no one could hear us.

"Yes," I said.

"Maybe that's where I've seen you before. You must have been in a dream."

"Yeah, that must be it. Tell me about your dreams where you travel into the future."

"I never said I traveled into the future. I said I traveled through time through different universes. I don't know if it was the future."

"It sounds like the future, doesn't it?"

"I guess so," he said.

"What else did you see in your dream?"

"I don't know. I can't remember much of anything else," he said, but I doubted that was true.

"I don't think we should talk about it here."

Teddy nodded in agreement, shifting the subject to the highs and lows of the movie.

By ten o'clock, we headed back to the house, slightly buzzed from the beers. Once again, I forgot my gloves, so I shoved my freezing cold hands in my pockets.

Mrs. McDonough was still up and mopping the kitchen floor while the radio played softly. Everyone else was tucked in for the night. "Mom, what are you still doing up?" Teddy asked.

"The floor needed mopping," she said. "Mr. Gagnon, you can't go to Sunday Mass looking like a hobo."

"You mean Church?" I responded.

"If you stay with us, you're going to Mass. You're baptized, aren't you?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Received your first Communion?"

"Yes."

"Then you're coming. Go take a bath and shave. Now's probably a good time to take one. There's no line."

Teddy stood beside me, smirking.

Instead of going to the attic, I went to the bathroom. I hoped to take a shower, but the shower was broken and they couldn't afford a plumber. While Teddy washed his face, I sat on the toilet, waiting impatiently for the deep, porcelain bathtub to fill with hot water.

"Do you have a razor?" Teddy asked. "I agree with my mother; you're starting to look like a hobo."

"Yes, I have a razor."

"Well, you better use it or everyone's gonna stare at you tomorrow. Worse, my mother will kick you out."

As usual, Teddy was taking forever, so I undressed while he brushed his teeth. I was too tired to care about modesty. "What are you doing?" he asked as I tossed my shirt and undershirt in the corner.

"Taking a bath. I'm tired and want to go to bed."

Teddy's eyes followed me into the bathtub. I eased myself into the hot water. "Wanna jump in?" I asked as he stared at me with a toothbrush in his mouth. His eyes scanned my body before he turned to spit in the sink. "Is your razor upstairs?" he asked as I closed my eyes, relaxing in the water.

"Yep," I muttered.

"I'll get it for you."

"It's on the nightstand."

The water relaxed me so much, I dozed off, only waking to someone yanking my head back. I coughed, gasping for air.

"You fell asleep," Teddy said. He sounded out of breath. "I just pulled you out of the water, idiot."

"Sorry." I staggered to my feet, stumbling out of the tub.

"Whoa... you're alright," Teddy said, catching me. He wrapped a towel around me, helping me out of the tub.

Regaining my composure, I opened my antique shaving kit. I stood at the sink, lathering my face with shaving cream. I then took a deep breath, bringing the razor to my chin. When I looked in the mirror, I was surprised to see Teddy's face staring back at me. My hand slipped, causing me to nick my skin.

"Fuck," I groaned. "What the fuck are you doing, Teddy? You scared the crap out of me."

"You forgot your bathrobe," he said, draping it over my shoulders. "You can't walk around the house in a towel."

"I'm just going to bed."

"You still have to walk down the hall. I've never met anyone like you."

"I could say the same about you," I said as he brought a comb to my hair. I attempted to resume shaving as he combed my hair.

"Your hair is different, too."

If it wasn't 1935, I'd think he was flirting with me. Maybe gaydar existed back then and he knew where I stood. Whatever the case, my body reacted to his closeness and touches.

"You're kinda handsome," he said, placing one hand on my shoulder.

"Thanks," I said. "You're not so bad yourself."

"Yeah right," he laughed. "Take a look at Jimmy and take a look at me. There's no comparison."

I turned around to face him, leaning against the sink. "You're right. There is no comparison. Jimmy has that movie star kind of quality about him. It's fake. You're not fake. He doesn't have what you have."

"What? Poop brown eyes?"

"You think you have poop brown eyes?" I laughed. "I have brown eyes, but I'd never describe them as poop brown."

"No, Eric, you have puppy dog brown eyes, and you're tall and strong. I'm nothing like you."

"Everyone is different. Did you know that your poop brown eyes match your poop brown hair?"

He giggled, biting his bottom lip.

"I think you're stunning," I said, squeezing his arm. After thirty seconds of holding his arm, I let go and turned back around to finish shaving. "Are you just gonna stand there and stare? I need to focus."

"Sorry. I... uh... Goodnight. See you in the morning."

"Yeah, goodnight."

A man hadn't looked at me like Teddy did in years. When Erin got sick, I didn't do much dating. Sometimes, I'd find a guy online, but it was never anything more than a fuck. My emotions were tied up with my sister. When she took a turn for the worse, sex with anyone was the farthest thing from my mind. After she died, depression had such a hold of me, the idea of being with anyone repulsed me. The desire was gone, and I used to love sex.

In this dream, the desire returned. I hoped Teddy would invade my privacy, snooping in my room or lying in my bed, preferably naked. But he wasn't anywhere in my room. I noticed an additional blanket on my bed that I assumed Teddy left for me. I dropped my damp towel and crawled into bed, leaving my pajamas in a pile on the floor.

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