I spent the entire weekend emptying my eye sockets, downing bottle after bottle of wine, and most of all, ignoring every beep of my phone that was undoubtedly altering me to yet another message from Nathan.

He had been sending me messages ever since the night that I broke up with him. The texts ranged from simple hello's to the ever painful 'I love you' messages that would evoke sob after pitiful sob from me, resulting in Rachel taking away my phone for hours on end and monitoring my messages and calls.

I hadn't spoken to anybody about what had happened yet besides for Rachel, Ben, and Mia. I considered calling my mom but the notion of just hearing her soothing voice sent my mind into a downward spiral of depressing emotions.

The weekend felt endless and yet Monday slipped up far quicker than I was prepared for.

I couldn't miss anymore classes this close to the end of the semester. That meant that just days after having my heart ripped brutally from my chest by the actions of Nathan McCoy, I was going to be forced to be in the same room with the heart breaker himself.

I tried with my appearance, I really did. Yet, just seconds into looking for a shirt to wear I came across various articles of clothing that wickedly taunted me, reminding me of different occasions and memories that I had made with Nathan wearing that very piece of clothing.

In the end, yoga pants and an Aerosmith T-shirt made the cut as I ran a brush through my wavy hair and applied the minimum amount of make up to my face to try and conceal the dark bags under my eyes due to the sleepless, miserable nights that I had endured over the weekend.

"Alex," A knock sounded at my bedroom door. "You up?"

I trudged past the piles of clothing on my floor and made my way to my bedroom door.

"Yeah, one minute."

I placed my hand lazily on my bedroom door handle and turned in, opening the door to reveal an extremely somber looking Ben, a supportive smile set on his lips.

"You ready?"

"No," I answered honestly in a gruff voice. Whether I was ready to face Nathan again or not mattered very little as I sulked my way out of my bedroom and walked aimlessly to the front door, knowing that Ben was close behind with both of our school bags in hand.

The short drive to school seemed considerably shorter today. While Ben drove us along the familiar path to the University, he tried to cheer me up with jokes, loud music, and a variety of other things that unfortunately didn't elicit but a small uplift of my lips that I knew looked as forced as it felt.

My stomach began to twist uncomfortably as the school came into view and my eyes searched for and spotted Nathans car on their own accord. A large part of me hoped that he would stay home for the day or switch jobs over the weekend to keep both of us from having to endure any further agony of seeing each other three times a week for another three weeks until the semester ended.

I was far too engrossed within my morbidly hopeless thoughts that I hadn't even realized that the car had come to a stop and Ben was standing outside of my car door, waiting for me to join him.

Reluctantly, I opened the passenger side door and stepped out onto the warm asphalt, the sun's rays soaking through my flips flops on the ground. My hardened heart rejected all forms of warmth though, intent on staying cold and isolated for as long as possible.

Ben's comforting stare met mine as he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me towards the looming building in front of us; the building that contained the one man I desperately loved and despised all at once.

"I'll be there for you every step of the way, cookie," Ben spoke as we got closer and closer to the Arts building. "He won't touch you, won't talk to you, and won't even look at you without me being there to stop him."

My head dropped onto Ben's strong shoulder in appreciation. "Thank you," I said as I felt him squeeze my waist reassuringly.

The second we walked into the building, I was on high alert.

My heart beat was at a constant high that was most likely very bad for my heath. My palms were sweating profusely as my nerves took over my body and my eyes darted in every which direction in search of those hauntingly familiar sapphire eyes.

"Don't look up," came Ben's voice beside my ear.

And of course, due to human nature being inclined to do the exact opposite of what they have been told, my eyes snapped up instantly only to regret the decision immediately.

Those blue eyes that I had become so attached to stared back at me intensely. Emotion after emotion flew through his eyes as we gazed at each other for only a brief moment before I wretched my eyes away from his, knowing that if I gazed any longer, I would lose myself in his hurt filled eyes and might give into the persistent desire to forget everything and fall into his arms.

"Ms. Merrick, how are you today?" Nathans deep voice invaded my senses and caused my heart to thrash around painfully in my chest.

Just keep going. Just keep walking.

And that's what I did. As difficult as it was, I walked right past him without a word uttered from my lips towards him. That isn't to say that Ben didn't have a few colorful words prepared for him.

"How do you think she's doing, asshole?" Ben's words were hushed but loud enough for me to hear him. "Don't even think about talking to her again. You fucked up and she's done."

Even as the words were coming out of his mouth, I felt my heart protest at Ben's words, worried that they might hurt Nathan even further.

How messed up does that sound?

He shatters my heart into a million, unrecognizable pieces and yet I'm still concerned about Ben hurting his feelings.

That's love for you all; confusing, painful, and ultimately fucked up.

"Ben, come on," I called out in a low voice and without looking back, I was on the move, my legs walking me up until I reached the safety of my seat.

"Bastard has the gull to ask how you're doing," Ben muttered begrudgingly to himself as he sat down in his seat next to me.

I Ignored Ben's grumblings as Mrs. Smith started up her lecture. As her words floated to the back of my mind, I allotted some time to myself to stealthily overlook Nathans appearance.

He was perched behind Mrs. Smiths desk grading papers or something of that sort when I noticed the familiar bags hanging under his eyes. His beard had also grown quite a bit in length and seemed quite untamed from it's normal trimmed nature.

I watched on haphazardly as Nathans fingers drummed against the desk, the same fingers that caressed my body lovingly, the same fingers that worked me tirelessly into orgasm after mind-blowing orgasm.

Abruptly, deep blue diamonds snapped up and connected with my hazelnut eyes. The connection rattled my insides and shot a bolt of misery through my heart.

His eyes pleaded with mine, shinning with what I once identified with as love. Now, I wasn't sure what to make of the look and steered my gaze back down to my notebook before I could think too much about it.

"You've got to consider the scene in which you're shooting as well as you set up your atmospheres. You aren't going to shoot an engagement series, for example, with two young people in love in a warehouse. You need to set up the atmosphere that best relates to their love and them as a couple. "

"Mr. McCoy, give us a set up example. What type of atmosphere would you set up for you and your girlfriend?"

I watched as Nathan's head snapped up to Mrs. Smiths, eyes wide as I'm sure mine were at the moment.

"Um," he stumbled over his words for a bit, his eyes flickering up to mine and settled there, his stare morphing into something intense that sent my heart into over drive.

"The atmosphere would be us. Just us. Because I know that the love we share is more powerful and serene than any other setting could possibly be. The colors would be bright and simplistic to symbolize the light and happiness that she brings into my life."

I could feel my chest constricting as I battled back the tears in my eyes that threatened to cascade down my cheeks, letting my weakness and heartbreak show openly for everyone to see.

"Without her... There is nothing. No light, no joy... Just emptiness. That's why the atmosphere for our photos would be nothing but us; because together, you feel like nothing could possibly get better. Like you couldn't possibly love any deeper... Our love is... Perfect, untouchable."

The room was uncomfortably silent as everyone took in his romantic confession. The only sound that could be heard and I prayed that only Ben could hear it, was my shaky breathing as I tried to contain my emotions.

"Wow, well if you ever do think about proposing to her, I think she'll have a difficult time saying no to such a sweet talker," Mrs. Smith said with a sly, yet, sweet smile.

"The thought has crossed my mind."

What?

"Holy shit," Ben exhaled out under his breath next to me.

My mind was racing, reeling from his admittance. It felt like my heart was breaking all over again if possible as my tears began to spill over and my chest heaved with every silent, rapid breath I took.

Nathan's eyes swept up to mine and crinkled in sadness as he took in my silent breakdown.

My attention was suddenly propelled backwards as I heard the two girls behind me begin to gossip.

"His girlfriend better hope that McCoy never leaves her. I swear she is the luckiest girl ever. I would be all over him if he was single."

Shit. It was happening.

A small sob tore through my lips and I bolted out of my seat, grabbing my bag and took off down the aisles, my feet slamming desperately against each step.

"Mrs. Merrick, where are you going? Mr. Grant sit down!"

I ignored Mrs. Smith's question as I reached the last step of the classroom and tore the door open, pushing my way out into the hallway.

"I'll go after her." I heard Nathan's voice say urgently just before the classroom door closed.

Oh, God no. Please don't let me be alone with him. I'm not strong enough.

My feet brought me further and further away from the classroom and the man that occupied. I was finally able to release the sobs that I had been holding back and let the tears flow as the longed too.

"Ms. Merrick!" A voice called out behind me in a jarred voice.

I knew who the voice belonged to and it only propelled my legs to drive harder and faster through the empty hallway.

"Ms. Merrick!"

The voice was getting closer.

"Alex!" My name came to my ears just seconds before a hand gripped at my wrist and forced my body backwards as I was spun around and dragged into a large, muscular body. His arms wrapped fully around my shaking body and against every outcry from my mind, I let my weight fall onto his awaiting body.

His hands were in my hair, soothing my cries with his touch as I gave into his embrace for just a moment. I would allow myself just a few seconds of his warm touch before forcing my heart back into the brutal reality of our situation.

My fingers dug into his shirt as I willed my tears to subside. His hands moved gently across my back in comforting manner.

"Please stop crying," Nathan whispered softly into my ear.

"Then stop hurting me."

Hot breath fanned across my shoulder as he secured his hold around me even tighter.

"I don't mean to. That's the last thing I would ever want to do," he spoke as his fingers continued to thread through my hair lovingly.

"Is it true?" I asked quietly, my cheek still pressed against his chest, my tears finally beginning to subside.

"What, minx?"

Gathering all of my strength, I pushed my hands against his chest and forced him to unwillingly release me from his hold.

"What you said. Have you really thought about it?" His eyes softened as he gazed at my curious eyes.

He nodded.

"I have. And I still do. I can't picture loving anyone else more than I love you. You're it, minx." He took a step towards me and raised a hand to my face, removing a piece of hair from my face and behind my ear. "You're my one."

How many times is this man going to break my heart within a weeks' time?

His words cut deep, the sincere look in his eyes even deeper. At one point, him telling me that I was his one and only would have made my heart leap and burst in joy, but now? It only ripped my beaten heart apart into tatters once again.

"I can't...I'm not."

"Yes you are. Please, Alex, you have to believe me," he spoke in a hushed tone, both of his hands gripping at both sides of my face.

"I've thought about it, I really have and it just doesn't add up, Nathan," I said with a weak shake of my head. "Where would Silvia have even gotten the drugs from?"

"I don't know but I do remember her bringing me coffee on that day and I did drink it." Nathan's eyes bore into mine, trying his hardest to make me believe his truth.

I cocked my head to the side with the new information. "She did?"

"Yes! That's the only thing I can think of... I told you I was done with drugs and I meant it. I would never lie to you, minx."

I brought my hands up in between our bodies and ran them across my face in frustration.

Should I believe him? Even so it still doesn't explain how Silvia would have gotten the drugs in the first place without raising suspicion.

"I don't know... There's just too many loose ends and then every time I close my eyes to try and sleep all I can see is you and her...kissing and your hands-"

"God, please don't finish that statement. It makes me sick to even think about it," he said with revulsion clear on his face. "There are so many other images and memories I want you to dream about...things like you and I in bed together." his fingers once again shifted to the back of my head, massaging my neck enticingly.

"Our bodies moving together, caressing, loving." He brought his lips closer to mine, his sweet breath floating across my face and invading my senses. My head began to drop back into his hand, placing his lips on level with my neck.

"I'd want you to dream about the first time I told you I loved you and how beautiful you looked that night." I felt his soft lips brush across the sensitive skin on my neck over the one spot that he knew was my weakness.

Oh, god. My endurance was waning with every caress of his lips over my flesh, every sweet word he spoke.

"Alex!"

I sprung apart from Nathan rapidly at the sound of Ben's voice echoing through the hallway.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get out here. Smith wouldn't let me out," Ben said as he walked up to me and passed Nathan with an extremely dirty look directed towards him.

"Come on. Let's go home. Smith said we were good for the day and she would send us the notes."

And with that Ben wrapped his arm around my waist and began to drag me down the hallway and away from Nathan before I had a chance to respond to any of the things that he said.

I managed to turn my head in Nathan's direction once more before being pulled through the double doors and out into the parking lot.

His stare connected to mine and it was evident that our small encounter had swelled up some small portion of hope within him hidden behind his pleading eyes. Unfortunately, I couldn't decide if the same was true for myself.

It wasn't much time after I got home before I was in my exercise clothing and out on my running path.

I ran with vigor, my feet taking me into the depths of the familiar path that I had been running for over a year in hopes of forgetting my pain and confusion for just one moment. I ran for peace, I ran for freedom, and I ran for answers.

Answers that hopefully would come to me with every pound of my sneakers on the sidewalk.

I rounded a corner with tall trees looming over the walkway, my veins coursing with pent up frustration and anger.

I didn't get but a few feet around the corner before being pulled back abruptly by an unseen arm. A rough cloth covered my lips and nose and the one time familiar smell invaded my every sense.

Chloroform.

Hey guys! What the hell just happened!? What do you think of it and what do you think will happen next?? Do you think Nathan got through to Alex at all? Please vote and comment your thoughts! I love hearing from you all :)

Thank you guys so much!