It has been two weeks since I met Jonny Riley. Sometimes my mind will still wander to ashamed thoughts of him, but I quickly distract myself. I cannot allow myself to ever think of him. Besides, life has kept me busy so I've had little time to dwell on things.

Since going to The Broadway Tower I have had two more business trips: one in Birmingham and the other in Manchester. I had to attend trade fairs and do some retail research whilst in the area, which for me, is one of my favourite parts of my job. I love walking around, checking out the weird and wonderful toy and gift shops hidden in many towns and cities. Some truly do manage to capture the magical wonderment of childhood fantasy.

Lydia had to stay back in the office, as we are incredibly busy at the moment. So I went alone, which I often do during the busy months of the year.

I'm currently planning for a trip to Bristol, in a few days, to attend a promotional trade fair. Lydia wants me to promote Magical Toys of Mason, to showcase a few of our products, and check out our competitors. Lydia needs to stay behind to monitor a big order coming in from overseas, so once again, I am going alone.

Often when I am home and not officially working, I like to research up and coming toys and gifts. Who is selling them and where? Most importantly, for how much? I'm passionate about what I do. It gives me a real buzz, something I have never felt before in a job. I never would have thought I would end up selling toys for a living. I was one of those dreamy girls who on the cusp of adulthood had no idea what she wanted to be when she grew up. My only interests at school were drama, PE, and English.

I had no desire to be an actress. I would have made a terrible gymnast. I loved English language and literature, but had no idea how to forge a career from it. In fact, the only thing I truly wanted to do; was sing. I knew I wasn't the greatest singer on the planet, but it made me happy doing it.

When I was a teenager, I actually remember telling a volunteer at Careers Advice that I was going to be a pop star. She stood there stony-faced and simply replied, "Really?" Sarcasm coated her one word, yet she had never even heard me sing. She never stopped to think that I really could be the next Mariah Carey. Instead, she chose to stamp upon any hopes and dreams that I had, and thoroughly enjoyed doing it, too! Okay, realistically, the chances of me ever making it as a pop star were pretty much zero, but would it have really killed her to have at least tried to encourage me in some way?

So just like that, my confidence was crushed. I quickly put the idea of becoming the next Madonna to bed. Jessica Neel was definitely NOT going to be a pop star.

Before marrying Shawn and having the girls, I tried my hand at a couple of short-lived jobs. One was working in a card shop, incredibly boring. The only highlight of my day was when friends popped in to see me, and using the till.

Then I worked as a support worker with adults who had learning difficulties. Much more rewarding and challenging, but when my mother died I stopped working. In fact, my life kind of stopped altogether.

Mum had cancer. From the day of her diagnosis to the day that she died, it took seven agonising months of watching the disease terrorise her mind, and ravage her body. I barely left her side. It was Shawn who was my rock throughout it all. When my darling mother took her last breath, I was with her, willing the one person who I loved more than anything to set herself free from the everyday hell that she was cocooned in. When Shawn came into the room, he knew she had gone. No words were said, yet he knew. I remember the warm relief Shawn's arms brought me against the intolerable pain of my own realisation that at the tender age of eighteen, my mum was no longer going to be in my life.

***

I'm at home on my laptop looking at all the different toy-shops in Bristol; the quirkier, the better, to visit during my trip. Shawn is busy in his study as he has a deadline to meet. I hear his footsteps coming down the stairs.

"Do you want a drink, Babe?" Shawn gently places his hands upon my shoulders.

I lovingly lean my head on his hand. "I'm good, thanks. I have my water bottle here. So, how are you getting on with that deadline?" I ask.

"I think I'm nearly there. Just editing it now. How about you, what are you up to?"

"I'm checking out shops in Bristol. If I have enough time I am going to have a look in a few. Some look really fab, actually," I tell him, looking excitedly down at my screen.

"Another night without my wife, whatever shall I do with myself?" Shawn looks to the ceiling, raising his eyebrows with a smile so warm and teasingly slanted.

With light sarcasm I reply, "I am sure you'll think of something."

He kisses my neck. "Actually, I think David and Robson are popping round for a few beers and a curry, when you're in Bristol, Babe, so I'll be in good hands."

"A boys night in, huh? When your dear wife is busy working so hard. Oh, and before I forget, Lissy is having a sleepover at Kathryn's. I think she is going straight from school, and Kathryn's mum will drop her back the following morning, so you'll only have Lottie home."

"Okay, Babe, but no doubt you will write it all down for me?" Shawn moves in slowly, kissing me softly on the lips.

I pat his chest. "I know you'll forget, that's why," I tell him with a playful scowl.

"You think of everything," he says.

"Because you forget everything." With a light-hearted, disapproving look I smile at him, chewing the top of my pen.

Shawn admits defeat with a nod and a little smile. "I had better get that article finished, Babe."

***

After my morning of successful research, booking my accommodation, and a few phone calls, I check my mobile for any messages. I have just the one from Lydia.

Morning Jessica

Listen, darling, do you think you can nip into the office if you have time today? I need to pass something by you.

Lydia xx

I respond immediately.

Hi Lydia

I can pop by. I'll be there in about 30 mins.

Jessica xx

I put away my laptop, placing my notes into my briefcase. Then I rush upstairs to Shawn's study. "Shawn, Lydia's just texted me. She wants me to nip into the office. I won't be too long."

"Oh, how come?" he asks, with a thoughtful frown pulling across his forehead.

"I haven't a clue. She said she wants to pass something by me," I say.

Shawn is twisting from side to side in his black leather swivel chair. "Mmm, sounds interesting."

"It does, doesn't it? Anyway, do you need anything in town?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks, Babe," he replies, swivelling back around. His attention now, back to his work.

"Right, I'll see you soon then." I quickly kiss the top of his head and rush out the door.

***

I'm driving along and for a change; it's a dry day with intervals of bright sunshine. My mood is high as the warm breeze brushes my cheeks. I have Will Smith booming in the car. At the traffic lights I am happily singing loudly to myself, when I notice a group of lads, about nineteen-years-old, all laughing and blowing kisses my way.

My cheeks redden. I honestly can't believe that I'm blushing because of a bunch of frisky bloody teenagers. Thankfully, the lights change to green and I drive forward, not before they all cheekily wink and wave at me.

Do they see a woman who is confident and happy, or a woman who is game on for a bit of adulterous fun? That dormant, yet consuming, self-doubt creeps into my cursed mind, about the person I really am, a married woman who constantly thinks about another man. Damn Jonny bloody Riley!

Soon enough, I am outside the office. I grab my bag and hurriedly walk into the building. When I walk into our office, Lydia is on the phone; her serious telephone expression greets me, but her face instantly brightens the moment she notices me. She waves and mouths, "Hello."

I stand looking out the large window. Looking down on Cheltenham town. Under the sun's rays, it looks colourful and alive. I turn around to check my in-tray. I scan the letters briefly. There is nothing that appears urgent, nothing at least that cannot wait another day. I glance at Lydia; she's deep in thought as she nods. Her arms are animated as she talks to whomever is on the other end of the line. I fetch myself a cup of water, and as I turn around, I see Lydia is now off the phone.

"Jessica, darling, sorry to call you in, but I really needed to talk to you." We both simultaneously sit down beside one another on the squishy black sofa.

"What's up, Lydia?"

"Well, as you know, the business has steadily been growing and doing well. It's now to the stage that we need to make a few changes. So, I am wanting you to consider whether you would be able to work four days instead of three? The thing is, if we employ another person to work here with us, it would mean another wage and having to move to a bigger office. That would mean more money for rent. Mason's Toys is ticking over beautifully, so I don't want to rock the boat with any major changes. Particularly in terms of how things are within the economy, at the moment. Of course, there will be times when you can do some things from home, like research etcetera, but tell me, do you think you would be in a position to take on extra work? I really don't think I can keep up with it all by myself." Lydia's eyebrow does its infamous high arch. Her eyes are wide, and her lips are pursed with anticipation.

"Obviously I would have to run it by Shawn, but yes, I think I would happily take on an extra day, Lydia," I answer.

"Oh, that is fabulous, darling," Lydia replies with a cheery smile.

I point at our comfortable little workspace. "Besides, we wouldn't want to leave our quaint little office, now would we?"

I could never imagine moving to another place. This is where Lydia and I have built up, The Magical Toys of Mason; this is where it all began. I also can't imagine someone else coming and working with us. It would change the dynamics. Lydia and I are quite a team. She's not only a fantastic boss; she's a wonderful friend.

"You are right, Jessica. I am quite attached to the little empire we have here, too. Also, it saves me the hell of having to advertise a vacancy, do interviews, and whatnot. You know you are my life saver, don't you?" Lydia rests her thankful hand on my shoulder.

"I think you'll find it's you saving me, Lydia. You have been so great over the past couple of weeks. I can't tell you how much I appreciate it," I return her sentiment.

"That's what friends are for, as they say, darling."

"So, how are things going between you and our Mr. Carter, then?" I ask.

"Surprisingly well, actually. He is a laid back, thoughtful and intelligent man. I have told him things I have never told anyone before." Watching Lydia swoon and turn all dreamy, in a matter of seconds, at the mere mention of Jake Carter is wonderful to see. Usually within a week she tires of any man; however, things between her and Jake are going really well. I only hope she doesn't freak when she becomes more aware of her feelings for him. Commitment has never been her strong point.

"That's really great, Lydia. I'm so pleased that things are going well. You deserve to be happy," I say.

"We are meeting again this weekend. He says he has a surprise trip planned. God only knows what that means, probably a ramble on the Moors or something?" she sweetly giggles.

"Now that, I'd pay to see," I laugh loudly as the vision of the beautiful, always in heels, Lydia Mason, wearing hiking boots, gaiters, carrying a rucksack and holding a big long walking stick, playfully runs through my mind.

"That's what I love about him though, I never know what to . . ." Lydia's voice trails off suddenly.

I look up to see what is wrong. Her mouth is wide open, and her eyes look like they are about to pop out of their sockets. I follow them to see what it is that has her so shocked and tongue-tied. Shit and fuckety fuck! There, in our office doorway, is Beef. His large physique barely fits through it, and his imposing frame shadows our small office. My heart is pounding. I can barely bring myself to speak from the shock.

"Beef . . . wh . . . what are you doing here?" I stutter.

"I'm sorry to bother you, Mrs. Neel, but Mr. Riley has requested you to see him, please?" Beef asks in a very formal manner.

"He's here? But . . . but how did you find me?" I stutter some more.

"Mr. Riley will explain everything. He wanted to come himself, but it's difficult, shall we say?" I understood Jonny Riley couldn't just pop into anywhere without causing a-frenzy. What I didn't understand is why he's here at all.

"Where is he then?" I question.

"He's waiting in the car outside, will you come?" Beef asks.

I look wild-eyed at Lydia. My stomach is doing flips. I can barely breathe, let alone think.

Lydia is smiling sympathetically. "Jessica, I think you had better go and see him."

"Which car is it, Beef?" I ask him, standing up nervously.

"I will walk down with you, and come back up here, if that's okay with you?" Beef glances over at Lydia.

"Sure, no problem." Lydia is slowly nodding her head, too shocked to question it.

"Okay, let's go." Beef faintly smiles at my compliance to walk with him to the car. I still sense that he's wary of me. He gives little away in terms of body language and facial expression. Yes, he's polite, but I get no warm, friendly vibe from him. I don't even know why it bothers me so much, yet it does.

I follow him as we pass all the other offices. Beef himself is causing quite a stir, judging by the looks of surprise on everyone's faces. I can't help but grin to myself as his massive, dominating frame barely fits through the corridors.

As soon as we step outside into the car park, Beef leads me right around the corner. It's quieter there, as it's the overflow car park for all the offices. I am so panicked, getting more nervous as we approach a black Mercedes Viano with privacy glass. I am nearing the point of hyperventilation. Get your shit together, Jessica!

"Here we are, Mrs. Neel, I will leave you now."

"Thank you, Beef." I need to compose myself before opening that door. Deep, deep breaths now, Jessica. I almost feel like I need to knock before I slide it open. My heart is beating so ridiculously fast; I fear I am actually going to pass out. Here goes nothing! Then I slide the door back, real bravely and quickly.

"Jessica! I didn't know whether you would come." A surprised, but relieved, Jonny Riley is smiling broadly; a smile which can weaken any red-blooded female. Those delicious hazel eyes are fixed on me as I cautiously step inside, sliding the door shut.

We both sit there in silence. An invisible, awkward atmosphere hovers above us. It feels like time has stood still and neither one of us is saying anything. I quickly become impatient. "What is this all about? How did you find me?" I feel my angry frown lines forming across my forehead. Real attractive, Jessica.

"I'm sorry, I really am not into the stalker thing, honestly, Jessica. I wrote you a letter, and hoped you would contact me. When you didn't, I thought maybe you didn't get it. So I contacted The Broadway, asked the name of Lydia's company and here I am!"

I snap, "I did get your letter, I just never responded."

"Oh, I see." He looks down at his feet in the footwell of the car. I can see he is confused and embarrassed. All I want to do is hold him, and tell him I'm sorry. I'm just no good at this hurting people crap. It makes me feel like shit. I feel awful knowing that I have hurt his feelings, just because he is affecting mine. I drop the titanium veil, which is protectively guarding my feelings.

"I am sorry, Jonny, I thought it best not to contact you at all. I didn't mean to sound so blunt, but you understand why, don't you?" I seek his eyes to gain contact with mine but he continues to look down at his feet.

"I understand, Jessica. I apologise for showing up like this. I really don't know what I was thinking." His hand reaches up to his hair, running his fingers through it in annoyance.

"It's okay, I am truly flattered. I would say that if any detective roles ever come your way, you now have more than enough experience to win that role hands down, stuff needing to audition," I giggle at my attempt to lighten the mood with my half-smile. His eyes brighten when he looks at me. He has this cute as hell, coy smile with his head tilted slightly, looking at me intensely. Shit, he looks so damn good!

"I have really missed you Jessica . . . and those dimples." I shyly look away as he tells me this. It feels like a bolt of electricity surging through my body when he takes my hand gently into his. His thumb strokes my, now trembling, hand as he speaks. "God knows I have tried to stay away, yet here I find myself. I know it's selfish, crazy, deluded and foolish . . . but I want you Jessica. I feel you in here, and I can't let that go," he says, placing our joined hands over where his heart is. "Do you have any feelings for me? I need to know, Jessica." He shifts closer by my side, he still has hold of my hand, and his eyes are trying to engage with mine.

I try to evade his pleading gaze. I know I'm already in deep shit just being here, in this car, holding his hand and denying to myself that I feel nothing. I'm just too emotionally exhausted to hide from it anymore. I finally admit defeat.

"Of course I have feelings for you. I have tried to ignore them and if the truth be known, I have been running from them ever since." That's it. I've gone and bloody said it now!
He quickly pulls me to him, replying. "So don't run from them . . . run with them, Jessica."

I shake my head. "I don't know what you want me to say, Jonny."

"Something is happening here, Jessica. Something that is bigger than you or me. I know it's not going to be easy, but I'm willing to try, if you are?" he says, cradling my face inside his soft hands. He then leans in, and places his sumptuous, smooth lips onto mine. This kiss binds us. It is slow, light, sensual, cherished and confirmation of our forbidden feelings for one another. "I have wanted this for so long . . . I didn't think I would ever see you again," he says; planting adoring kisses on my eyelids, my nose, my chin, my eager mouth.

I can only whisper. "What are we doing, Jonny?"

"I don't know and I don't care." His mouth is now on mine and his kisses are more desperate and wanting. Our tongues search for the other, dancing and playing between hot, fevered kisses. My whole body wants him as his kisses rain down on me. Our breathing is fast and furious. I move around and straddle him as he sits back more comfortably in the leather seat. With abandonment, I kiss every part of his face and neck. I breathe in his musky, manly scent while rubbing my jawline into the crook of his neck, wanting the smell of him all over me. My mouth teases him with erotic nibbles along his jawline. A throaty groan escapes him as I gently suck his earlobe. The tip of my excited tongue is enticingly caressing him. I am finally letting go and to see this beautiful man writhing beneath me is such a fucking turn-on. The suppressed ache I feel for him needs to be set free. It has found its way out, and now needs him with an unforgiving appetite. I couldn't stop this now, even if I tried. His hands are entangled in my hair, pulling it, teasing it with his fuckable fingers. I bite his lip. I want to taste him, savour all of him, feel him all over me.

His heavy breath lightly fans my face. "Oh, Jessica, I don't want to fuck you in here."

"Why ever not?" I plead.

"It's too small . . . and it's too public."

"No . . . one . . . can . . . see." I kiss him between each word. Now that I've started, I don't want to ever stop kissing him!

He caresses my face with his tender thumbs. "I want you where I can see all of you; every beautiful, and incredible part of you in a place that is more appropriate and comfortable. What we are doing is bad enough, so let's not do it like this Jessica . . . not in the back of a car."

Breathlessly, I stop to look at him. "Seriously?" I ask in disbelief.

Jonny smiles, a sexy serene smile. "Seriously. We have plenty of time to fuck, make love, shag, do it, whatever you want to call it . . . I just wanted to see you today. To be with you and to know you want to be with me," Jonny struggles with his words as he caresses my face.

"I do. It was a struggle to admit it . . . but I really do, Jonny."

"So, now we have established we like each other . . . a lot, and would indeed like to have sex. When can I see you again?" His rakish eyes look me up and down, two hazel predators penetrating me.

"In a few days' time I am going to Bristol for an overnight stay for work, maybe then?" I ask, surprised by my own bold and audacious proposition.

"I have a lot coming up this week: script meetings, an audition, along with the usual interviews, etcetera. But I'll make sure we get to see each other. What I'll do is contact you with details of the hotel that Erin will sort out for us."

"Who is Erin?" I ask.

"She's my PA, she sorts out most things for me, and she will certainly free up my time to schedule in many pleasures with a certain Mrs. Neel." He playfully pulls me into him.

"Blonde, with a face like a slapped ass?" I smugly ask.

Jonny laughs. "I guess that's a good summation of Erin."

"Ahhhh Miss Sour Puss, I vaguely remember seeing her at the Broadway."

"Miss Sour Puss? I am sure she would be delighted to hear that you think so highly of her. She's not one to smile much, I know, but she's bloody good at her job," Jonny replies.

"I'm sure she is, she would scare people into submission."

"You'll grow to like her Jessica, I am sure." Jonny tells me.

"We shall see, I suppose? So this hotel meet, how will it work? Obviously I can't just go up to reception and ask to go to your room, can I?" I pepper him with questions.

"I'm not sure yet, maybe Erin will book two rooms? My room and one in her name. When you check in you can use her name, then no one is any the wiser. We'll sort something out, don't you worry," his voice is reassuring.

"It would seem you've thought this through, or are you an expert at this sort of thing?" My paranoid mind races at the thought of him being accustomed to this kind of deception.

Jonny holds me tightly against him. "I always use a different name to check into hotels. There are crazy fans out there that ring the hotels up and ask if Jonny Riley is staying there. Then they try and actually get into the hotel, it can be mad at times."

"Sounds like bloody hard work, does it not exhaust you having to be one step ahead of everyone all the time?" I ask.

He quickly shakes his head. "Not anymore, this is my life now. Most of it is common sense and sticking with those you love. They are the ones who keep you grounded in this game."

"It must be difficult to trust anyone, though?" I ask, studying his divine face.

Jonny thinks for a second. His thumb brushing lightly over his sexy closed mouth. "It is hard. I've had to learn the hard way quite a few times. I try to keep my private life private. Be polite to my fans and the public. While keeping my friends and family close, they are the ones who keep me sane. I think the day you start living your life in a bullshit bubble, and believing your own hype, is the day it's game over," he confesses.

"How come a gorgeous, charming, intelligent, caring and famous man, such as yourself, has not yet married or at least settled down?" I dread the thought of Jonny being with someone else, but I need to know more about him.

"I don't know. I just haven't met anyone special enough, I suppose?" he pauses. "Until you." He places the back of my hand on his lips, gently kissing the tips of my fingers. Such little things he does, I find so very erotic. I close my eyes and smile, enjoying the feeling of his hot mouth on my fingertips.

He throws a sexy look my way. "Your dimples make me want to fuck you, but I won't . . . yet." His eyes are hooded with lustful promise.

I pout seductively, hovering over his mouth. "That's too bad." Our lips crash together, fervently locked with intermittent moans of pleasure. Our bodies press into one another, begging to be as one.

Jonny's hands gently push me back. "Jessica . . . Jessica . . . listen, you need to get back and I need to go. Shit, I can't believe I am actually saying this, but now is not the time."

"Okay . . . okay . . . I'll leave you alone now." I drop my face in what can only be described as pure sexual frustration.

"Hey! I don't want you to ever leave me alone." A serious look spreads across his beautiful face as he strokes my cheek. I perk up with his sensuous touch.

"In just a few days . . . you are so getting some, Mr. Riley." I lean into his body, looking at him with hungry, vixen eyes.

"I can't wait, Jessica Neel." His eager erection can be felt through his dark denim. Don't I know it! I manage to peel myself away from him. I need anything to distract me from his obvious hard-on.

"I had better give you my mobile number, I'll write my work number down, too." I tell him as I'm fishing around in my bag, looking for one of my business cards and a pen.

"I will text you with the details of Bristol, as soon as I know," Jonny says., taking out his phone and tapping in a number.

"Beef, you can come back down, now." Jonny quickly puts his phone back in his pocket and sits back, looking at me with a confident, crooked grin.

I stroke his face, now that I feel I am allowed to. "I can't wait to see you in Bristol and thank you for coming all this way to find me. I'm so glad you did."

"Thank you, Jessica, for seeing me. I really didn't think you would. It's going to be okay, you know? You and me, I mean," Jonny stumbles over his words to me.

I move in for a lingering 'goodbye for now' kiss. I don't think I will ever tire of kissing those wonderful lips.

I then open the door and with a wry grin I reply, "Maybe, you are right." I walk along the car park feeling light and giddy, putting one airy foot in front of the other . . . a feeling I had forgotten existed.

So this is me. I am now, officially, a cheating wife. For all of the million wrong reasons that tell me I shouldn't be doing this, I can only think of one reason why I should . . . Jonny Riley.

*HEY LOVELIES.... WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE IN JESSICA'S SHOES, HUH?
REMEMBER .... IF YOU LIKEY, VOTEY!!
MWAH XXXXX