Same thing as my other story, this is gonna be the point where my story gets into some topics that aren't exactly... nice. So prepare yourself for that.

TW: Literally over half the chapter is suicidal thoughts and talking about suicide attempts

At the beginning it seems like fluff but guess what? (you: what?) it's not....

Connor remembered taking the pills. He remembered passing out in the park. He remembered the overwhelming loneliness he felt.

Connor didn't want anyone else to feel that pain.

***

"Okay, Evan, spill. Why did you wanna come to the orchard?" Connor asked. They both had ice cream cones in one hand, and with the other, they held each other's hands.

"I... I wanted to give you s-something. A-and I know i-it's super, um, stupid, b-but it took me a really long time to... to pick it out. And I think you-you'll like it."

"Evan, you haven't stuttered that much since our first kiss. What the hell is going on?" Evan took a deep breath and reached in his pocket.

"I-it's nothing much, you'll p-probably think I-I'm stupid f-for this," Evan said. "S-sorry I'll get to the p-point." He pulled two silver rings out of his pocket. Nothing super fancy, but Connor was still heavily questioning things and Evan didn't say a word.

"Evan?"

"P-promise rings. Y'know. I-it's like a-an engagement to... to be engaged. Wh-when we're old enough, that i-is." Connor stared at Evan, a small smile growing on his face. "S-sorry, you probably think I'm a-an idiot."

"That's amazing." Evan fumbled with the rings for a moment before handing Connor one that had 'Bros' engraved on it. "Why does it say 'bros'?"

"B-because m-mine says, um, 'trees'. A-and wh-when I fell out of the tree... th-that was sort of, I dunno, the beginning of our r-relationship. A-and since we hang out at the, um, orchard a lot?" Connor wrapped Evan in a hug. Evan buried his face in his boyfriend's neck.

"I love you so much, Ev," Connor said, not really thinking about what he said. His voice was muffled, as he was resting his head on Evan's, but Evan heard it loud and clear and warning bells went off in his mind.

"W-what?"

"I love you." Connor said, pulling away from the hug and sliding his ring onto his finger. Evan did the same.. "What, you can propose to propose, but I can't say I love you?"

"N-no, it's fine, I was just...."

"Surprised. It's fine. Hey, now that you have your cast off, can we climb a tree?" Connor asked. "Or are you scared after you fell?" he added after noticing Evan's nervous expression.

"I didn't fall," Evan mumbled.

Connor dropped his ice cream. "Wait, what?"

"I didn't fall."

"I heard you loud and clear, what the fuck is that supposed to mean, Hansen?" Evan looked down. "Evan?"

"I let go of the branch." Connor stared. "I'm so sorry I shouldn't have... you were happy and I just ruined it, I'm just gonna go." Evan turned around, but Connor grabbed his shoulder and pinned him against a tree.

"No, no, no, Hansen, explain. Just... just tell me why you did it." Connor tried to maintain his calmness. He was angry, but he didn't want Evan to think it was about him. Connor was angry at all the fucked up shit in the world that made people like Evan try to commit suicide. (same tbh the world is shitty)

"I don't know," Evan said, sitting down against the tree. Connor crouched down to his level and just held him. "I just felt so alone, then. A-and I couldn't find another foothold, but I kept searching a-anyways. I just thought... y'know m-maybe it's a sign th-that I was just meant t-to leave." His voice was shaky, and there were tears running down his face.

"Shh, you don't have to talk about it unless you want to."

"I-I do, Connor, I want you to know, I don't want to l-leave you with no e-explanation. C-Connor I regret it s-so much I s-swear; I mean what if I.... What if I had died?"

"Hey, don't think like that, alright, I get it too, alright, I... I was there, and it's hard, and I'm still that way sometimes, but it's never a better option to... to die." Now there were two boys holding each other, being each other's shoulders to cry on.

"Let's go get some ice cream, Ev."

"But we just–"

"No buts, we're getting ice cream."

***

"Hey, Ev?" Connor said, sitting across from his boyfriend in the ice cream parlor, 'A 'La Mode' near the orchard.

"Hm?" Evan responded.

"How about we just... forget about everything that happened?"

"What?"

"We don't need to focus on the bad stuff. The suicide attempts, all of that? Let's keep the past buried away in the past for now."

Evan smiled. "Sounds good to me."

I'm sad now

Fuck whoever wrote this they must be a bitch

ಥ_ಥ ~ The Seven Seas (just kidding there's only one of me... or is there *cue x files music or whatever it is idk*)