"If you follow me, dinner will be served."

Naomi joined Greg in the dining room with a hop in her step, although she tried not to spill their drinks. She set them on the tablecloth. Greg came up behind her to pull out her chair, and his fingertips grazed her shoulders as he pushed her in, sending tingles down her arms.

"Thank you."

"Anytime." He settled into his seat with a quivering smile. "I hope the meal is to your liking."

"You have watched me devour 7-11 taquitos and love every second. It doesn't take much to impress me."

"Now you're making me nervous. If you don't like this, my cooking must be..." He stared into the candle's flame.

Naomi reached across the table to hook her fingers in his. "I love food, and it looks and smells amazing. Plus, even if it was bad, who cares? It's still an incredible night together."

"Thanks." He took a drink of his caesar and looked at her with what seemed like a forced smile, but she presumed it reflected his feelings toward himself more than her.

She cut off a piece of chicken and closed her eyes as she savoured the flavour. The meat was tender, and the sauce swirled with creamy, cheesy heartiness with a kick of heat. "So you may have to cook this on every date because it's amazing."

His eyebrows raised, and his cheeks dimpled. "Yeah?"

She took another bite, which delivered more tanginess from the sun-dried tomatoes. "Definitely. Even if it's not a restaurant, I can take some home, right?"

"Phew, good. And yes, if you like it that much." He ate some chicken and pressed his lips together as he chewed. "It's not missing anything?"

"It's missing being in my belly."

He laughed and consumed more. "All points to my mom for this one."

"Nah, this was an 80/20 split in your favour."

"To think this stressed me out all week."

"Why stress? I'm excited about going out with you. The meal's a bonus."

"It's just... never mind." He fixated on his plate instead of her.

"You can tell me." She cut into the asparagus and ate it. "Damn, this is amazing too."

He chuckled before his expression fell again. Only one person caused him this much anxiety lately.

"It's Tara, isn't it?"

The way he made his mouth small enough to disappear told her she was correct. So he was thinking about Tara during their date, a date when Naomi was more comfortable with him. It wasn't what she wanted to hear, but Tara and Greg had broken up less than a month ago. Dating someone else would be weird so soon after. Naomi had a quiet period after relationships, spending time with friends and getting lost in sports and hobbies to find herself for months or a year. She'd joined the softball team after her last long-term relationship ended because she needed to channel her break-up fury.

Greg didn't seem to use the sports method. He flung that anger at himself. Perhaps they could hit up the batting cages later to help him out.

"I wish I could say it wasn't."

Naomi sipped her caesar. "At least you're honest about it. I might be your date tonight, but I'm also your friend. If you need to talk, we'll hit pause on the date and start it up when you're done."

He cut into his chicken. "No, that's not fair to you."

"I'm here for all of you Greg: the adorably sweet man who poured his feelings into this delicious meal, the competitive one who challenges me at softball, and the vulnerable guy who can't snap his fingers and be over a woman he was in love with after a few weeks."

"I thought about you when I was with her. Wondered if I'd made a mistake not waiting for you after your last relationship."

Those words made Naomi's heart soar, but they couldn't gloss over Greg's pain if he was going to move past it. "You were happy and in love with her too. It's brutal when someone dismantles that."

A knife clanged as it fell onto his plate. He shielded his eyes from her with his hand. "I'm trying so hard not to fuck this up, Nomi. But that's all I'm good at."

"You're not. This makes relationships work, the messy, emotional openness. Not pretending everything's fine and trying to impress each other to forget that it's not."

"You deserve more." His voice cracked.

"More than what, a beautiful and delicious candlelit dinner? A man who has supported me for over a decade? Who joined a softball team without hesitation, even with his hectic work schedule because I was a mess after my heartbreak? Who promised me tropical vacations before he knew I had feelings for him?"

He exhaled and met her gaze again with glassy eyes. "I suppose when you put it that way..."

"That's how I see us. I know there'll be residual Tara feelings because I was too impatient to wait. I feared another opportunity for us to be together would vanish again, so I rushed, which isn't fair to you either."

"Technically, I laid down my cards first."

"I started it."

"Which I also ruined."

Naomi tried not to cringe. It had been painful until Kieran had distracted her. "I should have waited until you were sober. But it doesn't matter because we're here, together."

He took her hand. "You are next-level understanding."

"It's because I like you so much." She said it in a teasing tone but meant every word. From the manner Greg caught her eye, she sensed he understood.

"You want to ditch supper and do something a lot more fun?"

His eyes dipped to the trace of cleavage she'd allowed herself, and he bit his bottom lip, making her skin tingle. While part of her longed to recapture their closeness in the kitchen, they hadn't discussed her asexuality. She risked being pushed into an awkward corner because he wasn't over Tara yet.

"I... um." She swallowed and tried to look anywhere but Greg, but realizing that was worse, she met his intense gaze. "It'd—it'd be a shame to waste this amazing food."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm enjoying the dinner and talking to you."

"Sorry." His cheeks went red. "I thought you were hinting that..."

Naomi shook her head and cut more meat off the chicken thigh. "I really like you. I'm just..."

"Wanting to take things slowly like you already told me last week..." His jaw hardened. "I've messed up again."

She let out a breath of relief. "It's okay. My definition of slow and other people's are different."

"What's your slow?"

"Right now, I enjoy cuddling, kissing, and hugging. And in a few months, maybe more. It's not a science."

It had taken her eight months of dating to lose her virginity, more out of curiosity and feeling like it was the natural next step as a couple and a young adult than anything else. In her second relationship, she'd gotten it down to six months. They'd been open about each other's needs, which had helped a lot. She didn't hate or fear sex. She just had a hundred other things she'd rather do, which most men found insulting.

"Months? Is it something I said or did?"

Naomi shook her head, although his response was a little disheartening as if her needs were a punishment. "That's how my body works."

He took a bite of asparagus. "Cool."

"If that's a problem," she inhaled, "please tell me. It'll be easier to hear now than later. And you won't be the first person to admit that either."

Instead of answering straight away, he chewed his lip and studied her face.

Her stomach sank. It killed her a relationship could succeed in countless ways and fail over one detail while so many otherwise flawed relationships worked despite glaring problems as long as people were compatible sexually. She and her ex, Luke, had connected over their vision of their futures, their interests, sense of humour, and friend circles, as they'd tried to navigate the waters of her asexuality. But after a year and a half, he'd missed connecting during intimacy too much to commit to a future without that sexual chemistry. The aspect she had no control over.

After at least ten agonizing seconds, Greg held her hand and squeezed it. "I've already waited a decade. A few months won't kill me."

Naomi knew she should fully explain her asexuality and its implications for their future, but the nail-biting amount of time it took him to answer the prospect of waiting was all the stress her heart could take tonight.

***

Poor Naomi and Greg just can't have nice moments, but at least she's sharing part of the truth with him. How do you think he'll react when she's fully honest?