Most of the Warrior Cats characters ahead are not mine and are in the original series. Credit goes to the Erin Hunters for them.

Abandoningkit rolled around the forest on his belly, without a list to not read because he can't, pondering how to solve all the cat's problems in 9 days.

Brookbirdie still hadn't come back within a day after when he slapped him as if many people thought they were sexier than mighty Abandoningkit.

It was all going wrong.

The first thing he thought of was to try to call back the fat cat.

"OI, FAT CAT, GET YOUR SMUG BUTT OVER HERE AND HELP A GOD OUT!"

Hundreds or possibly thousands of birds flapped clumsily out of the trees. But other than that, there was no response.

"I'll fire you!"

"Get down here!"

"I need help!"

"Why are you so stubborn?!"

"Help me!"

Abandoningkit groaned, "Guess I'm on my own then". He looked down at his massive stomach, before letting out another groan.

"I can't do ittt" He wailed, "Why can't someone do it for me?"

His belly wriggled as half of the babies pushed down to the bottom of his stomach and started walking forwards. Abandoningkit started to roll.

"No no no no no!" He cried, before his head got crushed. Then it popped out again.

"I'm not a hamster wheel you little-"

Abandoningkit rolled down a big drop, landing with a crunch.

"Where am I?" He groaned, looking ahead of him.

Many cats stood ahead of him, clearly in a sign of worship. At least that's what he thought until one ginger cat piped up. "Uhm, who are you and what are you doing in our camp?"

Abandoningkit narrowed his eyes, "I demand to speak to your leader!"

A sandy she-cat with emerald eyes spoke next. "You just squashed her"

"Well, I demand to speak to your deputy?"

"She was choosing our deputy" The sandy cat rolled her eyes.

"Maybe you could choose our new leader and deputy?" A golden-brown tabby apprentice meowed uncertainty, suddenly being met with yowls of protest.

"It killed Bluestar!" A black and white apprentice hissed, baring his teeth, "Why should we trust it with anything?!"

"You know Yellowfang is out, Swiftpaw." A big white tom meowed calmly. Everyone became silent, it was obvious this cat was important, "There's no harm in letting it choose. It probably was sent from StarClan"

All the cats calmed down at those words, all except Swiftpaw.

"Hah, no way! This is ridiculous, I'm out!" Swiftpaw stomped out the clearing.

"Well then!" Abandoningkit boomed. "I know exactly who to choose to be the next leader, as I was sent from StarClan". He surveyed the cats before pointing a talon at a sleek black and grey tom.

"You!" He cried dramatically, "Will be the next leader"

"Me?!" The cat said in disbelief.

"Yes you!"

The tom was still in shock as he claimed up the rock.

"Now, what's your name?"

"Darkstripe"

"Well, you will go to the Moonstone and shall be known as Darkstar!"

"Well, actually, I don't believe in StarClan"

Abandoningkit paused, staring at the new leader.

"As you should, it'd give me less chores!" Abandoningkit chuckled, before rolling out. The ginger warrior and a long-haired grey warrior sat in shock.

"Goodbye something or other clan!"