"We humans are so tortured by not properly guessing what will make us happy."  Teddy once told him

Matthew, barely seventeen at the time, had furrowed his brow. "What does that even mean?"

"Humans, Matthew, will let happiness slip through their fingers, tortured by the concept of it."

"What does that have to do with me?" Matthew had asked, his face scrunching up in confusion. Teddy had watched the medics insert the replacement rod into Matthew's arm in the infirmary, the same rod that controlled the breeding of the soldiers at Allegiant.

"This lifestyle is not sustainable for happiness, and you need to see how your capabilities are affected by the way you close off and sleep with women," Teddy had replied.

"So this is about sex?" Matthew had grinned, amused by the way Teddy rolled his eyes. "My sex life?"

Teddy had leaned in closer, his expression serious. "Listen to my words, boy. One day, you will understand the difference between this conversation and my advice to you. You are so tortured by not properly guessing what will make you happy."

***** *****

The memory of that conversation now echoed in Matthew's mind as he stood outside the club with Eko, his heart still pounding from the confrontation and the kiss. Teddy's words resonated more deeply than they had back then.

Was he truly letting happiness slip through his fingers? Was he, like Teddy said, tortured by the concept of happiness, unable to grasp what it truly meant for him?

Matthew looked at Eko, her face illuminated by the soft glow of the streetlights. She was more than just a fleeting desire; she was someone who stirred something deep within him, something he hadn't fully understood until now.

***** *****

As the crisp air brushed against Eko's face, she pulled away from him, spinning into the street amidst people still attempting to enter the club and amidst dancing, intoxicated couples who had lost themselves in the moment.

The only sober individuals were soldiers and cadets who had witnessed their headmaster leave the club with Eko in tow. In a matter of minutes, their relationship had become viral, captured by soldiers with their phones and shared on their social media accounts.

As the couple moved away from the crowd, the soldiers gawked, stared, and pointed, while Eko twirled and danced farther away from the prying eyes. Matthew urged her along the streets, desperate to escape the growing crowd's raised voices, now cheering them on with wild whistles.

They were now exposed, out in the open, and he knew that by morning, a plethora of rumors about them would spread, with the fan club likely hunting her down like wild, erratic creatures.

But that was a problem for tomorrow. For now, it was just the two of them, and he needed to address their relationship once and for all.

Breaking away from the crowd, they put much-needed distance between themselves and the onlookers, moving out of earshot from his soldiers. Eko stopped, feeling nauseated and her head spinning uncomfortably. Matthew quickly noticed her unsteadiness, her vision affected as though she was seeing double of everything.

Matthew swiftly wrapped his arm around Eko's waist, guiding her down the street until they found a secluded alleyway, away from prying eyes and ears.

"Eko," his voice was gentle, "don't faint on me, okay?"

"I think... I think I've just had too much to drink," she replied weakly, managing a smile.

They halted in the alleyway, his arm still around her waist, holding her close. With one hand at the small of her back, he pulled her closer, while the other lifted her chin, tipping her head back.

"Has the world stopped spinning for you?"

"It's been spinning so fast," she whispered. "I barely know what I'm doing anymore."

He tightened his hold on her and slipped his hand into her hair, holding her head in place.

"I know what you mean," he said firmly, his breath mingling with hers, carrying the scent of tequila. He trailed gentle kisses along her jawline and up to the side of her mouth, causing Eko's heart to beat faster than ever as his lips moved over her own.

"Fuck me," she said suddenly, breaking away from the kiss to look up at him.

"Are you begging?" He smirked, then resumed his butterfly kisses along her mouth and down her face to her throat and neck. She moaned softly, her head rolling backward to allow him further access.

"I'm begging," her voice was hoarse, her body igniting as his mouth continued its descent.

"Please, God, don't make that sound," he requested when she moaned louder, trying to maintain control despite his desire for her.

"But I love how you kiss me," she said, utterly seductive, unable to resist the pleasure he was giving her.

"Do you love this?" he moaned, his hand slipping between her legs, cupping her sex as she squirmed under his touch.

The atmosphere between them changed instantly, charged with electricity. Eko's breathing quickened as her heart raced. He pushed her backward, and she collided with the brick wall of a café among the deserted, darkened streets of the alleyway, staring at her like a predator eyeing his prey

"I fucking love this," Eko bit her lip, watching him as he tugged at her underwear and his fingers filled her, causing her to gasp in pleasure, urging him to continue his beautiful assault on her body.

Matthew's eyes darkened with lust as he watched her reaction, his own arousal evident. He pressed his body against hers, his mouth trailing hot kisses down her neck, his teeth grazing her skin, sending shivers down her spine. She moaned louder, her hands tangling in his hair, pulling him closer.

His fingers moved expertly, teasing and exploring, pushing her closer to the edge with every touch. Eko's hips bucked against his hand, seeking more, needing more. "Matthew," she gasped, her voice breathy and desperate.

Then, he grabbed her wrists with his free hand in a vise-like grip above her head, pinning her to the wall using his hips to keep her in place. Eko moaned louder as his mouth claimed hers again, his tongue parting her lips to explore her expertly. Her tongue tentatively stroked his, and they joined in a slow, sensual dance.

His erection pressed against her belly, aching to have all of her in every way possible. His movements became more urgent, his fingers working her with a rhythm that made her body arch into his touch, forcing her orgasm to build. Eko was reduced to babbling words and pleas for release.

"That's right," he moaned into her mouth, the thought of pushing her over the edge driving him wild. Releasing her wrists, his arm quickly went around her waist. Eko's hands went for his pants, desperately trying to undo his buttons to free him.

"Say you want this," she moaned in command, undoing the first button, almost ripping his pants open. Her hands reached his briefs, tugging them down to free him. In an instant, she felt his arm around her waist, now reaching for her leg and pulling it around his own waist.

With one leg holding her up, Eko leaned into him. She could feel his hardness against her, yearning for her at the apex of her thighs. With her underwear now torn away by his greedy fingers, he positioned himself at her entrance, waiting for her to beg him to fuck her.

"Go on," she bit down on her lip, watching him. He teased her by pushing his cock just inside her entrance, and she moaned, trying to keep her resolve together. Every part of her was so sensitive and swollen that she was ready to explode if he kept teasing her like that.

The world around them disappeared, leaving only the intense connection between them. The alleyway, the distant sounds of the city—all of it faded away, replaced by the raw desperation of their growing moans.

"Say it, baby," he urged, his voice husky with desire as he pulled back slightly before pushing forward again, his movements becoming more urgent and fervent.

Eko's body was aflame with need, every nerve ending alive and electrified. Her mind was lost in the intensity of the moment, the world around her fading into obscurity as she focused solely on the man before her.

"I swear I'm gonna come," she gasped, her voice filled with desperation. He knew she was on the brink, her body trembling with anticipation. With a deep, primal groan, he filled her completely, wanting to push her over the edge, to make her lose control completely.

Eko's scream of ecstasy filled the alleyway as he began to move, each thrust sending her higher and higher until she was consumed by overwhelming pleasure. She felt all of him like never before, so desperate and carnal that she swore she was about to burst from her seams.

"Keep going," she urged, "don't stop." She was trying not to come, trying to hold out as long as humanly possible. His mouth found her neck, trailing kisses and gentle bites along her skin, sending shivers down her spine. She tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling him closer, wanting to feel him deeper inside her.

He drove into her with relentless passion. The exquisite feeling of his relentless pounding made her tilt her head back, closing her eyes to relish the sensation. He pulled back and then moved into her again, so slow and tantalizingly sweet. This time, Eko rolled her head forward to him, gasping in cries of ecstasy as she felt herself unraveling, her body clenching around him.

"Don't come yet, not until I say," Matthew commanded, kissing his way up her neck, savoring the taste of her skin before capturing her lips in a passionate, devouring kiss. Eko surrendered to him completely, her body molding to his as they moved in perfect harmony. Her desire for his complete surrender grew, and she couldn't help but urge him on.

"Beg for it," she moaned against his lips. She needed his surrender, she craved it.

As their rhythm intensified, Eko gripped his shoulders tightly, her nails digging into his skin. Her moans mingled with his, filling the alleyway with the sounds of their raw passion. Matthew's movements grew more desperate, each thrust deeper and more powerful than the last.

"I want you..." she gasped, her body trembling with anticipation. "t-to ...beg for it,"she demanded, her voice high and needy. Hearing him moan and hiss in ecstasy turned her on even more, knowing his orgasm was building. She felt his fingers tighten around her waist, his hips driving into hers with increasing urgency. The tension between them grew, each moment bringing them closer to the edge.

"Be a good girl and come," he growled, his words sending a shiver down her spine. It was a command she couldn't resist, a primal urge that consumed her completely.

"No, no," she protested weakly, feeling the surge of her impending orgasm.

He wasn't himself in that moment, having lost control weeks ago, maybe even months, and it was all because of the woman in his arms. 

"I want you to come, so I can fuck your sweet pussy as hard as I want," he moaned into her ear, his words igniting a fiery response in Eko. With a cry of ecstasy, she surrendered to the pleasure, her body shaking with the force of her release. 

Her orgasm scorched through her like a fiery sun, a rapture pouring down around her. She was so consumed with his relentless rhythm that she savored each push and pull. When he shoved his tongue down her throat, she moaned out to the heavens from such a cathartic release.

"You're so fucking tight for me," he groaned, and any remaining coherence shattered as he fucked her against the wall with such force that it rattled her bones.

Everything blurred, and her nails scraped down his back, her body arching against him, craving every inch of him. She was all squeals and whimpers, mingling with his grunts and the pounding music in the far distance. Her entire body was a sensory overload, and she wanted more—no matter how much she took, it was never enough.

Matthew's control was slipping, his pace erratic and desperate. He buried his face in her neck, his teeth grazing her skin as he lost himself in the moment. The intensity between them was unbearable, and with one final, relentless assault, Eko screamed out her never-ending release. She felt him still, his cock throbbing and pulsating between her thighs as he spilled into her, the orgasm washing over her in a dizzying crescendo of sensation.

As he stilled, she clung to him, her fingers digging into his back, holding him close as she rode out the waves of relentless pleasure crashing over her. His chest was pressed against hers, his heart pounding in sync with her own, their bodies fused together.

For a moment, time seemed to stand still as they clung to each other, the world around them fading into insignificance. Eko's breathing slowly returned to normal, her body still humming with the aftershocks. She opened her eyes to find him gazing down at her, and a smirk tugged at her lips

"That was... nice," she teased, her voice breathless and hoarse.

Matthew chuckled softly, his forehead resting against hers. "There's that word again," he teased, pressing his lips to hers once more.

"Hmm," she smiled, feeling her leg release its grip from his waist. Eko quickly pulled her dress down, covering herself again, while he readjusted his clothes and composed himself.

As they stood in the alley, an awkward silence settled between them. The distant music pulsing through the streets was the only sound breaking the stillness. The alley, once a hidden retreat, now felt exposed and stifling.

"You know we can't keep doing this," Eko whispered, leaning against the brick wall with her arms folded across her chest, studying him intently. There were so many variables she hadn't considered until this moment. Being a crystal warrior brought constant danger, and her greatest worry was how he would react if he knew the truth about who she really was. The fear of rejection, the danger she faced daily, and the secrets she kept weighed heavily on her mind. She wondered if their connection could survive under the burden of her reality.

Matthew's expression tensed, his eyes darting between hers, searching for understanding. "Doing what exactly?" he asked.

Her fingers tightened into her skin. "I mean, whatever this has become between us, neither of us can continue like this. We've crossed a line with this."

You got to be fucking kidding me, his mind mused as he stared at her. His heart pounded in his chest, confirming his worst fears. All he could muster was a strained, "I know... I know," as his default response.

"Can you do it?" Her tone was calm, her head suddenly sober.

"Let you go?" His brows furrowed, trying to remain composed, to not let her see how much her words were affecting him. He wanted to come out of this with some form of dignity. Because that, he realized, was a goodbye if he had ever seen one, with the way she was standing there, looking at him.

With those three words, Eko sighed, her eyes softening as she looked at him. "Matthew, this... whatever this is, it's not healthy. It's not sustainable. We both know that. Right?" Her voice wavered slightly, betraying the internal struggle she felt.

"Eko, look ... I-I," he began, struggling to find the words. His head was spinning, and the mix of tequila and vodka was really starting to affect him. He felt like his breath had been knocked out of him. "L-look ... I'm not good at—"

"No," she said, raising her hand to stop him, a fragile smile on her lips. She could see the pain in his eyes, the vulnerability he was trying to hide. Realizing that he was breaking up with her, that this was the speech, she felt a sharp pang in her chest. "Don't, please." Eko turned away, ready to walk, as she pushed off the wall.

Matthew closed his mouth, sensing that Eko didn't want to hear it. She didn't want him to tell her that he was in love with her. She didn't want this with him; she didn't want what came with him. He watched her, his heart aching as he realized the depth of her fear and uncertainty. She was running from the very thing he had hoped they could build together.

"Eko, I—" he pleaded, suddenly unlike himself. As his chest tightened, he clenched his fists, trying to hold onto the last shreds of control. In all his adult life, this was the hardest thing he had ever had to do—admit that he loved someone. It was dangerous in his line of work, and if he did, it would also mean eventually telling her who he really was. That level of understanding and acceptance from her was terrifying to contemplate.

"Don't say it," she snapped, the alcohol taking control. "We knew what this was."

"Yeahhh... what it was bef—"

"Enough," she interrupted, the thought of Maddy's advice echoing in her mind. Maybe getting out of Allegiant was the best thing for them. Like she would ever have a future with him? "Let's call this what it was. This was a goodbye fuck."

"A goodbye fuck?" He tested the words, the bitter taste lingering on his tongue. Stepping towards her, he loomed close, his breath warm against her skin, his presence overwhelming, like a creature ready to devour her. The tension between them crackled with unresolved emotions and unspoken truths.

"Yes, because that's all you're capable of, right? You only came for me because you were so fucking worried about your ego being hurt or some chauvinistic bullshit like that! Like you could ever love someone! Nobody loves in this life!" Eko's voice roared, her hands pushing against his chest. "Nobody knows how to love!"

"WHAT THE FU-"

"And at the end of the day," Eko only got louder, the alcohol fueling her anger, "Nothing is easy with you in my life! You have completely turned it upside down unlike anyone I have ever met!" Her finger jabbed at him in rage as her temper flared. Stepping back, she watched his deer-like state of fear.

"First of all, don't stand there and tell me what you think you know about me!" he gritted his teeth, shaking his head, utterly confused at her behavior. "You think you have me all figured out? You don't know fucking shit, Eko!"

"You know what, fuck this!" Eko roared back at him, her voice cracking with the weight of it all because all she wanted to do was scream at the idiot she was desperately in love with. "I didn't sign up for this! I never came here for this! This should have NEVER happened between us!"

"Good!" he snapped, just as angry as she had been, though uncertain of the agreement he was making. "Go! This isn't where you want to be. It was just a fuckfest for you, and now you're bored, you're just going to toss me to the side and fuck off!"

Eko's eyes widened, hurt and anger flashing across her face. "Oh my GOD!" she screamed vehemently, pointing to her head to indicate how crazy he was. "Are you even listening to yourself? Me tossing you aside? That's rich! THAT IS SO FUCKING RICH COMING FROM YOU!"

Matthew's chest heaved as he took a long, deep breath, his fists clenched at his sides. "Fuck off, Eko. GO! Run off to Luke and fuck him for all I care now! YOU HAD YOUR FUN WITH ME, DIDN'T YOU? YOU GOT ENOUGH ENTERTAINMENT OUT OF TONIGHT!"

"YOU KNOW WHAT! FUCK YOU, MATTHEW!" She stormed past him, rage pulsating in every fibre of her body. "I'M NOT WASTING MY FUCKING TIME ON THIS ANYMORE!" She turned her back on him and headed towards Hassels. "GOD WHY ARE YOU SUCH A FUCKING CUNT!"

"JUST FUCK OFF!" he screamed back at her, his head thrown over his shoulder, his voice cracking with the intensity of his fury.

"FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE!" she yelled just as angrily, her voice echoing in the night. She was done with this life, with him, with it all. It was time to scrape her broken heart up from the floor and get the hell out of there.

Matthew watched her go, his chest heaving with unspent anger and bitter regret. The echo of their shouting reverberated in his mind, leaving a hollow ache in its wake. Then rage consumed him, fueled by the alcohol flooding his system. He knew they had crossed lines that could never be uncrossed. His heart pounded painfully in his chest, and his powers flared uncontrollably around him. In a surge of raw energy, he disappeared, reappearing in the field—the only place where he could safely unleash his anger.

As he stood there, he could feel Snow's powers surging within him, her hatred and fury seeping into his very being. The intensity of her emotions amplified his own, pushing him to the brink. The energy crackled around him, wild and untamed, as he screamed into the void, releasing the torrent of emotions that threatened to consume him whole.

---- ----

Are we just friends if it's your breath on my neck late at night.

Or if it's our laced fingers beneath your covers?

How tightly do we need to be pressed against one another before you admit that you aren't doing this for warmth?

How many times does your thumb need to brush over my lips before we realize we've gone too far?