Chapter Twenty-Nine

We Walk the Precipice

She walked through the familiar halls, holding the familiar trey, with the familiar sense of evil inside of her and the same poison and blood on her hands.

Selina did not miss the Skeffington’s mansion and she did not miss her role in her brother’s sadistic plans. With a sunken heart, she knocked on the door to Sir Amos’s chambers and allowed herself to enter.

She regretted it immediately.

Amos had obviously gotten worse over the short two days she had been away. Victor, apparently, had had no problem poisoning him by himself.

His pale face, his heavy and slow breathing, his weakened body, his sunken eyes… It all contributed to the same sickening portrait. It disturbed her.

Trembling, she served him his coffee and medicine. Sir Amos took it, hands shaking as much as hers.

“Thank you, Beatrice.”

She spared a few seconds to let it sink in. He had never called her by name before.

Somehow, it just made it worse.

“You’re welcome, Sir Amos,” she replied, as she slightly bowed, anxious to leave the room. “I hope you a fast recovery.” The words burned in her tongue.

She turned to leave, more than ready to leave the terrible sight of the poisoned man behind her.

“You are loyal and kind,” he told her, before she reached the door. His words paralyzed her to the ground. “Loyalty is a rare quality. It’s a sign of bravery and love. Don’t lose it.” He smiled, genuinely and it was an alien expression on his face, though it seemed to take years from him and make him look healthier, it also didn’t seem to fit him. Besides, it only increased her need to run.

Without a word, Selina left the room as fast as she could without running. She rested against the closed door, her hand covering her mouth, trying to control her urge to cry and her self-hatred.

***

  Selina always surrendered herself to her violin. She always poured her heart into every single note – according to Edna, it was the only way.

Today, Selina drowned all her sorrows, sadness and regrets into the instrument. It was healing, like the sound she produced was cleansing.

She didn’t seem to be the only person who felt that way. Back in the drawing room, Lenora once again sat in her favorite chair, next to her favorite window and savored every single moment of the beautiful song.

It was the only thing Selina could truly miss from that house – these moments in this room with Lenora. It wasn’t the same world that existed outside.

Lenora wasn’t the only one listening this time. Jack sat next to his mother, his eyes never left Selina and his smile never wavered. Once the song was over, he clapped with enthusiasm, praising every second of her performance. Selina blushed and thanked him with an appreciative bow, a wide smile on her face - she wasn’t used to the sound of applause or such high and cheerful praise. Her heart grew for him. He could make her so happy.

“Wonderful, Miss Beatrice, as usual,” Lenora complimented as she stood up from her seat.

“Thank you, Lady Lenora. You are very kind.”

“She’s not being kind, she’s being honest,” Jack interceded and Selina replied him with another bright smile that he returned.

“Yes, well…” Lenora began, looking away from the couple as if she was intruding. “I have to find Madam Price to discuss house affairs. I shall leave you for the time being.”

She made for the door but, before she stepped outside, she exchanged glances with them and, as if reading Jack’s wide grin, she said, in a warning tone, “Don’t do anything inappropriate.”

Jack laughed as a response, which didn’t seem to appease his mother in any way. As soon as she closed the door, Selina sighed – as much as she enjoyed Lenora’s company, it was always like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders when her mistress left, so heavy was Selina’s desire to please and impress the woman. With only Jack’s presence, she could be herself with no pressure – or as herself as she could possibly be, inside that house and living in that city.

She smiled at him again, rested the violin with extreme care in its appropriate place and walked towards him, craving more than ever to be lost in him. He looked at her with a mysterious, knowing smile.

“What are you hiding?”

Selina stopped in her tracks immediately. Her eyes widened with sudden surprise and fear. She didn’t say anything, she just looked at him and his smile remained.

She was somewhat relieved to see that he didn’t seem upset or angry in any fashion, in fact, he seemed entertained. At the sight of her confused expression, he decided to elaborate, “Your music, the way you play it… I can tell you have a secret.”

Selina faked a gentle smile, though she feared it would come off as a sign of her nerves – which it was. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Bea… I thought we had agreed not to keep anything from each other.” His smile was a kind one and that was enough to soothe her. He wasn’t accusing her, he was trying to support her.

She wasn’t quite sure if she was relieved or disappointed. In a way, Selina wanted to be caught. At least that would put an end to all the madness.

She took a deep breath and an idea entered her mind. It made sense and, though it wasn’t the total truth, it also wasn’t a lie – which would be a welcomed change.

“I’m worried. I can’t bear the sight of you father like that. I don’t think I can take it. After my mother’s sickness… I guess I don’t deal well with…”

She couldn’t finish the sentence and she didn’t need to. Jack stood up from his seat and walked to her. He embraced her with his strong arms and the feeling was of merciful bliss. She wished she never had to leave him.

“I understand, Bea,” he spoke against her hair, before gently kissing her forehead.

“I don’t think I can work here anymore. I’m so sorry! But it’s taking a hold of me,” she said against his chest. It was almost as cleansing as playing the violin, to finally show a piece of her true self to him, to tell him the truth, even if it was just a small portion of it. In that moment, in his arms, Selina really couldn’t think of Victor or his plans. She was being sincere with Jack and it felt as though the weight of a thousand worlds had been lifted from her soul.

“Then you should leave.”

“But your mother… I really don’t want to leave her. She was so kind to me, I really don’t want to disappoint her.”            

I don’t want to disappoint my brother.

“Beatrice…” He grabbed her arms and looked her in the eyes with that cheerful smile that fitted him like a glove and that seemed to make the world such a brighter place. “Don’t worry about my mother, don’t worry about me, don’t worry about anyone else. Worry about yourself. If you don’t feel happy in this house, you should leave. My mother will find another servant, we will still be together, maybe you can even play the violin for her and we will find you another job. Just do what it’s best for you. Leave.”

Selina smiled again and nodded. Jack made it all so simple and she just had to agree, happy that it all felt so right when he said it to her.

She would leave.

***

The market was crowded and busy as usual, so it was a wonder to her how he still managed to find her.

“Isn’t it odd, how fate keeps putting us in each other’s way? That has to mean something, I’m sure.”

She smiled will foul intent. Ethel was pretty sure he didn’t accidentally walk in her way, she was sure he had followed her.

“Well, it certainly keeps putting you in my way. Aren’t you buying anything, Jackson?” she asked to catch him in his own lie, she knew he wasn’t there for any other reason than to pry her for more information.

“Huh… Not at the moment, no. I can’t seem to find anything that interests me,” he replied with a cheerful smile. “Not for sale, at least.”

“You must have exquisite taste, then,” she rolled her eyes, not even trying to pretend she believed him. “And as such, you shouldn’t waste your time coming here.” That said, she handed her grocery bags to him, which he clumsily accepted to carry.

“So,” he started, obviously trying to make his tone innocent and conversational, “couldn’t help but notice the rare lack of children following you.” He clearly expected her to say something, but as Ethel continued inspecting the fruit station, he decided to force her to. “Where are they?”

“Why the interest?” she asked, without looking at him.

“Curiosity.” Lewis shrugged. “They’re always following you.”

“They’re at home,” she answered, not giving the matter the importance he seemingly wanted.

“You mean your home or their home?”

This time, Lewis certainly got the reaction he had been hoping for. Ethel froze in place for only a few seconds and finally turned to look at him. He was smiling, happy to have gotten a reaction out of her.

“They’re not yours, are they?”

She smiled back though and was content to see him display a small look of surprise.

“They might as well be,” she explained nonchalantly, returning her attention to the market stands. “They’re living with me, for a reason that still escapes me.”

“So they’re at your home? The von Mallesch building?”

Ethel froze in place again and, this time, didn’t gift him with her glance.

“Exactly.”

Lewis didn’t seem willing to give up on the subject, though.

“You know, for someone who claims supreme ignorance on that family, it’s a fair surprise to find out you’re living in that house, don’t you agree?”

Ethel smiled again, looking at him with amusement. She decided to play his game.

“Have you been following me, Lewis Jackson?”

He smiled in return. “I don’t need to follow people to find out what I want about them.”

“Oh, well, that’s disappointing.” She walked ahead and he followed, chuckling at her playful response.

“Were you aware that you are living on the von Mallesch house?”

“Of course. There’s a giant painting of their family in the living room and carved ravens with the family name everywhere. I would have to be a particular kind of dense not to know it.”

He chuckled again. “Yet, you never mentioned it.”

“Why would I? It is none of your concern and it holds no bearing on your case.”

Lewis walked faster to accompany her quick pace, coming to walk right at her side. “How did you end up there? Where do you come from?”

“Why do you care?” Ethel stopped walking and turned to him, a small entertained grin on her features. “Am I a suspect to you?”

“Of course not,” he answered, mimicking her amusement. “I’m just interested in you.”

She smiled again, faking innocence and walked again, Lewis quick to keep up with her.

“I come from Grimsbury.”

“That’s far away.”

“I hadn’t noticed.” He chuckled again at her remark and she continued, “I needed a place to stay and, obviously, the house was available.”

“How do you know Gabriel McGrath?” Ethel was quick to hide her surprise at his question. She knew he was studying her, underneath all the superficial pleasantries. Lewis proceeded, “It’s his property now. In fact, I do believe he resides there as well.”

She sighed, as if she was bored with the interrogation.

“His father was a friend of my late husband’s family. When I became a widow and expressed the desire to leave, Sir McGrath generously offered me his help, in the name of his father’s old friendship.”

“Why did you decide to leave?”

Her demeanor changed, her smile vanished and she stopped walking. Her eyes betrayed no feeling, though her voice poured sadness and pain. “Bad memories. I loved my husband. It pained me to live in the same house where he perished. It pained me to sleep in the empty bed we once shared, walk through the gardens where we once held hands, look at his empty chair in our table… I needed a new beginning. Sir McGrath was kind enough to provide me with one.”

Ethel walked away, leaving a stunned Lewis behind, though only for a few seconds. He reached her side again, and for a few moments, he seemed genuinely surprised by her first sincere and honest words. It didn’t last long, for Lewis was ready to continue their previous conversation again.

“Gabriel McGrath sounds like an incredibly generous man.”

“He’s honorable,” she replied. “That’s all. He honors his father’s wishes. Besides, he’s only helping me get started. As soon as I get my life back and find myself a home, I will move on.”

“Why do you think McGrath bought that house?”

She grinned. “Is he your suspect?”

Lewis chuckled once again. “Not at all. I just wonder why, out of all the properties he could buy, he chose that particular one.”

“He likes the house’s history. He wants to restore it to its old grandeur. He believes he can make it be worth a lot of money.”

“Do you know him well?”

Ethel laughed. “Dear Jackson, this is something you should already be aware of. No one really knows Gabriel McGrath.”

***

Jack was trying to rest, the open book that lay on his lap more of a prop than anything else. When she walked inside without knocking, he knew he was in trouble.

Hannah waltzed into his room, stunning and gorgeous as always and his heart raced, his body tensed immediately, but he was set on not letting her know how much she still affected him. His eyes flew from her to his book in a feeble attempt to look uninterested.

“I heard that your new distraction left today,” she practically sang her sentence, not even having the good taste to disguise her joy.

“She’s not my distraction,” he answered with a dry tone, only glancing at her before returning his attention to the written words in his book.

Hannah ignored his remark. “Your mother is upset.”

Jack sighed and closed the book. He stared at Hannah with a smile on his face. “She has reasons to be. Beatrice is delightful and extremely talented, not to mention a stunning vision of beauty.” Jack’s smile widened. “This house will certainly miss her grace and shine.”

Hannah returned his smile and slowly walked to him, seductively. She stopped behind his chair and lowered herself, so that her mouth was inches from his earlobe. Her hands traveled down his chest and Jack took a deep breath.

She whispered in his ear, “I’m a vision of beauty… and I’m still here.”

Jack took her hands in his and shoved them aside, quickly getting up from the chair and facing her. “What are you doing?”

“Reminding you of what you’re missing.” She smiled and slowly walked to him again. “It’s hard to give up old habits, isn’t it? And I miss you, Jack.”

There was no inkling of amusement left in Jack at that point. “Hannah, just because Beatrice isn’t working here anymore, doesn’t mean we’re not together. We are,” he spoke in a serious and determined tone, hoping to make the message sink in.

His words didn’t seem to waver her intentions, though. Her seductive steps towards him didn’t falter. “And the fact that one of us has someone else never stopped us before, did it?”

She was close to him again, her hands reaching to him and Jack had to step back to keep the distance. “Stop it,” he said, avoiding her eyes.

“I know you want me…” she whispered. “I can see it when you look at me.” She rested her hands on his cheeks and Jack had to, once again, avoid her touch.

“Stop it, Hannah! Damn you,” his voice was raised and he turned away from her, walking to another side of the room. “Why do you have to make this so difficult?”

“It doesn’t have to be this way. We could still be together and no one would know. Not Nicholas and not Beatrice. It would be our new secret. We’re good at those.”

She let her hand gently caress his back and he shoved her away once more.

“Leave me alone, Hannah,” he almost begged. “Forget me, like I’m trying to forget you. Why can’t you let me do the right thing?”

“The right thing to do is to obey your heart. And your heart is telling you to be with me, just like mine is telling me to be with you.”

“You had your chance!” Jack raised his voice again in exasperation. “You made your choice. Now, I’m making mine. Respect it, like I respected yours for so long, no matter how much it always cost me.” He sighed, calming himself as Hannah looked at him with fear and surprise in her eyes. “Be true to your fiancé. I’m with Bea and, for once, I will stand by her.”

There was nothing more difficult to him than to reject the woman he still loved. It was like he was scratching and ripping apart his own chest. It was so hard to resist her, but he knew it was the right thing to do – for everybody.

Before he would let himself fall victim to her spell, he turned to leave the room. Hannah followed and grabbed his shirt, her eyes wide with despair.

“You’re mine, Jack!”

“Not anymore,” he replied, avoiding her eyes and trying to free himself of her poisonous grasp.

“I won’t lose you!”

“Already did.”

He finally freed himself and opened the door, as desperate to leave as she was desperate to hold on to him.

“Don’t walk away from me, Jack!” she almost yelled, apparently forgetting to lower her voice in front of the open door. She didn’t seem to care and, at that point, neither did he. “You can’t reject me! You can’t forget me!” she sounded like she was on the verge of tears, but Jack kept walking away from her, no matter how loud every inch of his body screamed at him to comfort her and to hold her close. “You can’t do this to me!”

“You did it to yourself.”

***

“I heard your father has fallen to illness.”

Jack took his eyes away from his drink to stare at Lewis Jackson, who had just sat next to him at the balcony of their usual bar. The Black Cat seemed to be particularly crowded tonight and Lewis seemed to be particularly cheerful. At the sight of his wide smirk, Jack couldn’t help but smile back, even though he wasn’t feeling in the mood for cheer and friendly banter.

He took a big gulp of his drink. “As usual, you are correct.”

“Is it serious?” Lewis asked, his smile faltering slightly, probably in a sign of polite concern.

“The doctors are confident it will pass in time,” Jack answered, before he drank his beer in one go and asked Lionel for another round.

“What is it?”

“To tell you the truth, they’re not quite sure.” Jack smiled without humor.

Lewis’s attention went to the ceiling, talking loud enough for Jack to hear but, otherwise, seemingly talking to himself, “So Amos Skeffington falls suddenly ill, victim of an evil that no one quite understands?”

“Yes.”

The journalist’s eyes fell on the youngest Skeffington again. “Don’t you find it slightly suspicious?”

Jack shrugged, feeling rather uncomfortable with the question. “Well, I hadn’t, but now that you say it like that, I can see why you’d be tempted to think so. What are you implying, though?”

“Not sure yet…” Lewis mumbled, his gaze far away. He suddenly returned his focus to Jack and smiled again. “I’ll keep this in mind, though.”

Jack accepted the beer Lionel brought him and drank from it before letting out a deep sigh. “It’ll pass. My father is old, tired, works too much and travels a lot. I’m sure there’s no reason to think about it further.”

“So I take it that your brother is running your empire for the time being?”

Jack chuckled with bitterness. “No.”

“Sir Julius?”

“You’d think so.”

Jack drew some amusement at the confused expression in Lewis’s face. After a few seconds of thought, it was clear that the red haired had come to the right conclusion on his own and the look of surprise on his face almost made Jack laugh.

“Gabriel McGrath?” he asked, not quite believing his own words and sinking deeper into surprise as Jack nodded. “Your father appointed him?”

Jack brought the drink to his lips. “I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who finds this ludicrous.”

“This is mighty interesting…” Lewis was, once again, lost in thought, bearing the most serious expression that Jack had ever seen on him.

Jack chuckled again. “My father’s fever might’ve been worse than we thought at the time.”

Lewis grinned at him. “Is that why you’re drinking the way you are? Drowning your worries and sorrows?”

“Definitely,” Jack answered with a light laugh. “But not for that reason.”

“Well, in my experience, there are only two kinds of sorrow that would make a man drink like that – money or women. Since you have no such thing as money problems, I’m guessing it’s related to women.” Jack smiled with sadness and Lewis insisted, “What happened? Did that gorgeous young lady leave you?”

“No. Beatrice is… special.” Jack’s expression was loving and genuinely happy, in a quiet manner, for the first time that night.

“Then I don’t understand. No man in the world should be in woe with a woman like that on his side.”

Jack’s smile vanished. “I don’t deserve her.”

“Maybe you don’t,” Lewis playfully replied, though he spoke with kindness. “You know, I’m a great listener and, despite my profession, very good at keeping secrets.”

Jack’s eyes found the journalist and he sighed. “I do need a friend.” His sadness deepened and he felt even more repulse at the realization that it was his own fault he couldn’t confide in his closest friend – his brother.

Lewis smiled wide and opened his arms in a friendly gesture. “At your disposal.”

Jack felt immense gratitude towards the red haired man and decided to trust him all his recent worries and tribulations with regards to Beatrice LaFontaine and Hannah Vincent. He didn’t really know what drove him to confide such dangerous and secret issues with a man he barely knew, but there was something about him that made him feel at ease and he couldn’t help but trust him. The truth was – Jack really needed a friend and Lewis was the only one in the grim city who made him feel a semblance of comfort and friendship.

Apart from his brother, of course. Or Beatrice. Or Hannah. But he couldn’t talk about this with any of them.

He spoke of his betrayal, his guilt, his conflicted attraction towards Hannah, his care for Beatrice and his repulse for himself. He confessed to everything as if wishing it would somehow lift all the weight of his sins, as if wishing that admitting to be wrong would make him less evil.

Lewis listened with attention to his every word and, to Jack’s relief, not as a journalist or curious gossiper. He listened as a good lad would.

When Jack finally ended his tale, he felt lighter and relieved. Lewis smiled with understanding and kindness.

“Well, that is a tough predicament.” Then he chuckled. “Only Jack Skeffington would have this kind of problem – having two beautiful ladies at his feet.”

“One of them does not belong to me.”

“True, that’s very true. Do you want an advice?”

Jack smiled, thankful. “Please.”

Lewis lost his smile and his carefree attitude, his expression suddenly serious and darker. “Be careful with Beatrice LaFontaine.”

Jack was surprised at these words, they were the last thing he expected to hear. He was confused and, frankly, wondering if Lewis had completely understood his story.

“Why would you say that? You should be warning her about me.”

Lewis shrugged. “Maybe, but the truth is – you don’t know that much about her, do you?” Jack remained silent and Lewis proceeded, “Where does she come from? Why is she here? What does she want?”

Jack didn’t answer, realizing he couldn’t. He just stared at the red haired, focusing on his words.

Lewis sighed and retained his serious tone, getting even closer to his most recent friend, his voice full of warning. “Be careful with her. But above all – be even more careful with Hannah Vincent.”

***

In the von Mallesch house, an enchanting song filled the rooms - the sad and melancholic cries of a violin. Selina played with her soul, on the violin that Lady Lenora had given her, to an audience that consisted of her dear family.

Ethel rested against the door frame, hidden, drinking her wine and smiling at the sight of her younger sister. Joshua and Alice listened at the top of the stairs, hypnotized by the alluring sound. Nothing moved but Selina. No one dared, or wished, to break the beatiful moment. No other sound was made.

Victor felt broken and, at the same time, complete. It was like the violin awakened something buried deep within, something that was always there, always fighting, always conflicting.

Victor listened in silence to the wonderful melody, sitting in their old couch, his head resting in his hands. He smiled but it didn’t seem genuine. He laughed, but it sounded maniacal and devoid of any honest joy.

He spoke to no one, “So much left to do.” 

Author's Notes - I'm really sorry for the delay, guys. Hope you've enjoyed this one :) As usual, it is mandatory that you know that I love you all <3