Chapter Twenty-Three

Corruption of the Soul

The Vincent mansion stood glowing and powerful for decades. It was a part of St. Agnes’s history, its name belonging to time with almost as much strength and importance as the name Skeffington - and as von Mallesch had once held.

On the outside, its green gardens and brilliant structure radiated beauty. It was considered by many the most gorgeous building in the whole city – maybe even the only one. The Vincent family had always been known for their hypnotic allure, they spread beauty and grace through St. Agnes. It was the only property that didn’t remember the cold and grey – it was completely out of place in that city, like it belonged in a much more attractive, much warmer world.

On the inside though, it couldn’t be more different. Hannah sighed as she looked around her once magnificent and rich living room. It was bare now, bare and empty, poor and dark, cold and raw. Her family had once been rich and powerful, now, they only had their name and beauty. It was a secret that burdened her to bear, no one knew, not even their oldest allies – the Skeffingtons.

Her mother entered the room, her face alight with pleasure at the sight of her only daughter. She almost ran to Hannah, the savior of the family, wearing an incredible gown that should’ve been sold long ago – but it was important to keep, not only for appearances, but also for pride.

She embraced Hannah in a strong, warm hug and Hannah felt at home.

“My dear daughter, it’s so nice of you to visit. I was starting to miss you dearly. How have you been?”

Hannah smiled. “I missed you too, mother.”

The two women sat in the last remaining couch in the grand living room.

“Tell me, how are things at the Skeffingtons’s?”

“Everything is fine.”

“How is Nicholas?”

Hannah sighed, her gaze turning from her mother to her hands. “He’s concerned about some recent events… He’s been more distant than usual. It appears like Sir Amos has been giving him less work.”

“Well, if your fiancé is upset, it is your job, as his future wife, to ease his mind. Use his new, freer schedule to spend more time with him, to remind him of your love and dedication, to show him how happy you’ll make him. Maybe you can spend more time together, planning your wedding.”

“Yes, mother.”

She could tell her mother wanted to bring in another topic, and she could tell which it was, by the scowl that was appearing on her face.

“How are you dealing with your other… issue?” she asked, without looking at her daughter and looking mighty uncomfortable. “Are you still seeing Jack Skeffington?”

Hannah didn’t answer and stared at the ground. Her mother took her silence as a good enough answer and got up from her seat, pacing in front of Hannah as if she had insulted her.

“I… I can’t help it, mother. I love him,” she desperately tried to explain, as her mother flinched as if her words stung.

She finally glared at her daughter. “Hannah Vincent! This is not the behavior of a proper lady. We talked about this. You can ruin everything! This silly crush, this childish romance you have imagined, this can be our downfall. It can never happen! Keep your mind and heart on your real future. Stay away from Jack Skeffington!”

“But, mother-“

The woman wasn’t listening. She was pacing again, with a hint of panic and worry.

“If Nicholas finds out… If Lenora dreams of this… If Amos suspects anything… We will be forever shamed and miserable.”

Hannah sighed. “Mother…”

“The honor and future of the Vincent family lies on your shoulders.”

“But I-“

“Ever since your father lost all our fortune, your marriage to Nicholas is our only hope, our only salvation.”

“I know, but…” Hannah played with her fingers, finally gathering the courage to look at her mother. “Mother, Jack is a Skeffington, too. Maybe I-“

“Oh, please child!” Her mother waved her hand and looked at her as if she was talking nonsense. “You know very well that you can’t stay with Jack. Nicholas is the heir, he is the one who will inherit and own all of the Skeffington’s empire. Jack couldn’t be farther from that. You said so yourself – he is not interested in his own fortune. If you stay with Jack, you will be two poor fools, travelling the world with no ambition, wearing nothing but rags, sleeping in local shacks. That is his definition of happiness. Tell me, Hannah, is that the lifestyle you want?”

“No!”

“And me and your poor father… reduced to beg charity from our old friends… All of our history, our name, dragged in the streets of this cursed city. We will be the reason for laughter. Is that the humiliation you wish for your family?”

“Of course not!”

“I don’t understand you, my daughter. The idea of marriage was yours alone. You were the one who devised your union with Nicholas, who chose him. Why all the doubts now?”

Hannah looked at her lap again. “I hadn’t realized how much I’d grow to care for Jack.”

“Nicholas is a gentleman,” her mother said, a hopeful smile on her lips. She grabbed her daughter’s hands. “A man with an incredible future. He can provide you a life of comfort and luxury. He is handsome, charismatic, respectable, honorable, bright and generous. You are the love of his life, he cares for you so deeply. Don’t you care for him?”

“Yes, I do. I love him.”

“And Jack?”

Hannah sighed and avoided her mother’s eyes. “I love him too.”

Her mother quickly let go of her hands, as if they burned. “Then, you must choose. If you choose Nicholas, you will have the life you always wanted, the life you so cherish. He will save you and your family. If you choose Jack, no matter how much of a Skeffington he is, no matter how much Lenora intercedes for him, Amos and Nicholas will never forgive him. Jack will be taken from the will, he will be an outcast to his own family. You will be left with nothing but Jack himself. Do you love him enough to make that sacrifice?”

Hannah remained silent for a moment, carefully considering her mother’s words. When she looked at her again, her blue eyes were focused, her stance was one of determination.

“No.”

***

Selina paced in front of the grand doors, nervously playing with her hands, trembling, confused, terrified. She didn’t know what to do. She felt on the verge of madness.

The environment inside the mansion couldn’t be heavier.

Sir Amos had awakened to terrible illness. He couldn’t get out of bed. He was running a dangerous, inexplicable fever, he could barely talk and he had serious trouble breathing. His chest burned, his head hurt. The best doctors had been called, but not one of them could quite understand what was happening and all of them put a tentative gamble on a serious virus, probably acquired during one of his recent travels.

Selina knew too well what was really happening.

She had been summoned to Sir Amos’s bedroom, to bring him a strong tea that was to be served with his medicine.

The tea was poisoned.

She couldn’t get inside. She didn’t believe she could bear the sight of the man that she was slowly and painfully killing. She couldn’t quite bear the thought of it - she knew she was to blame.

Selina had always known this was going to happen. Every day, when she poured Ethel’s poison in one of Amos’s drinks, she knew she was taking him one step closer to his own end. Yet, somehow, she wasn’t ready. She wasn’t ready to face her victim. She wasn’t ready for this to happen. She knew it, but she had struggled to forget it, cowardly pushing it to the back of her mind, until it inevitably became impossible to ignore.

She wasn’t ready. She couldn’t face it. She couldn’t bear the guilt.

She grabbed the trey and hastily made to leave. She would go to the kitchens and prepare him a new tea, one without the venom. Maybe it wasn’t too late.

“Beatrice?”

She stopped in place at the sound of her brother’s call. She turned to face him and he looked at her with suspicion.

“Where are you going?”

She couldn’t look him in the eyes, too embarrassed of her cowardice and weakness, too ashamed of her decision to betray him.

At the lack of a response, Victor took a deep breath and grabbed her arm. He led her to an empty room.

“What is going on, Selina?” his voice exuded concern and she felt encouraged to look at him again.

“I can’t do it, Victor. I’m so sorry. I can’t look at him.”

Victor rested his hands on her shoulders. “Listen to me, sister.” Selina looked him in the eyes and saw that he wasn’t angry. He smiled. “I understand. I understand how you feel. But this is not the time to give up. This is a good thing! This is what we’ve been working and fighting for.” She nodded, feeling instantly calmer, yet not better.

“You have been so brave, you have worked so much. I am so proud of you. I know you are strong enough for this, Selina. I know you have it in you. Remember, that man is not a poor, sick, innocent man. He’s a murderer. He destroyed our family. He’s the main reason why we didn’t grow up together, why our parents are gone, why they weren’t there to raise us. He deserves this.”

Selina took a deep breath, feeling braver, though still far from feeling at peace with it. Victor let his hands fall from her shoulders.

“Let’s go. We will walk inside together.”

Feeling comfort in knowing that Victor would be with her, Selina grabbed the trey and they walked towards the door.

“Did you really mean that?” she asked and Victor stopped, his hand already holding the door’s handle. He looked at her with confusion. “What you said… Do you really think I’m strong enough?”

“You are stronger than you think.”

“Are you really… proud of me?”

“Always.”

She nodded with a smile and, together, Victor and Selina got out of the empty room. Together, they entered their victim’s chambers. Together, they stared at the frail shadow of a once magnificent man.

***

Selina held on to the kitchen’s counter as if her life depended on it. She couldn’t shake the image of Amos’s weakness from her mind. He wasn’t close to death, that much she was sure, but it was agonizing to know that, contrary to everyone’s belief, he would not get better.

He thanked her for the tea. He always did. He was, unknowingly, grateful for his demise.

She would never be able to forgive herself.

The look of relief on her mistress’s face, Nicholas and Jack’s happiness when the doctor told them it was nothing to worry about, that he would definitely get better… It would forever haunt her. The expression of twisted pleasure on Victor’s face… It would forever disturb her.

“Bea…”

Selina found strength she didn’t even know she possessed and gripped the counter with even more despair. The loving name, the voice of Jack… It was like a stab in her heart.

She turned to face him, her expression hard and unreadable. She was determined to stay strong.

“Yes, master Jack?”

He winced at how she addressed him, with that impersonal, cold reference that he so despised. She felt terrible in her own skin.

Jack walked to her, looking upset but as determined as she was.

“I don’t want to lose you.”

“You already did,” the coldness in her voice surprised her as much as it did him.

“Don’t… say that.” He walked closer to her. Too close. But she remained in her spot, unwilling to let him know that he affected her. “I need you, Beatrice. The thing with Hannah… It’s a mistake. It’s a terrible, awful mistake. I know that. And yes, I have had others. But you… you’re different.”

“Jack, I really don’t-“

“Just listen to me, please.” He held her arms, to prevent her from leaving. She avoided his gaze. “Everything feels right with you. You are the only right thing in my life. You make me feel like myself, you… You are not just a distraction.”

“Just let me go-“

“I’m being honest!” he almost yelled, sounding desperate and looking dead serious, like he was angry at her. “Can’t you see? For the first time, in a very long time, I’m being honest. I can be so with you. I promise you, Beatrice, you are not just another one. You are so much more than that!”

“What about Hannah?” she asked, looking at him with defiance.

“Forget about her!” he said, displaying a frown, like she had insulted him and given him one more reason to be mad at her. “I don’t want to think about her, not in that way. I want to devote all my thoughts to you. Hannah’s a mistake. You are the right one. You’re the only thing keeping me sane.”

“I don’t want to be just someone to help you forget her.”

He flinched at her comment, eyeing her like she didn’t understand what he was saying.

“I don’t want to be with you to forget her, Bea. I want to be with you because you make me forget her. When we’re together, you’re all I can see, all I can feel, all I can think about. You’re all I want.”

She looked at him with doubt. All of her being was screaming at her to believe him, to embrace him and accept him. In his eyes, she could see truth.

“Please, just give me a chance. Let me try to be the man you always believed me to be.”

Her heart melted. She was incapable to deny him.

“You want to be with me?”

Jack smiled wide. “All the time.”

“But your mother, your family-“

“Forget about them,” he looked happy, excited even. “I don’t care what they think.”

Selina couldn’t help but smile as well. “But I need this job.”

“We can be together in secret.” He grinned and shrugged. “It’s not like I’m not used to it.”

She frowned. “That’s not funny.”

Jack laughed. “It is a little.” And before she could reply, he held her tight against him. Selina felt at home in his arms. Like him, when he was close to her, she forgot about everything. She forgot about her siblings, their revenge, the horrible person she was. She just wanted to feel him.

“I’m tired of secrecy,” he admitted, talking against her hair. “But for you, it’s worth it.”

They pulled apart and Selina gently kissed his lips. Jack’s hands found her neck and he looked at her with adoration. She felt safe.

“Let’s be honest with each other. No more secrets. From now on, I promise you, I’ll always tell you the truth. No more lies.”

She avoided his eyes for a moment, before smiling at him, not letting him see the internal fight she was battling. The truth was something she couldn’t share with him, they could never be completely transparent, no matter how much she wanted to.

If she ever were to be honest with him, he would hate her. She realized just how much of a hypocrite she had become, getting angry at him for keeping a secret that, when compared to hers, was so inoffensive. If she was to be completely honest, he would never look at her again and her siblings would be punished. If she was to tell him everything, it would all end with six devastating words.

I am slowly killing your father.