"She's going to have to stay here for two days and one night." The vet's eyes were steady, his voice level.

I gripped Becca's lead tighter. "Can I stay with her?"

"It's normally best if you don't. The process is quite delicate, and it's preferable if we don't have the added distraction of the owner here. Not to mention it can be stressful for you seeing her during the operation."

I swallowed. I hated the thought of Becca being all alone, but the vet assured me they would send her to sleep during the operation, and it wouldn't wear off until the next morning. Even then, she would be in isolation for the rest of the day, until she was well enough to go home with me. It was unfortunate, she had caught an infection during her time as a stray that meant she had to have her appendix removed. Uh. I shuddered at the thought of them cutting through poor Becca's flesh and tinkering with her body parts. But I hated the idea of her dying from her infection even more.

I headed over to the house of wind, blinking tears from my eyes. It's only for a couple of days, I told myself. She's not going to die.

"Becca's at the vet's for tonight, I'm not allowed to see her," I grouched to Cassian as we sparred. (I had moved on from practice posts to actual sparring)

"Oh," he said, spinning his blade round, gliding easily through my shoddy defensive work. "Did you want to do something to take your mind off it?"

"To be honest, yeah, that sounds good," I shifted my feet and raised my blade again, "Do you have anywhere else cool to show me?"

"There's a place, but it's quite a long flight..." he broke off, dark eyes searching mine.

"It's ok, I'm all cool with flying now I have the power to make you go 'Nesta! Nesta! Are you crazy!? What are you doing?!'"

He snorted ruefully. "Well I can guarantee this place is so cool you won't be able to think of anything else."

We stopped off at his to gather some things, blankets and such because we would be sleeping in the open. I could of got some more clothes, but I couldn't bring myself to step into my lonely apartment and not find my little doggy friend waiting for me. So we just set off, Cassian flying effortlessly and me slumped like a sack of potatoes.

We flew far into the Illyrian mountains, until Velaris was a speck in the distance, and wilderness stretched in every direction. We rounded a massive hulk of a mountain, and I gasped at what I saw. A single, massive oak tree clung near the top of a vertical cliff face. The view stretched away across hills in shades of charcoal and dun, with lakes shining like silver where the light caught them. Cassian flapped heavily, slowing until he landed on the trunk of the tree, stretching out nearly horizontal from where the roots were twisted into a crack in the rock. The tree was every bit as large as any in a woodland near Velaris, and the roots were like writhing snakes where they clung to the cliff. "It's secure. I've weathered a few gales up here." I turned to see Cassian hooking a length of cloth along one of the tree branches, spreading it out to reveal that it was a hammock.

"You only brought one hammock?" I said, glaring at him.

"I only have one hammock," he retorted, raising his eyebrows at me. "Problems?"

"Nah," I tried to keep it cool, failing utterly. He grinned, returning to his unpacking.

We ate a simple supper of dried fruit, sandwiches and a cake that Cassian had wrapped up in cloth to keep it fresh. It was a bit squashed from its journey but it tasted amazing. We sat in the hammock and watched the sun go down, watched colour streak across the sky. The hammock was awkwardly shaped so we both slid towards the middle, eventually I gave up and clambered into his lap. I was warm, and comfortable, and the view truly was stunning. I was sure Feyre could've done it justice with her paints, but I would just have to remember it. Cassian wrapped his arms around me, and for once I was relaxed enough to enjoy it. His chin managed to find its way onto my shoulder, and I smirked. "What?" he said, craning his neck to see my face.

"Just laughing at how cliche romantic this is - the sunset, the isolation,"

"The hundred foot drop," he added and I grinned more. "Well," his smirk widened, "Maybe it could get more cliche," and then he kissed me. 

The first touch of his velvet lips had me melting, the next had me burning with desire. I wrapped my arms around his neck, running fingers through his satin hair. His mouth was honey, his hair was silk, and the first stars were just appearing in the dusky sky above.

I woke sprawled across Cassian's bare chest, thankfully still fully clothed myself. I'd been so drunk on his kisses last night, anything could've happened and I wouldn't have batted an eyelid. Although, even my semi-sane morning brain was struggling to tear my eyes from the whorls of spiky Illyrian tattoos that crawled across his tawny skin. Not to mention the hulking muscles that resided just beneath. Dammit Nesta. I was just in the process of stopping my creepy staring when Cassian woke, opening hazel eyes and pushing mussed strands of ebony hair from his face.

He laughed slightly when he saw me, pushing himself onto his elbows. The ruby light of the sunrise played across his features and bathed him in fire. He was disgracefully handsome. I leaned back down to kiss him again, just as the sun peeked its way above the horizon. The first light of the day caught across his dark lashes, and in the floating strands of my hair, and I felt something spring into place between us. A bond, a bridge between our souls, a rope of cinnamon, black and gold. But it was not... working yet, somehow I knew. Not active, not complete. The mate bond? I needed to ask someone. Feyre. Maybe it was time to finally make peace with my sister.

Cassian flew me back, kissing occasionally but mostly talking and enjoying the feeling of his arms around me. He flew us straight to the vet's and no sooner had his feet touched the ground than I was springing away, darting through the doors in desperation to see my pup. The vet waved me through, smiling, and I dashed into the back room where several cages held a mixture of dogs. I skidded to a halt beside the last, unlatching the door, to see a waggy, larger than life, completely ecstatic little dog. My little dog.

She came flying out of the cage, her entire rear end wagging with joy, and I fell to my knees to greet her. She was wearing a stiffened cardboard cone but she still looked beautiful. We may have stayed there, sitting on the floor of the vets, for at least five minutes, until she finally broke away to greet Cassian, who had somehow appeared behind us. He'd probably actually just walked in normally, but I'd been so wrapped up in petting Becca I hadn't noticed.

Cassian kissed me softly on the side of the mouth as we parted ways outside the vets. We made no promises to meet again, but I didn't think either of us could stay away for long. He took off, flapping away to his own apartment, and Becca and I walked back to ours. We moved slowly and carefully, as the vet had said she should only be walked on the lead for a week until her stitches healed up.

Feyre, I thought moodily as I buttered toast for a mid-morning snack. I knew where she'd be, it was a Sunday and she tried to keep the weekends free from her High Lady duties. She'd be in her studio, perhaps with a class of youngsters learning how to draw, perhaps alone, working on one of her many paintings. I groaned. I had to go. My mind was made up. Even if she didn't want to see me, it was time I went to see her.

The bell tolled softly as I walked in. I tried to keep my last meeting with Feyre out of my mind. I'd said things then that now made me wince. I couldn't blame Feyre if she didn't want to see me.

She had a class, but she looked over as I walked in. Her face closed over when she saw me. "Nesta. How nice of you to drop in. I'm afraid I'm a little busy at the moment, if you wanted to talk you'd be better off coming in half an hour."

I nodded. I probably deserved that. "Can I just wait here, at the back? I won't disturb anyone."

Feyre didn't look happy, but she nodded. I walked over to one of the benches at the back, dumping my bag onto the floor. Becca was curled up at home, clearly still feeling the effects of the anaesthetics.

I pulled my notebook out of my bag, flipping through until I found a blank page. I smiled at the first poem there. I'd written it only a couple of days before, after trying to clean whilst Becca was in a playful mood.

The dog and the broom

My human battles the evil thing

Back and forth across the front yard

Locked in a deadly battle, of

Steps that I don't know

The evil thing snakes in and out

Leaves and dirt cower before it

Scurrying away from the teeth of its bristly maw

I dart in, shouting my anger,

In a war - horn voice of snapping teeth

The thing darts out, smacks a blow,

I spring away jaw singing

More leaps, more snaps, racing back and forth and

round and round

Until the yard is clean and

The monster locked away.

There were a couple of others, all written in the last week, but none like the one I was about to write. This one was my soul, wrapped in a guise of mountains.

Wings and Ash.

The void churns

Dust and light and memories

Fires die

But legacies remain

Floating free across the wind

As snow

Charcoal mountains

Lonely days

Heather and rock

Spread across the world like paint

Sepia

Wild place, untouched.

Bird flight

Dark wings spiral

Feathers catch the wind 

Heading places none have been before

Flapping through clean air

And churning ash.

I looked at it, unsure. I'd pressed so hard my pencil nearly tore the paper. I felt vulnerable. The poem was clunky, but it contained my soul.

I felt Feyre slide into the chair beside me, and looked up, startled. Everyone was packing away, it had been half an hour and it felt like five minutes.

"What have you been doing, Nesta?" she sounded genuinely curious. I wordlessly slid the poem over.

I wriggled anxiously as she read it, terrified. Suddenly it seemed childish and ridiculous. What had I been doing, rambling on and pretending I was all edgy and shit. It was the cringiest poetry I'd ever seen. I curled into a tiny ball of complete and utter cringe.

"Nesta... I didn't know you were a poet!" I looked at my sister, my soul trying to curl up tighter into its shell. "Actually, Nesta, this is amazing! I never knew you wrote."

"It's not that amazing.." I said, a flush stealing onto my cheeks. "It's not like you, making something beautiful out of a few tubes of colour. It's only words..." Feyre shook her head.

"It's not only words, Nesta. It's art, just of a different kind." I felt a smile spread across my face. I'd always shut my youngest sister out of my life, I'd never actually got to know her. It was definitely time for that to change.

"I was thinking, Feyre, maybe considering we now have an eternity together, I should perhaps get my head out my ass and come say sorry. I can understand if you never want to see me again, but I'm tired of hating you and I'm pretty sure you'll be tired of me being a bitch."

Feyre grinned, and I truly understood how she'd seduced all those high lords so effectively. My little sister really was a stunner. When she smiled it looked like she'd been lit up from inside.

"I'm sorry too, Ness. I should've made sure that you guys had the best support, but I was too caught up in my own problems and I didn't pay enough attention to how your lives had just been turned upside down."

"Let's stop with the saying that we're sorry and do something positive instead."

Feyre grinned again at that, and stood up. "It's my lunch break, there's a nice cafe along the street we could go to, have you eaten?"

"I had elevenses, but I reckon I could squeeze in a little bit of lunch..." I said, smirking.

Feyre laughed. "You sound like Cassian,"

"Ohh nooo," I wailed, covering my face, "he's rubbed off on me..."

Feyre was practically beaming as we left, the little bell above the door ringing a merry goodbye. We headed down the street to the small cafe she'd mentioned.

First we talked about general life, her telling me about how things were going with being high lady, and running the night court, and me telling her about how I'd started training and about how Becca was getting on. Then I brought the chat carefully around to mate bonds. 

"You'll know when the mate bond clicks into place. It's like a bridge between your souls...A rope, if you like."

I considered this. "And it lets you speak to your mate in your mind through it?"

"Well it does for me and Rhys... I'm not sure if that's because of our mind-attack powers though."

I snorted. "Mind-attack powers. What if there is a bond, but it's not working somehow?"

Feyre laughed. "Oh, that's easy. It just means you haven't both accepted the bond yet."

"How does the bond accepting work?"

"The female has to offer the male food. If he accepts it, they're mated fully. Now who's your mate??"

I sighed. "I'll admit that wasn't the most subtle..." she raised her eyebrows and I groaned. "All right, I'll tell you... it's, it's... fuck this... fucking Cassian."

My sister laughed so hard she fell off her chair. "Your face, Nesta... you look like a pouty kitten... Does he know? Have you told him?"

"No, of course I haven't told him. I haven't even fully admitted that I like him! I've no clue whether he knows, he never told me nothing,"

"When did it happen? Have you even kissed yet??"

I gritted my teeth. "Maybe a couple of times," I glared at her, my face slowly reddening. "You are insufferable. I'm regretting this already."

"Oh man," Feyre said, her smile nothing but evil, "That is the best gossip I've heard in ages... Who can I tell?"

I looked at her, incredulous. "You would tell people??!" Then something dawned on me. "Wait. You and Rhysand are connected, right? That means that Rhys knows this, right? Oh, shit." I slumped down, seething. I might have made peace with my sister, but I still wasn't such a big fan of her mate. The thought that he could know that before I wanted to tell him? Well, it wasn't something I wanted. Also, there was no knowing who Rhysand would tell, and I hadn't quite worked out where Cassian and I stood. I was pretty sure I wanted to become his mate, but I wanted to do it in my own time. I certainly didn't want Rhysand to tell him.

"I can't keep him out of my mind... I'm so sorry, Nesta. But he won't tell anyone you wouldn't want to know. I know you don't like him, but he's a good male. He'll understand if you don't want anyone to know yet. I'll tell him."

I relaxed into my chair, forcing a smile onto my face. "I may not have liked Rhys, but he makes you happy, Feyre, and happy is what you deserve."

She smiled her properly happy smile then, looking every inch the fairy queen that she was.

"Thanks, little sis." I said, smirking. "Wait, isn't it supposed to be the older one who gives their sisters advice on boys? You were mated and Elaine was engaged before I even had a boyfriend that I kept for more than a month,"

Feyre laughed at that, "Well, Elaine is currently single, and Mor's five hundred years older than you and has never stayed with a man for more than three weeks."

I laughed too. "I wonder.. What would it take to get her to tell her secrets?"

"Probably just a little bit of tea about who Cassian's mate is..." We both snickered at that. "If Cassian still doesn't know," Feyre went on, "He's going to be the last person to find out in the whole of the night court, the way this is going."

"Yeah," I said, "Although maybe that would be a bit too cruel... Maybe I should just accept it."

"Tonight?" asked my sister, eyes gleaming with laughter.

"No," I said, "In the morning. Mornings are special."