Slowly and steadily, the combined Ziannan and Navirian armies moved up the coast, reclaiming towns and fishing villages along the way. The knights were put on a continuously rotating schedule of leave. Acen, Joen and the twins had family in West Draulin, making it easy to visit. Mandell's family lived a day's ride from the city, and Jalor and Evrik's families were even further. Tannix spent his days floating between meetings, to private meals with Tairia and their mother, to joining the knights while they sparred or ran through exercises. Everyone was just waiting for orders from Tandrin.

The day orders finally arrived; I was with the knights. Roland had barged into the city in a rush, and Tannix and Lady West Draulin had been drawn into an immediate meeting. Mandell had been on duty and Acen was quickly sent for, leaving the rest of us to sit in the knights' private courtyard and wonder.

I sat, at least. Kor and Ender distracted themselves by sorting through their arrows, all the while talking under their breath about the navy and ship warfare. I would have tried to listen, but in their agitation, they quickly devolved to the type of Crelan jargon that was hard to follow. On the other side of the courtyard, Evrik was repeatedly slamming his biggest axe into a wooden figure. Jalor had disappeared to his room, saying something about writing letters.

When Joen joined me, he was fiddling with a loop of leather around his wrist. Eager for anything to distract me from what was happening, I watched him slip two fingers under the leather and tug on it.

"What's that?"

Joen looked at me, then followed my gaze to his wrist. He smiled. "Oh, my daughter Lylah made it for me." On closer inspection, I could see that it was actually three strips of leather, braided together. "She promised it would bring me good luck."

He was certainly not the only father heading to war, but he was the only one of our knights with children. No, I reminded myself, he wasn't even a knight. He was a blacksmith. "Are you scared?"

Joen raised an eyebrow. "Any sensible person would be. Look at them." He nodded towards the twins, and gestured towards Evrik at the same time. "They're very skilled, and they're scared."

"They don't have as much to lose as you do."

"We have different things to lose," Joen corrected. "If I die, I'll leave Catia and my girls. It's heartbreaking to think about. If one of the twins dies, they'll lose their future. Their ability to have a family, or children. To feel that kind of joy. I'm ten years older than Kor and Ender. Did you know that?"

I knew he was older than all the knights, just not by how much. At twenty-two, the twins were the youngest of the knights. Jalor was much closer to Joen's age. "You're not old."

Joen chuckled. "I know. I just mean that everyone going into the war has something to lose, and something we're trying to protect. Even the Deorans."

I was spared having to think too deeply about his words by Tannix and Acen walking into the courtyard, trailed by Mandell carrying a wooden box. The twins stopped bickering, Evrik stopped killing the target, and Jalor stepped out of his room. In nearly perfect silence, we waited for Tannix to say something.

"Latest reports estimate that the army will reach East Draulin in a week," Tannix said. "Once they're in position, we'll take the navy to meet them. Ideally, taking East Draulin back will go smoothly. Then we'll have to discuss what happens next. Kor, Ender, bring over that other table."

They quietly picked up the table and brought it over to where Joen and I were sitting. With some direction from Tannix, the tables were pressed together to create a larger, square table that would fit all of us. We settled around on the benches, still quiet, and watched Mandell put down the box he was carrying. Tannix reached into it and pulled out two bottles of ale, which he tossed to the twins. As he continued to pass out bottles, it dawned on me what was happening. It was like Tannix sending Acen and Joen to be with their wives, like Acen telling Tannix to celebrate his birthday with his mother and sister, like the knights getting so much time off to travel to their families. This was just another family, another attempt to hold loved ones close for possibly the last time.

Tannix took a spot on the bench beside me and offered me a bottle. Normally I avoided alcohol of all kinds, being drunk wasn't a risk I had ever been willing to take. This time, I accepted the bottle.

The conversation around the table was light at first, but forced. Nobody wanted to think about the war or talk about anything that would inevitably lead to thinking about the war. It was Kor who eventually stood up and made a declaration.

"All right, lads. Listen. We're going to play a game called 'if you weren't part of this illustrious brotherhood of ours, what would you be doing'. Money is no concern. We'll go first." He smacked Ender's shoulder. "So, me'n Ender would have a ship, right? A really big, beautiful Crelan ship."

Ender nodded. "And a big crew."

"And wives," Kor added, grinning. "Beautiful Crelan wives. Lasses who know their way around a ship, aye?"

"Aye," Ender agreed. "Maybe even twins."

Evrik interrupted with a laugh. "You're going to get your wives mixed up."

"No," Kor said. "We don't confuse ourselves, do we? So we won't confuse our wives."

Evrik raised his bottle to his mouth and shrugged.

"All right, mate. Your turn, then." Kor sat down. "What're you goin' to do while me'n Ender are sailin' around?"

Evrik put down his bottle with a decisive thump. "I would marry Valari."

"That woman beat you, mate."

Evrik grinned. "Exactly."

"You're hopeless, mate. That woman would never give you a second glance. She's too good for you."

"Like you two and Captain Sylvaine?"

"All right, truce." Kor held out his bottle, and Evrik stretched to clink his against it. "So, who's next? Mandell?"

Mandell shrugged. "A big farm. View of the ocean would be nice, too."

"You livin' there alone?" Ender asked. "What about a wife?"

Mandell just shrugged again. "Not interested in a wife." His eyes slid over to me and Tannix. "Not interested in a husband, either. Just... not interested."

Identical looks of confusion flashed across the twins' faces, then Ender nodded. "All right. But if you've got a view of the ocean, me'n Kor would have to sail by and wave at you. So you don't get lonely, aye?" He gave Mandell a nudge with his elbow.

Mandell chuckled. "Maybe I'll get a farm further inland."

Ender gasped, pretending to be hurt. Kor had already moved on. "Joen. I bet you'd have the wealthiest, most successful blacksmith forge in the whole kingdom. Am I right?"

"Sounds good," Joen agreed. His eyes flickered down to his leather bracelet. "Maybe a few more kids, too. Lylah and Jeena would like a little brother, I think. Acen, have you ever considered—"

"Of course." Acen held his bottle of ale loosely, and turned his wrist to watch the leftover liquid swirl around the inside. "Gallea and I have always wanted children, but... there's a history, in Lea's family."

Jalor lay a hand on Acen's right shoulder, reminding me that Jalor was Gallea's cousin. "Acen, I had no idea."

"No." Acen shook his head. "We never told anyone." He looked up to see that we were all watching him intently, and he gave a half-shrug, lifting his left shoulder. "Sometimes women in Lea's family have trouble keeping babies. It's a sort of sickness, I suppose. Lea has it. When we found out she told me I could negate our marriage, but I never even considered it. With or without children, Lea is my family."

There was a moment of silence, and no one seemed sure what to say. I cleared my throat, and instantly second-guessed myself when everyone looked at me. But I persevered. "You would be a really good father. Think about how well you take care of all of us."

Acen exhaled sharply, almost laughing. "I guess I did raise the twins and Evrik."

Evrik had another gulp of ale. "You're barely two years older than me."

"Ah, speaking of being old," Kor said, effortlessly bringing the mood back up. "Sir Lord Jalor. Your turn."

Jalor crossed his arms. "Maybe a general in the calvary. All I ever used to want was to be important somehow. I didn't want to become just a note under my older brother's name on our family lists."

"Lords and their family lists," Kor said, like the concept was ridiculous. "Never content to just die and disappear into history like the rest of us."

"Said like a Crelan who didn't raise above his station in life to become part of the West Draulin Guard," Jalor said.

Kor grinned. "Never said I wasn't also ambitious, mate. All right. Last but certainly not least, Tannix and Finn."

Tannix spoke up before I could. "How much about my life am I allowed to change? If I could be anything else, I would choose to be a regular, middle-class person. Someone who could disappear with Finn, and nobody would notice or care. We could live in a city, or on a farm, or even on a ship. That part doesn't matter to me."

He probably expected me to say something emotional, but I wanted to keep up the jovial mood the twins had managed to create. "Well, if I wasn't here, I would be the richest thief in Zianna. I would be so rich and important that most of the lower city would work for me, and even Tandrin would have to have meetings with me. Almost like I was the lord of another city. Actually, exactly like that. I would be called Lord Finagale Lower City. And I would bring you gifts every day." I slid a little closer to Tannix, and picked up his right hand to tap the two rings he was wearing. "Rings, one for every finger. Bracelets, necklaces, nice clothes and delicious food. And I'd make sure the other thieves who worked as my bodyguards would protect you."

"Hmm. Sounds relaxing," Tannix said. "Just getting to lounge around and have someone else take care of me? No responsibilities, no one needing me to make decisions, no more power."

Acen shook his head. "Impossible. You wouldn't relax, and you're terrible at letting other people take care of you." He indicated the rest of the knights with a wave. "We should know."

The men considered Acen's words, apparently all came to the same conclusion, and nodded.

"That's just because I don't want anyone to get hurt," Tannix protested.

"Right, well." Kor was on his feet again, but he was holding one of his small knives. "That's the end of my game, aye? But, Ender'n me have another idea. A brilliant idea." He jammed the knife into the table and dragged it through the wood.

Ender spoke up while Kor carved. "We're all familiar with the Crelan tradition of tattoos, aye? Aye," he repeated firmly when the men nodded. "So sometimes, lads will get tattoos that represent the ship they work on, or places they've visited, and the like. So—"

"A way to bond with the crew," Kor added. He added another line to his carving.

"Aye, right," Ender said. "Mind you, we're not a crew, but we're a brotherhood all the same."

Evrik's bottle clunked against the table. "You two forget how to speak in straight lines when you're drunk."

Kor paused and shot Evrik a look. "Careful, mate. Not too drunk to beat you."

Evrik held out his arms. "With what? That little knife?"

"Gentlemen," Tannix interrupted. "Ender, Kor, we've all realized that you're suggesting we get tattoos. But maybe Kor could explain why he's trying to murder the table."

Kor yanked the knife out of the wood. "It's the tattoo," he exclaimed. It was a crooked cross. Kor stared at it for a moment, then shrugged. "All right, it's 'posed to be a T, right? For Tannix, but also—"

"—to cover Finn's brand," Ender said. "See, we've been thinkin' we should each get this... a better drawin' of this, on our left shoulders. In black and blue. Also, we thought we could each add a unique touch, like our preferred weapons. Something." He shrugged. "So?"

It was the messiest pitch I had ever seen, but it was convincing. It was clear everyone liked the idea, and they turned to Tannix, waiting for his opinion. Every face broke into a smile when Tannix nodded.

"Yes. Let's do it."

It happened very quickly. Jalor pulled out a piece of parchment and a charcoal pencil, and Kor sketched out a proper design. It was the letter T, but with extra flourishes to make it look fancier. Since he was drawing his own tattoo, he included a little arrow to personalize it. When everyone agreed on the standard design, we left the fortress for the Crelans district of the city.

The twins already had a tattoo artist in mind. They volunteered to go first, and disappeared into the shop, leaving the rest of us to wait in the street. It took longer than I expected for the twins to step outside with identical grins. They each had bandaging around their left shoulders, and Ender carefully peeled his back to show us the tattoo. His skin looked red and irritated, and the tattoo stood out dark and shiny. It was nearly a perfect replica of Kor's drawing, with a bow in place of Kor's arrow.

Seeing the finished product encouraged the men. Mandell went next, and one by one the men followed. When it came down to me and Tannix, we went in together.

The shop was brightly lit by candles and a crackling fire. A single chair sat in the middle of the room, and next to it was a stool and a little table covered in ink pots, pins and a scrap of gray cloth. The artist stepped out from a curtain at the back of the room, and smiled.

"Ah, Lord West Draulin. Almost didn't believe it." He was an older Crelan, with long hair and a short beard. His arms were covered in dark swirls, and he was wiping his hands off on another cloth. He gestured at the chair. "Have a seat, my lord. Tunic off, please."

Tannix tugged his tunic over his head and passed it to me, then sat down. The Crelan settled down on the stool, but I saw a second one and dragged it over so I could sit on Tannix's other side.

"What weapon?" the Crelan asked.

"Sword, please."

The artist had Kor's sketch. He drew a sword, then above the T he added a small crown. "Roland's nephews suggested the crown."

Tannix nodded. "All right. That looks good."

The Crelan picked up a little pot of black ink, and one of his pins. Tannix winced the first time he was poked, but then went still. I watched the process silently. I knew about tattoos, just from seeing Crelan sailors. But I had never put much thought into how they were made, and I didn't understand how the ink could just exist in Tannix's skin forever.

Sooner than I liked, it was my turn. My sleeves were looser than Tannix's, so instead of taking off my tunic I simply pushed back the sleeve as I took Tannix's spot in the chair. For the moment the Crelan said nothing, then he grabbed my elbow and turned my arm, his eyes trained to my brand.

He whistled. "Somebody did a number on you, eh, lad?"

I nodded but didn't know what to say. If he recognized what the brand meant, then he would know that I was a thief who should have been locked up in prison.

"You can put the tattoo on top of it, can't you?" Tannix asked. He hovered nearby protectively; arms crossed over his chest. I realized suddenly that I was still holding his tunic.

"Aye." The artist ran his finger over the scar. It tickled, but not the way it had when Tannix touched it. "I've covered scars before, but it might hurt more. Scars can be sensitive, and the skin is different."

I answered Tannix's question before he could ask it. "Yes, I still want it."

"Good lad," the Crelan said. 'What weapon d'you want?"

I'd been mulling it over since Ender mentioned unique touches. Weapons made sense for everyone else, and I could have chosen a knife. But it didn't feel right. I wanted my tattoo to properly represent my place in our brotherhood. I didn't fight. I thought and planned, I snuck around and lied. I'd broken us out of prison and I'd stolen a ship. I told Tandrin to invite Native Zians into the army, and I helped win over Queen Navire.

"A key."

The Crelan drew a key on the bit of parchment, and showed me. When I nodded, he put it aside and picked up the ink. "Try to keep still, lad. I'll go over the brand first, aye?" He pricked me without waiting for an answer.

As he worked, Tannix took my previous spot beside the chair. I dropped my right hand down beside the chair, out of sight, and Tannix took it. He started up a conversation with the artist, and I did my best to focus on it while squeezing Tannix's hand. My left hand still tightly clenched around his tunic.

Finally, it was done, and the Crelan was wrapping a bandage around my shoulder. "Remember the ointment," he said to both of us. "It'll speed up the healing."

"Thank you." Tannix took back his tunic, and picked up the little jar the Crelan had indicated. When he reached into his pocket for money, I waved at him to stop.

"No, wait. I can pay."

"You can?"

I pulled a little pouch of siyas from my pocket. "The knights keep gambling with me." I picked out the right coins and handed them over.

Tannix watched as I hopped off of the chair. "How much money have you made?"

"More than I ever made in a tavern," I said, putting the rest of my money away. The knights were easily the richest people who had ever gambled with me.

Tannix laughed. We thanked the Crelan and stepped outside, into the dying light. It was much later in the evening than I had realized. The men were still gathered on the street, and besides the twins they all looked very out of place. Ender and Kor were beaming.

We walked back towards the fortress. The men joked and laughed, keeping the mood high. The ale was probably helping. I had sipped at my bottle, but part of me wished I had finished it. I wanted to be able to forget what was coming. Instead, my mind kept flickering from man to man, unable to avoid thinking about losing them. How losing any one of the knights would change everything. How this might have been the only chance for us all to get tattoos together.

I shook my head, as if that would dislodge the thoughts. For now, we were all together. I had to enjoy it while it lasted.