The clock blinks 3:09 AM

And the house is still

I'm alone with my thoughts

Thoughts of you

And what we had

You were smart, really smart

I miss the way you held my hand

The memories flow

Like the tears

That run down my face

My chest tightens

And it feels like there's a gaping hole

It leaves me breathless

Like I'm drowning in sorrow

And the memories of your smile

I had loved you at one time

Yes loved

It's the first time I've ever said it outloud

I. Loved. You.

So much that it physically hurt me

I knew we could never be together

Too many forces were keeping us apart

But perhaps in another life time

I can call you mine

But for now I'll lay here

And nurse this sorrow

Until it brings me peace

And for the loneliness?

I'll treat it like an old friend

Until it doesn't leave me

Gasping for breath