Tommy and I weren't on speaking terms,
I needed space and he was staying at a friends house, my parents insisted that the girls stay over until I sorted things out with Tommy which I was pissed about but it's better I have a clear head for the next few days.

I lifted the piano from the attic downstairs to entertain myself and learn new songs, it had been a long time since the last time I played so I was rusty and the only popular songs at the moment are from Tommy's new album and they're all about me so I just learnt them. I had to stop because they were irritating me to the point where I was close to tears, he spoke so perfectly of me to others but it felt different when we were together, we were losing our spark, or did we ever even have that spark?

I sat around for a few hours, sorting through old photos which I had previously forced my mind to forget about, framing some of Lucy as a baby, and Robyn when she was just born. There was a photo of Lucy and I at the park when she was about a year old and we were both laughing, we were celebrating that I had just gotten cast as my character in 'The Clock Strikes' she had a sun protector hat on which always made me laugh so I immediately stick it in a frame.

I laughed and smiled to myself for a long time until I came across an old dusty album with the year 1999-2000, I dared myself to open the leather hard back to find the cutest baby photos of Veronica and I that I'd ever seen, I'd never realised how alike Robyn and I were as babies it was actually kind of scary.
-
"Hey, it's Vanessa, we haven't spoken in a while and I've been thinking a lot lately, it would be really nice to hang out at some point if that was alright with you" I spoke into her voicemail but I quickly deleted it, knowing she'd ignore it.

I sat in the office for most of the day, writing a script for 'The Clock Strikes' every cast member has to write an episode for 'fun' and they're only used as specials like Christmas or easter and of course I was in charge of Halloween which was months away but we had to film it super early so it could be edited in time.

It was rough but they loved it, my character gets locked in a basement and doesn't know how and my love interest tries to save me but drives off a cliff, I originally wrote him in to die but technically I'm not allowed to do that, sadly. It's confusing but it was something and that's all I needed to to, I wrote Stella out of the episode because she's irritating and the kid who plays her son is supposed to die this season anyways so I'm sorted.

There was nothing left to do so I texted Dad and asked if I could come over for dinner but they already had it and the girls were asleep but I still wanted to go.
-
"Don't tell me you guys are still bickering" Dad sighed as I sipped my tea, "he was being childish and irresponsible" I argued, "Vanessa that's two people now" he looked disappointed,

"It's not like I'm getting a divorce" I laughed out loud but had to quite myself when I heard Robyn begin crying, I got up but mom wanted to do it so I let her be.

"All I'm saying is to be careful, these are the people you love and chose to spend most of your life with" he always gave me good advice when it came to this stuff.

"I love you" I smiled, "I love you too" he grinned as I gave him a hug, I gathered my stuff and got back into my car as mom came out with Robyn in her arms who was half asleep, "say goodnight" she whispered as I kissed my daughters forehead and hugged my mom goodbye.

I reluctantly drove home, my head packed with various thoughts and irritations but I did my best to ignore them, I reached our driveway when I noticed the lights on in the house, at first I assumed we had been broken into until I remembered that Tommy still had a set of keys.

"Just go" I sighed as I pointed my car keys at the door, "th-is is my house t-too" he slurred, "you're disgusting" I shouted as one of his friends sat on the couch playing his guitar, even more drunk,

"go sleep outside if you're going to be like this!" I yelled but he pulled my hips close to his. "I love y-ou s-so mu-uch" he laughed as I pushed him away, "get out!" I repeated, grabbing his wrist and pushing him to the front door, "Don't come back until I ask you to" I warned as his friend followed him outside.

I locked the doors and the windows in case he found a way in, Tommy was scary when he was drunk, I've broken up with him several times because of it but he got better when we were married.

There was one time where I was just pregnant with Lucy in our old apartment and I had to lock myself in the bathroom for most of the night, I continuously tried calling Veronica but she was with Chance in France at the time and probably didn't want to talk to me.

He swore he'd never drink after that but I was too scared to sleep in the same room as him so I left the apartment and went home, we had only been married about a month and at that point and I had no clue I was pregnant so having to tell him was awful but knowing I was pregnant during our wedding frightened me. I was still angry and found it hard to forgive him and he didn't know how to feel, I still don't know why he had the sudden urge to come back to me, it's not like he wanted children before 30.

If I'm going to be completely truthful, neither of our children were expected, the only reason I found out about Lucy was because of my mom, she caught me getting sick one morning after I left the apartment and immediately made me take a test which I was not happy about.

It's not that I didn't want a child but it wasn't the right time and I thought I was too young but I was wrong, I told Tommy over text which was really 'romantic' of me and he thought I was lying until I literally had to take a test in front of him, he took his time to apologize and his time to decide if he was gonna stay with me. I didn't move back in with tommy for about three months because I was honestly traumatized that night, I had nobody and I thought we would... hurt me.

Robyn on the other hand was a calm surprise, Tommy, Lucy and I had just moved into this house when I found out but timing wasn't great, my character on 'The Clock Strikes' had two choices, either to be pregnant so I could stay longer or to be temporarily killed but only for a season so I went with the pregnancy option and 100% regretted it. Tommy and I came to an agreement to be more... careful, family comes first but career is a close second. Robyn completed the family, I've never wanted only one child, even if it means all of them were surprises, two kids were enough in my eyes but apparently Tommy wanted more.

I tiptoed upstairs to my bedroom but grew paranoid so slept in the downstairs bedroom with the door locked, just in case. My mind slowly drifted off to begin its sorting, getting rid of memories I cherished with Tommy, what we did on our first date, our proposal and most of our wedding day, the happiest day of my life just, gone.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading!💜 sorry about the long wait I just finished exams and after coming back from holidays but now I'll be more active😊