"you got me a christmas present?" jimin asked, excitedly, "what is it? can i open it now?"

the two were over at joon's house and jimin was desperately trying to figure out what gift namjoon could have possibly got for him. it was the two's first day of christmas break and they were excited to spend the time together.

"no, not till christmas," namjoon said, with a small laugh.

"come on! i won't even be here on christmas! i'm going to my mom's house, remember?"

namjoon stopped for a moment, at the realization. he hadn't thought about jimin leaving for christmas, but now that jimin mentioned it, it made perfect sense. of course he would be going to see his mom. a big part of christmas was about family, after all.

"oh yeah..," namjoon said, "well, christmas eve, then. you can come over... if you want. we can make cookies and watch christmas movies and stuff."

jimin smiled, with a little nod, not wanting to admit joon's idea did sound pretty fun, "fine."

jimin hopped off of joon's bed and grabbed his bag, knowing he needed to head home before it got too late, so he could get a start on his boatloads of winter break homework.

"i should go," jimin said, a little sad, "i'll see you tomorrow, though?"

namjoon smiled with a nod, "yeah. meet at the café?"

"okay! get there by twelve and don't be late. i'll be waiting at our regular table, with our drinks and danish," jimin said, laughing a little.

namjoon couldn't hold back a big smile, chuckling at jimin, "okay. i'll be there."

the two just laughed with each other for a minute, eventually both settling down with small smiles still on their faces.

and namjoon couldn't help but notice that something felt different.

nothing felt weird or bad... just different.

"don't forget!" jimin shouted, one last time, before walking out of joon's room, and heading out the front door to walk home.

namjoon just sat there for a minute, a smile still lingering on his face.

forget?

how could he possibly forget?

joon quickly adjusted himself on his bed, so he was staring out the window, watching jimin as he started his walk home. he looked adorable-all bundled up in his winter coat and hat. by far, he was the most beautiful, perfect, person namjoon had ever met in his life.

he couldn't believe how desperately he wanted the boy, how much his heart longed for him. joon hadn't ever felt like this towards anyone before.

he was scared to admit it, but he was pretty darn sure he knew what the feeling was.

pushing the thoughts away, he continued to stare out the window, longingly, before he heard a noise behind him and quickly turned around.

he saw his grandfather staring at him from his doorframe and immediately tried to cover up whatever it was he was doing.

"grandpa, i was just-"

"you love him, don't you?" sung-ha asked, watching namjoon's face turn to a look of shock.

joon could barely move.

"w-what?"

sung-ha quickly spoke up again, "jimin. you... you care for him, right?"

namjoon just stared at his grandfather, completely bewildered.

"i... i'm just-" joon started, beyond nervous, not sure what to say. 

namjoon just fell silent, not saying anything.

and before he knew it, unexpected tears started welling up in his eyes as his grandfather looked at him.

it was silent and namjoon desperately tried to hold his composure.

but he couldn't do it.

tears started streaming down his face, quickly trying to wipe them away.

his grandfather's mouth parted, a little surprised, not expecting the sudden display of emotion.

"joonie," he said, sympathetically, walking over and sitting down beside him, putting a hand on his back.

"i-i'm sorry," namjoon wept out, more tears streaming down his face.

sung-ha felt awful, pulling him into a hug and rubbing his back.

they stayed like that for a minute, namjoon trying to calm down and catch his breath.

eventually, joon's grandfather pulled away a bit, wiping the tears from joon's red face and running his fingers through his hair.

"you don't need to explain yourself to me, namjoon. i love you so much and nothing- nothing you tell me could ever change that," he said, smiling at him, "when i was your age... people didn't get the opportunity to be themselves. people that just... loved who they loved would get beaten or... thrown in prison. it was horrible. you... you have the opportunity to be yourself now, joonie. people fought, so people like you could have a better life in the future. and if you love that boy, you shouldn't hide it," the man said, passionately, "and i like jimin, i really do. you don't find boys like that everyday," he said, with a small laugh.

namjoon just did a small smile back, nodding, a few more tears falling.

"i-i'm scared, grandpa," namjoon said, still crying, "what if... what if he doesn't feel the same. what if he doesn't want to be my friend anymore once he finds out."

sung-ha shook his head.

"that doesn't sound much like jimin, does it?"

joon just sat there, letting the words sink in.

it didn't sound like jimin.

"no... it doesn't," joon said.

sung-ha nodded.

"whether he loves you like you want him to or not, joon, he does love you. and he would never just abandon you over something like that."

namjoon nodded, leaning in and hugging his grandpa tightly.

"i love you so much," joon said, into his shoulder, "i don't deserve you."

sung-ha quickly separated, grabbed onto the sides of joon's face, and looking him straight in the eyes.

"you do, namjoon," he said, "and so, so much more."

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double update 🤪🤪

y'all i've had this chapter written since like chapter 4 and i've wanted to put it up so bad ever since djdhdhdh 😭😭 hope you all liked it!!