"alright, class. i've got some good news," professor kim said.

the boys were sitting in class, waiting for the bell to ring.

jimin perked up immediately, namjoon still scribbling down the last of his notes, not paying much attention to what was going on.

"i'm sure you're all aware of the poetry contest that was being held," he started, "well, i'm ecstatic to announce... the winner is actually sitting here in this room."

jimin heard whispers and mumbles around the class, bouncing in his seat, excitedly.

namjoon looked over to jimin, suddenly becoming aware of the excitement around him.

"although it doesn't surprise me, considering this man is at the top of our class, i am still very excited to announce," he started, "kim namjoon, you are the winner of the fall writing contest!"

namjoon looked up at his teacher, his mouth falling open in shock and confusion.

jimin squealed and the whole class started to applaud him.

"your poem has been submitted into the national writing contest!" their teacher announced, "i have your five hundred dollars as well, along with your certificate."

the whole class was in a stir, shocked that someone from their class had won.

namjoon just sat there, beyond confused.

he stood up from his seat and quickly walked down the steps to his teacher.

"congratulations, namjoon," he said, handing him his winnings, "i knew you had it in you."

namjoon shook his head.

"sir, there must be sort of mistake. i didn't-"

his teacher just laughed, shaking his head.

"there's no mistake here, namjoon. although, i do enjoy how humble you are."

namjoon shook his head.

"sir, i didn't-"

"you are the brilliant writer of, a caged bird, are you not?"

namjoon's eyes widened.

"i-"

and suddenly, the bell rang.

"i know it's a bit overwhelming, but don't fret, namjoon," professor kim said, walking back to his desk.

and suddenly, namjoon was being greeted with congrats and high fives from classmates he had never even spoken to.

and when areum got to him, he was greeted with a huge hug.

"you didn't tell me you entered!" she said, smiling, "that's amazing, joon! let's get dinner later to celebrate."

aruem walked off with her friend, cho, and before he knew it, jimin was by his side.

jimin was smiling big, practically gushing.

"congratulations!"

namjoon just stared blankly at the paper and money in his hands, pure confusion and embarrassment overtaking him, not believing how many people must have read his poem by now.

"t-thanks."

namjoon started walking out of the class, trying to wrap his head around everything, jimin following.

"jimin... i... i didn't enter the contest," namjoon said, once they made it out of the building, "i wasn't gonna enter. i...it wasn't me."

jimin just laughed, shrugging.

"who cares, namjoon! you won! i knew you would win!"

the boys walked a few steps further towards the café, namjoon stopping when he processed what jimin said.

"you knew i would win?" he asked, confused, "what do you mean you knew i would win?"

jimin just bit his lip, trying to hide his smirk.

"i just... i know how amazing a caged bird is, that's all," he said with his smile widening.

namjoon's mouth parted, clearly shocked.

"did you..," he started, looking straight at jimin, "did you submit my poem?"

jimin was silent for a moment, then burst out into laughter, not being able to hold it back.

"fine... yes!" jimin said, happily, "i knew you would win, joon! you're amazing!"

namjoon's face stayed straight, not sure what to say.

jimin's smile faded soon after when he saw how distressed joon looked.

"what's wrong?" jimin asked.

joon still stayed silent.

"you're not mad at me, are you?"

namjoon just stood there for a moment, then shook his head, not saying much.

"no... i'm fine," he said, then continued walking.

-

the boys had stayed together for most of the day, joon only saying a few words to jimin.

he was quiet at the café and at the next class they had together.

and now, jimin was over at his house, sitting on joon's bed with a pout, still feeling ignored.

"come on... what do you want to do?" jimin asked, not liking namjoon being so distant to him.

"i...i don't care, jimin. whatever," namjoon said, scrolling through his phone.

jimin sighed, grabbing namjoon's phone away, and looking at him.

"you're mad at me."

joon just sighed, shaking his head again.

"i'm not ma-"

"you are! i can tell," jimin said, sorrow on his face, "i'm sorry, joon. i thought submitting your poem was the right thing to do. i wanted you to win. i-i did it for you."

namjoon just looked at him, finally making eye contact.

and for the first time, joon looked utterly pissed off.

"did you?" he asked, sitting up, "did you do it for me?"

jimin was a bit taken aback, never having seen this side of joon.

"o-of course i did. why else wou-"

"cause you wanna know what i think?" namjoon asked, anger laced in his voice, "i think you did it for yourself."

jimin looked confused.

"w-what? what do you mean? i-"

"you did it, so you could say you were right and i was wrong," namjoon said, harshly, "i told you i didn't want to submit my poem. i told you i wasn't ready."

jimin looked beyond apologetic, seeing how upset namjoon was.

"joon, i'm so sorry. i just thought-"

"no. you didn't think. you didn't think about anyone but yourself. you... you keep trying to... to change me," namjoon said, getting himself worked up, "and... and push me out of my comfort zone and... make me all... outgoing and unreserved. you don't respect me... you don't think about how i feel... about what i want."

jimin just sat there, completely shocked.

"and... and no matter how much you try to change me and... push me into this box... i'm always gonna be myself underneath it all. i'm always gonna be the shy, embarrassing, dork that just wants to be alone and watch sailor moon all the time. i'm never gonna be... all cool and funny and... perfect like you. i'll never be like that," namjoon said.

of course, namjoon didn't mean everything he said. he was just upset... maybe even a bit jealous of jimin, without even realizing it.

jimin was looking at him, tears almost coming to his eyes.

he felt horrible.

"namjoon, i-i'm so sorry. i didn't think you'd react like this. i just wanted to make you happy, really. you know me. i'm not trying to change you, joon. i love you just the way you are," jimin said, grabbing onto his arm, "i just... i can tell you're holding back a little and... not being yourself. i just wanted to help you. i...i didn't realize..."

"what do you mean, 'not being myself?'" namjoon asked.

jimin just looked at him, hoping he wouldn't get more upset than he already was.

"just... i don't even know for sure. i can just tell."

namjoon looked even angrier, getting ready to lash out.

"just say it, jimin! what the fuck am i hiding?"

jimin gained some courage, becoming slightly upset as well.

"areum, okay! damn it! you clearly don't like this girl. why are you doing this? why are you lying to me... to her?"

namjoon just stared at jimin for a moment, his anger calming- just slightly as jimin took an authoritative stance.

his eyes lingered over jimin's nose, eyes, lips.

and for a second, he really thought about telling jimin the truth.

he thought about letting go. he thought of telling jimin why he was always on edge, always hiding. telling him why he was dating aruem, why he was lying so much.

he just couldn't do it.

"i'm not lying to anyone, jimin. i-i do like her. why would i not?"

namjoon felt heavy, guilt building inside him.

and the look on jimin's face only made it worse.

"you're lying to me, namjoon! i know you're lying. you can't just lead this girl on," jimin said, seeming actually visibly mad at namjoon for the first time.

and it scared him.

it scared him that he'd let himself get so close to someone, that they were comfortable enough to be angry with him-

that he was comfortable enough to be mad back.

he had no real reason to get so upset at jimin, aside from the fact that jimin submitted his poem without joon's consent. everything else the boy said was right.

he was always right.

and maybe, just that fact, was the reason namjoon was so mad in the first place.

"why do you think i'm lying?" namjoon asked, the anger building again, "why is it so absurd to you that i would like her? why are you so..."

"so what?" jimin asked, edging him on.

"so... jealous?"

jimin looked enraged.

"jealous?" he snapped, "you think i'm jealous... of... of you getting to date that... that generic malibu barbie?"

namjoon nodded.

"yeah. i do think you're jealous. why else would you be so concerned with my relationship all the time? why else would you care?"

namjoon was angry. not actually because jimin liked his girlfriend, but because jimin didn't like him.

the realization felt like a heartbreak, even though they were never even together in the first place.

even though namjoon always knew the feelings were one-sided, it hurt realizing just how one-sided they really were.

namjoon looked back at the boy, his anger immediately fading when he saw jimin.

the boy had tears streaming down his face.

and namjoon felt nothing but guilt.

he was the reason for jimin's tears.

it was his fault that the boy he cared so deeply for was sad.

"it's... it's like i don't even know you," jimin said, looking up at him and using the back of his sleeve to wipe off his face.

jimin stood up and quickly grabbed his bag off the floor, heading out of namjoon's room as fast as he could.

namjoon called out for him not to go, quickly trying to get off the bed, but as soon as he heard the front door slam, he knew it was too late.

jimin was gone.

_______________________________

minjoon's first fight :((

hopefully that was enough angst for u guys lol. i have the rest of the story planned out already so i'm super exited to write it!

i also wanted to say thanks to all my new readers ! i really really appreciate the comments/votes while i'm trying to grow my story! 💗💗