To say the least, I am flabbergasted. I do not know who this man is who just came up and kissed Dhruv. I take a step back, giving them their space. Yes, they need theirs, but I need mine too. Whatever is transpiring in front of me is not what I expected. I admit I never thought of Dhruv as the most normal person around. I have seldom thought of people as normal, and with no definition of normal, I do not even know what I try to imply at times. I think it happens to everyone.

He looks at me apologetically, as he is led to his own room by this man. As the door shuts behind them, my imagination is about to run wild. I am transfixed in my place and most probably appear horrified. I am not appalled by him. What he does, who he chooses to kiss, who he chooses to sleep with- these things aren't my concern. I have no interest in knowing-assuming that is the ideal stance to bear-but I feel it is something I must know if I am to stay here for a month. If this is going to happen daily, or even frequently, I must prepare myself to not be taken aback in the future. A gentle breeze hits my face and I feel some sand with it. Determined to ask him tomorrow, I finally turn. Mayank is looking at me. He takes a few steps towards me. He gauges my expression.

Fifteen minutes later, both of us are in the living room with a glass of whiskey each. He has barely taken a few sips while narrating Dhruv and Shashi's-I find that's what he is called-story, while I have almost emptied my glass. I drink whatever remains and go for a refill. Once he is done narrating everything, he pauses for a while. We sit in silence. The long case clock strikes ten. I look at the swinging pendulum and it reminds me of Dhruv. He is somewhere, but he is nowhere. Potentially discarded by his family as the next heir, he might get thrown out for peanuts. This ancestral house then would be the only thing that would remain his. I was a fool to mention that. He did not overreact. Probably, what I am thinking of right now is already his reality.

Before I realize, I have started tearing up. I feel my cheeks hot. I sniff to hold back my tears. Upon seeing Mayank's concerned face, I wave it off. "It's just alcohol." I contemplate whether to inquire further or leave it at that. I do the obvious. "How have you kept it under wraps? How did the media not get anything on it?"

"That has been particularly difficult. He can never be spotted with any of his boyfriends. Whatever happens, has to happen here. Hotels aren't safe either. There were two instances when media houses found out about this. The company's PR team had to undergo a lot of trouble to shut their mouths. It cost us a lot, but we managed it." Mayank sighs and takes a sip. "It is difficult to be gay when you are from a conglomerate." He might be saying it in a lighter tone. He might understand what Dhruv is going through.

However, what is he actually going through? Does anyone know that? Has anyone asked him? I decide not to broach the topic tomorrow. I reckon it would make him uncomfortable. As it is, we aren't the best people to get along to begin with. If I stir the topic and it makes matters worse, we might not be able to finish the project. The project is important to me. It is my biggest bet to secure my shares and consequently my spot on the board of directors. If I get involved in his mess, I stand to lose a lot. He is on the losing side anyways; he won't be harmed with some more losses. But that's not the case for me. I have to win. With Yashika, there would be immense expansions in our respective companies' sectors and portfolios. To fill my brimming plate with his problems is not on my agenda. Yes, I will do only what I came here for and leave. Nothing more, nothing less.

I head back towards my room. As I am standing in the courtyard, I am enveloped by silence. Dhruv's room is locked this time around. The one time it was ajar...Shashi must not have left, since I never heard a car leave. Honestly, I didn't hear one arriving either. I don't know. I repeatedly tell myself to keep my nose out of it. I reach my door and just as I turn the knob, I hear another door opening. Before they see me, I enter my room and shut the door behind me. Why am I acting this way? I didn't even do anything. Next to the door, is a window looking into the courtyard. I draw the curtain from one side and give myself enough space to peek out.

They are holding hands. They talk for some more time standing there, before Shashi embraces Dhruv. I can't believe this man! Doing things out in the open. I have always been a person who has detested PDA. Most couples around me are straight and I have never liked them being all close either. Seeing a gay couple- I don't even know what to feel about it. They are still hugging each other. Before drawing away, Shashi gives Dhruv a long smooch-if that's the correct term-on his cheek. Shashi leaves.

I look at Dhruv. I now notice that Dhruv's hair is a bit messy. Did they make up? If so, then he should be happy. Yet, I perceive profound grief in his eyes. A grief that is gnawing at him from within. He, who was all confident until now, is slumping. He turns and makes his way to his room, shutting the door behind.

His exit from my field of vision leaves me alone to contemplate upon my ridiculous thoughts. All I can think of is what happened behind the closed door for half an hour. I have no answer to it. I do not want to imagine. I hear my stomach growling. Acidity, caused by anxiety, yet again. My head has begun pounding, all thanks to my reckless gulping down of alcohol. Pathetic.

The next morning, Mayank is driving us to the architect's office. From the information I have on the project, the architect is the one who has designed all of Sanghvis' hotels. I assume he is the one who designed the haveli too. He is based in Jaisalmer, and hence, we are heading to his office in the main city. We encounter the morning traffic as usual. Dhruv is sitting beside me in the backseat. We haven't spoken a word since yesterday. He hasn't looked in my direction either. He is wearing his sunglasses and looking out of the window. There is a file lying open on his lap, and his veiny hand is on top of it. I look at the files in my hand, but don't know what to do with them. I look at the rear view mirror and make eye contact with Mayank. He looks at me for a few seconds before focusing on the road again. If he did try saying something through his eyes, I did not get it.

We reach the office and get down from the car. Dhruv is wearing a white shirt and jeans and he looks unnecessarily tall in his outfit. I am wearing a striped yellow shirt with white pants. I think I look shorter. Does not matter. I am here for business. Mayank holds the door open for us, and I follow Dhruv inside. The architect's secretary-if that's who he is-approaches us and gives a huge smile to Dhruv. Dhruv takes off his sunglasses and smiles at him, extending his hand for a shake. Stop, my thoughts, stop.

"Welcome Mr Sanghvi. It's been a long time.", he says.

"I was here last week." Dhruv says with a chuckle. Ridiculous.

"Please." The secretary-let him be that-shows us the way.

The building shouts architecture. The office, which is cubical from outside, is filled with curves inside. The main lobby, where we just were, had a semi-circular reception. To the left of it, is an entrance leading to workspaces. This entire lobby has an arch, which, if more elaborate and floral, would have looked like a wedding archway. We take a right to reveal a lounge in what seems to me the middle of the building. There is a spiral staircase with a pillar in the middle. It has wavy cement railings. The architect's office space is behind the staircase, well-concealed from unwanted people. Nice shot.

Just as we are about to enter the office, Dhruv leans in towards me and whispers in my ear. "Let him finish suggesting before you give him your two cents." I find the hair on my arms standing. My half-sleeved shirt is not helping. I nod while rubbing my arms nonchalantly, and we enter the office.

The architect-Manish Sisodiya-is a man in his late fifties with salt and pepper hair. He is dressed rather casually for the owner of the firm- a full-sleeved t-shirt and jeans. I feel overdressed here. We shake our hands with this man and take our seats across him. Now, as ill-fate would have it again, both of us try taking our chairs from the middle, thereby bumping into each other. This is not what we want at this point. I clear my throat and we take our seats. Mr Sisodiya gets into business right away. His secretary pulls down the blinds and switches off the lights. He turns on the projector, and now we see the layout plan on the huge screen behind Sisodiya.

Sisodiya gets up and starts speaking. "Since we plan to make a majority of operations in the hotel solar power based, here are some areas which can effectively operate on solar energy. First, we can use them for all the lawn lights. We can also use them for the window lights on the exterior. The hotel is going to be made of yellow sandstone, so incorporating the solar panels into it would be difficult. What we can do is make the panels look like embellishments-like marble of glass-and put them around the balconies. They won't be visible, and still get incorporated into the design. These panels can power some appliances in the respective room. We can do the same with the walls." He shows us a 3D model of the fixtures. I observe it closely.

"Using panels as embellishments? It won't serve the purpose. The panels need to be either vertical or diagonal. If flat, they need to have some distance from a solid surface. What are you trying to suggest here?", I say.

Sisodiya makes a face which says that he knows better than me. He is in no mood to be schooled by a kid half his age. "I have been in the architecture business for close to four decades now. I know better."

"Definitely. I do not doubt your knowledge about architecture. However, I have better knowledge when it comes to renewable energy sources. Solar cells won't serve their purpose if used as embellishments."

I find a pair of eyes piercing into me. It is not the pair across me, but the one beside me. Sisodiya merely gives me a condescending look and resumes speaking. I do not agree with half of what he says, but try keeping my calm. Dhruv isn't fully focused on Sisodiya either- he is watching out for me.

"...if we take all of this into account, not more than thirty percent of the hotel's operations would work on solar power. Maximum, forty percent.", he concludes. He puts on some more pictures on the screen for us to see.

All of it is in vain if the fifty percent target doesn't get achieved. This person is trying to pull of his own might and discard the agreed upon plan as if it does not matter. I have to speak up and tilt the issue in my favour. I can't be on the losing end. I can't.

Just as I open my mouth to speak again, I find his hand on my thigh. I gulp back my words. His hand stays on my thigh. Firm. Unmoving. I look at the veins making themselves visible as he tries holding me down. This is bad. What disturbs me further is that his hand is not lower down on my thigh. That's where it should have been. Ideally. Rather, it is dangerously close to my crotch. What is he trying to pull off here? I am not like him. He stands no chance with me. I'll have to set things straight between us. He cannot make a move on me right after he did whatnot with that ex-boyfriend of his. I slowly place my hand on his and try removing his hand from my thigh. I fail miserably. His grip is stronger than I presumed. He grabs my fingers trying to wriggle under his palm and holds them tightly. This guy is asking for it. Shortly after, the presentation ends and he lets go of my hand and thigh.

We leave the office, with me being highly dissatisfied. The mood in the car is tense. Mayank keeps looking at me through the rear view mirror, but all I do is look out of the car. I can see Dhruv's reflection in the window. He is looking at me, waiting for me to say something. I won't say a word until we get back. Even if it means that everything goes downhill.

We enter the house and Dhruv grabs my hand in the courtyard itself. "What was that?", he asks in an agitated voice.

"I put forth my opinion."

"In that manner?"

"In what manner should I have done it then? He was giving me the most ridiculous suggestions. All of them were impractical."

"You should have let him finish. He knows how to incorporate things into the structure. Solar panels haven't been around for a short time, and neither has he in this business. He must have dealt with it enough times to know."

"And yet..."

"And yet you do not have the patience to listen to someone.", he snaps. His grip on my arm keeps getting tighter. I free my arm from his grasp and look at the part where he held me. It has reddened. "You need to have the last word, right? Go ahead and have it. Nothing is going to stop the construction of this hotel. You can be a part of it, or choose not to." He turns and heads towards the stairs.

"You think of yourself all high and mighty? What were you trying to pull off there by grabbing my thigh? Is that the only trick you can pull off to keep someone's mouth shut?", I yell at him.

He walks back towards me. He stares at me. I realize I have offended him. I did not mean it, but I did it. Bringing his face close to mine, he hisses, "I don't think highly of myself, but you do about yourself. That's precisely where you are failing." He stops at that. He does not answer the other question. He owes me an explanation.

"I'll abandon this project, cancel the agreement, and leave.", I warn him. It is my try at putting up a brave front. I can deal with his hand on my thigh later.

"If you have enough courage, you are free to.", he replies curtly before heading upstairs.

He does what nobody else ever could. He catches my cowardice.