"I discovered infinities within your eyes and I fell within the dark depths of your soul"

❃ B l a z e ❃

The smell of antiseptic and bleach clung to my nostrils as I slumped in the rigid hospital chair. It had been two hours in the waiting room as we anticipated a report on Jonah's dad, who was still in surgery.

"Should I get Jo food?" Rafael murmured from beside me and I nodded. The others were in the Cafeteria, grabbing snacks and giving Jonah his space after he snapped at everyone.

Anxiety rolled off Rafael, further condensing in the air as he dug his teeth into his bottom lip. I knew it was because of his accident.

I remembered him saying he had spent a month restricted to a hospital bed, and another three shuttling between physical therapy and visits. His fear of hospitals was justified. However, Raf was here and I knew that mattered to Jonah.

Once Rafael was gone, I inched towards Jonah who had been staring at the glossy linoleum floor for the past ten minutes.

"Hey," I placed my hand on his and he jerked away.

"Hi," Jonah's voice was thickly laden with exhaustion and my heart sunk into my stomach. The colour had seeped out of his skin, gathering at his fingernails which he was constantly nibbling on.

Jo hadn't responded to any of Travis' stupid jokes to cheer him up or Summer's attempts at consoling him. All of them fell into the drain when Jonah retreated into himself.

"Any news?" He shook his head, ebony hair flopping over his clammy forehead.

"No, my mum's still in the OT," he whispered, tearing at the broken skin around his fingernails and I gulped a deep breath.

His mother was the nurse who had been assigned his father's case in the ER and I couldn't imagine how heartbreaking it must've been to see her own husband on the stretcher. After she had called Jonah while crying, we'd all rushed here. Even Rafael's Dad had offered to help but Mrs. Alston declined.

"It's going to be alright," I murmured, knowing how hollow the words sounded.

His father was in a head-on collision with an SUV while he was on his lunch break. The other driver had emerged unscathed while Mr. Alston had suffered brain injuries and multiple broken bones.

"Really? You're suddenly a doctor now?" He snapped and I winced, pursing my lips. The reaction was uncharacteristic with his calm composure but I understood his climbing anxiety.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled straight after and I shook my head.

"No, you're right. It was a stupid thing to say," I reprimanded myself and he flashed me a weak smile.

"You can be dumb sometimes so I'll let it slide." I pretended to be offended by his statement, gasping.

Jonah just smiled softly but it fell when he glanced down the hallway leading to the OT.

"Do you really think he's going to be fine?" Jonah asked, his flushed face tearing up. His head fell onto my shoulder and I rubbed soothing circles on his pulse point, calming the pounding heartbeat underneath.

"Well, you're a fighter. He is too," I squeezed our interlaced fingers and he nodded vacantly. Jonah's breathing was wild against my collar bones, causing my concern to soar.

The silence was heavily strung with impending anxiety and as the seconds passed, the air became thick.

A door creaking caused our heads to snap up, the anticipation cresting. After noticing a doctor clad in blue scrubs making his way over to us, we stood up and I reassuringly squeezed Jonah's hand.

"Is he okay?" Jo rushed out and I silently prayed in my head that the answer was positive. I wasn't a complete believer, but right now I really hoped that good news would be delivered.

Turns out someone was listening because the doctor nodded with a minimal smile, a swift rush of air huffing out of Jonah's mouth.

"We're going to keep him in the ICU for a few days and then move him to a regular room after. He's in a medically induced coma for the time being and once his condition is stable, we'll put him off the medication."

"But he's going to be alright?" Panic set into Jonah's tone, rugged and afraid.

"There is a possibility of permanent muscle function loss in some areas but other than that, we're hoping for a full recovery." With that, the doctor excused himself and Jonah turned to me.

A relieved smile spread across his lips and his arms wrapped around my middle.

"You were right, Dr. Davis," he whispered with a chuckle.

When Jonah pulled back, I saw his mother bounding towards us, her hair ruffled under the surgical cap. Mrs. Alston's face was streaked with tears as she banded her arms around Jonah and I slowly slipped away, giving them their privacy.

Just as I rounded the corner, I collided with Rafael and he dropped the huge bag of crisps in his hand.

"Jo's Dad is okay," I blurted out and Raf looked up as he leaned down to pick up the bag.

"Oh, thank fuck," he exhaled in relief, a half-hearted smiled on his mouth.

"That was terrifying," I murmured and Rafael nodded, pulling me into his side.

"I know, babe," his lips grazed my forehead, the concern slowly easing out of my body.

"Well, Jo and his mum are still there so we should go somewhere else." As soon as the words left my mouth, Summer came hurdling around the corner.

I should've named it the collision corner because she almost slipped and her elbow jabbed sharply into my ribs. A pained groan tumbled past my lips and Rafael glared at Summer frostily, his lips turned up into a sneer.

"Is Jo okay?" she ignored Rafael's clenched jaw and I nodded with a small smile. Before I could say anything more, she snuck away and sprang towards Jonah.

"Calm down," I furrowed my brows at Rafael. He was still taking some time to warm up to Summer, which was evident through his indiscreet glares and suspicious looks.

"She better not hurt Jonah," he curled his finger towards Summer, a frown bending my lips.

"Cool it, there you go again with your psychopathic tendencies," I pretended to sigh in frustration and a slow smile morphed on his face.

"Well, you don't seem to mind."

"Shh, only behind closed doors," I raised a finger to my lips and Rafael fought to hold back a beaming grin.

"Someone's in their honeymoon phase," Travis whistled as he appeared behind Rafael, receiving a glare in return.

"Mr. Alston's okay, right?" Ann and Bree asked simultaneously.

"He's in a medically induced coma for now," I explained and the others nodded solemnly. Peeking my head around the corner, I noticed Summer talking to Mrs. Alston and a small smile spread across my face as they smiled at each other.

I didn't think Summer would hurt Jo.

"Back to the Cafeteria?" I asked and the others scrunched their noses.

"The food's terrible but be my guest," Bree frowned sourly.

"I'm hungry," I muttered. It had been seven hours since I had last eaten and my food reserves were dying, in desperate need of being replenished.

"I'll come with you," Raf shrugged and a secretive grin twisted Travis's lips.

"Of course you will."

I had to pull Rafael away from strangling Travis who had a smug smirk on his face.

Rafael's eyes shifted around nervously as we took the elevator to the ground floor and I grabbed his hand, his fingers interlacing in the gaps between mine

"You okay?" I asked and got a hesitant nod. 

"Brings back bad memories," he shrugged, sweat slowly beading on his smooth skin and I squeezed his fingers. The door dinged open and silently, we walked to the hospital cafeteria.

As Rafael left to get food, I scrolled through my phone and smiled as I saw all the supportive messages on the group chat, mainly by Travis.

"We stand by your side from afar, homo sapien" read a picture with an alien aboard a spaceship.

Travis was a weird dude.

"The quesadillas are the only good thing on the menu," Rafael muttered as he placed my tray in front of me.

"I'm converting you to a devotee of Fanta," He slid the metal can towards me, an excited smile playing on his lips and I scrunched my nose up.

As I munched on my quesadilla, I refrained from edging Rafael on by commenting on just how anxious he seemed. It was evident by the way he was tearing the tissue into shreds and bending the laminated menu at every angle he could.

"Talk," he sighed.

"You look like you want to say something, so, go ahead." I smiled meekly as he narrowed his eyes.

"Right. I was just wondering if you're doing okay," I blabbered and his lips tilted up in amusement.

"To be honest, no. I don't like hospitals. It's like I can almost smell flesh and death in the air." A creepy smile crossed his face and my lips parted.

"Odd thing to say for a cannibalistic serial killer, Taffy," I snorted and he rolled his eyes.

"I'm joking."

I cleared my throat, steering the conversation back to him, knowing he was very good at dodging serious topics.

"Was the accident really bad?" I asked hesitantly, gauging his reaction. When I detected no hostility, I was glad I didn't overstep.

"Let's see. I had a pneumothorax, basically collapsed both my lungs because of multiple broken ribs and I also shattered my radius and ulna on both arms. Oh, forgot about the broken clavicles and multiple injuries to my face there, silly me," he flippantly remarked and my breath hitched.

Rafael's face gave away no emotion, a blank stone wall with no detectable cracks. However, I could see pain flickering deep within, blanketed by his thick sarcasm.

"I'm sorry for asking," I murmured, pushing my food around on the tray. Distorted images of him in a hospital bed, tied up to multiple machines graced my vision and I flinched.

"No, it's fine. It was just tough." His rueful smile tugged at my heart and I reached my hand across the table to grip his palm.

"Well, look at you now, all handsome and conquering life." I winced at my extra enthusiasm and chuckles frothed up Rafael's throat.

"You're weird, you know that right?" he quirked an eyebrow.

"Well, do you mind?" I retorted, prompting a goofy grin.

"Nah, I love it." Both of our eyes widened as soon as he said those words.

Typical relationships didn't include love confessions in the first month, but damn was I willing to break that rule. It's not like we were conventional either.

Were we even in a relationship? It's not like we used that word.

"You done? We should go," Rafael drummed his fingers nervously on the table and I nodded. Conveniently ignoring his statement, I scarfed down the rest of my food.

The momentary peace was interrupted when Travis raced into the Cafeteria and jumped on the seat beside me.

"Did you just run here?" I asked as he slammed his palm over his heart and starting huffing like he was having an asthma attack.

"Yeah, the elevator was full," he puffed and stole a sip from my Fanta.

"What warranted that sprint?" Raf quirked an eyebrow and Travis smiled meekly.

"How good are you with kids?" He turned to me and I blanched. I would say not good, considering I'd never been around them in my entire life.

"Why?" Rafael narrowed his eyes suspiciously and Travis propped his chin on his elbows.

"You know I love you guys, right?" he tilted his head onto my shoulder and I shoved him away. This reeked of a conspiracy.

"Get to the point," Rafael gritted out and Travis gulped down another large sip of my drink, burping loudly after.

"Well, Jonah needs a babysitter for his siblings, his regular one is out of town. We thought it was the perfect job for you two," Trav grinned lightly.

"Who's we?" I raised an eyebrow and he flopped his hand in dismissal.

"Oh, that. Ann, Bree, Summer and me. We like to call ourselves the anti-babysitting club," he murmured.

"Why us?" Rafael interrupted and Travis sighed dejectedly.

"Well, look. Summer has work in an hour, Ann and Bree hate kids. Me? Now, see kids demand too much attention and I don't like to share my spotlight with anyone," Trav blurted out and I stifled a laugh as Rafael's jaw clenched.

"We're talking about four year-olds here, T. I don't think they'll 'steal' your spotlight," Rafael rubbed the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"Great, well you can have fun with those four year-olds," Trav grinned sweetly.

"Oh, and if Jonah asks, you offered to do it," He raised an eyebrow before going back the way he came, with my Fanta can nonetheless.

"Are you good with kids?" I turned to Rafael. With his lips quirked up in a sly smile, he nodded.

"The best of the best." The excitement on his face was barely hidden.

"So, you actually like kids?"

"Yeah, of course. I had a kid sister." Ever since we'd talked about Cairo, this was the first time he'd mentioned her without guilt swarming his face and it warmed my heart.

"How about you?" he cleared his throat and I smiled sheepishly.

"We'll see today." A huge grin spread across Rafael's cheeks as he leaned forward, kissing my lips swiftly.

"Looks like we're babysitting after all."

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"Both of them are allergic to hazelnuts, give them anything but that," Jonah murmured as he walked towards the kindergarten to pick Emery and Everett up. They had a weekend party, the chocolate smeared faces of most kids proving their fun time.

The chatter of preschoolers talking and laughing around us brought a strained smile to my face. I just hoped Jonah's siblings weren't as loud.

As if reading my thoughts, Jonah flashed me a toothy grin, his earlier whirlwind of emotions reduced to an ebbing wave.

"Em and Rhett are well behaved so you won't have to worry about them."

Just as he said those words, two kids came bounding towards us, their backpacks swinging around their tiny forms.

"Hey, Jojo." The little boy wrapped his arms around Jonah's leg, who blushed deeply at the affection. Everett's hair was identical to Jonah, silken and coloured a dark ebony.

Amusement laced Rafael's face as Emery tucked herself behind Jonah's other leg, away from our prying eyes.

"These are my friends. They're going to be watching you today," Jonah gently tugged at Emery's tiny hand as she failed to meet our eyes. Their eyes were the same shade, swirling with grey streaks.

She was cute, her face flushed a deep red, although maybe a bit shy. At least they didn't talk much because I don't know how I'd handle that.

Everett shuffled towards me, leaning his head against my thigh with a bright smile on his face. Rafael scowled at the four year old as he ignored Raf's encouraging grin.

It was clear who was the favourite.

A smug smirk made its' way to my lips as Everett grabbed my hand. His tiny fingers clasped around my pinky and ring finger loosely considering the size difference.

"Em, you can let go now," Jonah tried to unravel her grip from the back of his jeans but she clung on, bunching the denim between her tender, small fingers.

"No, thank you," she mumbled, her voice soft against the raucous noise.

"Oh look, a four year old has more manners than you," I grinned at Rafael who just scowled, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly.

"Please," Jonah gently patted her head and she shook her head, burying her face away from our view.

"Hey Emery, want to see something?" Rafael took a step towards her and she shuffled back, her eyes lowering to the ground.

Jonah looked confused as Rafael pulled the sleeves of his crew neck sweater up, revealing inked skin. That served to make Emery hesitantly step towards him, her dusky eyes still flitting around nervously as she poked at his tattoos. 

I did that too, twinsies.

"They're pretty," Em's tone was a gentle murmur and Jonah looked relieved as she hesitantly took Rafael's hand, tightly clinging onto his pinky finger.

Rafael shot me a proud grin over his shoulder and waggled his eyebrows as he walked her away from the school.

Asshole.

Emery's ponytails bounced as excitement broke through, a small smile on her face as Rafael talked to her about something.

"Look at you two, you're doing great so far," Jonah sent an encouraging thumbs up my way and began walking us to his car, the only one with car seats.

Once near the car, Jonah taught Rafael how to strap them into their seats.

"For heaven's sake, please don't swear around them. They're four," Jonah rasped out once the kids were in the car.

"Me? I'm offended, Jo," I raised a hand to my chest and he raised a questioning eyebrow.

"Call me if you need help," he smiled and with that, he waved to Em and Rhett and made his way over to his car. Jonah's engine thrummed as he pulled away, the twins faces squished to the windows as they leaned out of their car seats.

Once Jonah was gone, Rafael hesitantly shuffled in the driver's seat and looked around nervously.

"What's wrong, rich boy? Never driven a stick shift?" I grinned at Rafael and he glared at me.

"Have you driven at all?"

My lips parted in shock, smugness unfurling on his face.

"I have, now let me drive," he huffed out and I glanced at the two kids on the back who were looking out the window quietly.

"Okay, got it," Rafael murmured and jolted the car forward. My knee slammed into the glove compartment. I glared at Rafael as he reared off the sidewalk, steering unusually slow.

"Next time we're walking," I muttered as he clenched his fists around the wheel. The car drive was monotonous and I hummed to myself to fill in the terse silence.

"How was school?" I glanced at Emery and she didn't answer, silently nibbling on her bottom lip and staring outside.

"I made a Lego spaceship," Everett grinned proudly and I returned it. Well, at least someone was talking.

"Emmy read an entire book in class," he added proudly, blabbering on about his day. Could four year old's even read that much? That was impressive.

"Oh look, a four year old is smarter than you," Rafael mimicked and I glared at him, slamming my fist into his shoulder.

Everett was quite a chatty kid considering I now knew the names of all his friends, imaginary and real. I also found out that he thought his kindergarten teacher was pretty, which prompted a sly smile from Rafael.

Emery, on the other hand, hadn't spoken a word since we were in the car. Her grey eyes were fixated on the road and her silence reminded me of Jonah's reserved self.

"Want me to open the windows, Em?" Rafael glanced at Emery and she shyly nodded.

Rafael creaked the window open halfway and the wind whipped her two ponytails around. I saw a smile cross her face as she leaned to the edge of her car seat, her eyes slightly hooding as she felt the breeze on her ivory skin.

Adorable. 

"She's smiling," I excitedly nudged Rafael and a pompous grin plastered on his face. Jerk.

It wasn't a long ride home and once we were at Jonah's house, Rafael unclasped their car seat belts and they ran towards the front door.

A realisation struck me and I slapped my hand on my forehead.

"We don't have a key," Rafael muttered as he saw my face and I nodded.

"Off to a great start here, Blaze." I glared at his snarky comment.

"Me? You were there too, dipshit," I hissed out and Rafael's eyes widened.

"Hey, no swearing around the kids," he motioned towards the two who were standing patiently by the door, waiting for our next move.

"Do you know where the key is?" I asked Em and she shook her head, confusion clouding her ashen eyes.

Right, we were supposed to be the responsible ones here.

"Call Jonah," I elbowed Rafael and he frowned.

"You do it," he held out his phone.

"Why? Is your male ego getting in the way?"

"Excuse you? I have no ego," Rafael scoffed. "Besides, I'm holding their schoolbags so obviously you have to call."

"Right, because that's such a hard task to do. You're basically the human embodiment of Atlas," I muttered while dialling Jonah's number.

"Hey, Jo," I drawled out happily once he picked up, his sharp sigh prickling my ears.

"The key's in the soil of the Mandevilla pot in a Ziploc bag. Don't arrange any robberies," he stated as if he was waiting for this moment.

"Oh okay, thank you," I glanced around the flower pots.

"One more question, Jo. What exactly is a Mandevilla?" Butchering the name, I heard an annoyed click on the other end.

"I'm not a botanist, I'll send you a picture." My cheeks flamed in embarrassment as he hung up.

Once he sent the photo, Raf and I successfully located the plant. After much convincing, he shoved his hand in the dirt and pulled out the keys from the bag.

"Well, at least they're creative," I laughed as Rafael glared at me, the soil sticking under his fingernails.

"Okay kids, let's go," I shuffled towards the door and let them inside, Rafael following with their school bags.

My eyes roamed around the house as I entered, the soft cream walls and homely décor radiating a warm feel. My sock-clad feet sunk into the carpet as I padded over to where Em and Rhett were in the kitchen.

"Hungry?" I asked and they both nodded eagerly.

Just then, Rafael came into the kitchen and placed their bags on the counter. Em waddled towards him and he lifted her up, placing her on one of the stools. She smiled at him as he booped her button nose.

Oh, so he wanted to compete for the coveted title of the better babysitter.

Everett turned to me and I grinned smugly at Rafael as I did the same, perching him on the stool beside Em.

"Okay, so what do you want to eat?" I clapped my hands together, hoping they would answer. However, the kids just stared at me blankly.

"What do four year old's eat?" I murmured to myself and Rafael snorted.

"Food, Blaze. It's called food."

"Shut up dumba ... dorkbutt," I corrected myself when I remembered the no swearing rule.

"Fruit?" I offered and Everett's ebony eyes dimmed. Oh, that was a no.

"Ice cream?" Rafael interrupted and toothy grins split their faces. I frowned.

"It's winter, do you want them to catch a cold?" His face blanched as he glared at me.

"Fairy bread is the best bet," he suggested in an attempt to recover.

"What's that?" Everett jutted his bottom lip out and Rafael gasped beside me, dramatically raising a hand to his chest.

"You don't know what fairy bread is?" That prompted guilty looks as the twins shook their heads softly, pulling their bottom lips into their teeth simultaneously.

"Don't worry, we'll get you initiated into the cult," Rafael grinned.

"What's a cult?" Emery's soft-spoken voice was taxed with confusion and Raf gulped nervously.

"We're not supposed to tell them, right?" he turned to me and I rolled my eyes.

"No, dorkbutt. I'm pretty sure it's not on the curriculum for pre-school," I rubbed the bridge of my nose.

We were going to ruin Jonah's innocent siblings.

"Well, it's a group of friends who you play with, like the ones you have at school," Rafael cheerily explained. That was the worst definition I had ever heard.

"Like Mr. McSnowy?" Everett chimed in innocently. I nodded at the mention of his imaginary elf friend.

"I don't have friends," Emery looked down at the counter, rubbing her pointer finger absently on the marble. A thin line of tears edged her waterline as her chubby cheeks turned crimson.

Sympathy gleamed in Rafael's sage eyes as he propped his head on one palm and gently grabbed her finger.

"I'll tell you a secret. Only fairies can eat fairy bread, and you're the Fairy Queen," he booped her nose and a reluctant smile split her supple cheeks.

"Humans don't understand magic, that's why they're scared to be your friends," Rafael added as he leaned back and Em nodded slowly.

"Are you my friend?" Genuine curiosity laced her tone and Rafael nodded eagerly.

"Fairies have to stick together," he ruffled her hair before grabbing the bread and butter out of the fridge.

I stood frozen as I distantly heard Emery finally talk. She narrated her day and seemed proud to inform us that she had completed 'Uni the Unicorn'.

"It was easy. Ms. Harrison said she would give me harder books." A giggle escaped her lips and I smiled.

"She's definitely Jonah's sister," Rafael murmured as he began buttering the bread.

"Want me to help?" I offered and he shook his head furiously, rummaging through the cupboards for sprinkles.

"It's an art, Blaze. These kids need to be taught the right way."

I scoffed, sitting beside Everett who leaned his head on my arm sleepily. I brushed my fingers through his soft hair as Rafael cut the slices into mini triangles, decorating the top with sprinkles.

"Three for the queen." Emery grinned.

"Three for the queen's brother." Everett smiled.

"And one for the kingdom peasant." I glared venomously.

"We can share," Everett pushed his plate towards me and I smiled at the kid who cared more than the guy I had the displeasure of loving.

"No, it's okay. I was just joking," Rafael grumbled as he handed me the other two slices.

Rafael munched on his own share as Everett continued chattering. Apparently, he had also married someone at kindy today.

"So, how's your wife?" Rafael suppressed a smile when Everett blushed, rubbing at his cheeks.

"She's pretty," Everett nodded to himself.

"Of course, it's the only thing that matters, little man."

"Ms. Harrison is not Evey's wife," Emery grumbled in displeasure as she held her palm out for more fairy bread.

"But I gave her a flower, Emmy," Everett sounded hurt as he turned to his sister, his bottom lip wobbling.

"You stole it from Scarlett's daisy chain," Emery retorted.

She attempted to steal a slice of bread off Rafael's plate. Emery's tummy was half on the counter before Rafael grabbed her up and into the air.

"No stealing," he frowned playfully and she nodded solemnly, a fearful look etched into her grey eyes.

When he put her down, she ran out of the room with the fairy bread in her hand and Everett stumbled after her, almost falling off the stool.

"Are kids supposed to run in the house?" I turned to Rafael and he shrugged.

"You're micro analysing here, Blaze." An amused smile met my gaze, a scowl etching onto my lips.

"I don't think Jonah would appreciate it if they got hurt," I frowned.

"Chill, we're doing great," Rafael appeared in front of me, leaning forward and waiting for me to close the distance like he always did. When I did, he pulled away after seconds, leaving an insatiable hunger in my stomach.

It wasn't for food.

"Babysitting is easy," he grinned as he leaned against the doorway, running his finger along my arm.

Easy he said.

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"Are kids supposed to fight like that?" I snapped at Rafael who huffed out angrily.

"I don't have a child, babe. It's my first time too," he glared at me.

"Babysitting is easy," I mimicked while I slumped back on the floor in front of Rhett and Em who had their backs turned to each other.

The pages they were drawing on were now shredded to pieces after they fought over a crayon. It prompted a round of crying and a narrow brush with physical violence which Rafael thankfully shut down.

"Hey, Rhett," I edged towards him and he was looking down at the floor, digging his fingers into the carpet.

"Hi," he whispered and shot me a small, apologetic smile. He was an angel, at least until he tore all of Emery's drawings into pieces after she borrowed his crayon.

"Want to apologise to Em?" He sharply shook his head with a pout and I poked his plump cheek to gain his attention.

"We've got enough toxic male ego in the world, tiny man. We don't need more. Can you please apologise?" Confusion shrouded his raven irises but he slowly nodded.

Very slowly.

Pivoting on his bum, he turned to face a teary-eyed Emery.

"Sorry Emmy," Everett's voice was genuinely remorseful as he tapped on Em's thigh.

"It's okay," she whispered, and Rafael crossed his arms over his chest, pretending to intimidate Everett.

"Now, I'm going to be handling the crayons and if you want one, you ask me. Capeesh?" The twins looked confused as Rafael ordered them.

"It means do you understand?" Rafael was trying to be serious but I could see the smile playing on his lips. Em and Rhett nodded. I handed them their new sheets of paper, removing the torn ones.

"Look at you being a crayon dealer," I nudged Rafael as we sat cross-legged on the floor with the kids and he scoffed.

"Better than being a drug dealer, huh?" He grinned and I slapped my hand over his mouth.

"Keep it kid appropriate." The warning was too late because Everett turned to me.

"What's a drug dealer?" Both Raf and I stilled at his question and laughed nervously.

"Drug dealer? No no no, he said hug dealer," I grinned at Everett as I crawled over to him.

"What do they do?"

"They deal hugs," I grinned shakily as I pulled the two into my arms to mask Rafael's stupid mistake. Everett and Emery giggled lightly as I tightened my hold around them, momentarily glaring at Rafael who raised his hands in surrender.

Eventually letting go of them, I shuffled back beside Rafael and he slung his arm on the couch behind me as I glowered at him.

"Let's hope for your sake that these two fuzzballs don't ask their mother why they can't go to the drug dealer," I whispered harshly.

"We'll be fine, you worry too much," he waved dismissively.

"I actually know Mrs. Alston, so I have a reputation to uphold."

"Oh yeah, what reputation?" His lips quirked in a cocky grin.

"A simple, innocent straight A student." An incredulous scoff slipped past his mouth.

"Yeah sorry, none of that is true." Rafael's finger trailed across the nape of my neck and then towards my shoulder blade. My breath hitched as his fingernail gently scraped against the hollow of my neck.

"Orange crayon, please." Two voices interrupted us and Rafael's hand stilled.

"I asked for it first," Everett frowned as he glanced at Emery and I could sense another incoming fight.

"No I did, ask Taffy." Taffy was too busy getting handsy, Em.

Rafael didn't throw a hissy fit as Em called him the nickname, rather he grinned.

For four year olds, Em and Rhett had quite the anger as they glared at each other.

Grabbing the orange crayon from beside Rafael, a solution morphed in my mind. I broke the crayon in half and instantly, three shocked stares turned to me.

"You broke the crayon?" Rafael gritted out incredulously.

"Yeah, so? Now they can both use it." I didn't get why he was looking at me like I'd killed someone.

"You never break kids crayons, Blaze. They do it, not us," Rafael whispered harshly and I froze. My gaze swivelled to the twins who looked both angry and hurt as they stared at me.

Oh.

"Those were the expensive ones, they're non toxic and asbestos free or some shit," The sharp hiss left Rafael's lips and my face fell.

"That's alright, we can fix it," I chuckled nervously. I had seen somewhere that they melted the crayon to stick it back together. That would work, right?

"I liked orange," Everett whispered, looking hurt as he pouted at me.

"Why did you break it? It was new, Jojo got it for us," Emery stuttered out, rubbing her fist over her eyes and I winced. I didn't know breaking a crayon was equivalent to a war crime in a child's rulebook.

"Look, there are still eleven more colours," I pointed to the pack in Rafael's hand, making him glare at me.

"I want orange," Everett murmured, looking downcast and Emery mirrored his words.

"Okay, I'll fix this." I didn't need another fight or crying session.

Rushing to the kitchen, I grunted in frustration when I realised I didn't know how to melt a crayon. The orange residue still stuck to my fingertips after a failed attempt which left the disfigured crayon looking like Squidward's nose.

"Okay, you got this," I murmured to myself as I heard Everett complaining about the orange crayon to Rafael, who mirrored his grievance.

An idea sprung in my head, and I fished through the fridge for the base material.

Baby carrots.

Once I found the bag, I began chiselling using a knife to the best of my abilities so it resembled a crayon. It was lighter in colour but it would have to do.

I could just tell them it was new that's why it wasn't working.

Repeating the same to another carrot, I grinned to myself when I saw the finished product. I was quite the craftswoman if I did say so myself.

Holding the two carrot crayons in both hands, I advanced back to the living room and gave one each to the twins.

"Wait is that..." I cut Rafael off with a hiss as Em and Rhett examined my master creation.

"Blaze, they're four years old, not four months old." The amusement in Raf's tone annoyed me and I flipped him off behind my back.

"How do you even come up with this stuff?" Rafael chuckled hoarsely, earning a scorching glare.

Turns out I wasn't too good because Emery sniffed the makeshift crayon and then took a reluctant bite.

"It's a carrot, Evey," she whispered in horror at her brother and I pouted to myself. I did all that just for them to figure it out in under a minute?

Everett and Emery spun their heads to face me, disbelief glimmering in their dark eyes. I gulped nervously, waiting for a reaction.

Seriously? Now I needed validation from preschoolers.

Silently, they held out the crayons with frowns as if to portray their disappointment and I took the carrots back. Rafael held his fist over his mouth as his eyes watered from the force of holding back his laughter.

Jackass.

"Hey, don't worry I'll eat one," he held out his palm and I huffed, slamming the carrot crayon onto it.

"Well, I'm proud of you," he whispered, placing his hand back over the sofa, inches away from my shoulders.

"Extra brownie points for effort," he leaned in, his hair tickling my collarbones. I bit off a piece of my carrot and ignored his finger drawing patterns on the nape of my neck.

"Green crayon please," Emery and Everett's voices rang out simultaneously and Rafael grinned.

"Get the celery ready, babe."

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

A yawn tumbled past my lips as I leaned back against the sofa, feeling Raf's fingers rub soft circles on my waist.

"Jonah's getting home in ten minutes. His mum's working the night shift," Rafael murmured softly from beside me and I nodded drowsily.

The twins were tucked in upstairs after an odd fairytale from Rafael involving a fairy and Darth Vader. I don't know how he made it work, but they believed it.

After a visit from the hug dealer, they had reluctantly fallen asleep.

"Hey, Raf. Can I tell you something?" It was a topic I had been thinking of breaching for quite a while, but I was too insecure and scared to talk about it.

"Yeah, what's wrong?" he tucked his phone into his pocket and turned around to face me.

"Okay, so you know how people our age date?" I winced and Rafael seemed confused.

"Yeah, Blaze. People date. Are we dating?" Amusement pulled his mouth up and I bit my bottom lip.

"That's not what I'm saying. Focus," I reprimanded and he schooled his features into solemnity. He nodded for me to continue.

"And you know how they do... things?" his eyebrows furrowed and I gritted my teeth in both frustration and embarrassment. Why was this so hard to talk about?

"Things, Raf," I motioned weirdly with my hands and his eyes flashed with realisation.

"Oh, those things." A light pink tint coated his cheeks and I cleared my throat to clear the awkwardness.

"Yeah, I'm not... ready for that, okay? So, I get if you want to, you know, dump me or something. Or maybe trade me in for someone who... helps you in that department." Oh fuck, death seemed like a good option now.

I expected anger, disbelief or even a slow nod from Rafael but what I didn't expect was an outburst of chuckles.

"Did you just say trade me in?" He shot out through a round of hysterical laughs and I cringed at my wording.

"Well, I just thought you'd want that," I murmured, suddenly feeling embarrassed. I looked down at the carpet, twisting the hem of my tee.

"Hey," Rafael murmured softly all of a sudden, his laughter gone. His finger tugged my chin up and I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from saying something even more mortifying.

"I'm sorry for laughing, but don't tell me to trade you in. I'm never doing that."

Okay, maybe I was a little dumb for saying that.

"My brain is in my head, not in my pants. It's always going to be at your pace, alright?" he smiled, placing a fleeting kiss on my cheek before he leaned back against the sofa.

"Yes," I muttered, my cheeks flaming as I pretended to be busy on my phone.

"Besides, makeouts in the pool work just as good," he jibed playfully and I gasped sharply, glaring at him.

"That's not happening again, your dad wouldn't appreciate it," I grumbled, remembering how he had lectured Raf and I for ten minutes on how we should be more careful and that we could've drowned in the swimming pool doing stuff like that.

That's when I understood where Rafael got his dramatic impulses from.

"I'll convince him." His smug smile was wiped off his face when I punched his shoulder.

Thankfully, I didn't have to engage with Rafael in another humiliating conversation because the front door opened, revealing an exhausted Jonah. His glossy hair was ruffled as he hung his car keys and slumped on the couch beside me.

"You okay?" I turned to him and he nodded, covering his yawn with the sleeve of his rumpled jumper. Fatigue lined every plane of his face, his fingers crimson from constantly nibbling on the edges.

"Were Em and Rhett good?" Jonah asked softly, exhaustion weighing down his tone. His eyes fluttered shut and concern flared in my stomach.

"Yeah, they were amazing. Did you eat?" I asked. Jonah shook his head, still not opening his eyes as he slung a slender arm over his face. Out of habit, I raised my hand to his forehead to check for a fever and he cracked a grey eye open.

"I'm not sick, Blaze. I just didn't get time," he mumbled.

From the corner of my vision, I saw Rafael get up and go to the kitchen. The sound of the microwave beeping told me he was reheating the pizza we had ordered earlier.

"How's your Dad?" I asked and Jonah sighed deeply.

"Still in a coma, I spent the entire time in the waiting room of the ICU. I've got to help my mum file for insurance later too." Another yawn brushed past his lips and I propped a pillow beneath his head and grabbed a blanket off the adjacent recliner. Brushing his hair away from his clammy forehead, I wrapped the blanket around his torso, tucking the edges under his back.

He shifted onto his side and I gently ran my fingers through his slightly knotted hair, his breathing slowing down.

Rafael came out of the kitchen with the reheated pizza and a can of Sprite a few minutes later as I silently observed Jonah's faint chest movement.

"Hey. You have to eat, man," Rafael nudged Jonah's shoulder, worry creasing his brow and Jo reluctantly got up.

"Thank you," he mumbled under his breath and chewed half heartedly on the slice.

There was an awkward stretch of silence as we waited for Jonah to finish eating. I knew if we left, he'd end up ditching his food.

"What happened there?" Jonah nodded towards the torn up drawings in the trash can and I smiled meekly.

"Emery and Everett fought over a crayon," I explained and he nodded in understanding.

"They're alive though, right?" Jonah glanced between the two of us suspiciously and my mouth gaped open.

"I'll have you know we did an amazing job," I pointed between Raf and I. Rafael nodded furiously, seeming offended by that statement too.

"So, you'll do it again?" Jonah asked, the corner of his lips smeared with pizza sauce.

"Of course, Jo. You don't need to ask."

His dimmed eyes enlightened with gratitude and he ate the rest of his pizza slice with small sips of his drink. His pale neck shifted with each bite, the veins underneath delicate and thin.

"Thank you for being there today," he murmured as he came back after putting his plate in the sink.

"Come on, we're past the formalities phase, man," Rafael grumbled and Jo nodded hesitantly.

"Hug?" I extended my arms out in true Travis fashion and Jonah smiled.

Jo shuffled into my arms and I clasped mine around him tightly, nestling his head into the crook of my shoulder. The soft fabric of his jumper warmed my skin as his back gently trembled with each breath. Despite his efforts to stay strong, I could see him slipping.

"You're doing great," I whispered in Jo's ears, feeling his soft hair against my collarbones as he clung on tighter. 

"Thank you," his voice trembled and a lump budged in my throat. The pain in his voice was distinct, pronounced by gentle cracks.

Jonah reluctantly dropped his arms and when he pulled back, I saw all the repressed emotions in his teary eyes.

"Call me if you need anything, okay?" Rafael offered from beside me and Jonah nodded. When another yawn edged out of Jonah's mouth, I nudged Rafael towards the front door.

Just before we left, I heard Rafael call out to Jonah and what he said next left a grateful smile on Jo's face.

"We're getting through this together."

hi hi! i'm like so sleepy right now and i haven't edited this so i apologise for that. i'm already expecting the "i hate kids" comments on this chapter so bring em on lmaoooo.

thoughts on the chapter and the new cover?

question: favourite throwback song? recently, britney spears and akon are really making me jam out.

please tell me i'm not the only one who loved the ketchup song, i knew all the lyrics as a kid lmaoo.

take care of yourself, you're amazing and always come first.

love
a