A/n : Hey Guys please know you have published the album and everything. Now you are at a QnA and I'm gonna put a video that I'm very mad at it as does not fit BTS at all.

🚫WARNINGSUICIDALTHOUGHTS🚫

Your P.O.V.

It's been two days after we published Persona and I'm very happy and excited. We have shed many blood ,sweat and tears producing this album but it's all worth it. Armies have blown up about it. We are currently at a QnA which I'm very excited for as last year I had not been to one. We are currently at the conference backstage quickly getting a few touch ups. We all grabbed microphones before we exited the backstage to be met with what looked like thousands of reporters. I breathed in as I haven't had such a good history with some Interviewers or Reporters. We made our way on stage and introduced ourselves before we sat down. The order was :

Tae, Sweetness, JinJin, Kookie, Me, ChimChim , Joonie and Hobi.

We sat down and looked down at the paper to see papers with questions from armies that we could answer. I grabbed my pen and played with it between my fingers. The conference had started.

( Bold - You/BTS Member, Italics - Reporter, Underlined - Action. Thoughts - **. Normal - Normal Stuffs )( All new questions are a new reporter. Also Know that it may be in Third P.O.V sometimes.)

We had all agree to start on the left side making our way to the right.

"This Question is for Yn do you possibly have any new works coming up in future? "

JY : Possibly or Possibly not.

I smirked reading a question on my paper after my answer. I awed at a question on my paper it said ' Noona what's your favorite animal? ' I giggled replying while writing ' Unicorn.'

" Yn on your recent album Persona with your bandmates am I correct when I say you have composed most of the songs?? "

I nod

JY : That's correct but we work as team, we write and compose as a team.

Most of the questions asked were normal but that's until the fire had really started to burn.

"Yn what is your weight? "

All of Bts had frozen in place before they took a second to look at you, you had sad and disappointed eyes. You then dropped your pen feeling uncomfortable in a room of people who probably looked and weighed better than you. You wrapped your arms around yourself.

JY : T-That's not y-your information to know s-sorry.

I had said it with such a shaky breath through the mic that if I wasn't given a mic you wouldn't even hear me. I played with my pen looking down one arm still wrapped around my waist trying to hide myself, I couldn't look up and let them see my glossy eyes.

" Oh then, I'll just guess what is it...... 80kgs. "

The reporter laughed making the all audience of reporters chuckle in amusement. I felt tears already run down my eyes. That was just cruel and unnecessary.

JK : I did not think that was right of you. May you please apologize?

" But why? "

Before Jungkook could answer Jin stepped in.

SJ : Because lessening one's self esteem is not right.

" It was simply a joke. "

RM : Joke or not it's still not right to do that knowing that person is very sensitive to such topics.

" Oh my, then I apologize, it was not my intention to harm or hurt you Miss Yn. "

JY : It's alright.

I tried my best to sound as if I wasn't crying and it did a great job but it wasnt as convincing if you knew me well.

*What that reporter said wasn't just nothing, it really fractured my small self esteem. I'm been trying really hard for the past year to believe I'm beautiful and it's been working with the armies and the boys' motivation but all that work was for nothing it shattered just like a piece of glass dropped on the floor piece by piece I was broken again. *

Jungkook grabbed my hand that was messing with the pen lacing it with the one that he wasnt using to write with. He caressed it slowly with his thumb kissing it from time to time whiles Jimin did the same just by rubbing my back.

"Yn you have been I presume getting quite a bit wider and we want to ask are you pregnant? "

What the next reporter had broken  Yn more than she already was. The boys already felt their hearts break and shatter they didn't like seeing Yn like that. They hated it actually.
They couldn't believe what these reporters were asking.

JK : For a first she is not getting wider if you mean stronger and with muscle then she has been working out with me, and such inappropriate questions won't be answered here and if she was or wasn't she still wouldn't tell you.

By now Jungkook was getting very mad at all the harassment his girlfriend was getting. He was irratated and just wanted to leave the QnA right now. Yn quickly turned her paper around writing on it. ' I'm coming back, I just need some air. ' . She slid her paper over to Jungkook who read it as he kissed her hand nodding. She then slid it over to Jimin he read it patting her back.

JY : Excuse me.

Yn quickly said through the mic. Before she stood up walking off stage before she ran into her dressing room. She quickly sat on the makeup desk chair and cried her out for about a minute before she lifted herself up. *No more crying*, I'm done crying because of Reporters' stupid and unnecessary questions but their not wrong I am fat and ugly.

JY : I hate myself, I'm just a fat ugly crybaby. You should stop eating you cow. Your so ugly and disgusting how can anyone stand your face. You can't even stand your face.

Little did Yn know someone was recording her whole rant and degrading of herself. A minute later she wiped her tears away and went back on stage with a blank expression on her face the smile she had before was now gone. She sat back down as the members asked if she was OK, she just nodded and wrapped her arm around herself holding Jungkook's hand again to possibly hold herself in case she wants to cry again ,she took her other arm off and started writing on the paper again, she taught herself how to be ambidextrous . The reporters had asked questions that had almost been the same as the previous two terrible and cruel towards Yn. She didn't say anything about it, she just answered their questions hurting deep down on the inside it her self esteem really bad she felt as if she had no self esteem whatsoever. Every question the reporters had asked broke her even more and more, it was if she couldn't be shattered anymore than that. She honestly felt like she wanted to die and end all the voices and terrible comments ringing through her head. She felt so..... bad about herself it was unimaginable how much she hated herself. The next question shook her pretty well.

" Yn you have been accused of plagiarism of your song 7 Rings by Princess Nokia and Souja Boy what do have to say about that? "

*I was confused and shook as I had not expected such a question, I was expecting something about my appearance. * I answered the question blankly and confused.

JY : I'm sorry but I don't even know, who these people are ,if it seems like I copied or familiarised their works, I haven't and it's simply coincidence. I truly don't know anyone of those people or the accusations of the songs I 'apparently' plagiarised. I truly don't know them or the songs whatsoever, thank you.

" Y/n how dare you call yourself a K-pop Idol, when you sing in all English, what a disgrace you are to your country and industry, what do have to say for yourself? "

* It's like her words were telling me to stop being an idol, to just give up and stop. Maybe she was right the world doesn't need me ,  bts was perfect right before I came. Now I put my country and my company to shame by not 'writing or singing' albums in Korean, I have done both of those but she doesn't seem to know. But I'm gonna atleast try and defend myself, I'm so done with this world right now. * I just looked at the woman right in the eyes staring into her soul basically.

JY : I am allowed to write or sing in whatever language genre, I please. That is for me and my company to decide.

" You should write albums in Korean not English, how stupid are you? Your a disgrace. "

* Instead of being sad, I was mad and disappointed. I don't feel like crying anymore. I'm emptied out. This over right now. *

JY : Your basically telling me how to do my job. It's like me telling you how to be a reporter with no experience whatsoever.  I write in Korean I do but I prefer my albums to be in English rather. Call me a disgrace, trash, rubbish all you want but I'm so done with this, I can't even care anymore that's how I'm so used such comments.

* I had said my little speech calmly but you could tell I was hurt and mad. I was really hurt, I'm so done with this world. I feel like just dying right now. *

" Yn what characteristics do you think you have to be an idol?  I mean look at you.... Your not as pretty..... Your not as small and skinny as other idols..... You don't dress nicel-"

JY : I know, I know, I get it. Enough with the questions that will be all.

I said sighing. * I wasn't even gonna deny it. I know it's true so what's the point. I knew the guys are gonna be angry at me for not even defending myself but I don't feel like it at all. I know their trying to mold me out of my insecurities but I always seemed to get back into that mold and it's gets bigger and bigger each time. *

TimeSkip-After Hours Of Torture
Your P.O.V

The Conference is over and we're back home, I'm not gonna bother eating nor am I gonna bother arguing with the guys. It's enough for one day. I'm really am not in the mood. I went straight up to me and Jungkook's room and faceplanted on the bed not forgetting to lock the door. I then started crying, I cried my eyes. I was so hurt I just felt like killing myself. Jungkook doesn't know this but I have lately been on BTS Twitter page and I was reading all the comments majority of them were nice and beautiful but there's always that one bunch that has something negative to say. I knew I was gonna get hate but I didn't think it would be as bad. I couldn't help myself but look on the twitter pages. I grabbed my phone and unlocked it to see a picture of me and Jungkook kissing at the beach Namjoon took it.  I gave the picture a weary smile before I opened the twitter page with blurry eyes. I looked and there I saw the press conference announcement, there's was various videos of the whole conference. I opened a random page and scrolled down the comments :

*Y/N ignore those stupid reporters the were no good for you.
* That reporter was right Y/n is so UGLY, why is she in a band with all those perfect and skinny guys.  She should  just go and die.
* Who put that worthless cow in the band?
* BTS was perfect before Y/N came!! Why did they have to add an elephant.
* Y/n your so smart and pretty.
* I love you Y/n.
* I didn't know BTS had a troll in the band.
* Y/n your beautiful!!

I cried at all of them, I couldn't be bothered anymore. I exited the page making sure to delete the history or any trace that I was on twitter. I changed out of my dress to hear hurried footsteps coming up the stairs. I stopped in my tracks looking in the Full Body Mirror. I was looking at a Monster. A fat and ugly monster. I glared at myself in the mirror before I heard someone try and open the door.

" Y/n please open the door baby. " I heard Jungkook say softly. I looked at the door tears already spilling out. I sniffled quickly.

" Maybe later. " I said Loud enough for him to hear. I heard him sigh.

" Baby you know what they said will never be true, ever. Please  I beg you don't do anything stupid. I love you so much, we all do. I'm gonna give you some space, alright please call me if you need something and YOU NEED to eat. " He said before I heard his footsteps fade into the distance. I sighed knowing I wasn't making him happy and I was making him worry. What he meant by stupid was that............. I once tried to kill myself it was once, I couldn't handle my life at that time. Jungkook saved me just before I died and I'm thankful to him every single day of my life for saving me. But he knows that the comments will get to my head and I'll try it again that's how well he knows me. I sighed putting on my pajamas before I got in my blankets lying on my side facing  Jungkook's side of the bed. I cried my eyes out not caring if someone heard me or not. I have been like this for about an hour and I feel tired and drained but I don't care, my feet made their way to the bathroom getting a shaving razor. I looked at the razor in my hand and my wrist. What should I do?!? I should-No I shouldnt-I should-No don't be stupid- Do it your doing the world a favor- . I dropped the razor on the floor scared of what I was doing before I unlocked the door. I immediately heard footsteps coming up the stairs. The door bust open and Jungkook entered. He grabbed my hands looking at my wrists up and down making sure my skin wasn't pierced in anyway. He sighed in relief but he looked in my eyes sadly. I just gave him my sad and glossy eyes. I hugged him tightly crying my eyes out on his chest. He embraced me tightly not caring if his shirt was wet or not.

" It was nothing  But crap what they all said. They should all go and screw themselve-" I tightened my grip on his shirt.

"P-Please don't s-say a-anything. P-Please. " I begged Jungkook, he nodded on my head. Embracing me even tighter. I heard the door open, I didn't bother to look I was too busy emptying out all my liquids.

" Maybe not right Tae Hyung . Come tomorrow. " Jungkook whispered softly. I heard Tae sigh before he said sorry and left closing the door.

Jungkook laid us on the bed rubbing my back as I cried and cried until I couldn't anymore. I eventually felt my eyes go heavy and sleep enfold me slowly. I tried to open my eyes, I just wanted to tell Jungkook something but sleep was already embracing me.

" I'm sorry. " I said before I fell asleep to Jungkook stroking my hair.

" You should not be sorry. I love you my princess. " Jungkook said before he kissed my forehead falling asleep right after me.

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I hope you liked this chapter, I'm sorry if it's short or bad. I love you guys and you should know your amazing and beautiful.

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