*Ashton's POV*

I woke up and there was light pouring into my room. I groaned, because I seriously don't want to get up. I hate the day. I'm more of a night person. if you didn't know already. Most of my energy flows through me late at night.

I didn't have any source to tell time, because I never remember to steal a clock and I've no idea where my phone is.

Even though I have a phone it's pretty much useless. My mom canceled my number the day I got kicked out. I can only use my phone to tell time and mess with apps that I downloaded before, which suck donkey ass.

I should use it to keep a list of things to steal, like a fucking clock, a TV, and some Nesquik. I want chocolate milk.

I forced myself out of the bed and I trudged to the bathroom, stretching my arms and running my fingers through my messy hair. When I got to the bathroom I stared at myself in the mirror.

God, I look like absolute shit.

I turned on the faucet water, wet my hands, and began fixing my hair. Then I splashed the cold water onto my face.

During the time I was cleaning myself up I heard some sort of vibrating coming from outside of the bathroom. I shut off the water and carded my hair one last time before leaving. I followed the vibrations and they were coming from my room. I came across a pair of shorts on the ground and I put my hand on top of it, feeling the vibrating. I checked the pockets and found my phone. It had started vibrating from the alarm that I had set.

Thank you, me, for setting an alarm.

I looked at the time and saw that it was a little bit past seven in the morning. I tossed my phone onto the bed before heading out into the living room to my luggage. I don't know why I don't leave that in my room, it's more convenient that way, but I'm too lazy to move the thing.

It's not that hard to do, but... no, I'll leave it there.

I searched through the luggage, but I noticed that there were no more fresh clothes for me. I really need to call Michael, but I don't have a phone.

Well, better go ask Cynthia if I could use her phone.

I know about her crush on me since she makes it pretty obvious, and I don't mind. I'm pretty damn sexy. Who wouldn't fall for Ashton Irwin? If I were a girl I'd want to be banged by me as well. Plus, I'm not going to use the phone that's down in the lobby. I have to pay, and Ashton Irwin doesn't pay for any kind of shit.

Well, maybe some junk at the 7-Eleven, but that's about it.

Since I pretty much have Cynthia wrapped around my finger, she'd do anything for me. When I asked if I could borrow some cash she didn't hesitate to rush off to the safe and hand me hundreds of dollars. I didn't even need the money, so I told her to take it back. I just wanted to see how far she was willing to go before she decided to say no to me.

Besides, I get money by stealing, not from asking. It's more fun that way, and I like it.

Returning to my little clothes issue, since I don't have anything to wear other than the boxers that are clinging to my shorts... I guess anyone who comes across me are lucky enough to see me half naked.

I found my apartment keys on the table and grabbed them. Then I began making my way to Cynthia's apartment. She and the landlord, who is her dad, live on the first floor. I'm on the third floor, so I need to take the stairs. There's no elevator, and that's not a good thing. If I could steal an elevator and put it here in this building, then I'd do that.

On my way to the first floor I came across an older woman, a nerdy looking guy, and a little boy. The older woman blushed before scurrying off, the nerdy guy was comparing himself to me, and the little boy asked why I wasn't dressed.

"Because I'm proud of my body," I told him. "I want everyone to see the beauty of me." With that I walked off.

I wonder if in the near future the kid would start walking around naked. It'd all be thanks to me.

I got to the first floor and went to the owner's apartment. I knocked on the door and just swung on my feet. Once the door flew open it revealed Cynthia and she was starting to turn red at the sight of me.

"Wh-Why are you h-here like that?" she asked, panic evident in her voice.

"I need to borrow your phone," I said, sticking my hand out. I looked into her apartment, trying to search for her dad. "Where's your old bean at?"

"H-He's in the lobby... Do you, uh, w-want to come in?" I just shrugged and walked in. She closed the door and I sat down on the couch. "I'll go g-get my phone now."

"All right." As quickly as she could, she ran off to her room. I took in the place, and then my eyes landed on a digital watch that was sitting on the table. It's most likely her dad's no doubt. I picked it off of the table and slipped it on, making sure it held tight around my wrist.

Now I can tell time without taking my mostly useless phone.

Cynthia came back into the room, thrusting her phone at me without giving me eye contact.

"Here!" she squeaked. I took the phone from her and she took a seat farthest away from me on the couch. I just shrugged and I began dialing Michael's number. When I pressed the call button I noticed that his number was saved into her phone. I found it funny, because these two don't even hang out.

After a couple of rings, Michael finally picked up.

"No, I don't know his penis size!" he yelled.

I laughed, glancing at Cynthia before asking, "What? Why would I want to know my own size?" I saw her starting to flush red.

"Oh. Hey. I thought you were that girl again."

"No, it's just me. Anyway, I need you to come pick me up. It's time for me to do laundry."

"All right, I'm coming over right now. Later."

"Okay, see ya later, man." I hung up the phone and handed it back to Cynthia. "Thanks for letting me use your phone, Cee."

"You're w-welcome," she breathed, her eyes obviously staring at my shorts. What a dirty girl.

"You can look, but you can't touch. Unless you really want to, and I know you do since you asked my friend about my penis size." I winked at her and if she wasn't the reddest her face could be, she was now. I slipped my thumbs into the hem of my boxers and began very slowly slipping it down.

Cynthia jumped onto her feet, becoming all flustered by my little tease. "D-Do you want some breakfast, Irvin? I-I made some bacon and eggs."

"Oh, that'd be nice." I stood up from the couch and began making my way to her kitchen. I took a seat at the table and I watched as she went over to where the food was. She pulled a plate from a cabinet and began filling it up with the breakfast.

It's cruel for me to take advantage of her crush, but I don't care. I don't care about a lot of people, and she's just one of them. I only care about myself, Michael, and maybe the Luke kid. Maaaaaaybe.

I noticed that Cynthia was watching me as I ate the breakfast like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Sometimes whenever I come by to borrow her phone she'd find an excuse to ask me to stay longer, and every time I say yes, because I like to watch her getting all nervous around me, being in crush mode when it comes to me.

I had to eat quickly, because Michael was coming by to pick me up, and I needed to get all my clothes together so that way he and I can leave right away to his place. Maybe I can get Michael to buy me some stuff. He knows how I have barely any money on me, so he buys me stuff. Like I said before, he spoils me, but he doesn't seem to mind the least bit at all.

Once I finished breakfast I pushed the plate away from me and stood onto my feet.

"Thanks for the food, Cee," I said. "Now I must be on my way."

"O-Okay," she replied, sounding a bit disappointed that it was already time for me to leave. I walked towards the door, but she ran ahead of me just to open the door for me. Aw, what a sweet, dirty girl.

"By the way, if you wanted my penis size, all you had to do was ask." I brought my lips close to her ear and began whispering seductively, "I'm quite big, just so you know."

I pulled away and was very pleased with the reaction I got out of her. Her eyes were staring down either at the floor or my shorts.

"Bye, Irvin," she breathed out. I gave her a wave before finally departing.

I wasn't surprised that she didn't even notice that I took her dad's wrist watch. She was too busy admiring my little friend to even notice the rest of me. I wonder how long it'll be until either one of them notices its disappearance.

I didn't encounter anyone on my way back to my room, unfortunately for me. I wanted to mess with a few people.

I got into my apartment and tossed the keys onto the couch. They landed right on top of my backpack and I headed for my room. I used my foot to push all of my dirty clothes into one pile in the middle of the room. Now I just need to wait for Michael to come by.

As if on cue, the sound of someone knocking at my door was heard. I walked over to the front door and opened it up, revealing Michael holding a laundry basket.

"Perfect timing," I told him. "I just finished."

"Yeah," he curtly replied and I frowned. "Your girlfriend keeps bugging me about you. She wants to know everything little thing, from your favorite color to what your favorite sex position is."

"I prefer missionary. You can tell her that."

"I didn't have to know anything." I laughed and he began making his way to my room.

Michael knows about my fake name, Irvin Nothsa. He asked one time why I told everyone that was my name, and I told him it was for private reasons, and he just nodded, never bringing it up again.

Ever since then, the only time he called me Ashton or Ash was when he knew for a certain that no one else was listening into the conversation.

"Dude, put on some clothes," he demanded, but I frowned.

"Why do you think I called you here, numb nuts?" I snapped back. "I have no more."

"Okay, whatever. I guess that means you'll have to wait here until I come back then." Once he got all of my clothes into the basket he began carrying them out and I was following him. "Hey, have you found a job yet?"

"Nah, not yet. I'm still searching."

What a lie. I've no intention on looking for a job. Stealing is all I need. It is my life.

"All right. Well, I'll be going now. Expect me to be back in about three hours, okay?" Then we said bye to one another and I went to my room, picked up my phone, and went back out to the living room to sit on the couch. I kicked my feet onto the table and began looking through the apps on my phone.

I guess I'll just play some games for three hours. I feel like playing Temple Run. But first, I need to make that list. I opened up the Notes app and began typing a list under the word 'Free'.

"TV," I mumbled to myself, "clock, Nesquik, money..." Then I made another list labeled 'Pay'. "Lighter, junk food, beer..."

How Luke has the effect to make me want to pay for things I could easily steal is something beyond my knowledge. It's just something about him that makes me not want to steal from him.

Maybe it's because he's super hot and I can't steal from a hot guy? No, I've stolen from hot guys before. This is Luke I'm talking about.

Oh, well. I'll figure it out eventually.