Coughing echos in the air as the night sky paints over the daylight with stars that twinkle dimly. Keaton groans as the crying only gets louder the longer we both try to ignore the cries. "Harry-" Keaton says rolling over into my chest as Lilah gets more and more upset. Her coughing getting more and more intense.

"Okay, Lilah... okay..." I say groaning as Keaton blinks her eyes open watching me get up.

"Harry she doesn't sound very good..." her voice is raspy and low as I swig my legs over the bed running my fingers through my hair. My body begged for a few more seconds of sleep as I stood up and walked
over to the corner where the crying was coming from.

"Okay Lilah, hey, what's going on baby? What's going on with you?" I pick her up and listen to her liquid cough as she grips onto my skin for dear life. I pat her back and rock her as she cries into my shoulder. I sit down on the edge of the bed and grab her bottle shaking it before guiding it to her rose petal lips.

She sucks momentarily before choking and coughing, alert and anxiety surging through my veins I immediately sit her up and pat her back as she spits up and begins to sob and wail violently.

"What's going on Lulu?" I ask her as she begins to kick her little legs with agitation. She coughs furiously as I pat her back softly.

"Babe... I don't think she's okay, here hand her to me," Keaton sits up in the bed rubbing her eyes as I hand her the baby and switch the bedside lamp on. "Oh my god Harry, she's burning up," Keaton notes as she touches her head and feels for a temperature. "We need to cool her down,"

"I'll go run a bath," I say rushing up to get to the bathroom where I run the water and wait for it to come to a lukewarm temperature in the sink. My palms sweat and shake as I swear incoherently as I look in the mirror catching bloodshot eyes and tired-looking skin.

I listen to the soundtrack of coughs take over as Keaton tries to take control of the situation. I can hear her patting Lilah's back and mustering up comforting words.

"Are you sick baby? Hmmm?" She hums against whines and coughs that echo in the silence of the bedroom. Nerves prick at my skin as I rub my eyes and again feel the water temperature with my cracked hands.

"Darling don't you weep... there's a place for me, somewhere we can sleep, see you in your dreams," I hear a soft lullaby float through the tension of the situation. I step over to peak into the bedroom where Keaton undresses Lilah and tries what she can to calm her down. Settling her cries and worries as she looks at her with weathered eyes and a soft velvety voice. The song felt so familiar. How did I know it?

"Ever since a little girl, I found it sweet
Driving past a graveyard on a lonesome street
All the little flowers gave me something to believe in," Keaton sings lifting up the naked baby and bringing her up towards her chest where she rubs her back and stands from the bed. I stumble back, taking the position back into the bathroom where the water runs and fills the sink with crystal water that touches the yellow lighting in the apartment.

Kea saunters into the bathroom where I'm met with her song. Her body sways as she quiets the crying that turns into whines of discomfort. Lilah's breathing is wheezy and quick as Kea continues to run her back and place her in the water-filled sink and eventually will be too big to cradle the growing body of a baby.

"Never know the feeling of a stable home
Been a couple years of living on the road
Couldn't really tell you where they'd leave a stone," she hums as I come up behind her and scoop her up from her waist. Kea lays Lulu into the sink where she blinks and draws her attention to the loud blue wallpaper that paints pictures of animals and flowers that tangle into each other. It wasn't ever my choice but it came with the apartment and I never disliked it enough to take it down.

"I'm scared, Kea..." I tell her with shakey confidence that falls to the floor as soon as she glances at me through the mirror. Her dark eyes soothe my anxiety for a few moments before she twirls around to face me and caress my face.

"I know but we have to stay calm for her okay?" She tells me humming the same melody as Lulu began to stir again. "We have to keep her calm, I'm going to go pack a bag and get the car ready. We need to take her to the hospital-"

"Oh god, Kea I-"

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Shhhhhhhh... It's going to be okay. Just keep her calm okay?" She says as I look down at the baby who is wheezing through quick breaths. Keaton breaks away from me as I then cup the water and pour it over Lilah's head to cool her down from the high temp that was burning through her.

"Look at you pretty girl," I breathe listening to her panting and swallowing as much air as she can with each fast breath she pulled in. Her stomach frantically moved up and down as she panted. Her brows furrowed as she coughs once again a sun begins to cry once again. "Hey, hey, hey, come on Lilah,"

"Come on baby," I say brushing warm water up onto her chest as she begins to start a full crying fit. Anxiety sparks once again as she screams and coughs once again grasping onto any oxygen she can bring in.

"Kea!" I call out as I push her baby hair out of her face to feel her hot forehead. She sniffles and thrashes around, her little toes separating as she tries to outstretch. "Keaton!"

"Try singing to her, stay calm! She can feel you stressing out," Keaton calls from the bedroom. My breathing picks up and I feel as though I could pass out from the nerve pricking my skin.

"I can't-"

"Yes you can Harry, I've got this," Keaton says peeking her head into the bathroom to see my string out and anxious self sweat while I pushed my hair back and tries to breathe.

"I can't do it, she needs you," I saw as Keaton goes back to packing in the bedroom while Lilah sobs and begins coughing profusely.

"No, she needs you, Harry. You are her dad and she wants you," Keaton tells me through the crying and barrier of the rooms.

I push out a breath and shake the anxiousness as Lilah lifts her arms up for me. I pick up her naked body and feel the wetness against my bare chest where she resides. I sway back and forth as she continues to scream and nuzzles into my skin where she tries to find comfort. I slid down the bathroom wall holding Lilah close to me as continued to wail and scream, I hold back my emotions that were banging at the door in the back of my mind. The flood of tears and the vicious storm of anxiety thrashed around in my body.

I hold the back of Lilah's head and move my thumb over her wet and tangled hair. Tucking my chin and closing my eyes I begin to remember the song Kea was singing along to. I knew the song well but somehow can't remind why or how.

"Darling don't you weep...
There's a place for me, somewhere we can sleep
See you in your dreams, darling don't you cry," I rub her back and feel hot tears fall through the cracks of my eyes while I continue the familiar lullaby that Keaton had so effortlessly sang. Nostalgia washes over me as I sing the words weakly.

"Head fast towards the light
Foolish men have tried but only you have shown me how to love bein' alive," she sings as we lie under the makeshift night sky. The fort stood sloppily in the middle of the living room as she looked up at the white fairy lights that reside above us as her eyes lit up at the sight of them. She cuddled into me as she softly sings her song oh so softly to me.

"Until it's time to see the light I'll make my own with you each night,
I'll kidnap all the stars and I will keep them in your eyes," She sings nuzzling into me as I tighten my arm around her. I look over and see a smile on her soft pink swollen lips. She closes her eyes and yawns humming as I lay with her until she lulls the both of us to sleep with her sweet and gentle voice.

Her cries turn to whimpers as I open my eyes and feel Lilah's body calm down. Her restlessness settles in the wake of the early morning. I sniffle finishing the line of the song I knew well. "I'll wrap them up in velvet twine, and hang them from a fishing line so I can see them anytime I'd like," my voice cracks as I hear the echo of a memory in my mind. It was safe there.

•

"How old did you say Lilah was?" A nurse asks me as I sit slumped over in a waiting room chair while Keaton rubbed my back and tried to comfort me. I sit up immediately when I hear her name.

"I-I-I- umm," I try to think hard about the questions I was being asked but I couldn't come up with an answer to the simple questions. "I don't remember.."

"Hey it's okay, don't stress yourself out. Just take a deep breath," the nurse says in a gentle way sitting down next to me on the other side. "First-time parents?"

"No- I mean, it's um," I try again but spill too much emotion as my eyes again begin to water. The tears burn my eyes but I quickly wipe them away.

"Yes," Keaton answers for me. Knowing that I was struggling to make a coherent sentence or thought.

"Do you mind us pulling your records so we can get a better idea of Lilah's health history?" The woman with a warm demeanor asks glancing at Keaton. "Prenatal records could really help-"

"I'm not her mom," Keaton swallows looking insecure as the nurse that reminded me very much of Anita. She had the same kind and warm eyes, her presence made you feel at home as she sat patiently.

"Alright that's okay, do we have the mother's records possibly?"

"Is she going to be okay? I didn't mean to get her sick I-I-I-" I start but cannot finish before the nurse with light brown hair strung up in a ponytail put a hand on my leg.

"Hey, this wasn't your fault okay? Hey look at me," she says as I glance up with swollen bloodshot eyes. I looked like a wreck in this lobby as a nurse and Keaton tried their best to hold me together. "I need you to say it. This isn't your fault,"

"This isn't my fault," I repeat weakly back to her as she instructed. Her hands were freshly manicured as she squeezed my knee to comfort my fears.

"And don't you forget it, none of this was something you could have prevented," she says to me as I sit up once again from my bent-over posture.

"Can I see her? What's going on? Is she going to be okay?" I ask in a frantic and shaky tone. My voice cracks and breaks multiple times as the woman's kind blue eyes keep close watch over me and fill with empathy.

"I'm not supposed to say much because we are still running tests but she's going to be okay. She's safe with us, alright?" I could smell the scent of latex gloves and iodine solution touch my nose as phones rang incessantly through the lobby.

"I just want to see her, when can I see her?" I ask.

"Soon, the doctor is just finishing up a few diagnostic tests but the mother's medical records would speed up the process if we had them," the nurse says keeping a firm comforting hand on my knee as I blink a few times before choking out her name.

"Penelope Scott, her name is Penelope Scott."

"Thank you, you've helped more than you can imagine, okay?" The woman's honey brown hair falls over her shoulder and she pats my knee and quickly scribbles down her name. "Do we need to phone Penelope before we access her records? Or do we have her consent?"

"She's dead," I say with a deadpanned expression and no emotion left in my wobbly voice.

"I'm so sorry for your loss, I'm going to go give this to the doctor now. I will come and grab you as soon as little Lilah can have visitors." The nurse informs us turning on her heel as Keaton thanks her for her help.

"Harry I think we should call someone, your dad maybe?" Keaton suggests but I shit down the idea as soon as I navigate where it was going.

"Absolutely fucking not!" I say firmly shaking my head.

"You know I wouldn't even suggest it if it wasn't an emergency. You can't handle this all on your own, maybe Gemma could come down and help or-"

"I fucking said no! I don't feel the need to repeat myself again," I bite bitterly feeling her hand slide away from me. She uncrosses her legs and stands up to excuse herself.

"Maybe I should go." She says as I try to grab her hand. "Obviously you aren't in the mood for company and I've outstayed my welcome."

"Kea, don't do this!" I say frustrated as she swipes her hand away from me, hurt by my tone of voice and snippy nature.

"Do what? Try to help? Try to comfort you? Or god forbid care for you and the baby?! Fuck, Harry, I've tried to be patient!" She exploded as I stand up and look her in the eyes. I can see the glassiness in her eyes glaze over above her flushed red cheeks.

"Can we not do this right now? Look I'm sorry," I try knowing that it came over more bitter than sincere.

"I stand by what I said. Obviously, I'm not the person you need right now. I would suggest calling Gemma or even Niall I don't care who it is at this point," I try to grab her again but she pushed me away with anger in her gestures. I didn't want her to go. Then again why were my words so contrary to my thoughts?

"Harry?" A voice sounded off in the distance as I look away and behind Keaton. A platinum blonde woman jogs over to me coming into focus. It was Caroline.

"Perfect timing, I'll talk to you later," Keaton says as I try to grab for her hand one last time. She pulls away and leaves me alone, Caroline wraps her arms around my neck and takes me in with a pearly white smile.

"What are you doing here?" Caroline asks me as the figure of Keaton becomes hazy and unfocused. My mind told me to run after her but my feet stood planted on the unpolished and scuffed white tile.

"I um..." I stood with noise buzzing in my ears, I blink violently to attempt to regain my attention that drifted away with Keaton.

"Harry, are you okay? You don't look so good," Caroline furrowed her brow releasing her hold on me and backing away to analyze the signs of exhaustion that culminated in my presence.

"I'm okay, I'm just tired is all. What are you doing here?" I ask with very poor performance that wasn't convincing in the least. I can see the wheel physically turning in Care's head as she tried to piece together what was going on.

"It's embarrassing honestly, Dalton and I were up making a midnight snack and I cut my finger pretty good," She tells me removing her eye contact as she tucks her head to look down at the floor. "You know me I've always been a bit of a clutz,"

"There you are, I should have guessed where you ran off to," Dalton appears from behind Caroline and takes one look at me with discomfort.

"Dalton, look who I ran into!" Caroline smiled at me still analyzing my bloodshot eyes and sluggish posture that I couldn't help but sustain. "When I was walking out I saw him and Keaton was it?"

"Yeah, she just stepped out for a minute. I should probably catch up with her since we were just leaving anyway," I pretend as I go trying to rack my brain for any excuse as to why we were here. Why were we here at 3 am in the morning? I had to come up with something quick.

"Keaton and Harry have liked each other since diapers I could've sworn they would have made it official by now!" Care says sweetly leaning into Dalton's arms as he slides his hands up and down the sides of her sleeveless arms. "Wait, you never said what you were doing here?"

"Well, actually we were" I start but get cut off when I hear my name come from a nurse. The voice was familiar. It came from the light-haired woman we were talking with a little bit ago. She comes over to the half-circle we had made with our bodies.

"Harry, the doctor would like to talk with you now and go over her results," The warm woman says closing the circle as stress etches on my expression. "Oh... I will give you all a moment," The nurse says seeing a concerned Caroline.

"Harry? You know you can always talk to me. What's happening?" Care asks once again with knitted brows as she reaches for my hands that were worn and tired. I look down and sigh out unsure of where I can go. I was backed up against a wall and I didn't know what to say to her.

"Care, I- I can't," I muster up knowing that was hardly enough to explain what needed to be said. My heart rate picks up as Caroline whispers something to Dalton promptly causing him to nod and walk away. He pats my shoulder in passing before Care gives me a serious expression.

"I'm not going to leave until you tell me what's going on. Whose results are they talking about? We have always been close Harry and nothing has changed, let me be here for you. Are you in trouble?" Caroline asks as my body shakes, I run my hands through my hair and blow out a breath as look up at the ceiling pleading to be taken away.

"Care I just, I'm not ready for this. I'm fucking scared out of my mind..."

"Harry you are scaring me," Caroline tells me with her eyes concentrated on me, woven with concern as she reaches for my hand in an attempt to comfort me.

"No one can know,"

"Know what? Harry, please explain to me what's happening! Where did Keaton go? Is it something to do with her? She seemed really upset before I came over," I was afraid she had seen that. My breathing picks up and I can feel my emotions escalate at an uncomfortable rate as I avoid eye contact with Caroline.

"Mr. Styles? Are you okay?" Our nurse asks seeing the state I was in at the current moment.

"I feel like I am having a heart attack, I can't breathe," I say to the two women that looked concerned and scared just watching me as I backed up and tried to catch my breath.

"Harry, hey, listen to me," The nurse starts in grabbing my arms and guiding me to a chair to sit down. "Breathe with me okay? You are having a panic attack, we need to breathe," I am instructed to put my head down between my knees and close my eyes. I pant and try to match my breathing pattern with the nurses but struggle to do so.

"That's it, just try to relax. Breathe in... hold... and let it go," She prompts as I follow behind her instructions. Clearing my mind of anything else but breathing, it's all I could have done to prevent collapsing right there from the fear of my heart giving out and spasming.

Note: ahhhh I hope you enjoyed the longer chapter! Things are about to pick up as you can see:) any thoughts? Predictions maybe?