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Chapter 66: Nerves and Airplanes

Mkhulu leaving put a damper on the mood. It brightened back up from the funny performances that came after.

Lime’s charming smile is still kept in place as he introduces more and more people.

Dominique orders more food, a lot more. Waiters come by our table, placing white plates filled with food. There's barely space on the table now.

Olivia raises her brows, watching the amount of food the waiters keep bringing to our table.

“Which stomach are you putting all that food in?” Olivia asks.

Dominique laughs, a smug look on his face. “I'm eating for two.”

Olivia's eyes stray to mine, the smile in her eyes. “Two meaning?”

“I'll eat all that Mkhulu should've eaten and mine.”

“So you're killing yourself with food.” I add and he laughs, like it's nothing.

Dominique stuffs more food into his mouth. He takes a bite from a burger on the left plate, the sauce dripping down his chin. Then he takes a bite from the pizza from the second plate to the left, then he nibbles on the nuggets in the other plates.

Olivia and I struggle to keep all the plates on the table, making sure none of them crash to the floor. For a moment we just stare at Dominique, completely baffled with his behaviour.

Dominique feels our stare and with his mouth full, chewing on his food, he sighs. Dominique takes a long gulp of the water he ordered, the only thing that isn't a health risk.

“Okay fine…. I admit it. ” Dominique raises his hands in defeat. “ I'm nervous. I'm nervous like a jiggling chimpanzee in a zoo.”

Olivia and I chuckle.

Dominique's turn to perform is coming up soon but it didn't explain his behaviour.

“What does that have to do with   eating like you'll never see food again?” I ask him.

“I eat when I'm nervous. It's  science. You don't overthink, your heart doesn't race, you're simply eating. You should try it.”

Olivia's facial expression is thoughtful and amused. “I don't think that's healthy.”

“I take life science Olivia, so I think I know a thing or two about health and science.”

She lifts her hands in mock surrender.

“Sure,” I begin speaking, “but do you know a thing or two about common sen—”

“Dominique!!”

The three of us turn to the stage, our attention stolen by Lime's voice calling out someone from the table.

The crowd applauds, everyone waiting to see who will stand up so they know who Dominique is.

Dominique’s wide eyed, frozen. He takes three large  aggressive bites of his burger, before he stands up, chewing really quickly.

He gets on stage. Lime hands Dominique the mic.

Dominique accepts it and when he's alone on stage he's still chewing. I'm not surprised with the bites he took.

This makes everyone laugh, smiles adorning people's faces. Dominique’s green eyes sparkle, his confidence and comfort found surrounded by the sound of laughter and in the space of joy.

“Okay I'm done,” he says when he's done chewing.

Olivia and I laugh, sharing a look and then we look away.

I reach from underneath the table and hold her hand, entwining our fingers.
She smiles, a secret smile.

The music begins, the melody annoyingly familiar.

Dominique smiles, his green eyes alight. “ This song is called Night Air —”

“Oh dear, “ I mutter, “someone cut my ears off till they bleed.”

Olivia chuckles, raising her brows at my sentiments.“Long story?”

“Sort of.” I reply, “but basically I know this song off by heart, sung backwards and sung vertically. That's how much he's been listening to it.”

She laughs.

We turn our attention back to Dominique's performance. He smiles and laughs through some of the lyrics. He's carefree but manages to gauge the crowd.

Dominique's up on stage, the lyrics showing behind him on the screen but he still continues to sing the wrong words. He has his fun on stage.

If there's anything I've learned on this night is that karaoke is this; singing your favourite lines with the lyrics wrong in  horrible pitch while strangers cheer.

It's stupid, off-tune fun.

❄️❄️❄️

Unlike the last time, I'm not going up on stage. Dominique tries to convince me, telling me it's a once in a lifetime opportunity but I'd rather skip that opportunity and that's what I tell him.

The truth is, the only reason I came to this place the first time was to see Olivia sing. That's all.

And I think I'll save my singing for the shower, the car and God—he knows how he blessed my vocal cords with weird cracks.

The food on our table is mostly cleared up, except for Dominique's abundant food which is packed away for later.

Lime gets up on stage, as the next person leaves, the sound of the applause drowning out everything else.

“Well that…was interesting.” He says into the mic. “ I know who I'm not inviting to sing at my wedding.” He laughs at his own joke.

“Well ladies and gentlemen. We've reached the end of our karaoke night. I hope you've enjoyed the food,the music or at least the lights. See some of you tomorrow night, a few of you on another night and the rest of you, never again.”

People slowly begin getting up their seats, conversations picked up. Some are already leaving the dining area while a few linger, waiting.

“I'm confused.” Dominique says, looking straight at Olivia. “ Weren't you supposed to go up there? What was the whole point of this?”

Olivia chuckles, her brown eyes straying to mine then flicking away. “ I still am. I'm the closing act.”

“The show ended.” Dominique says, matter of factly, gesturing to a few people who are leaving, walking past our table.

“ The closing act is an alternative for wannabe artists. Basically after the show while people leave you go up there and sing. With no introduction, no applause. You just sing and those who stay, stay, those who hear, hear and those who leave…they leave.”

Before Olivia can say anymore, Lime is  walking towards us. He's made it to our table, taller up close. He hands Olivia the mic, smiling. “ End the night off, young lady.”

Olivia smiles, her nerves making it waver but she exhales, taking hold of courage. Lime  walks off.

Olivia looks at me. “I'm doing this.” She says softly, talking more to herself than she is to me.

“You're doing this.” I confirm, reaching from underneath the table to give her hand a gentle squeeze. She squeezes back her touch lingering for a moment until she's up, leaving the table.

It's an honour, a privilege, a hidden joy to be witnessing Olivia take a step, even if it's the smallest to one of her dreams. It means so much  because I know she's wanted this for a long time, it was one the first things she shared with me.

When Olivia is on stage, there's as many spotlights except for a small, faded blue spotlight. The screen at the back is black, not showing any lyrics.

I think it's perfect, the simplicity of it.

There's only a few people left on the tables, some of them lost in deep conversations, others staring at their phones. There's still people who are leaving.

Olivia clears her throat into the mic. She stands there, the white flower in her hair looking like it's blooming all over again.  “This is a song I wrote about hope.”

Olivia breathes, her eyes fluttering shut, when her eyes open, they're warmer, confident.

Olivia's voice is like oil  poured out, like an instrument of her own. She sings into the mic, the background music plays a wonderful melody that makes it feel like you're floating. Her voice floats beautifully over the music, twisting into painful yet hopeful lyrics.

I've never loved a song more. She smiles through the song but there's pain in her eyes. It's the type of pain poured out through song and as she  sings, her soul and voice entwining to say one thing, it's like I —it's like we can see her healing.

A few people who left, walk back in the place, taking a seat anywhere they find so they can hear her sing. I watch all this. Dominique holds up his phone, worldless as he takes the video of Olivia up there on stage.

Those who had their faces faced downwards on their phone, put their phone away and  stare. They listen to Olivia's beautiful melodies.

It's simply beautiful, like everything about her. And as I watch the world, watching her, their attention captured by her, I remember her words.

Olivia was right. She didn't fit into any of the boxes in highschool. They were too small or  weirdly shaped or the labels were completely off. She was bigger than a box.

A boundless, wonderful beauty.

❄️❄️❄️

Dominique waves goodbye even as I drive off, watching for the road in the dark. Olivia's silent beside me, but the smile on her face remains, mirroring the one on my face.

The silence fills the car, comfortable. I drive her home, purposefully taking the long way back. She sees that and says nothing.

Something flashes in the sky, the lights red and yellow. It's nothing like the stars but it's nothing less glorious. It flies across the dark, star filled sky, a lot smaller than usual like it's calling for my attention.

I stop the car, pulling up  by the side of the pavement. Olivia stares back at me. “This is not  where I live. Have you forgotten?”

“ Can we step out for a moment, Olivia?”

Her gaze is questioning. She sighs, opening the car door along with me.

The cold wind is shocking, chillier than before but it's not what steals my breath away. It's the sign in the sky.

The flying miracle, the airplane.

I feel Olivia's gaze on me, from the other side of the car. “ No, not me Olive bean. Look up.”

She looks up. Her eyes search the sky, it's not long before she sees the white airplane.

She doesn't seem  to see all of it at first, looking closely. I climb up the car, pulling myself up, until I'm seated on the roof. Olivia stares at me, surprised.

I hold out my hand to her, she hesitates until she takes my hand, clasping it around hers. I pull her up, Olivia lands half in my arms, we pull away, laughing.

She sits beside me on the roof of the car, and we stare up at the sky.

The airplane is still, like it stopped just for us, just for me to see the sign.

“Can you see what's written on the banner?”

Olivia squints her eyes, her lips pulled to a frown. A few seconds pass and then she looks back at me, having seen the words on the banner.

In  a gold, yellow colour, with large print, a neon lit banner is on the airplane  with the sign — Dream again.

Olivia and I don't say much, we simply stare up at the sky, the stars, the airplane and the sign.

“That's gonna be me up there…” I break the silence, turning to look at her. “One day it's gonna be me, flying an airplane just like that,  with signs that give people hope.”

Olivia doesn't say anything after that, she simply stares, like she sees it too, like she believes in me.

“ You were amazing up there, singing.” I tell her, even though it's the fiftieth time I'm saying this.

Olivia smiles, her eyes straying away until they come back to me, warmer.

“Thank you. It was a little dream come true…scary but a dream nonetheless.”

“You've inspired me.”

“Really?” Her tone is  incredulous.

“Yes. I want that to be our lives, chasing and living out dreams together.”

“...”

“Tell me more Olivia.”

“More of what?”

“ Your dreams.”

And she does, she explains, unravels the world she wants to see for herself, for others. We sit there on the roof of a car , underneath the stars, talking, sharing and hoping.

“Question 30” Olivia says, mid through a conversation.

“Go.”

She pulls out her phone from her dress pocket, and then she reads it. “When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

We both share a look with each other,charged. “We both.. cried in each other's arms yesterday but besides that it was with Mkhulu a few weeks ago.”  ( The time when I foolishly gave up on her and I told Mkhulu about it.)

“By myself it was a few days ago while I was praying to God.

She nods.

“I'm a cry baby,” she says with a laugh. “So crying is basically a hobby and I always cry when I pray. Not when I pray but when I pray-pray.” She looks at me, a question in her eyes, wondering if I get it.

I smile, nodding.

“I actually cried in front of a good friend of mine last year when life was just a mess and I was overwhelmed. And by myself it was also yesterday, while I heard you reciting the poem.”

She doesn't look at me when she says the last part, I don't add anything onto what she's revealed. Everything's been said, the silence is okay.

“Question 31.” I mutter, “we're literally almost there.”

“Yeah. It's like a few days ago we were nowhere but now…we're reaching the end.” And I see the question in her eyes, what happens after the end.

“Tell your partner something that you like about them already.”

Olivia's eyes flit over my face, searching. “Your character, everything that makes up you. Your faith, your hope, your dreams, your voice, your opinions. I love that.”

I'm flushed, losing train of thought for a moment, lost in her eyes but also at the same time found. I'm taken back to that fateful Karaoke night; the first time Olivia and I had a fight. The way she said my name, like she didn't know me, like she saw me as the world saw me but now…

I see that was a lie, that was a truth she picked up from what everyone saw. Just like how I saw and know, how other people see Olivia; like there's nothing much to see.

Olivia's eyes sparkle with the pride of knowledge. She knows me, and I never thought my heart had needed to be known like it is now.

“I love your heart Olivia, your soul. It's the things you say and the way you say them. It's your voice, it's your song. It's your eyes and even your tears. It's  those looks you give me and the ones you don't.”

I don't know when we started holding hands but we're holding hands. I'm not sure who reached out first but that doesn't matter. What matters is how we tighten our hold, clinging, caressing and relishing. I bring her hand up to my lips, placing kisses on her knuckles, placing kisses where our fingers meet.

It didn't go past me, how even though the question stated, something that we like, we both used the word love. Intentionally.

We're past like, this is love.


★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

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