Jesse leaned back in her chair, closing her eyes. She reached one hand up, massaging her sore forehead with two fingers. It didn't feel like the day was ever coming to an end, every second feeling like it was taking longer to tick by than the previous one.

Groaning softly, Jesse tossed her pen aside and let the upper half of her body flop down on the desk, resting her her head on the paperwork that she'd barely worked on.

She clenched her hands into tight fists, frustration boiling inside of her. She just wanted to get home, slump down on her bed and sleep. But no, that wasn't going to happen, she already knew that.

Sleep only came when it wanted to, which wasn't all that often anymore. In fact, she couldn't remember the last time she had slept. Had it been that week? What day was it even?

Jesse sunk back into her chair again, switching back to her former position with her gaze tilted up at the ceiling.

It's been like that all day, her concentration refusing to work along. She's been agitated, slightly short tempered and battling a constant headache. Not one paper of work had been done.

Jesse gritted her teeth, wondering if she should call it a day early. Really, all she was probably going to do was walk home, pace up and down the hallway, and probably break something or start crying.

It's just how her days have been going for... She's lost track of how long.

Her emotions had been all over the place. If she wasn't snapping at people, she was tearing up over something as small as dropping a pen. She's been sleeping and eating less, and working more. It's been weeks since something's made her feel like smiling.

Jesse sighed softly, sitting up in her chair. She rubbed her burning eyes as she stood up, deciding that all staying at the office was going to accomplish - was to make her more moody than she already was.

She looked over at the paper scattered across her desk. She was behind on her work, and barely trying to get back on schedule. It was like she just didn't care anymore.

Jesse sighed, picking up her stuff and heading for the door. She didn't know what she was going to do at the Order Hall once she got there, but that was problem that could wait to be addressed.

Hearing the wooden planks in the hallway creak beneath Jesse's feet, Radar's head was quick to pop out from a different room.

"Boss?" He asked in puzzlement. "Where are you heading? Is everything okay?"

"I'm sorry Radar, I'm going home early today." Jesse said softly. "Just can't really stay concentrated, you know?"

Radar frowned slightly, looking concerned. Usually it would make Jesse chuckle, seeing how easily her intern could get anxious over anything. But that afternoon, not even Radar's nervousness was making her crack a smile.

And maybe her intern's concerns weren't overreaction, for once.

"Boss, Jesse, are you sure everything is alright?" Radar asked her, stepping out of his own office and walking to her side. "You've been... Not quite yourself for a while."

"I'm fine." Jesse said, forcing her mouth to curve upwards slightly to reassure him.

"Okay." Radar said softly, giving in. "Just let me know if you need anything, alright Boss?"

Jesse nodded, turning away. She hesitated slightly, a part of her almost wanting to turn back and hug Radar goodbye. She shook her head to herself, there was no reason to start getting sappy. She'd see him the next day again anyway.

"Bye!" Radar cheerfully called after her as he disappeared back into his own office to finish his section of the day's work.

Jesse stepped outside into the cool afternoon air, pulling her jacket's hood over her head. If a fan ran up to her at that moment, she had a feeling that she would simply push them away. Staying invisible was probably the safer option.

As expected, no Beacontowner realised it was Jesse beneath the hood. They walked past her like she wasn't even there - which was exactly how Jesse preferred it.

Slowly pushing open the door, Jesse stepped into the Order hall. Slamming it shut behind her, without even bothering to lock it. She sighed, pulling back the jacket's hood again, and brushing her hair out of her face.

Staring ahead at the empty house in front of her, Jesse could already feel her emotions start to prickle again. She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to make everything feel just a little bit more comforting.

She didn't even know what she was going to do. Have dinner? Not while she was in that state, it wasn't a mistake she was about to make twice. Go to bed early? She didn't have the guts for more hours of endless tossing and turning. Read a book or watch TV? Maybe, but she probably wouldn't even stay concentrated.

Jesse took in a deep, shaky breath as she prepared herself to walk deeper into her home. To hear her footsteps creak through the empty building, her own breathing echoing back at her from the walls.

The Order Hall had become a place Jesse hated, despite having been her home for so long. Constantly reminding her of all the things she spent her life doing, the moments wasted outweighing the ones well spent.

Everything was a harsh, cold reminder. The five chairs at the dining table, the four empty bedrooms. The unused redstone workshop, the practice dummy that hasn't been fought in years.

Jesse slowly trudged up the stairs and into her bedroom, turning her head away so she wouldn't have to see the doors to the rooms where she knew her friends weren't.

Jesse stopped in her bedroom, staring out if the window at the setting sun. She had a clear view across most of Beacontown, right out of those open gates.

Jesse felt her heartbeat falter as she stared at the gates. Almost every time she slept, she got to relive that moment at least once. That moment where she watched her last friend disappear through those exact gates.

Ever since she said goodbye to Petra, things weren't the same. It was as if the rest of her friendships just... Faded. There were barely any contact left between Beacontown, Redstonia and Boomtown. And as if it wasn't painful enough that she never saw Axel and Olivia, Lukas had also retreated back into the woods to continue writing, never popping in to hear how things are going anymore. And Petra? Jesse hadn't heard a word from her, since the day she left.

Jesse sunk down against the wall, burying her face into her hands. She couldn't continue going on like that. Dug into a permanent hole of heartbreak and depression.

It didn't feel like she had anything left to live for. Her life was wretched, filled with so much pain and grief. What was the point in pushing on anymore?

Jesse rested her head on her knees, feeling tears run down her face. Her body was trembling, tremors dancing throughout her tense muscles. The fresh tears burned her tired eyes, her chest aching with heartbreak.

She was too tired to even think about pushing those emotions down anymore. Worn through, overworked, practically starved and sleep deprived, all feelings that made recovery sound like a distant, unreachable dream.

Jesse's fingers dug into the fabric of her jacket, clinging onto the piece of fabric tightly as she tried to fought the coming storm of emotions.

She didn't think it would truly be the end of their friendships. She had thought they would all truly see each other again. She had hoped and wished with all her hearts that this cold, lonely life wasn't forever.

But after years of wallowing in her own misery while hiding the pain from the rest of the world, Jesse was running out of fight. There was no one left for her to live for. The loneliness was eating her alive.

Jesse shivered, the cooling air starting to become frosty. She sunk further back against the wall, not even feeling like getting some extra warmth. Maybe if she spent the night on the floor, she wouldn't make it to the morning and her suffering would be over.

All I want is to see your faces again. To know that you still think about me too. To know I'm not the only one who's been holding on to hope.

Jesse lifted her head, wiping her eyes on her jacket's sleeve. She stopped, something catching her attention through her fuzzy vision.

Very slowly, Jesse stood up. Taking a few steps forward, staring into the eyes of her own reflection. She hated to see herself weak, broken down and vulnerable. She never spared a second glance at a mirror when she was in tears, the ability to see herself in that state just making things so much harder to tolerate.

But now that Jesse's caught sight of herself, she almost couldn't look away.

Staring back at her, was a face she almost didn't recognise. Her skin was pale, the glow from the slowly rising moon outside making it look almost grey. Her brown eyes were dulled and swollen, glazed over with burning tears. Drying streaks lead down her cheeks, shining in the dim light. Her gaze more broken than she's ever seen anybody.

Jesse balled her hands into tight fists, repulsed by the image in front of her. Her emotions swirling within her as she suddenly launched forward, slamming her fist into the mirror.

Shards scattered across the wooden floor, the shattering crash echoing through the empty house.

Jesse fell to her knees in front of the broken mirror, clutching her hand to her chest. Her knuckles were blossoming with fresh bruises, blood glistening on her skin. Dull throbs radiated up her arm.

A broken sob left Jesse's throat, her voice crackling away as she cried. Opening her eyes to still see her own shattered gaze reflected in one of the broken shards on the ground.

Both emotionally and physically, everything hurt at that moment.

Jesse extended her trembling hand, picking up the shard. She rose to her feet, continuing to stare down in her own eyes. Blood coated the edges of the mirror, painting the hand that was gripping it.

So broken, and barely holding on for what?

Jesse raised to blade, fresh tears streaming down her face as she slowly twisted the deadly object in her hand. It could be over. She could finally just... Let go.

Jesse gulped, lifting her gaze slightly to gaze out of her window at Beacontown one last time. Slowly she lowered the shard, taking a step towards the window. Reaching up to wipe her eyes and clear her vision so she could see.

A figure was moving down the road, heading for the gate. Their step slow and tired looking, but their form still uprighted and strong. Despite the distance between them, Jesse could recognise the bright red hair and blue bandanna.

Jesse flew back from the window, suddenly throwing the piece of glass across the room. Not even blinking as it shattered against the wall. She ripped open her bedroom door, bolting down the stairs and straight out of her front door.

Despite the fact that Jesse's body was drained and exhausted to the maximum, she sprinted down the street at an incredible speed, adrenaline pumping into her legs. Running right at the open gates, towards the approaching figure.

Jesse cried out her friend's name, moments before she crashed right into Petra and sent them both down onto the road.

"Jesse?!" Petra gasped in surprise, her eyes wide as Jesse enveloped her in a large hug. Her arms wrapped around Petra's waist, embracing her tightly there on the ground.

"You're back!" Jesse choked out, her grip tightening as fresh sobs racked her body. "You came back!"

"Yeah, I did." Petra whispered, melting into the embrace and hugging Jesse back tightly.

Completely unaware of the fact that, had she arrived a minute later, her friend might not have been there anymore.

___

Looking at this now, I'm realising that this would probably have fitted great with that "a second too late" prompt. But I wasn't about to wait until whenever I draw that prompt to write this, I'll think of something else when I get to that point!

I'm actually really happy with how this turned out! I had way too much fun with this one, and obviously got completely carried away with it. 

At first, I wasn't planning on giving this one shot a (somewhat) happy ending. It was literally going to end on that line "So broken, and barely holding on for what?"

But when I got the idea of Jesse being ready to end it all, only to see her friend in the distance and suddenly finding will to live again... I couldn't pass up the opportunity!

I also feel like this matches that art piece I did a while back, for the "I don't want to live, but I'm too scared to die" lyrics. With the mirror and all.

It's probably time to write something lighthearted now, to balance out all this darkness xD The depressing one shot streak has just been so much fun!

I've been enjoying this entire challenge an awful lot at that. I had a brief flicker of writer's block today, and almost panicked - after all, we all know how well that went in my last challenge xD But inspiration struck and the block passed. Let's hope I can keep this up!

Also actually posting this on my computer from the comfort of my own bedroom. Being on holiday was great, but I learned my lesson - never do a challenge when you know you're going to be out in wilderness for six days! xD

Enough rambling, holy cow this is getting long.

I hope you all enjoyed this one shot, and I'll see you all again tomorrow with whichever prompt I draw next!