I stood in my living room putting on my earrings, using the full length mirror I have leaning against my wall when I heard a knock at my door. I did not rush to answer it, but when I did, Tom was standing there with a bouquet of flowers in his hand.

"Hey," he said dreamily. He wore a dark blue sweater and a gray blazer with a light blue collar poking out. He handed me the bouquet and I took it delicately.

"It's beautiful." I smelled it and smiled up at him and went in for a friendly hug.

"You look... wow-ee," he chuckled nervously after we pulled apart from our embrace.

I welcomed him in and shut the door behind him. I could feel myself blush, and I was mentally kicking myself. I just hoped that he couldn't see it. He looked so handsome.

"I am almost ready," I said as I walked back to the living room to grab my shoes. They were black heels, but they weren't that tall. I wore a classic little black dress with classy little white pearls around my neck. I was not used to getting this dressed up, especially around Tom. He's seen me at my worst, which seems less embarrassing than this. We've gotten dressed up before for this restaurant so I don't know what made tonight feel so different. I was almost nervous, but he's one of my closest friends. I had no reason to be nervous around him... why was I nervous? Tom has a girlfriend!

Even though he hasn't asked me to, I've found myself waiting for him. I know it'll never be, but I've been bottling that feeling that he gives me and I have shelved it in my mind. It could be there for years. I just have such a love for Tom. I'd tie a lasso around the moon and bring it down for him.

"Our reservation isn't for a bit, so you don't have to rush," he said and checked his watch before his eyes widened at the time. "Or maybe we can aim to get out the door in a few minutes."

I sat on the couch to slip my heels on, and when I stood up I made sure I wasn't going to wobble before I began walking around to grab my other effects. These heels are new, so I haven't had a chance to break them in yet.

"I'll put this in water," I said. I recently washed my vase, so I filled it with water and put the brown and green flowers in the vase and arranged them aesthetically. I set it on my table and smiled at their beauty. I was curious why he picked green and brown, they aren't typical flower colors but they were uniquely beautiful.

I had to head towards Tom to get my coat from the hook next to him, and even in heels he was still taller than me. I lifted my black trench coat off the hook and draped it over my arm.

"Ready to go?" He asked with an instant smile.

His charming smile is contagious. I smiled back and said, "yeah, let's go."

He linked his arm to mine and we walked down the hall after I locked my apartment door. He hilariously took giant steps down the hallway, still linked with me so I had to double my speed to keep up with him, and we were laughing the whole time. We took the elevator, and we kept goofing off all the way to his Mustang.

He drove us across town to my favorite fancy restaurant, Le Tarte Tatin. We have only been here a couple of times before together, but he really likes it too. Only for special occasions do we eat here, or when he's trying to apologize... like tonight. The owner is a chef from France, and they only serve French delicacies. We had to give his car to the car valet and we walked inside.

"We have a reservation, table for two," Tom said to the hostess.

"Last name?" She asked while opening her reservation book.

"Hanson."

The hostess found his name before she picked up a couple of menus and said, "right this way, Mr. and Mrs. Hanson," and began walking to the table.

I raised my eyebrows at being called Mrs. Hanson, and I looked to Tom who looked slightly embarrassed. We brushed it off, and followed her to our table. After she said that our waiter would be with us in just a moment and left, Tom rushed behind me and pulled out my chair.

"Thank you." I sat down and he pushed me closer to the table and took his own seat across from me. The low lighting could be described as romantic, and soft classical music played that could be heard over the white noises of other people talking quietly and enjoying their food. The restaurant was lavishly decorated with beautiful artwork and wood detailing. The linen tablecloth was white and pristine, with silverware placed on the napkins. We had candles on the table with a fresh rose and baby's breath center piece. Everyone was in formal attire, and even the waiters wore suits and bow ties.

"Are you going to get the Steak Diane again?" Tom asked me while taking a peak at his menu.

I nodded but still looked at the menu in case anything else caught my eye. Tom always gets new foods whenever we come here so I asked, "what are you getting this time?"

"I'm thinking of getting the fois gras," he said in a French accent.

"You know that is liver, right?" I chuckled.

Tom's eyes shot up at me and he said in a humorously serious tone, "why would you tell me that?"

I tried to hide my smile, and Tom was clever enough to look away when he felt his emerging. I wonder if he can see what he does to me. He makes me so happy.

The waiter came by with ice water and asked if we were ready to order. I ordered my favorite steak and asked for a Cola to drink. The waiter tried to talk me into ordering a wine that would compliment the steak, but I was firm on my decision of a soft drink, which he definitely judged me for.

"Can I get the fois gras?" Tom asked the waiter, pointing at the menu.

"That's one of my favorites," the waiter said, "might I suggest the 1980 Veuve Clicquot Ponsardin Vintage Brut Champagne? It has a very youthful, pale gold color. It has quite a high, perfumed, estery and exotic nose, with a hint of oxidation and bruised fruit. It pairs superbly with the fois gras."

Tom looked lost at the waiters elaborate review of the sparkling wine. He finally said with a goofy grin, "okey-dokey."

"May I have your identification, sir?" The waiter asked. Tom fumbled with his wallet before handing the waiter his driver's license and he scanned it with his eyes. Determining that the identification was real and he was over the age of 21, he gave it back and asked me for mine. Despite only ordering a soda, I could understand why he would want mine as well, since Tom had ordered a bottle of alcohol. I handed him my drivers license, and he gave it a quick scan before handing it back.

"I'll get those started for you," the waiter said and left. 

I took a sip of my water because my mouth was feeling a little dry. I think it was because I was nervous. Tom did the same, and his rings clanked against the water glass. I teased him about how confused he looked when the waiter was sprouting off about the champagne, and he returned the fire by how there was no way I could understand any more than he could. We talked about Russell Buckins and what he did while he was in California, and before we knew it our food came.

The waiter set my bubbly soda down beside my plate and placed a bucket of ice with the champagne bottle inside on the table. He popped it and poured us both a glass. He said, "enjoy," and left.

I had not eaten much all day because I accidentally skipped lunch, so I was excited to dig into my steak. We were both unnaturally quiet. After a couple of minutes of us eating, I asked Tom, "how's your fois gras?"

"Really good," he said after swallowing. "Want to try it?"

I was hesitant, since I couldn't get it out of my head that it was duck liver. I finally agreed, and he cut off a small piece for me. I tried it, and I was pleasantly surprised. It was rich and buttery, but reminded me of a sausage.

"Wow," I said with a nod and handed him back his fork. "That's very good. Want to try some of my steak?"

He chuckled, "sure."

It has become almost a tradition to try each other's foods whenever we order different things. I've ordered the same thing the few times we have come to this restaurant together, and he has a bite of it every time.

He took a sip of his bubbly champagne after complimenting my dinner choice. A tiny bit of the foam stuck to his upper lip but Tom didn't notice. He asked, "you're not going to want any of this, are you?"

I shook my head. "My Coca-Cola is satisfying me enough."

"This is pretty good," he said and peered at the label on the bottle. "Not even a tongue-dip?"

I snickered, "what the hell is a tongue-dip?"

"You put your tongue in," he said and flicked his tongue in and out of his mouth.

"That's disgusting," I laughed and covered my mouth to be polite. Tom looked down at his plate as he laughed too.

I finally took the full glass of the sparkly pale wine that the waiter poured for me and brought it up to my lips. I decided against the tongue-dip method since the glasses were clear and everyone would be able to see me lick his drink so instead I took a small sip, and my face instantly scrunched. "It's... sour."

"It is wine," he chuckled and took a sip of his own, followed by a small hiccup. "It's supposed to be sour."

I put the glass down and said, "that's not what I was expecting at all."

"What were you expecting?" He asked. He dramatically put his silverware down and said, "don't tell me you were thinking of..."

"... apple cider," I answered in a small voice.

"... apple cider," he said at the same time and laughed. He looked at me in a way that made my heart skip a beat, I had to look away because I could feel my face begin to burn up. "Mick, you never fail to make me laugh."

"Sparkling apple cider," I added with a chuckle and dabbed my lips with my napkin, still looking away from him.

He laughed and shook his head and got back to eating his fois gras. Throughout the meal, he kept looking like he wanted to say something to me, but then he would play it off by taking a sip of his drink and almost hiding behind his glass. It was almost frustrating, because he did not have a reason. I know he doesn't like me the way I liked him, because he has a girlfriend. How could we ever just be friends? I want to imagine us becoming something more than that, which made my heart physically ache but I'd rather him be in my life as a friend than not at all. I will just keep all my emotions bottled up in my chest, and one day I'll die. Problem solved.

After dinner, we shared our favorite dessert, a tarte tartin which is an upside-down pastry with caramelized apples and vanilla ice cream. It's their most popular dish. Tom took care of the check, and when we were getting ready to go he stood behind me and helped me get my coat on. Then, we headed back to his car.

While walking along side each other to the valet, I asked, "remember when you first came to Jump Street and you promised me that you would teach me how to drive a stick?"

He paused for a moment before he said, "yes, I do."

"We only had... what... two lessons?" I stated.

"Want to drive back to your place?" He asked, followed by a small hiccup.

I smiled. "Yes, please."

"Okey-dokey," he said and gave the valet his ticket. The valet soon pulled up in Tom's Mustang and gave him the keys.

Tom turned to me and dangled the keys in my direction and jokingly pulled them out of my reach when I tried to grab them. I tried again, and he still pulled it up too high.

I snickered, "you are such a dope," and I finally snatched them before he could pull them away. He laughed and slung his arm around my shoulders and we walked around to the drivers side. He opened the door for me and I got situated in the seat before he closed the door and walked around to the passengers seat.

I took off my heels and tossed them in the back seat. After we both buckled, he asked, "do you remember how to start a stick?"

It took me a moment, but I remembered to push in the clutch all the way and the break pedal and turned on the engine. Once I heard it start, I relaxed my force on the key and heard it purr.

"Great," Tom said and he wiggled the stick shift for me before putting it into first gear. "Now, just ease up on the clutch and gently push the accelerator."

Remembering this from our few lessons from last year, I tried to ease off the clutch and press the gas, but the car stalled out and we jolted.

"That's all right," Tom said kindly while anxiously rubbing his palms against his knees. "Let's try again."

I turned off the car and turned the key to turn it back on and I tried again. I got the car to roll and we drove out of the parking lot.

"You're going fast enough, so release the gas and push in the clutch all the way and move to second gear. Then, release the clutch and press the gas," he said. I did as he instructed, and went a little faster. To stop at the stop light, I stopped pressing the gas and pushed the clutch in all the way and cruised to a stop.

"Great job," he said confidently.

"I've learned from the best." I grinned.

When the light turned green, I repeated the motions until I got up to fourth gear. Tom said, "you don't even need me."

"I'll always need you," I let escape out of my mouth. I cleared my throat and turned a corner, approaching my apartment complex.

"You took that turn a little wide," Tom commented humorously.

"Yeah..." I agreed.

I was beginning to turn into a parking spot and I felt like I wasn't going into it straight. Tom's car is a lot bigger than mine, and I wasn't used to driving it. I told him, "I think I'm crooked."

"No, you're not," he reassured. I tried to correct the car by turning the wheel but it made it worse. Tom laughed, "well, you weren't until you went that way." And he pointed to the right.

I laughed back and reversed to straighten myself out. Once I confidently parked, I handed him the keys before I had to turn around to my knees and reach to the back seat and grab my shoes. He got out before I did, and we met at the front of his car. I was holding my shoes in my hand and I asked, "do you want to come upstairs? I have tea or coffee..."

"Coffee sounds great," he said and we walked up to my apartment together.

As soon as I opened my door, I placed my heels in the corner. I put my coat back on its hook, and headed straight for the kitchen to begin making a pot of coffee. I really don't like the taste of coffee, but I always have it at my place because my friends love coffee.

Once the coffee was beginning to brew, I set my purse on the counter and said, "thanks for dinner, Tom. I had a great time."

"I did too," he said as he walked towards me. He placed his hands against the wall behind me, sandwiching me around his arms. I leaned back against the wall and the champagne on his breath danced over my lips as he spoke. "I've been meaning to say this all night..."

"Yeah?" I asked. I nervously chewed on the inside of my cheek. He has such thick, dark eyelashes. I could feel time standing still as he looked at me longingly.

Tom's gaze lowered to my mouth and I felt my lips part. I could feel my heart beating faster and faster, leaping out of my chest against his. No words came out but he leaned in and he stopped when his lips brushed against my cheekbone. His light touch sent shivers of pleasure and panic down my spine. He finally whispered as if his throat was coated in honey, "if you want me to stop, tell me now."

I did not say anything, because I really did not want him to stop. He brushed his mouth against the hollow of my temple, and he whispered, "or now." He used his finger to trace along my collarbone. "Or now." When I still said nothing, he added my jaw to the route. I lifted my chin up to grant him access, but then his lips were by mine. The moment I looked into his eyes, he owned me. In his breath, he whispered, "or now," before his lips finally pushed against mine.

Now I know what people mean by how they melt when they kiss someone they love. My body dissolved into his as my eyes closed to savor the moment I kissed him back. His hand rested against my neck and his thumb grazed my jaw. He has such nice hands. Our kiss felt so natural, like we've done it a million times before. It was soft at first, then we both fell into it. He shuddered and there was a sound from the back of his throat, like a half-growl, half-moan. My head was swimming as he was the only solid thing in my dizzy world.

"I'm sorry, I just can't help it..." he said softly with his lips still against mine. His lips were soft like cotton candy, and I fell into the sweet trap. He asked rhetorically, "do you have any idea how many times I imagined being with you? You are stunning, like a sunset, and you are as pleasing as the smell of rain. You're as beautiful as the prettiest poetry ever written, and even Michelangelo would have used you as his muse in a heartbeat."

I had never been complimented so beautifully before. My knees felt weak just by his lovely words. I didn't know what to say back, so I resorted to sarcasm.

"You're a better kisser than I imagined," I joked with him, murmuring into his mouth. All of our kisses before now have been little absentminded platonic pecks, they don't really count. My eyes fluttered open momentarily and saw that his were still closed in pleasure. I brought my hand up and slid my hand through his soft hair slowly. At long last, this moment had arrived and I thanked God I was alive to experience it.

"Glad to know I didn't disappoint." I almost felt him laugh but he came back to my lips. We kept luring each other back and forth, and his other hand rested against my back to save my spine from the hard wall. "If you don't feel the same, then honey, I might be a goddamn fool but I had to tell you what you do to me."

The gentle kiss graduated into one of passion. I pushed off the wall and sealed the space that was between us. I pressed into him and dug my fingers in his hair. I felt him rip off his coat and we separated for just enough time for him to pull off his sweater. I let him put his hands on me. He pulled me back in, making up for the time our lips were apart. I stopped breathing, but I gasped when Tom put his hands on my hips and lifted me up as if I were a bag full of hot air. My legs wrapped around his waist as we deepened the kiss. I was hungry for more.

Tom began to carry me to the nearby couch. I did not realize that he had unzipped my dress until I felt the cool air on my back and the chill of his fingers grazing down my spine. My heart was beating so loud, but I didn't want it to stop.

I heard a clammer and I shot my eyes open and moved my head in the direction of the noise. His lips then grazed to my blushing cheek as I noticed that he had bumped into my side table, knocking the lamp off the surface. I didn't care. I giggled and put my hands around his face and brought my lips to his once again. He closed his eyes before I did and he fell onto the red couch, and I felt the plush of the seat against my back. I was looking up at Tom, and he hovered over me. Our hearts beat as one. It was like we were the only people in the world, and nothing else in the universe mattered.

I knew exactly how to make Tom go crazy. I pulled his hair gently and I breathlessly called him, "officer." That sparked a fire inside him, because he fell deeper into our kiss. I used to think that when it came to love, if it's not rough then it isn't fun, but following Tom's lead with a loving and gentle touch was making me think that I don't care what we do, as long as we are together.

"And here I was thinking you were innocent," he nearly whimpered.

"Have to say I was thinking the same about you, Officer," I quipped back.

Tom's lips left mine and he kissed my jaw and made a series of kisses down my neck. His throat was humming with soft moans and his warm touch sent a rush of blood all over my body. I felt dazed and completely unprepared, but I was yearning for more.

I twirled some of his fluffy brown hair between my fingers when a sudden realization came over me. I did not want to care, but I began feeling dirty that I was making out with a man who was in a committed relationship.

I asked him softly, "what about Jackie?"

"What about her?" He asked in a hoarse voice as his lips were against my neck, completely unbothered.

I pushed up on his shoulders so he would stop and look at me. I could feel the muscles in my face relax as I had stopped smiling for the first time in a few hours. His eyebrows came together in confusion and he licked his lips.

I said in a serious tone, "I'm not going to be the other woman, Tom. You know me better than that."

"I broke up with her," he revealed.

"What? When? Why?" I asked, tilting my head at him. I thought that they were going steady. I tried to stay out of their relationship because it upset me seeing him with someone else. I never thought I'd be jealous, but I was.

Tom leaned back which allowed me to sit up. He said, "I'm not afraid to tell you how I feel anymore. I don't know if it's the champagne talking, but I feel so secure when I'm with you. I've been running around in circles in my mind, but I always came back to you because you take me to the places I'd never find alone. You give my life direction, and you make everthing so clear to me. Every single second I was with her, I was only thinking of you. Can't you see what you do to me? It's undeniable that I'm irresponsibility mad for you."

My lips parted as I tried to respond, but he rendered me speechless. I finally croaked out, "and I with you."

Tom chuckled while looking down at me. He brushed some of my hair out of my face and lovingly said, "there's only one thing in this world that I want."

"What do you want?"

"You. I want you, Mick. Will you go out with me?"

I should have known this was coming, but I was still caught off guard. I'm have never been easy. I don't trust easy, and I don't fold easy. I'm not easy to love. How can I love someone if I'm afraid to fall for him?

"You don't want me. You don't want to deal with all of my baggage," I told him honestly.

"I want the good, the bad, and the ugly. I want all of it, Michelle. You are all I want and I want everything that is part of you. I'm not going to hurt you."

I wanted to hesitate. I fear commitment because I am afraid of future abandonment and loss. What if he breaks my heart and leaves me? But when I saw the way he looked at me and listening to his sweet words, all of my doubt somehow went away all at once.

I beamed up at him. That desire and submission in his eyes were alluring. I see you, they say. His dreamy eyes have the surety of: I actually know what I want and it's completely you.

Through self-reflection, I have found that I try to act overly independent and self-sufficient to mask my deep seated fear of abandonment and a need for connection. I have been alone for so long, and Tom is the first person I have let in.

I was going to give him all my love, love that I've been saving for only him. What was once scared and cold, he was thawing my heart, and he was making me feel like I had nothing to hide. I felt like my heart has been waiting for him my whole life, and I'll continue loving him for a thousand more years. All I really want is to have no regrets, and I don't think I'll have any regrets with Tom.

"I never make promises that I can't keep, but I can promise that I'll always make you happy. But don't forget about Jump Street's rules."

We are both cops, so following the rules is in our blood. If keeping our relationship a secret was going to let us keep our jobs, I could do that. Plus, it would be hot to have to sneak around.

"Wow, when I first met you, you never would have broken rules like this," I stated, moving my hand from his hair to his square jaw, drawing circles on his skin gently with my finger. With my other hand, I began unbuttoning his blue shirt.

He chuckled, "yeah, but I never had a reason to until I met you. And, I'm really sorry for standing you up at the airport yesterday."

I smiled warmly. I had already forgotten it. "Don't be. If you didn't, I don't think we would have ever done this."

"And it would be eating at me forever," he said and gave in to the temptation of kissing me again possessively. Against my swollen lips, he murmured, "you're so beautiful."

I gripped the fabric of his shirt collar in my fists and pulled him back down to me. We kissed as I slowly laid back on the couch with his big hands on either side of my body. I saw the attractive veins on the back of his hand and his well groomed nails. My fear was fading fast. I could taste the sharpness of the champagne on his tongue as it danced with mine. His hand slid under my dress, and I bit his lip slightly, which caused him to groan tenderly.

By the time I was aware of my fingers, they had already slipped under his blue shirt. His skin was smooth and his body heat radiated warmly against my fingertips. I used muscle memory to finish releasing the buttons of Tom's shirt and we tossed it to the floor. I felt his long, slender fingers caressing over my skin, sending shivers down every inch of my body, and my dress soon joined his shirt on the floor. My fingers ran down his smooth chest and found the button to his pants.

I closed my eyes and Tom took my hand and led me above the clouds. I felt so light, I could fly up and get lost in the stars that reflected in his eyes. He made me feel shiny and new. I am for his eyes only.

There was no where else I wanted to be at that moment.

Finally!! I had a lot of fun writing this!
Next chapter is based off of the episode A.W.O.L! Thank you for reading! 😁