August 1995

Every year, I go to the diner in Greenville that I went to with Tom years ago. It's been years since I've seen him, and he should be allowed to leave Virginia pretty soon. He hasn't called me yet, and I don't blame him. He's probably got his own life in Virginia, and he doesn't need to be reminded of his old one.

When I think of Tom, or hear his name I am no longer blinded by the misery of him no longer being in my life. Even though I will cherish him for the rest of my life, I'm happy that the feelings of loss and pain are over and I'm thankful to be free from the heartache. It hurts to say, but I'm beginning to forget Tom like he has forgotten me.

I pulled up to the diner and was greeted with familiar neon lights and the intoxicating smell of burgers and fries. It's been a whole year since I've been here, but I think I'd come more often if it was closer to Metropolis. The food is so good, and it makes me feel closer to Tom.

I walked in and the door let out a chime. One of the employees came out from the kitchen to greet me. She had crinkles by her eyes when she smiled, and she wore the same waitress uniform that I've always seen the employees in.

She grabbed a menu for me and greeted, "evening, Peaches! Nice to see you again."

I was a little taken aback by the nickname, until I realized that I recognized her as the waitress who served me all those years ago when I dropped my peach pie right in front of her. I haven't seen her since, so I guess I've always come on her day off. I laughed in astonishment and said, "you remembered."

"I remember all the customers who drop the pie," she chuckled. "Booth?"

"Yes, please."

"Follow me," she said and led me to a booth by a window. "Where's that handsome boyfriend of yours?"

I sighed and said, "at work."

"He sure is a sweetheart. Do you want a menu?"

"No, thanks," I said. I didn't need the menu because I always order the same thing. A burger and a coke, as well as their delicious anniversary peach pie. She took my easy order, and went into the kitchen.

I put my purse down next to me on the booth bench and pulled out the painting that the stranger did of me and Tom so long ago. I know it's silly, but it made it feel like he was still here. I studied the painting and looked out the window. I compared the painting to what I could see out of the window and realized that I was sitting in the same booth.

While I was waiting for my food, I realized that it had been five years, exactly the amount of time that Tom promised to meet back here for me. I've had five birthdays since he left, and every wish was for him. I wasn't going to call to remind him... it's been years and he was probably a stranger to me now. I often wonder if he still thinks about me.

I tried to move on, but it was nearly impossible. Even though I have not seen him physically in years, no one could take his place. No one held a candle to Tom. I still loved him. He was the one love of my life.

There were a pile of newspapers on the bar counter of the diner, so I helped myself to one and sat back in my booth. I held the paper up as I read the front page and I heard the door chime. I didn't pay any mind to it, and I kept reading. That was until I heard someone clear his throat beside me.

I looked up and over at the man standing next to me. He was wearing all denim, and his hair was buzzed to his scalp. I had never seen him before in my life. He said in a thick New York accent, "I saw youse through the window and I was wondering if I could get your number?"

I know that I should at least try to give people a chance, but I was getting weird vibes from this man. I repositioned the paper in my hands as I flipped to the next page and I said to him dryly, "pass."

"Easy, I was just asking youse a question, no need to get your panties in an uproar."

"I have a boyfriend," I replied uninterestedly. Even though I didn't, but he didn't need to know that. I held the newspaper up higher so he could get the clue that I was busy, but sometimes my expectations for men are a little too high. Tom made them too high.

"I don't see him here," he said as he glanced around for emphasis.

"Just leave me alone."

"You oughta forget about that boyfriend of yours. He's not here so he obviously don't care enough to not let his lady eat alone. He can't give you love that ain't there."

"We are fine. Thank you for your concern." I could not believe I was standing up for my hypothetical boyfriend. Was this a new low for me?

"Just forget him and come home with me."

"No," I said firmly.

"Then where is your boyfriend, huh?"

The newspaper scrunched under my gripping fingers. Even if I did have a boyfriend, I have the right to do things without him. I can do activities alone, and I don't need a man to accompany me for anything.

I opened my mouth to speak, but soon another man joined in on the conversation. My newspaper was blocking him, but I didn't care who he was until I heard his voice. "You heard her. Leave her alone."

"And who might you be?" The New Yorker asked.

I put my newspaper down just in time for the second guy to answer, "the boyfriend."

The paper slipped out of my hands and slid under the table at my feet. My jaw was hanging low while he smiled at me, just like he always used to. I brought my hands up to my gaping mouth and muffled, "oh my god!"

Tom smiled at me and said, "I told you I'd be here."

I was so elated, I could barely contain myself. The New Yorker had moved on already, so I jumped out of my booth and ran straight into his open arms. I hugged his neck and held him close. "I can't believe you came! Let me look at you." I pulled him away. He was just as handsome as ever, maybe more so if that was possible. His hair was starting to get long on top which he had combed back. He had a very neatly trimmed mustache and a patch of hair on his chin. I had never imagined him with facial hair before, but it suited him very well. My heart still beat fast for Tom. I exclaimed, "you're here! I can't believe you're actually here."

"You don't know how many times I dreamed of this moment," Tom said, "except we were at home and I saw Swayze too. I noticed you haven't changed the locks."

"Did you go home?" I asked.

He nodded. "I flew in a few hours ago and took a taxi. I was going to surprise you, but the apartment was dark and I figured that you weren't there. Swayze took a second to recognize me... he's gotten so big. Anyway, I booked it over here after I saw on your calendar that you were planning on being here."

"You must had just missed me," I said.

"We probably passed each other on the road," he laughed. I beamed at his happiness. Being without him was devastatingly difficult, and the pain of it was nearly unbearable. But now that he is here, I don't feel the pain anymore.

"Come, sit," I said and we sat across from each other in the booth. "You must be starving from traveling all day."

"I could eat the entire cow," Tom said as I pushed the menu his way.

As he was studying the menu, I asked, "now that your five years is up, what are you going to do?"

Tom let out a soft exhale, as if he was dreading this question. He looked up at me with his dark soulful eyes and said, "I've been given one day. I have to report back to Springfield in the morning."

"If you have to be back tomorrow morning... that means that you have to leave tonight?" I asked. The flight to Springfield is about eight hours, so that barely gave us any time at all. I felt like I was just stabbed in the heart again. I had been looking forward to seeing him again for five years, and now he's going to leave me all over again.

He nodded. "Yeah."

I checked my watch and saw that it was already nearly eight o'clock. I looked back up at him and almost yelled, "you gave them five whole years and they can barely give you a day?!"

Tom nodded. "Yeah. Men who are married get a week to be with their families."

To think that if we would have followed our young hearts five years ago, we would have had another week together rather than a couple of hours.

"When you go back, how long do you have to be there for?"

"Another five years," he muttered softly.

"That's such a long time," I groaned. "I don't want you back for just a weekend or just for today. I just want you back and I want you to stay. I need you to stay."

"I know. I'm so sorry, Mick. But, I've been given privileges. I'll be able to write and call more often. Once it's over, I'll be able to retire and never have to go back. One guy was able to get a second visit home during his last round, so I'll try to get that too."

"Promise?" I asked. It sucks, but it's better than radio silence. I feel like I've been punched in the stomach.

"I promise. After this, I'm done."

The waitress came by with my food and to take Tom's order. He ordered the same thing as me, but with fries. I wanted to be polite and wait to eat until he got his food, but he implored me to eat it before it got cold.

I squished the burger between my fingers and took a bite. This diner still makes the best burgers I've ever eaten. I made eye contact with Tom as I chewed, and his lips twitched into a smile. I chuckled and wiped my mouth with a napkin and asked, "what are you looking at?"

"You are still as beautiful as I remember. Does time stand still in Metropolis?"

I chuckled and tried to hide my blushing with the burger. I may have been laughing on the outside, but I wanted to cry on the inside because of how in love I was with this man. Tears shed from my heart, because it was my fault that I fell in love with him, but what can I do?

I said, "when love is all you know, time seems to stand still."

The waitress came by and set Tom's order in front of him. She asked if we needed anything else, but we reassured her that we were fine.

I asked, "is there anything new going on with you?"

He leaned back and pondered my question for a moment before he answered, "well, I've started growing out my facial hair... I got a cat, I named him Jerry... oh, now I have hair on my shoulders. I don't even have a joke for that, that's how much I hate that shit."

I had to cover my mouth with my hand because I was laughing so hard. Even Tom joined. When I finally caught my breath, I said, "I'm sorry, that's not funny but it's so funny."

Tom cleared his throat and rubbed his lip with his finger as his laughter subsided. He asked, "so... it's been five years. How's work?"

I blew a raspberry and said, "it's tough. Had a missing person's case we finished just last night so I'm taking the weekend off."

"I can imagine. The Federal Bureau of Investigation don't mess around," he said with a smile.

I grinned back at him. He was the first to know that shortly after I quit Jump Street I landed a job as a Special Agent at the Federal Bureau of Investigation's field office in Metropolis. I went through rigorous training over at Quantico, then I transferred to the Metropolis Field Office. No one calls me the kiddie cop over there, instead they call me hotshot since I'm new. We combat violent crime including gangs, fugitives and missing persons cases, crimes against children, kidnappings, and robberies. My experience working undercover has helped immensely, but I prefer to study the behavioral side of the cases.

I have the opportunity to go undercover a lot, and I have my own partner again. David Holt. Holt has been on the force longer than I've been alive, and he loves to remind me. It took a while, but we have warmed up to each other. We do make a great team, but it is not the same as going undercover with Tom. I miss him as my partner.

Tom asked, "are you with anyone?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm not. What about you?"

I almost didn't want to know the answer to this question. Tom is smart, handsome, goofy, passionate, and amazing. I would be shocked if he was still single after all this time. Any girl would be lucky to have Tom. When we were together, girls were throwing themselves at him all the time.

He said, "I promised myself that I would never fall for anyone unless it was you that I fell into."

I smiled at him thoughtfully. He always said the most perfect things. My heart was melting for him again, and I couldn't control it. I didn't want to fall for him again, because that would make his departure even more torturous. Was it illegal to kidnap him from the DEA?

Suddenly, his watch began beeping which made my blood run cold. He squeezed the side of his watch to make the beeping cease, and he didn't have to tell me what that alarm meant. It meant that it was time for him to go.

He quickly finished his meal and we both stood up from the booth. I didn't want to talk because I didn't want to cry, so instead he wrapped his arms around me in a goodbye-hug. I wrapped mine around his neck and rested against him.

"I can drive you to the airport," I offered.

Tom said, "I've already paid the taxi, it's okay."

"Do you really have to go?" My voice and my heart began to break.

He rested his hand on the back of my head and inhaled like he was going to speak, but then he didn't.

I whispered, "I hate saying goodbye... it hurts."

"I know," he managed to say. We pulled apart and he looked down at me and I noticed a light glisten in his watery eyes. He sniffed and cupped his hand to my cheek and said, "I wish I was around, because I just want to make you happy. But, I'll see you in a few years?"

I smiled back and said, "as long as you're under the same stars as mine... I'll be okay."

"Nothing will ever change the way I feel about you." He leaned forward and pressed his soft lips to my forehead. I closed my eyes to savor the moment, and opened them when I felt him pull away.

"Before I forget..." I said as I leaned back into the booth and grabbed the painting. I held it out to Tom and said, "it's your turn with it now."

Tom took the painting fondly and held it to his chest. He looked back at me before he leaned forward and gave me a tender kiss on the cheek. I gave him one last hug, wishing he could stay in my arms forever. He said softly, "just hold me in your heart. I swear, it will get easier. I won't ever let you go. Wait for me to come home."

A horn honked outside, which was his taxi driver telling Tom that he was there. We pulled apart and said our final goodbyes. He took the painting and left. He looked back at me before he snuck out the door, and I sat back in the booth and watched him run out to his taxi cab. He took my heart with him as he drove away.

Every hour I waited for him, and every breath I took had led me to that very moment where I knew I'd have to say goodbye again. Goodbyes gave me the worst pain. I think I'd rather shoot myself in the foot than have to wait five more years just to see him again. 

I didn't want Tom to go back to being an old memory, but I had no choice. I wish I could live through every memory again, just one more time. I would trade everything for Tom to stay with me. When he looks at me and the whole world fades, I will always remember us in this way.

When I finished my meal, the waitress told me I was all good to go because Tom paid for it all. I didn't even notice. I walked briskly through the dark back to my car and started my long drive back home. The light of the moon reflected softly against the promise ring I have worn every day since Tom gave it to me. The radio was turned down low, and I couldn't even bring myself to listen to it. I was just so incredibly sad.

When I made it back up to my apartment, I realized the kitchen light was on when I thought I had turned it off. I figured Tom accidentally left it on when he swung by earlier, which was a good call because it gave Swayze some light so he could move around.

I heard Swayze's collar cling together and his paws land on the floor from my bedroom just before he trotted up to me with a big, goofy and slobbery smile. I put my purse on the counter and greeted him with a smile just as big, my tears welling in my eyes.

"Hi, mister. Hi, mister. Oh, what a good boy. Hello," I said to him while petting his beautiful golden coat. "Are you ready for bed? Let's go to bed."

Swayze mindlessly followed me as I slowly walked to my bedroom. I noticed a soft yellow glow omitting from the open door, but figured that I left that light on and I needed to change the lightbulb pretty soon.

The moment I crossed the threshold of my bedroom door, I stopped in my tracks. My heart practically leaped out of my chest when my eyes met with Tom, who was standing at the foot of my bed, waiting for me to come home. He gave me a little smile, and that's when I noticed the glow from a hundred candles flickering in the otherwise dark room and the rose petals that were clustered on the floor and on my bed.

"Tom!" I covered my mouth with my hands, my smile growing widely. I ran and threw myself into him, and he wrapped his arms around me tightly. "Oh my god, oh my god. I can't believe you are here."

Tom chuckled softly and said, "I might have told a little lie when I said that I was leaving again."

"You asshole." My laugh turned into a cry, and Tom rubbed my back tenderly. I finally took a step back from him and wiped the tears from my eyes with the back of my hand. "Is this why you left early? To put this together?"

Tom flashed his crooked grin at me and said, "yeah. I needed to make sure Swayze wasn't going to eat the roses, and that I wasn't going to burn your apartment down."

I laughed and sniffed, tears were still flowing down my cheeks. "God, I missed you so much."

"I missed you more."

"When you told me that you were going back again, that crushed me."

"I know, I know. I am so sorry. That is the last time I take any sort of romantic advice from Doug."

"Please don't do that again," I said playfully, through my happy tears.

"I promise." Tom pulled me back into a hug. He obviously felt really bad about misleading me, but at this point I didn't even care. I was just glad that he was back home to stay.

"Don't ever leave me again."

Tom started to slowly pull away from me as he said, "that's something I want to talk to you about."

My eyebrows scrunched together and my stomach dropped like a ball to the floor. I took a step back and looked at Tom worriedly.

Tom's voice shook slightly as he said, "these last five years without being able to see you was... torture. And I've been tortured so I know what it's like. And seeing you in front of me... I can't help but tell you how much I've loved you for all these years. There hasn't been a day that has passed that I did not think about you. I don't think I can handle going another day without seeing you. I thought that the DEA was everything and I was wrong. You... you are everything. I love you, and I will forever love you for the rest of my days."

Tom's voice was deeper now. He spoke slower, and had a cadence of intellect. As always, his words were poetry. When I was living and growing up, he was too. I felt regretful that I missed it. We have both gone through so much in our time apart.

Tom took his hands in mine and continued, "Mickey, I can't live without you. I don't want to live without you and I'm going to do everything in my power to prove it. You make me feel like I'm twenty-one again, and I know I'll be loving you for the rest of my life. I know that it was wrong for me to leave, I belong here right by your side. I've known it from the moment that we met that there was no doubt in my mind how I felt about you. I want to grow old with you. I want to die when I'm a hundred years old in your arms. I know I've disappointed you, but I'm asking if you'd give me another chance. I've got... a..."

Tom's voice trailed off when he pulled a little black box from his pocket and he got down on one knee. I stepped back and my hands immediately covered my mouth. He opened the box to show me a beautiful gold vintage ring.

I was almost speechless. Everything I've thought about, he had the courage to say. He looked up at me with his big doe eyes, eyes that I fell in love with many years ago. I still was, and always have been, stupid in love with Tom Hanson.

I stayed as silent as I could so I could give Tom the opportunity to ask me before I beat him to it. Through the pounding of my own heartbeat in my ears, he said, "this ring belonged to my mother. Every time I saw it, I always thought of you because of the love it represents. Michelle Janine Gregg, will you marry me?"

I smiled and nodded while happy tears sprouted in my eyes. "Yes. Yes!"

A smile swiped across his face and he plucked the ring from the box and I gave him my hand. He slid it onto my finger, right over his promise ring, and then he stood up and stepped into me. Tom wrapped his arms around me and picked me up. I put my arms around his neck as I closed my eyes, I've always felt so safe with him. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and his hands supported my weight from below.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to ask you that." He smiled at me. "I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

When I thought about the rest of my life, I was finally looking forward to it again. I get to spend the rest of my days with the man I am so in love with. We get to grow old and grey together, just as we always wanted.

This is the 100th update!! 🥳🎉 thank you all for sticking with me 💗