༺ Thin Ice ༻

     Was it uncomfortable trying to dodge Ricky and Lip for the rest of Carlos's birthday party? Absolutely. And the longing looks they were giving her from their seats on the haystacks in the barn did not help at all.  But it wasn't as bad as dodging Ricky and Lip during rehearsals. Thankfully, Megara couldn't get anyone to cover her shift last minute on Saturday when Miss Jenn called the group in for an emergency rehearsal, so she spent the day coasting work with Red and Kourtney.

     But Ricky wouldn't stop texting her.  Apparently, Miss Jenn and his dad had hit it off during Carlos's birthday party (big shocker there), and their first date was scheduled for later on that evening.  There was also the matter of North High changing their show to Beauty and the Beast as well, further complicating matters, and he mentioned Miss Jenn wanted to talk to her ASAP about a solo opportunity.

     The only song Megara couldn't get off her mind was Nini's.  Miss Jenn essentially panicked and asked Kc if they could wiggle Nini in — what with her being the main role from last semester and all — thus birthing a duet moment for Ricky and Nini.  It was enough to give Megara hot flashes.  She knew they decided to fully remain friends after breaking up, but there was something clawing at her that she didn't understand just yet.

     Nini mentioned something about a breakthrough moment they shared while rehearsing for HSM when they tried to get their show to air at the El Rey theatre (around the same time Miss Jenn had passed out and had some weird dream involving Ryan Evans), but Megara just assumed it was some weird and emotional thing.  She knew firsthand just how bad Ricky was at letting things go, so she imagined Nini wasn't fully out of his picture yet.  That had to be the only reason he was fully on board with continuing Operation Heart Stealer, right?

     Not long after a string of weird texts from Ricky, Nini sat in the booth in the brightest window (dubbed the "best booth" by Big Red), angrily scribbling on her paper.  Megara scooted over to be in Nini's line of view.  "Another drink, Sal-Robs?"

     "This is going so horribly," Nini confessed.

     Megara dug her hands into her apron.  Sure, Nini had never been one to shy away from being honest or totally open about whatever she was feeling, but it still shocked Megara sometimes to hear her bluntly express her feelings.  "I'm sorry about that."

     "I'm trying to think about how the rose could be feeling, but it's hard because it's just a flower," Nini tugged at her bangs.

     Megara frowned, her unruly eyebrows knitting together as she watched the brunette, studying every inch of her face.  Sure, she'd seen Nini stressed, but this was something else entirely.  "What's bothering you?"

     Nini sighed.  "It's just a lot of pressure.  I just came from rehearsal, and they're all stressing about the change in plans.  We have to be better, like so much better just to stand a chance."

     Megara raised her eyebrows, honestly a little relieved to hear Nini voice her concerns.  "Girl, you're preaching to the choir.  On one hand, Miss Jenn has been up my ass about making sure Ricky is at his best and on the other hand, she's been on my neck about my singing.  And I have one of the smallest roles, I can't imagine how you're feeling right now."

     Nini's lips twitched into a smile.  "You know... if you have a minute, I would love to hear your opinion on some lines."

     Megara glanced behind her, where an unassuming Kourtney and Howie were relentlessly joking back and forth about... well, whatever.  Megara tried keeping track at first, but after a while, she got lost in their little games and wordplay.  She loved Kourtney but hearing those huge dorks for so long started to make her brain cells cave in.  "Yeah, anything to escape that."

     "What's going on with that anyways?" Nini asked as Megara slid into the booth, now sitting directly across her.

     "Hell if I should know," Megara shrugged.  "One minute it's 'that little man is my employee' and the next..." they turned to see Kourtney giggling at something Howie had said.  "All I know is that it's scaring customers away, and bugging me."

     Nini laughed.  "She's got a crush.  You remember what that feels like, don't you?"

     Megara's world slowed as she remembered just how debilitating it felt to allow herself to feel attraction toward someone.  Most crushes she had came and went, and she'd always be very appreciative of their quickness.  She also remembered how far she'd come with Ricky, from fighting over plastic toys, clutching them in their small hands as they ran from each other (since Ricky always wanted to destroy her Bratz and Megara always wanted to play with his Spider-Man action figures).  She thought about all that time they spent trying to avoid each other in the hallways at school, every now and then saying something like "my dad says hi" when they saw each other in passing.  She remembered how she'd overheard Nini dumping him last year, how wide-eyed and clueless Ricky had been.  If Megara ever had a crush on him, she wasn't sure that she remembered it anymore.  Whatever she shared with him now was much bigger, stronger, and all-consuming powerful.

     "I guess," she shrugged, trying not to think about Ricky even though she knew Nini was going to bring him up anyways.

     Nini scooted her paper sheet over to Megara, the raven-haired girl immediately looking over the sweet cursive writing as she thought about her lyrics.  "How's that been going?" Nini asked.

     Megara raised a questioning eyebrow as she looked over the paper.  "Are you sure you wanna talk about your ex-boyfriend with me?"

     Nini shrugged.  "It's no big deal to me, Ricky and I are better as friends and we've been making really good progress!  Like sometimes, we even talk about you and Kc."

     Megara softened up a little upon hearing this.  She hadn't known, because truth be told, she hadn't been spending all that much time with Ricky lately.  "That's nice, I'm glad to hear it."

     Nini grinned, placing her hand over Megara's.  "He and I were never going to work, but you guys on the other hand..."

     Megara turned, hoping her face hadn't become flushed with blood drawing to her cheeks.  "Oh, stop it."

     Nini laughed, expecting how she could get a rile out of Megara easily and it was funny to her now.  "You make him really happy, which is so awesome, but it's also really great what you do for him.  You guys are really sweet together."

     Yeah, except for the fact that it was all fake.  "Did you just... thank me for taking him off your hands?" Megara slowly asked.

     "Hm, I suppose I did," Nini sat back in her booth, smugly smiling as she mocked Megara by crossing her arms over her chest, the way the raven-haired girl usually did.

     Megara squinted.  "You're on thin ice.  But your song is coming along well.  What's the problem?"

     Nini returned back to being serious.  "I just feel like it won't connect with the audience."

     Megara scratched her neck awkwardly, an itch forming where her apron cusped her skin.  Sweat collected at the nape of her neck from running back and forth in the kitchen, which she hoped no one could tell since her hair was in a messy bun.  But her appearance was the last of her worries.  "Hm, what if you snuck in some parts from Ricky's point of view?"

     "What do you mean?"

     "Well, I mean, Ricky as the beast.  Maybe about how he idolizes the rose because it's a symbol of love, but he's close to never feeling love ever again.  I'm sure it would be tricky, but maybe include how this is hard for the rose since he is putting a lot of pressure on it, it might gear up some emotions for the audience."  Megara watched as Nini took the sheet back from her and started scribbling something down.  "So, uh... another drink?"

     Sure enough, the red glass Nini had been drinking out of (Big Red insisted she had to buy something if she was going to sit in the "best booth") had only a little bit of melting ice left.  "Iced tea, please."

     Megara smiled as she grabbed the cup and wiggled out of the booth, leaving Nini in her bubble of solitude.

     "Five questions to really know someone's character," Miss Jenn spoke as the kids gathered on the bleachers.  Megara had promised to try and catch as many rehearsals as she could, meaning she had to switch shifts with whoever she could at work.  "Today, I want you all to go fully method.  Stay in character for this entire exercise.  I want each of you to come forward, I'll prompt you with a question and you'll answer in character.  Gaston, let's start with you."  EJ stepped forward to prepare as Miss Jenn looked at him with her binder.  "Question one: If you had to pick one book to live inside, what would it be and why?" 

     "Like a book of etiquette?  You know, 'cause Gaston could really use some manners, always spitting and shooting stuff, like, chill, Gaston," EJ answered with his signature easygoing chuckle.

     Savannah rolled her eyes, sitting in the back of the bleachers as she watched him talk.  She wore a thick hot pink sweatshirt with white jeans — Megara was sure that if anybody could still pull them off it was her.  Every now and then, the blonde glanced at her lap, pretending she was more interested in her chrome painted fingertips, but in reality, she was keeping entertained by watching everybody else.

     Rows in front of her, Megara rubbed her elbows, even though she was wearing a long sleeve she still felt chilly.  On top of her black long-sleeve was a tan collared shirt with a belt buckle, which she matched with black yoga pants and tan slippers.  Thankfully, Miss Jenn was relaxed with their dress code for rehearsal.  Besides, the dress code was really one of the last things on Miss Jenn's mind as she pushed the group of teens toward Menkie Award victory.

     Rita and KC sat nearby, Rita taking down some notes at the request of Miss Jenn but even she was bundled up in a thicker jacket for the harsh weather.  The only difference was that she chose to wear her glasses today, thin brown frames around her big brown eyes.  Kc was wearing a plain blue long sleeve (which was usual for her), a white tank top poking out underneath.

     "Love that," Miss Jenn said.  "Okay.  What would you ask your future self?" 

     "Oh, trick question.  Gaston's dead," EJ smiled, but Miss Jenn looked at him sternly.  EJ gulped.  "I'd ask him if he could learn to love anyone after Belle," he answered honestly.  "I mean, anything's possible, right?"

     "Intriguing," Miss Jenn's eyes drifted to Megara, as EJ took a seat next to her and Ricky.  "Alright, lovely maiden."

     "You couldn't mean me," Megara said as dry as she could, which made EJ chuckle.  She turned to face him in amusement, quietly thankful that he laughed at her dumb attempts at breaking the ice.  Usually Ricky did, but even though he sat right next to her, his head seemed to be somewhere else.

     Miss Jenn motioned to the front.  "Step right up to bat."

     Megara got up from her spot and walked over to the cube, taking a seat as Miss Jenn readied her questions for her.  "If you had to pick one book to live inside, what would it be and why?" Miss Jenn asked.

     "I don't think the lovely maiden can read, can she?" Megara asked.  Miss Jenn stared at her, offering her no help, just the piercing stare from her big eyes.  She tried not to pay attention to the group of people staring at her, relying on her for a perfect answer.  "Okay, um... something profound, I think.  Something that she could learn from, especially after... losing Gaston.  Maybe The Waves by Virginia Woolf, even though it hadn't been written yet."

     Miss Jenn nodded.  "And what would you ask your future self?"

     Megara took a sharp breath in.  "Just if she ever could get over him.  Gaston, I mean.  If she ever figured out how to be okay on her own."

     "Wow, really?" Seb asked, holding his face in his hand as he watched her talk.

     "I mean, the girl can't even read, probably."

     "You mean you can't even read," Miss Jenn corrected.  "Elaborate on that."

     Megara nodded.  "Right.  I can't read.  My whole life revolves around a guy who doesn't really even notice when I'm there or not.  He takes me for granted.  I'd hope that I could turn things around for myself."

     Miss Jenn could sense a deeper connection than Megara was letting on, but she decided to refrain from pushing her further.  "Alright, you're good," she said.  Megara smiled and waddled back to the bleachers.  "Mr. Beast.  Wanna give it a go?"

     "Sure," he gave her a tight lipped smile, patting Megara's knee once as he stood up and sat down at the cube where she'd just been.

     "If you had to pick one book to live inside, which book would it be and why?" 

     "Well, as the Beast, it's canon that I can't read," he tilted his head, his soft curls moving with him as he did.

     She wasn't sure where the courage came from, but Megara decided to chime in.  "Eeeh!  I already said that!"  Ricky squinted his eyes as their friends laughed at them.  At least they could be known for being a playful, happy couple.

     Miss Jenn ignored Megara.  "So Beast, I'd like you to take this seriously.  Next question.  What would you ask your future self?" 

     "Uh, I guess if I ever miss the old days, when I was all alone in the castle," Ricky said.  Megara could see his leg twitch, as if he wanted to bounce it.  She struggled with the same problem, but usually some coffee and her anxiety medication kept it at bay.  Still, she noticed it.

     "And why would you miss that?" Miss Jenn questioned him.

     "Everything was the same every day.  Nothing changed," he swayed his foot, Megara noticed.  He turned to his friends, trying to remain upbeat and positive.  "I mean, the forks didn't talk, teapots didn't sing."

     "Okay, let's go deeper with this feeling," Miss Jenn pushed.

     "Think that's all I got," Ricky dryly chuckled.  Megara noticed this too, it was the same half-hearted and stupid chuckle she did all the time when she felt awkward or out of place.  Either Ricky was learning her habits, or she wasn't as unique as she thought she was.

     "But when you say that nothing changed—"

     "I'm really trying here.  Can you get off my back?" Ricky finally snapped.

     Megara wasn't really surprised, but maybe that was because he'd been like that with her before.  She had to remember not everyone had seen all of Ricky's sides before, they'd just seen the fun and goofy sides of him.  She sat up a little straighter, her interest peaking.

     She was a little surprised by what happened next.  "Can you watch your tone?"

     "Yeah.  Okay, Mom," Ricky tried to mutter under his breath, but those close enough — like Megara, EJ, KC and Rita for example — had caught it exactly.  Oh.

     "Let's take a ten, everyone.  But stay in character, please," Miss Jenn announced before turning those wide, slightly frightened eyes to Megara.  She knew exactly what she was asking, she'd asked it many times before.  She was silently pleading with Megara to take care of the matter.  Not really resolve anything, but just take care of Ricky.  If she could watch over him, just as she had been doing, then maybe things wouldn't be so bad.

     But Megara didn't leap out of her seat.  It wasn't that she wasn't interested in Ricky — if anything, she was ten times more interested in his wellbeing than ever.  She knew better than anybody what his mom was like, then and now.  When she had shown up last time with her boyfriend, she threw Ricky off for the rest of the show.  And who had been the one to give him the lame pep talk (more like the 'I'm sorry your mom sucks' talk) in the hallway?  Megara f'ing Montez.  She couldn't blame him though, not if she ever tried.  Ricky and her may have fought nasty in the past, but she'd come to accept she was the one person who knew him best.  It was why she wasted energy with his mom and told her straight to her face that bringing her boyfriend was a bad idea, or started teaching him how to cook (even if he was kinda clumsy in the kitchen).

     She caught his eye as he passed, and in those split seconds, their silent conversation spoke volumes.  She'd leave him be for a while, she decided.  Just like that, she watched him walk out the door once again.  Maybe she felt sadly about leaving him alone for her own personal benefit, but it was clearly the best thing she could do for him.

     "Do you think that you belong?" 

     "Does anyone ever?" Megara replied.  She and Gina were sitting in the makeshift dressing room, where they'd been instructed by Kourtney not to touch anything as her costumes for the show were nearly completed.

     Gina gave her a sarcastic scoff, and it was dry enough to be compared to a Megara Montez original.  "I'm being serious."

     Megara was quiet then for a long moment.  And although she usually kept to herself, this was a new side of herself for Gina's personal viewing.  So far, she hadn't had any regrets about sharing with Gina.  "Kind of a lot, yeah."

     "How you do cope?" Gina asked.

     "Honestly?  By knowing you guys are all weirder than me," Megara shrugged.  "We're all different in many ways, some are loud and some are quiet.  I've been known to be both.  But I'm not worried about checking a box or fitting into any one label.  I think if everyone was exactly the same, there would be no truth in friendships, or any relationships for that matter.  If you're different... so be it.  Those who are truthfully your friends will love you all the more for it."

     Before Gina could say anything else, Ashlyn and Savannah stepped into the room, so she shifted her body towards them.  "Oh great, you're both here.  Look, I didn't know the right time to tell you this, but my mom got a job in Louisiana and I've never lived in Louisiana before, so I think I'm gonna join her."

     Megara, Savannah, and Ashlyn all stared at her confused.  "You're leaving?" Ashlyn asked first.

     "It's not what you think—"

     "Hold on," Ashlyn put her hands up in defense.  "Look, um, I know I can be a little moody sometimes."

     "No, I know that you—"

     "When I saw that video of North High and Lily... I get snappy when I feel threatened," Ashlyn said, surprising Megara little bit.  "I can't help it, I'm still a Caswell."

     "Ash, let her finish," Savannah calmly put her hand on Ashlyn's shoulder, the redhead then finally focusing on Gina.

     The three stood up as Megara sat at one of the horribly cushioned chairs, legs crossed over each other as she stared up at Gina.  She suddenly felt as if she'd blink then she'd miss her forever.  "Well... I did something last semester that nobody knows about."

     "I actually know about the secret understudy plan with EJ," Ashlyn said.

     Megara whipped her head in her direction.  "The what?"

     Ashlyn cringed.  "Oops..."

     Gina sighed.  "EJ and I had this plan to get Nini and Ricky out so we could be Gabriella and Troy," she calmly explained.

     "So that's why there were so many hush hush conversations, huh?" Megara asked as a blush settled over Gina's cheeks.  She remembered seeing them sneakily converse in the bunker many times last semester, she just never put two and two together.  Until now, anyway.

     "This isn't about that," Gina shook her head, changing the topic back to more serious matters.  "You know how when the plane is going down, people confess things because they know they'll never see you again?"

     "Oh my God, what did you say?" Megara stood up.  "And to who?"

     "Relax, it wasn't Ricky," Gina said.  It was only then Megara realized how strongly she might have been coming off.

     "Oh, sorry, I wasn't trying to be aggressive," Megara sheepishly apologized.  Ricky had passed her mind, but truthfully, the first thing she thought of was KC and the stupid teddy bear with a trophy.  It sucked to know something Gina didn't.

     "Do you remember on opening night, when you couldn't find me after the show?" Gina asked, but Megara imagined that was more of a question for Ashlyn than Savannah or her.

     "They told me you were getting something you needed," Ashlyn said.

     "Yeah, I suppose I was," Gina said, a little zoned out.

     The girls shared uneasy looks with each other.  Knowing Gina, it was either something little she was turning into a bigger deal or it was actually life or death.  Megara had never seen her so serious before.  "Gina..." Megara slowly asked.  "What happened?"

     "You have to promise not to tell Rita or KC about this," Gina looked at Savannah and Megara.  The blonde and brunette shared a quick glance before nodding in agreement.  "Well... it was KC.  I went up to her, I told her I liked her and that I wanted to be with her, that I would be with her if I could.  That I wouldn't quit on us if I wasn't moving away."

     The three stood in shock.  "You told her that?"

     "Yeah, the plane was going down."

     "Holy shit," Megara took a step back in disbelief over what she was hearing.

     "I mean, she started dating Nini like right after.  Like right after.  And they're so good together.  I have never seen Nini as happy as she is now when she got back from Colorado... no offense to you and your boyfriend," Gina said to Megara.

     Megara sighed, honestly not phased by that line anymore.  "None taken."

     "Wait... so, forgive me for asking, but if you liked KC then that means you're...?" Savannah trailed off, trying to get Gina to finish the sentence for her.

     Gina stood in her own fog, hoping that they wouldn't look at her differently for admitting that she liked KC.  But instead, Megara slowly grinned.  It was a devilish grin too, like she had never been happier or more impressed.  "A girl kisser."

     Savannah and Megara whooped and hollared in celebration.  Ashlyn glanced at them before asking Gina, "Well, have you talked about it since then?" 

     "What's there to talk about?  It's just been really hard and Louisiana sounds like a nice break," Gina shrugged it off, as if they hadn't been having a deep conversation just then.

     "Gina?" Ashlyn sadly asked.

     "Ashlyn?" Gina asked her back.

     "Okay, isn't there some magical thing I could say to make you consider staying?" Megara and Savannah stayed quiet in the background as they let Ashlyn try her best to reason with the hard-headed, curly-haired girl.

     "I wish but this isn't, you know, a musical.  Can't sing and dance our way out of this one."

     Ricky felt terrible the next day, to say the least.  He could only imagine what his friends could be thinking of him, what they'd be saying about him.  He never thought he had a big attitude problem, but he knew for sure that what he said wasn't him.  It was the consequences of his actions, which was pushing down his feelings to never be dealt with.  Hesitantly, he brought his knuckles to Miss Jenn's doorway and tapped.  "You can come in, Ricky," her petite voice echoed from inside.

     "I, um, just wanted to apologize as me, not as the Beast, for blowing up at you," Ricky stood in front of her desk, gripping onto his backpack strap as he talked.

     "Apology accepted," she gave him a small smile.  "I've spoken to your dad.  We both agreed it's best if we don't see each other again."

     "Really?" he asked, shocked.

     "Theater is a safe space," she nodded.  "It didn't look like you felt very safe yesterday."

     "I've just been adjusting to a lot of new stuff, recently," Ricky said honestly.

     Miss Jenn saw how quickly his face changed when he said that, which prompted her to ask, "Have you talked to your dad about it?"

     "No," Ricky shook his head.  "He's not really the parent I go to for this kind of stuff."

     "Have you spoken to your mom?"

     "We haven't talked in a minute," he was embarrased to say, but it was the truth.  Besides a text every now and then, he hadn't talked to his mom since she came to see him perform as Troy Bolton.  He thought about Megara, and all the times she'd dismissed her own mom after her parents divorced.  He supposed Megara really did know everything about everything.

     "I bet she misses hearing from you."

     Ricky's eye twitched.  "I'm not sure about that."

     "I am," Miss Jenn calmy reassured him.

     He turned and it looked like he was walking out of her office until he said.  "I'd ask him if he and Belle were still together."

     "I'm sorry?" Miss Jenn looked up, a little confused.

     "The Beast," Ricky clarified.  "That's what I'd ask my future self."  Then, after seeing Miss Jenn's content look, he finally left her office.  He closed the door behind himself and started walking the empty hallway until he heard footsteps headed his way.  He looked up and was startled to see Megara, thinking maybe he willed her existence.

     "Bowen?  What are you doing here?" she asked as she walked towards him.  He slowed down, taking in every movement of hers, and part of him thought he might pass out from the sheer weight of it all.  She was wearing the purple shirt she'd worn on Christmas, her dark hair curled around her shoulders, a black thin scarf folded over her chest, and to him, she'd never looked more like a saving grace than in that moment.

     She'd meant what he was doing in the West Wing, near Miss Jenn's office, but there was something about the overall gentleness of her voice that made his eyes swell up and gloss over.  What was he doing?

     Megara took notice to this right away.  Partly because she'd never seen him so emotional before.  She knew he was, but she'd never directly bothered with it before.  But this was different now.  She wanted to make sure he was okay.  So she kept walking towards him.  He thought she was a dream as she said, "are you alright?"

     He could barely get the words out without feeling stupid, he shook his head thinking about what he must look like to her, but she didn't mind.  And the crazy thing is that he knew she didn't mind.  Ricky looked right into her eyes right then and knew he could trust her.  "I just need..."

     In the blink of an eye, she was standing steadily in front of him.  She half expected him to pass out right then and there, which would have then sent her into a panic.  But he didn't.  Instead, he let his backpack slouch off his shoulder, hitting the floor with a dull thud and wrapped his arms around her.  She'd been used to unexpected contact by Ricky before, but this was different.  As she buried her hands into his hair, letting him fully sink into her, she swore she could feel his heartbeat coursing throughout his body.  She wasn't sure what she'd seen that was different this time, but she knew now something had changed.  Even if she'd pretend like nothing was amiss, that things were truly doormat between them, something had changed.  For both of them.

     For a rocky situationship of sorts that first started out on thin ice, Megara Montez and Ricky Bowen now realized just how deeply their trust for each other went.

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