The door opens. I open my mouth to say something, but I stop when I see Alex. She smiles at me. "Hey! What are you doing here?" she asks, smiling. "I thought you were leaving today."

I force a smile. "I am," I tell her. "I was just wondering if Colton's around."

Her smile fades a little bit. "He left twenty minutes ago. I'm not sure where he went," Alex says. My stomach drops a little. "I can call him if you want."

"It's okay," I tell her. "It was nice to see you again. It was nice to see my dad happy."

She blushes a little bit. "It was nice to see you too."

My smile fades as I start walking away. I don't even know how to describe how I feel. "Fuck," I mutter. Of course he wasn't there. It was a stupid idea.

"Shit!" I swear louder. I'm so frustrated. And now, I don't have time for anything else besides going to the airport.

I'm leaving Colton here. I'm leaving my feelings here. I'm leaving whatever did or didn't happen here. And I know it's going to haunt me in New York, but I can't stay. Maybe I wasn't meant to say anything to Colton. "Damn it!"

I don't have time. I can't chase Colton around. I have to get on my flight. I'm such an idiot. I backed myself into a corner.

I shake my head as I walk towards the elevator. I see someone holding it for me, so I walk a little bit faster. "Thanks," I say without looking at the guy.

"What are you doing here?" the guy asks. I realize it's Colton and I almost fall over.

"Oh, god," falls out of my mouth.

Colton frowns. "Is something wrong?"

"No," I say quickly. "No. Nothing's wrong."

"Why are you here?" Colton says. "I thought you were leaving."

"I am," I say. "I'll be on my way to New York in less than two hours."

Colton frowns. "And you're here because?"

I shake my head. "Are you stupid?" I ask. "I'm here for you, asshole."

"Oh," he says. "Why?"

I stare at him. "Are you for real?" He doesn't say anything. I sigh. "Look, Colton, I don't have a lot of time right now, so I need for you to not play stupid."

Colton sighs. "Why are you here?"

"I don't have a clue. I've been trying to convince myself over and over again that you're wrong for me, that I should just get on the fucking plane and leave you behind. But I can't for some reason," I tell him. "I don't know what I'm doing, or if it's the right thing, but I don't give a fuck right now. You said what you had to say and now it's my turn."

Colton just stares at me. His face his blank. I almost want to stop and walk away, but I know I'll regret it.

"I don't want to say any of this. I'm so fucking scared of getting hurt and being vulnerable," I say to Colton. "But it's not worth it. You have to know."

"I have to know what?" Colton asks. His voice, like his face, is emotionless.

"This past week has been the best fucking week. You make me so happy, it's ridiculous. And I keep telling myself that I have to be fair to Bryce, even though it's not fair to me. I've been a disaster this past week, but I wouldn't trade any of it," I tell Colton. "And I know it's safer to believe that you don't mean anything to me."

Colton stares at me and then says, "I don't want you to miss your flight."

I stare back at him. "Fuck you, I'm not done yet," I say. "I've tried so hard to write off my feelings for you, just like I did in high school."

His composure cracks a little bit. "What do you mean?"

"I'm so sorry for all the pain I caused you. I loved you, Colton. In highschool. I fucking loved you and I think it scared me, probably because of vulnerability. But I'm not letting that happen again," I tell Colton. He's trying hard not to show any emotion. "I'm not saying I love you. I'm saying that I really fucking care about you. I hated seeing you with that girl, just like you hated seeing me with Bryce."

"You're lying," Colton says.

"Why would I lie? Why the fuck would I lie, Colton? I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't have something to lose, and that's you, Colton," I say. "I can't lose you. And I don't know what the fuck happened in that bathroom, but it fucked me up. And you've  fucked me up in the best way possible."

"You should stop," he says slowly, almost like it pains him.

"No, I'm not going to, Colton." I sigh. "I know you're going to try and pretend like you don't have feelings for me, but I know you do. You don't want me to marry Bryce. You want me to be happy. And guess when I'm the happiest?" I ask. I pause before saying, "When I'm around you, when I'm with you."

"Is there anything else?"

"I don't know what to do. I'm fucking clueless. I don't know what's going to happen a week from now, but guess what? It doesn't matter. All that matters is today, and you taught me that." I search Colton's green eyes. "I don't know anything anymore. Somehow, you took everything I thought and turned it upside down so many times that I don't even know which way is up. But I know you. I know how we feel about each other. I know how right we are."

"What are you asking?" Colton says.

I smile and almost start crying. "I'm asking for you to give me a reason to stay," I say. "Say anything. Say you love me, say you care about me. Say you just want to be friends...just say something. Give me a reason to stay."

Colton sighs and runs his hand over his face. "I don't know what you want me to say, Andy," he says.

"I just told you." I take a step closer to him. "I know what you're doing. You're pushing me away, even though you don't want to. Maybe because you think it's the right thing to do, but it's not. Just tell me how you feel."

Colton looks at me, and I can't describe how he seems as he says, "I don't think we're right for each other."

"You don't mean that," I say. "I know you care about me. I know you tried not to care, tried not to have feelings for me. But that goes both ways. I didn't want to care about you, but I knew the minute you sat next to me on the flight that we were gonna be trouble."

Colton shakes his head. "You should leave."

"I'm not leaving," I tell him. "I look pathetic and desperate, but I'll be so much worse without you."

He looks at me and it's almost like remorse passes over his eyes as he turns away and starts walking towards the apartment.

"Colton." He stops with his back to me. I walk over to where he is and put my hand on his back. Butterflies fill my stomach at the physical contact. His back is warm through the thin cotton of his t-shirt. "I need you."

He turns around and I swear I see sorrow in his expression. "Please don't make me leave," I say. "Please don't push me away. Please give me a reason to stay. I can't go home to an empty apartment."

"You have Bryce," Colton says.

"You said I couldn't marry him. You said I'd be settling. I'm not going to fucking settle."

Colton shakes his head. "Bryce is a better man than I am. You should go back to him and forget about me."

I stare at Colton. I almost feel stupid again. "I'll never be able to forget. You're always going to haunt me."

"You should go," Colton says again.

I step close enough to him that there's barely any space between us. So close, but not touching. I stand up on my toes and cup Colton's face in my hands.

"I know you feel what I do," I tell him. I close the space between us and say, "Fuck everything else. We have today. Tomorrow could be shit."

Colton's tense against me. He hasn't moved into me or pulled away. "It's not going to end well," he says slowly, and I start to think we might be okay. But then he continues, "Because this is just physical. You care about me, and maybe all I want from you is a fuck buddy."

My face pales and I feel so humiliated. "Don't do this," I say quietly as tears fill my eyes. I'm begging him not to break my heart.

"I don't love you," he says. "I had a fun time, but that's it. That's all I wanted. I don't want you to marry Bryce because he makes you unhappy, not because I have feelings for you."

Colton pulls away from me. "That's so fucking classic," I tell him. "You couldn't even be original."

"You want original?" Colton says. "How about this? You use people, so I used you. I beat you at your game."

I shake my head. "I don't believe you."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Andy," he says coldly. It's like a slap to my face. "I'm sorry you care about me and I don't reciprocate your feelings in the same way. "

"So what? What was all of it for?" I ask, searching his face. I'm sure tears are falling down my face. "All of the bullshit you said? All the things we did? You're such a hypocrite. What about no fucking regrets? About living in today?"

Colton shrugs.

"You can't say it was all for nothing. You can't say you don't have feelings for me," I say, trying to rationalize.

"I just did."

I wipe the tears from my face and step back, taking a good, hard look at Colton. "Then say it again. Say it in fucking black and white and mean it," I tell him.

"I don't have feelings for you," Colton tells me, his voice continuing to be cold and emotionless. "I don't love you, Andy."

"Say it like you mean it."

Colton stares at me. "I don't know how else I can put it," he says. "I do not have feelings for you. I do not care about you. I do not know why you're still here."

"I'm so fucking humiliated right now," I tell Colton, "and I guess that means I have nothing else to lose. I know you're fucking lying right now, and I know you think it's justified. But it's not. Just be honest with me. Be fucking honest."

Colton laughs. "I am being honest."

"You're trying to hide how you're feeling. You're trying to keep your face and your emotions cold, but I can see through the fucking cracks," I tell Colton. I keep talking, and I know I'm making it worse and looking more desperate but I can't stop. "I made a huge fucking mistake in high school and I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well," Colton says. "You're four fucking years too late. You should leave."

I shake my head. "Please tell me this isn't some vendetta from high school," I say. "Please tell me it isn't some cruel joke to get even with me."

Colton sighs. "You should leave before you lose your dignity."

I stare at him. "I already fucking lost it and I don't care, because I'm losing you," I say. "And that hurts more than it should. I don't understand why you're being this cruel to me. I know I wasn't an angel, but I never deserved this. You never deserved this."

"It's what you gave me."

I run my hands through my hair and smooth down my leggings, even though they're fine. I feel more tears forming in my eyes. I keep blinking them back to the point where Colton looks wavy.

They all fall at once when I say, "Thank you for giving me the best seven days I've had in four years. Thank you for setting me free and turning my world upside down. Thank you for—" Tears cloud my voice to the point where I can't talk.

It almost seems like pity crosses Colton's face. "Please don't call me when you get your phone fixed," he says. "Goodbye, Andy."

And that fucking does it for me. I feel like I'm going to start sobbing, but I know I'm better than that. I wipe all the tears away and take deep breaths in as I get on the elevator. I'm trying not to think about any of it as the elevator goes down and I walk through the lobby. I try not to cry as I see Cooper and Malik in the car.

I get in quietly and Cooper and Malik stop talking and look at me. "So..." Cooper says softly. "How did it go?"

"He hates me."

Cooper and Malik look at each other. "Damn," I hear Malik mutter quietly.

Cooper looks at me. "Shit, I'm so sorry Andy. I feel like it's our fault. We're the ones that kept telling you to tell him how you felt."

I almost smile as I say, "The math didn't add up, Cooper."

Malik hits Cooper lightly on the back of his head. "Dumbass," Malik says. I smile.

I can't help but stare out the window, looking back at the apartment and wondering how it went so, so very wrong.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Malik asks. He and Cooper seem concerned.

I sigh. "Yeah. I'm good," I tell them. "He said a lot of shitty stuff, but I don't think he meant most of it."

Cooper frowns. "So he lied?"

"Kind of."

"Why would he do that?" Malik asks.

I shrug. "I have no idea. I know I'm trying to rationalize, and I know it's crazy," I say. "But I know Colton. He's not cruel. I just...I think he's trying to protect something. Maybe it's me, or maybe it's him. Or maybe it's some weird thing where he thinks he doesn't deserve me."

"That's makes sense," Cooper says. "It's fucked up though."

"Yeah," Malik says. "At least you tried. And fuck Colton for being a dick."

I smile. "Thank you guys for having my back."

"Of course," Malik says. He pulls up to the gate where Delta is.

"You better call us when you get your phone fixed," Cooper says. We all get out of the car. Malik hands me my bags and I hug him and Cooper.

"I will," I say. "It was so nice to see you guys."

It's kind of a blur after that. I keep thinking about what Colton said. The worst part is that there's nothing I can do. I said what I had to say. And now I have to leave Colton. I have to leave all of my feelings for him and go back to reality.

I don't know why it hurts so much.