Sana curled up on the carer's bed in the private ward of the hospital.

"Sana..", called her father.

"Hmmm.. Papa", she said trying to get up.

"No.. no.. don't get up dear. I just wanted to talk. Are you feeling sleepy already?", Mitesh Asked.

"No papa, not yet.", She said lying back on the bed and looking at him sleeping on the patient's bed.

"Your maa told me that Sidharth had been around since two days. It's good to see you two together again.", He said.

"Hmmm..", hummed Sana lost in her thought.

"I can see the love between you two. I would just say that if you have many reasons to breakup but few reasons to stay, just chose to stay because you don't want to repent later of not giving a chance to it. Breaking up a relationship is easier but staying in it and working out things together to make it better is what take efforts and is far more fruitful especially when you know that you both still love each other.", He said.

"Sana? Are you asleep?", He asked when there was no response from her.

"No papa. I am listening to you.", She said.

"Don't you think you will be happy with him?", He asked.

"I.. I.. I will speak to him tomorrow papa. You should go to sleep now.", Said Sana and Mitesh hummed and said good night to her before slipping into slumber.
.
.
.

"Good morning Sexyna", Sidharth whispered into her ear from back as she stood and watched Nakul checking the vitals of her father. His husky whisper made her shiver.

"Good morning S..Sidharth.", she stammered. Nakul glanced at them both and gave Sidharth a subtle smile before continuing his work. Sana's mother went and sat beside Mitesh's bed.

"For you!", Sidharth whispered yet again forwarding the white lillies bouquet in his hand infront of Sana. Her lips formed a soft curve looking at the bouquet.

"Thank you!", She said accepting the flowers from him.

"Can we talk, Sexyna?", he mumbled near her ear gazing at her face from her side. Having heard him, Nakul glanced at Sana, who nervously fidgeted her fingers around the bouquet as she stared ahead. Nakul subtly shook his head to encourage his best friend to say yes.

Mitesh and Nakul exchanged smiles as Nakul continued to check his nerves.

"Sexyna..", Sidharth called her again more audible to others since she hadn't responded.

"Ssshhh.. Let's get him discharged first..", mumbled Sana pointing at Mitesh making Nakul roll his eyes.

"Guys, can y'all both please stay outside and let me concentrate on my work?", Said Nakul giving a chance to them to talk in alone.

"Not you maa.. only those two noisey pots.", Nakul pointed at Sana and Sidharth when Sana's mother tried standing up to leave. Sidharth smiled for getting the opportunity he waited.

"Thank you Nakul.. (Sana glared at him making him stammer) I mean, sorry doctor. Will wait outside.. come Sexyna..",said Sidharth while Sana felt  humiliated in front of a nurse hence she threw daggers at Nakul. Finding Nakul smirk at her, she showed him her middle finger.

"Sexyna..?", Sidharth widened his eyes having observed her gesture and quickly grabbed her hand to hide her finger and yanked her outside the room.

"Stupid.. Idiot.. Good for nothing.. Dumbo..", she cursed as soon as they got out.

"What? What did I do, Sexyna?", Asked Sidharth with puppy eyes.

"Not you. It was for Nakul. (Annoyed) No wait!! Perhaps, it is you! If you had to keep your mouth shut, he wouldn't have chastised me.", She said narrowing her eyebrows at him while poking her finger on his chest three times. Instead of getting angry, Sidharth felt happy from inside for the banter she threw at him. It reminded him of them years back.

"But why are you annoyed about his words? After all, he is your best friend..", said Sidharth.

"Because there was also an outsider, the nurse, inside the room. On the contrary, why are you supporting him? You don't even like him.", She questioned raising her eyebrows while placing her hands over her hip.

"No.. I never said that I don't like him.", Said Sidharth.

"Oh yeah, you don't. You just dream of your wife being proposed by him and also sharing a romantic...", Sidharth interrupts her by placing his finger on her lips. The mere touch had ripples of a current run through her entire body. She silently stared into his eyes. He grabbed her by holding her shoulder and made her sit beside him on the bench.

"Sexyna.. I am sorry! I really am.. I told you that my insecurities were due to my dreams but when I carefully thought about it yesterday, I understood that it is the other way round. I was insecure hence I got those nightmares. Only when I understood that, I could no longer get the nightmare last night.", He confessed.

"So, did you sleep well last night?", She asked him.

"Not really..", he said.

"Why?", She asked.

"..today is the only day we have got before we meet again at Geeta's tomorrow.", He said. Indirectly he was telling her that he couldn't sleep last night because he was desperate to meet her today.

"Don't you have to go to the office?" she asked.

"Do you want me to go?", He asked.

"Why would you ask me that question?", She asked and he quietly stared into her eyes.

"I.. I mean you never asked me this question before.. why today?", she fumbled.

"Hmmm.. maybe because I realized what I really need in my life the most now..", he replied maintaining his eye contact with hers.

"Wh.. what is that?", She stuttered wanting to hear the answer she wanted to listen to since 3 years.

"I haven't been going to the office for over a week now, Sana.", He didn't give her the answer she required.

Their silent yet prolonged intense eye lock was broken when the nurse opened the door and stepped out. Sana flinched from her places as if she was caught stealing. Standing up on her feet she turned towards the nurse.

"Excuse me sister.. Is.. Is it done?", Asked Sana.

"Yes, ma'am. You may go in.", the nurse nodded before leaving.

Sana looked at Sidharth who got up from his seat. She took a few steps towards the door lost in her thoughts while Sidharth followed her. He bumped into her back when she suddenly stopped.

"Sorry.. sorry.. Did I hurt you, Sana?", He asked holding her arms and inspecting when she shrieked a little. She stared at her concerned husband silently. When he looked up at her face for not getting an answer, she bit her lips and nodded no.

"I didn't realise you would stop all of the sudden.", He said.

"Hmmm.. Will you be coming home with us after papa's discharge?", She asked.

"May I?", He asked and she nodded in agreement.

"I want to talk to you.", She said.

"Me too..", he said.

"Shall we go in?", She asked.

He realised he was still holding her arms and released his grip with a nod. He then followed her into the cabin where Nakul was cracking some joke and both her parents were laughing as usual.

"So.. how is everything? Can we take him home, DOCTOR?", Asked Sana stressing on the word doctor to show how annoyed she was at him.

"Oh yes, Mrs. Sana Sidharth Mittal. Just make sure you clear all my consultation fees before you leave", Nakul acted along.

"Yeah!! Why not? I will give you an extra tip as well.", She said with a annoyed smirk.

"Tip? Do I look like a waiter to you? Ma'am I am a doctor.", Nakul said.

"Whatever!! What difference does it make? Nonetheless, one thing is sure that you don't look like my 2 decades old best friend.", She smirked with her hands crossed.

"Very well. People often forget their best friend when they have their love of life beside them.", Said Nakul with a pouty face.

"Aaa.. ummm... I want to go home. I stink like hospital.", Sana nervously diverted the topic, while Sidharth just put his head down.

"My wife says the same thing to me and I reply to her with a simple 'same to you'.", said Nakul to reduce the awkwardness.

Sidharth looked at him perplexed.

"She is a gynecologist.", Nakul smiles.

"Oh..!!.", Replies Sidharth with a smile.

Sana goes to the billing counter to settle the bill and Sidharth accompanies her.

"I'll handle it Sana.", Said Sidharth.

"No, I'll take care, Sidharth. Papa has an insurance cover already."said Sana. Sidharth nods his head and sits on the chair kept for visitors.

Sana speaks with the cashier and then calls up the insurance company for claim. Sidharth observes her with the telephone from far for almost over 20 minutes wondering what was taking so long. He finally gets up and goes close to her.

"What happened?", He asks looking at her sad pout.

"I am trying to get connected to the claims department. Its been so long and I haven't got anyone to speak with yet.", She complains.

"Sexyna, I can take care of it. It is just a 2 minutes work.", He says.

"That's fine Sidhaaar... Hello.. Hi, my name is Sana.." She excuses by showing her index finger to Sidharth, as the phone gets answered by the insurer. Sidharth rolls his eyes and gets back to his seat. He keeps on looking at his watch and Sana for the next half an hour. She comes back and plops on the seat beside Sidharth with a deep sigh.

"What happened? Is it done?", He asked.

"Hmm.. yeah, they are processing it and it will take an hour to complete. We'll have to wait until then.", She said.

"Coffee?", He asks

"No. Instead, shall we sit in the park outside?", She suggests.

"Hmmm..", he nods in agreement.

Anything as long as you are with me sweetheart.

He spoke the remaining words at the back of his mind. They both walk outside to the park and occupy the bench. She stared blankly infront while he looked down at her small feet in silence. They wanted to talk but both didn't know where to start.

"I got nightmares too..", she said all of the sudden.

"Huh?", He lifted his head and looked at her in confusion.

"When I misca.. (choked voice and welled up eyes, she clears her throat) .. miscarried the baby, I got nightmares too..", the tear droplet burdening her eyelashes fell on her lap and ended it's journey.

Sidharth felt a heavy ball of emotions forming in his throat, he didn't know how to console her.

"I lost her once, but lived the loss in the form of nightmares for one year.", She wiped her tears.

"I was petrified to sleep at night because she came in my dream and before I could embrace her, she would disappear. I would lose her over and over again and cry my eyes out when I woke up from the nightmare. I can't describe the details of my nightmare because I don't want you to go through it.", She said when she felt his hand grip her hand which was placed on her lap.

The pain I went through for fifteen days, she went through one whole year, alone.

It broke his heart to hear her words. All the time she went through the hell in those periods, he wasn't even aware of it nor was with her.

"How old was she when it happened?", He asked gathering all the courage.

"12 weeks.. the doctor said, she was just a size of plum but she would have grown up into a beautiful human like us, right Sidharth?", She asked with a tear filled eyes now facing him. He looked at her face and nodded his head in agreement.

"I saw her in my dreams. She was...", His voice cut hers as he spoke.

"..chubby little girl child with big brown orbs, tiny little nose and rosy little lips. The bangs of her hair covering her forehead while the rest of the hair reaching her waist. She wore a pink dress and twirled happily. Her giggles are like a melodious music...", He described his daughter he dreamnt of in his dream.

He looked at her tear tainted face which was perplexed and was flabbergasted.

"How do you know?", She asked.

"She comes in my dreams now Sana.. Our daughter..", said Sidharth.

"Samaira..", they said in unison.

He nodded his head and she bursts into tears. They had vaguely discussed their future daughter and also decided upon her name while in their drunk state during the honeymoon. He hugged her and the dam of tolerance was broken by the tears of emotion which was withheld for a long time. When her sulks subsided he spoke.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier, Sana?", He asked.

Flashback

Sana smiled looking at the two dark red lines on the pregnancy kit. She called him a few times in excitement to check when he was coming home but he disconnected her call as he was busy in business meeting.

After a few hours, he came home but before she spoke to him, he asked her to pack his bag since he was going on an urgent overseas business trip. Her smile faded and a frown appeared but it wasn't noticed by him. He directly went to freshen up into his bathroom.

While packing his bag, she chuckled having a brilliant idea. She placed the used pregnancy test into a little chocolate box, hoping he would see it as he loved eating chocolates during travel and placed it into his bag.

He walked outside and quickly dressed up. Tossing the wet towel over the bed, he opened his office bag to pull some important file. Sana rolled her eyes and picked up the wet towel and threw it into a laundry bag.

"Sana, my passport?", He said and she pointed at the front zip of the bag.

"My mobile charger?", He asked and ahe face palmed running to get one from his study room.

"Thanks", He pushed the charger into his bag. He picked up his bag and she followed him to the door.

"Call me when you land", she said

"Hmm.. Bye Sweetheart", he kissed her forehead mechanically before sitting into the car and leaving.

"Bye..", she said with a sad pout and wished he would call her in happiness whenever he sees the kit.

Looking at the clock, the next morning, she waited for his call. The phone rang and she answered immediately.

"Hello..", she smiled.

"I just landed, Sana. Going to hotel. I won't be able to call you as I will be busy with meeting. Take care"he said.

"Sidhaaarth..", she called.

"What?", He asked.

"Did you eat the chocolate which I kept in your bag?", She asked.

"No, I am cutting on sugar as I don't find enough time to go to gym.", Said Sidharth.

"But it's just one pack of chocolate, what harm would it make if you eat one?", She asked.

"Sana.. I have far more important things to think about. Don't make a fuss over one bloody chocolate.", He scolded before disconnecting.

Sana was annoyed but her anger level rose when she saw that he had thrown the chocolate box into dustbin before leaving home.

The three days business trip got extended into a week which he informed her through his secretary, Lilly. She wanted to throw tantrums upon his return and scold him before personally breaking the news but red fluid shattered her entire world in that week.

She called him up and when he received it, she heard a loud music on the other side.

"Sanaaa.. Sweetheart, I am out at a party. You know what? I won the deal with our foriegn client. Yuhooo.. I am so happy. But I will have to stay here for 2 more months atleast to set-up the prerequisites of the business.", He said.

"Sidhaaarth..", she cried

"I can't hear you darling due to this music. I will call you later tomorrow.", He said and disconnected.

She cried all alone that day while he partied and got drunk abroad. The next day, he didn't call her as he woke up late due to hangover and got busy with his work. After two days of continuous crying, her tears had totally dried.

Her phone rang after 4 days. It was Sidharth but holding the phone she didn't know what to tell him.

**I was pregnant with your baby but now I miscarried it!**

**I miscarried your baby. I was pregnant earlier.**

What do I tell him? She contemplated as the phone continuously rang for few seconds. The ringing stopped and she threw the phone away. She went to her parent's house to stay during those two months, he was away. The haunting nightmares were troubling her every night.

When he returned from abroad, she wanted to open up but when she tried to open her mouth, he shut it by placing his lips over hers and indulged in quick yet wild coitus.

"I missed you so much", he said kissing her temple while cuddling her figure from her back. He couldn't see her tears which rolled from her eyes and soaked into the pillow. In next few seconds, she could hear him snore softly.

She turned to face him and saw his calm sleeping face.

Flashback ends.

"Your calm sleeping face.. I didn't wanted to disturb your mind and sleep as well.", She said cupping his face.

"What did you get with this, Sana? Loneliness, pain and heartache!", He said.

"Atleast you were happy.", She said.

"I feel guilty now. I was partying at that time. I hate you Sana, but more than that I hate myself.", His eyes watering profusely.

"Sidhaaarth.. now that you know how the nightmare feels, would you have told me if you were in my place?", She asked.

He stared silently into her eyes and then nodded no. They hugged each other and sulked quietly.
_______________

To be continued.. ❤️❤️

Sorry for not being able to post for a long time. Just as my kids recovered, I have got sore eyes. Unable to see the screen for a long time.