Chapter 20

Knowing that Anderson was next door haunted me for the next hour. I hadn't heard from him since the previous weekend, when he almost kissed me. I couldn't help but wonder if maybe he realized that it was all a mistake. I mean, we were barely even friends. We weren't even anything.

   I was in the kitchen, near the front of the house, when I heard voices outside. I glanced out the window and saw Anderson and Jessica getting into his car. I watched them until the car was gone, hoping he would look my way. But he didn't. I was being so ridiculous.  

   I spent the next two hours pretending to do homework while watching TV, and when my phone rang that evening, I hoped it would be Anderson. But when I saw that it was my dad, my heart sank. He had only called me once in the past five weeks. He checked in with my mom a few times, who told him I was doing good. But he had avoided talking to me. I knew he was embarrassed about sending me away.

   "Yeah?" I answered, angry.

   "Kelsey, hi, honey." He sounded so casual, like we did this all the time.

   "What do you want?" I snapped, flopping onto the couch.

   "I wanted to talk about Easter."

   "What about it?" I hadn't been expecting this.

   "Kennedy wants you to come home. He misses you and I thought since you'll get a long weekend -"

   "No. I miss my brother, but that's your fault. Maybe he should come here for  the weekend, and you should be alone," I suggested.

   I was already in a mood from Jessica and because Anderson hadn't even come to say hi to me. I didn't need this shit from my dad now.

   "Kelsey, why are you still angry? Your mom says you're adjusting well," he said, as if I was over reacting.

   "I am. I'm happy here, actually. But I'm still mad at you," I admitted.

   He and I had never had a close relationship, but I'd never spoken to him this way.

   "That makes very little sense," he said, and I could practically feel him rolling his eyes. "Think about Easter weekend, okay?"

   "I'm not coming back to Chicago for Easter," I said, so he actually understood. "I'll talk to Kennedy."

   "Kelsey -"

   I didn't let him finish, and ended the call before I said something I knew better than to say to my dad.

   I was just laying in bed an hour later, angry, sad, frustrated. My mom hadn't come home yet, but she texted that she would be late. It wasn't a surprise. Tab had invited me over to hang out, but I didn't feel like socializing. Finally, I started typing a text to Anderson. Maybe it was just the sadness talking, or maybe I actually just wanted answers.

  I KNOW THAT YOU'RE IN ST. CLOUD.

   YEAH, I AM. I WAS WAITING FOR YOU TO GET HOME FROM SCHOOL, BUT THEN THERE WAS SISTER DRAMA, he sent back just a few minutes later.

   AND THE PAST FOUR HOURS?

   IT WAS A LOT OF DRAMA.

   I didn't want him to know that I drove Jessica to their grandparents' house after school, or that I knew anything about her, so I didn't text him back. Now, he didn't seem as interested in me. It had been a week since he'd almost kissed me. Maybe it was over before it even began.

   IM SORRY, he sent, another few minutes later.

   FOR?

   NOT BEING IN TOUCH ALL WEEK. NOT SEEING YOU TODAY.

   WHY DID YOU ALMOST KISS ME? I asked, feeling vulnerable.

   WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY? he asked back.

   I waited, longer than I should have. What was I supposed to say to this? My phone started ringing in my hand a moment later.

   "Hello?" I answered, my voice shaky. I knew it was him.

   "I thought you wanted me to kiss you, Kelsey. I thought about that moment all week, wishing I'd moved faster. Wishing I didn't miss my chance, or that your friend didn't show up." Anderson's voice in my ear actually made my heart swell.

   "Why didn't you text me all week?" I asked.

   "Nothing seemed like the right thing to say. I kept almost calling. But I thought I sort of messed it up," he admitted.

   There was loud music and voices in the background, wherever he was.

   "I wanted you to kiss me," I told him.

   "Yeah?" he asked, his voice excited. "And what about now?"

   "Well, I'm in bed."

   He grunted. "Ah."

   "Where are you?" I asked, not knowing if it was appropriate to ask him that.

   "Across town, at a party. With Jessie." These words made little sense to me.

   "Oh, okay."

   "You could come." These words made even less sense.

   "What? No."

   "Come on. We can kiss in my car." His voice was sweet, calm. Was he drunk?

   "No," I said again. "I don't want your sister to see us."

   "Really? Why?" As if this was big shock to him, that I wouldn't want that.

   "Never mind."

   "I'll come see you tomorrow," he finished. It wasn't a question.

   I wasn't sure if that was  even a good idea, but I agreed anyway. "Okay."

   "Goodnight, Kelsey," he said, but it sounded like a whisper.

   I hung up without another word.