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Katsushika Hokusai
1831
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//long chapter

"OH, hello there gorgeous, where have you been?"  Colin Mallory smiled as he watched his girlfriend enter his dorm, she was back at Stanford, as beautiful as ever, but also mysterious as never before. "You didn't answer any of my calls."

"I...I've been busy." She faked a sad expression as he looked around his room, it was incredible how she couldn't feel anything towards him, not a single sparkle at all. Nadira was like that after all, she ran away with her cousin to achieve that life of crime and greediness, living for the money, for the status. She didn't want a puppy love with a shy and scared boy, she wished more. "Colin..we need to talk."

"Um? Sure, yeah."He sensed something was bad, it was almost like during the time he broke up with Stacy when she called him alone and ended it all. "Take a seat please." He pulled a chair as a gentleman for her, that was Colin, she was raised by Alice and Bree that way, he was the boy of anyone's dreams, the perfect boyfriend anyone could ask for, but not Nadira. "Do you want anything to eat, I could buy-"

"My mother."She interrupted him at once. "She's sick, and it looks really bad."

Colin suspended his breath in silence for a moment. "I'm so sorry, babe, I-"

"My father is too old to take care of her, so Taye and I...we..."

"But your mother lives in Australia."He widened his eyes, feeling his heart pounding in his hands. No, Nadira's mother actually lived in Nashville, but she knew this day would come, the day when she'd finally fly free from that dreamlike boy, so Australia was the perfect location to scare him off.

"I know."Her eyes shined against his, she was just as a great actress as her cousin. "But..she's my mother Colin and I...I need to help her, I'm so sorry-"

"Can't Taye go by himself?" He allowed himself to be selfish, Colin became desperate. "W-What about college-"

"I already asked to be transferred to another in Sidney."She said, then slowly grabbed Colin's Hands in hers, they were trembling. "I know it's too sudden, I didn't wish for things to go this way, I love it here, I love being with you."She lied through her teeth. "But I need to go. I can't let her there."

Colin tried to nod, trying to give a light smile as his heart shattered again, he couldn't believe what was happening, how his heart was shattering, but he still tried to helplessly mend the broken pieces that fell.

"It's okay, we can Skype, I-I can visit you there, we-"

"Colin."  She cupped his face as if he was a child. "I can't keep you waiting for something it'll never happen." He tried to speak but she silenced him. "I'm going to Sidney, I will begin a new life there. And I..."She sighed. "I won't come back. Never again."

"Nadira-"

"I want you to be happy Colin, because that's whay you deserve." She gave a light smile and stroked his cheek with her thumb. "You are the sweetest boy I've ever met, you made me feel loved as no one else ever did. The mark you made on my memory will neve be forgotten."

"Nadira please don't say that" he started to tear up, holding her hands on his face.

"But you have a whole future ahead, I don't want to hold you back from it." She insisted  "you'll be the greatest lawyer, prosecutor, whatever you want to be in this world." She encouraged him. "And I'll support you no matter what. Just not...with you."

A tear rolled down his face, it was crystalline and heartbroken, just as his fragile heart. "Nadira please...we can work it out..." he begged.

"This hurts me just as much as it hurts you, babe." She whispered. "But I need to." She kissed softly his lips as a last good-bye. "I'll miss you." She faked to cry as Colin sobbed in front of her, clinging onto her body and hugging her tight. "You'll be alright." She assured him multiple times. "I gotta go now."

"No, no, please." He asked again as she slowly got up and left his arms. "Wait-"

"My flight leaves in 15 minutes, Colin."vTaye's already waiting for me in the taxi downstairs.

"Nadira-"

"Bye Colin."

She walked througu the door, almost running away from him, entering a yellow taxi, alone. "Go, fast."

"Nadira wait!" Colin ran after the car, puffing as he was unable to reach it. She didn't look back. "Wait, I..." He stumbled and almost fell on the pavement, watching the vehicle fade into the horizon. "I...I didn't even get to say I love you..."

▫️

"I'm sorry miss, but this check is false." The attendant replied politely returning the paper in her hands. "You should talk to whoever provided it-"

"What? No, this must be a mistake, it's a real one, look through it again, please."

"Ma'am I'm sorry but this is the third time you ask me that and the result is the same." The woman informed calmly. "Try contacting the provider of the check instead to fix your issue." She gestured to the line behind her. "My apologies but you need to get out of the line so others can have their turn."

Nadira cursed in a low tone but did as she asked. She left the bank with the head held down, realizing she was fooled by that murderer. Taye was dead, she left Colin and now she was alone.

She wanted revenge, she wanted to kill that bastard, to tell everyone who he truly was.

An idea appeared.

She grabbed her phone, which she has been ignoring the whole day because of Colin's annoying calls, and looked for the contact: Alice Mallory.

She would spit out all the truth, she would ruin that man's life and that woman's innocence for once and for all.

The number was dialed, and she was about to finally call..

When a large, veiny hand, delicately took the device from her. Nadira's heart stopped as she slowly turned around to face, into that dark night, a tall sinsiter silhouette, almost a shadow by the streetlight.

"I see you did as I said. Well done, Miss Caddel." Hannibal Lecter gave a serene abd creepy smile. He glanced at the phone's screen, and clicked his tongue in disapproval. "Well, not exactly as I said."

"You...how are you in Stanford...?" She was disturbed by his sudde  presence. The street was empty, no one could listen or see them.

"A quick flight. I watched your impressive performance with Colin, then, your clear frustration at the bank." He mocked as he turned off the phone and dropped on the ground only to crash it on his feet. Nadira only stares amused. "My hands are slippery, I'm sorry."

Nadira stepped back in fear, she knew what was going to happen. The worst realization came through her mind. "Bruce...never tried to get the money on his own...isn't it...?" Hannibal stepped forward. "He never betrayed me...you lied...you...tricked me."

Hannibal smirked satisfied. "You actors are so great in pretending, but when someone lies to you..." He pushed the girl onto the ground suddenly. Nadira fell, the pavement scratched her back as she looked helplessly at the tall structure in front of her. "You can be easily convinced." He mocked. "You see, I needed Colin to suffer a natural heartbreak, as you did, not just a text i could send through your phone after I killed you. So manipulating you into doing it, was rather convincing." He explained carefully, Nadira tried helplessly to crawl but her back hit a dead end street. It was over.

"You...you killed Bruce..."She started to cry, her whole body was frozen, unable to move. All her courage, all her strentgh vanished away into that blissfull night. Her last night. "Please...I beg you..."She whimpered sobbing. "I-I won't tell anyone...please..."

"That's not what it seemed to be seconds ago." They both looked at the broken phone pieces on the pavement. Hannibal's bloody eyes and hidden nature blossomed while watching Nadira's skin glow by the moinlight. "I shouldn't delay myself. I need to have dinner and then fly back to Baltimore soon." He smiled as he pulled up his sleeves. "Thank you for your services, Miss Caddel. They won't be necessary anymore."

▫️

"I wasn't aware of your visit. May I ask the motive?"

"Can you please tell her I'm here? I'd like to-"

"No." Jack Crawford closed the door on the doctor's face at once.

Hannibal Lecter wouldn't give up yet, he knocked once again at the wooden structure, making the tired agent open it again.

"Please, Jack, i just want to talk to her." He asked as a teen recurring to a strict parent protectibg his daughter.

"She came back pretty scared last night. What happened between you two?"Jack asked with a serious face.

"I just want to speak to her, if you-"

"No." He was about to close the door again when Hannibal put his foot in the brief space between before closing it. "Dr.Lecter-"

"Just one word, just a glance, Jack, that's all I ask." Hannibal almost begged, my God, he missed her badly, it was almost as an absenve of a druge he was addicted to.

"Jack? What is going on?" A voice came from behind until popping behind her shoulder. "Hanni?" His ears shifted at the nickname, his eyes sparkle once he saw her there, behind the protective agent.

"Lissy-"

"Back off." Jack tried to close the door, Hannibal twitched his face in a mix of pain and annoyance.

"Jack!" Alice called him out. "Wait, let me just hear him."

"Then why did you come back yeterday pale as a ghost after seeing him?"

"It doesn't matter." She furrowed her eyebrows. "He is my fiancé, I want to speak to him."

"But-"

"Jack, I'm thankful for all you're doing, but you don't meed to worry." She tapped his shoulder. "You're not my father." That just broke his heart.

"I hope you know what you're doing." He opened the door, revealing Hannibal's full figure, holding a huge bouquet of sunflowers in a shiny ckear sky day. The agent left the two there.

Alice took in a deep breath. He wore her favorite shirt, that pink one, and the tie she gave have him, even his hair was brushed fown, giving a boy look like aspect. His expression was the most soft, fragile one with puppy eyes at her.

"Hello..." He replied in a timid tone, still mesmerized at her presence. He seemed so...shy, so speechless. What happened to his auspicious, authoritary presence from before? He always managed to confuse and amuse her at the same time. "I...I bought these for you." He standed the bouquet in her direction as an embarrassed teenager. "Your favorites."

"Thank you..." She grabbed the bouquet delicately, the touch of his hands immediatly caused her chills that she attempted to ignore.

There was a long pause in silence before Hannibal could gain enough courage to speak again.

"I know you are...upset with me." He muttered. "And you have the total reason to do so."

She didn't reply.

"I may have...overreacted...about your art." He looked down.

"Only that?" She kept a serious expression.

"I was awfully jealous about something ridiculously irrelevant." He looked at her, she still didn't change her stance. "I am sorry for destroying your canvas." She still srared at him. "And about saying all those things about your friend, Taye."

"And?"

He took in a deep breath. "...I should've never locked you inside our home."

"Now you do realize." She crossed her arms.

"You must understand, Lissy, you had just told me you wanted to leave me." He said helpless. "I became desperate...I...I don't know what to do without you." Hannibal took a step foward, his eyes were trembling, the hands hesitating to touch hers. "When you said about..." He gulped. "...taking a break...I...I felt the whole world crumble beneath my feet." She almost felt bad for seeing him that way. She never saw him so sad, so frustrated and desperate before. "And I helplessly tried to keep you. But instead, I've only scared and hurt you. And I despise myself for it."

She looked down for a moment, he semed like the same Hannibal she loved again, but for how long? He changed like the weather, she could never guess who she would wake up next to, or what his next step would be. But at the same time, her heart broke to see him there, at that front door, truly sorry for his mistakes.

"If you wish to take a break, or maybe to never see me again, I will respect your wishes." He kneeled on the ground in front of her, begging. "But I also can change for better, if you give us another chance."

Alice felt the whole world disappear, she could only focus on him. Change. Could she change Hannibal Lecter? Could that cold but also heartwarming man follow her wishes and become a better person? If only she knew who he truly was...

"You scared me." She finally said. "With Mason."

He exhaled heavily, his hand slowly reached for hers, carrying them gently in his. The touch was electrifying, suspending their breaths. It was almost as if they connected their souls again just by that gesture. "I am sorry...I was angry." He whispered. "I was mad that he brought you into this."

"What happened between you?" She asked,  her curiosity was killing her. Those secrets, those hints left in the air, everything without answers only to torture her.

"He is a maniac Lissy, there are often patients who offer risks, Mason is one of them."

"He almost killed you." She realized terrified.

"Did that scare you?"

She made a pause, deciding weather to open up her heart to him again or not.

"...Yes." She admitted, letting herself become vulnerable to that lovely monster again. "...I was scared... to lose you."

Hannibal softly kissed her palms, still kneeled on the ground, at her mercy. "You will never lose me, Lissy." His hazel eyes shined through the love in the air. "Give me a chance, my love." He whispered in a submissive attempt to bring her back.

Alice took in a deep breath. A chance. Just a chance and she could go back into his arms again. What about what Taye said? About just leaving and taking a break?

Why didn't she want that now...? Why all she wanted was there, in front of her?

Being honest to herself, Alice Mallory couldn't imagine her life without Hannibal anymore.

She'd give him a million chances if needed to have him by her side.

Even if that managed to burn everything around her and her own self.

She loved that man, loved that monster with each bloodcell of her body and each fragment of air that entered her lungs. The effect he had on her was inevitable, unforgettable and dangerous. But she couldn't deny it, she couldn't deny that he was the owner of her heart.

Alice slowly nodded shy. Hannibal parted her lips surprised. "I think...I think that maybe we can try it again..." He sighed in a trembling smile.

"Thank you... Oh, thank you, Lissy..." He got up fastly and hugged her tight. Just the sensation of his arms around her made her cry. She loved that man so much, loved as a vice. She couldn't escape him. And he loved that woman so much, she was the reason of his existence, the air he breathed, his religion. He could never leave her, never give up on her. He'd be by her side until the end of time...No matter what it takes "I love you so much."

"I missed you." She sofyly crued on his warm shoulder, her fingers gripping on his suit, her eyes closing at his comfortable presence. "I was...I was so sad to leave you...I missed you so much..." She mumbled. But she was home again now. "I love you Hanni."

▫️

She was back home. Safe. Snuggled into the sheets of his room, having a nice cup of warm tea as he took care of her.

2 days. It's been 2 days since she was there, but couldn't help but feel that void inside her. It seemed like all the pain, all the thoughts would come back again.

She recovered her phone, but Taye (well, Hannibal using his phone instead) ghosted her after texting her that he returned to Australia to take care of Nadira's parents. And she didn't receive any more messages, not even Colin's (none that she was aware or able to see, since they were deleted by her fiancé).

It was a thunderstorm of feelings and problems that made her whole body ache, unable to sleep properly without nightmares.

"Even his therapist thinks he did it." A voice spoke by her side on the bed. A voice she didn't hear for a long time. "Will does, Jack does, everybody actually." Bree Mallory crossed her arms with a smirk. "And yet you don't."

"Hannibal didn't do anything" Alice refused again, byt those intrusive, conspiratory thoughts would always resonate inside her mind.

"Kinda hard to believe after what he has done with that Mason guy"

"Mason...is a bad person." Alice tried to understand her lover. "He tried to kill us."

"And that justifies revenge?" Bree Mallory mocked as Alice avoided her flowery dressed picture. "Did you become a fan of violence since you've killed our father?"

"I didn't kill him, he was pratically already dead." Alice responded nervous, the teacup trembling in her hands. "You don't know shit. Get out of here."

"Is that a way to speak to your sister?" The ghost mocked.

"You're not my sister. Just a stupid image created by my fucked up head. Now, get out!" She growled as the illusion seemed to become sad at her gesture.

"Wow..." She nodded slowly lifting her eyebrows. "Maybe Colin was right....Hannibal really changed you." And, just with a blink of an eye, she disappeared.

Alice glanced at the door, listening to the peaceful sound of her troubled mind as the warmth of the room embraced her completely. That was it, their sanctuary, where she'd seek him for help and comfort whenever she felt sad, letting him treat all her injuries and take the pain away with his kisses and his devoted passion.

Now she hid in her melancholy, with that imeasurable pain that suffocated her little by little until she couldn't breathe. She just wanted it all to go away. Why couldn't she just have what she wanted?

He appeared gently as always, silent as a ghost, noticing her blank staring at the wall again with no reaction. Sat at the bed by her side, patient, caring as always. "Hello, darling. How are you feeling?" But she couldn't even answer him. She seemed in a trance, only staring at the wall over and over again. "Are you hungry?" She didn't reply. "I could prepare your favorite dessert." He tried to cheer her up but it was no use. It was like her thoughts were in another dimension, oblivious to everything else. He exhaled heavily, it broke him to see her so fragilized over the situation overall. Hannibal tried to move a bit closer, touching his shoulder against hers as his eyes followed her empty gaze. "What passes through your mind?"

"...Everything" She whispered without moving. "Everything went wrong, Colin, Katia, Will, even Taye gave up on me." She sighed. "Maybe this is the karma for everything I've done in my life...maybe a last gift from my father" She tried to blame herself.

"Alice, you've done nothing wrong." Hannibal reassured her.

"I am not a saint Hannibal." Her eyes were covered in tears. "I only hope God forgives me for whatever I've done."

His hand slowly touched her back, a smooth, delicate touch on her cold skin, like he touched something so pure, so holy like a cold porcelain material that he could almost shatter it into multiple pieces.

"Alice." He gently turned her chin to face him. The deep blue eyes filled with sadness meeting hers. "I don't see any failures in you. You're only...lightness, happiness, kindness..."He added gently. "All I've seen you do since we met, was you helping others, offering your best self even if they didn't deserve it, helping those you love."

"I failed." She interrupted him. "I failed to protect all of them, Hanni. Colin hates me.  Bree, Katia, even Freddie died. Taye got tired of me and left. And Will...he is...different." She shaked her head slowly. "I am not a saint, not a hero, I am just a stupid girl who thought she could help people and instead just messed up even more."

"Don't say that ever again." He gripped onto her shoulders. "You didn't fail someone."

"Who?"

"Me." He spoke with certainty as never before. "Alice, you...you are the best thing that has ever occured to me." He let it out. "Things didn't go the way you planned, people died, got hurt, but you still managed to survive, and even through all of this..." He gave a half smile. "Even through all the stones that were threw at me, you still stood up and shielded me with your wonderful smile." His thumb lightly stroke her cheek. "And I am so grateful for that, my darling."

"What if you're next?" She muttered in fear. "What if I'm a curse that will also catch upon you?"

"You're not a curse darling." Hannibal smirked sure of it. "You are a blessing." He cupped her face, her eyes sparkled at that man who adored her so much. "It's almost as if...the stars and the planets aligned, when we met for the first time." He could still savor the moment when he saw her at that museum. Backs turned to each other, the silence, the voices. "You and I ended up in the same room, at the same time." He sighed over her deadly beauty. "If that is a curse, then I want to be cursed by you over and over again, in each and every lifetime, Alice Mallory." Her lips trembled into a fragile smile as her chest blossomed into that sensation.

She giggled softly as he smiled, Alice softly touched his chest, feeling his heartbeat at her hands, like a vibration, a connection between them both. The world disappeared. "Do you think we can do this?" She whispered high into their passion. "Ignore every damn thing and just be with each other?"

That sent an eletric chain all over his body. "Would you like that?"

"...What if we don't need a break from each other?" Alice impulsively listened to her heart. "You can call me crazy but...what if we just...need to take a break from everyone?" She muttered, her eyes sparkled with that crazy idea that appeared into her heart "What if we just...disappeared?" She smiled, Hannibal almost gasped.

"Do you-"

"Let's leave this place." She held him tight. "Leave everything behind...just..." Her eyes met him in a begging, a soft whisper of surrender. "Run away with me."

He was in silence for a moment, almost unable to react of how she completed him perfectly, even their thoughts aligned. That was it. There was no doubt. He would be by that woman's side for eternity.

"Sorry, I know it's crazy, I-"

The gentle yet firm pull of his hands brought their lips together, interrupting her words but assuring her of the promise. Tender, sweet, dangerous and risky. That was their love, a bittersweet tragedy like adrenaline that pumped into their veins, leaving them breathless.

"There's a house..." He mumbled against her lips, kissing her over and over again, he couldn't believe it was possible but at that moment he was falling in love with her once again. He puffed trying to catcg some air and continue. "A property of mine...I planned to tell it later after our wedding but..." He chuckled softly, givibg a quick peck at her sweet lips. "It faces a cliffside far away from here-"

"...Yes." She replied in a genuine smile, unable to get enough from his love, the cheeks blushing, the blood pumping into her veins. "Yes, yes." She kissed his lips again, pressing them tight against each other. "I want it all with you." Hannibal almost couldn't breathe by how perfect everything seemed at the moment. She chose him, and only him. It was like a dream coming true. "I want you."

"And I want you, darling." He sighed as their lips met again filled with a desire combusted by their passion. "Only you."

The kisses became even more intense, thirsty and needy for each other. When she realized, she had threw her shirt across the room, the hands gently unbuttoned his pants, as her body was being laid gently on the bed.

She observed the man above her, his eyes filled with a devotion she almost couldn't understand. The way he made her feel...it was so surreal. He worshipped her as a goddess, valued every single trace of hers, loved each flaw, learned to listen and talk with so much patience and caring...he was everything to her. He was, after all, the answer to all her prayers, an angel on earth.

"Tonight." Hannibal breathed as their lips crashed onto each other, his hands wandered through her body. "We can meet at the bridge. The same bridge of our first kiss. Leave it all behind." He groaned with the smooth contact of her skin against his. "Let's not waste a single second anymore."

It was still surprising that all of this happened, but she couldn't help but feel extremely excited, her stomach filled with butterflies. "Deal." He pinned her arms softly and she smiled. "Looks like I've been waiting all my life for you." She chuckled shy as he grinned adorably.

"And you're the most delightful surprise that ever occured me." He tasted her sweet lips, letting her energy run through his veins.

"I love you, Hannibal." She didn't hesitate this time. That was her temple, her mural, her sky, her everything.

"I love you, Alice." He didn't hesitate this time. That was his muse, his religion, his universe, his existence.

It was a sweet, crimson scarlet feeling that rushed through that spin of dopamine, spairing into the air into small lies and bigger ones, aglomerating into that wonderful and painful sensation that took over them. It injured, killed, suffered, but they called it one emotion, a tender one that seemed to be the answer for what they felt. After all, only their love could hurt and heal like this.

▫️

It was still daytime when she woke up, the sunlight came through the small spaces between the curtains, thin yellow lines that glew on his soft and warm skin she touched as her own. The hair was messed, fluffy dark strands stuck to the pillow where he sunk his head. The eyes peacefully closed as a baby's ones, and one of the strong arms was still caringly set above her body.

Her fingers flickered through his strong face features, she was enchanted by each and every single aspect of that man who resembled a greek god. How could he be so perfect?

Alice smiled. Tonight. She'd leave it all behind to be with him. The person who understood her better than anyone else, who protected and cared for her better than anyone else. And she'd do the same to him. It was settled. She wanted not just to be his wife, she wanted to his soulmate, his one and only until the rest of her days.

Decided to reward him with a late breakfest in bed. Tried to deceive herself from his arm, the warm exposed chest was still aligned to hers and his seductive scent. Stepped into the cold floor and searched for her clothes. Just needed to find her shirt now, she was sure she threw it somewhere nearby...

Something soft touched her neck, warm, tickling, little noises of kisses as large hands held her waist. She grinned already surrended, giving up on the breakfest and cogitating the idea of returning to bed with him again.

Her blue eyes flickered at the white shirt that lifted up in front of her sight by his hand. He was faster than her this time. Alice smiled softly, his warm lips let out a whisper through her sensitive ears "Is this what you're looking for, miss?"

The heartbeat stopped instantly. Her vision blurred, as the voice became a thin steady line that almost ripped off her ears. The walls pressured her into a rigid position, shivering by the lack of clothing and the sentence that haunted her mind. The hand that she lifted to catch the shirt immeatly froze, unable to obey to her twisted and unstable brain. Any air inside her lungs disappeared as black magic.

"Is this what you're looking for, miss?" That voice repeated inside her soul, reverbering as a creepy church choir.

And yet, now it seemed clear as water, thick as blood. Plain and simple, they seemed...the same.

The pitch, the hoarse tone, the velvet, almost inaudible speech that waltz through his tongue through a sinful melody.

"Is this what you're looking for, miss?"

It was the same voice.

But it couldn't be. Her mind had to be deceiving her. Just the thought was overwhelming, how could her lover be the owner of an assassin's voice? Her sister's assassin even? No, that was impossible.

But even reassuring herself that it was impossible, that thought scared her.

The hands around her suddenly felt as if they burned her skin, her whole body was chilly, the teeth trembled, clenched in aprehension, almost breaking the white pearls in a suspense that killed her. "Lissy?" Hannibal continued to call, but it was like she was in another dark dimension of her own, she couldn't hear it any other way now. All she could hear was the same voice over and over, like someone pushed a lever inside her mind and now it couldn't be pulled back.

It wasn't him. She repeated to herself. It isn't him. But she couldn't help but feel out of breath, in a cardiac pain that almost made her faint. Swallowed dry, almost as if she ran away from a ghost, grabbed the shirt and left his arms, only to widen her eyes and paralyze as a scared little girl.

Her sister's murderer.

The Chesapeake Ripper.

Her lover.

The voices of others who tried to open her eyes took over her brain, as if they stabbed her for her ignorance and selfishness, and yet, she still desired to live through that veil of lies and tell herself that this was only a twisted thought of her tired brain.

"Is this what you're looking for, miss?" The voice behind Bree, the voice of the man who tore her sister apart apart and brutally comitted that carnage. She could almost see it coming from his lips.

She blinked her eyes three times, awakening from that horrifying visualization, only to face her concerned fiancé again.

"Alice, darling, are you okay?" He softly kissed her shoulders, she twitched her face holding the urge to scream. Her mind was divided in half. One part of it screamed he was a devil, the other that he was an angel. "Lissy..." He called her with that caring tone, but she could only listen to that voice on the phone again.

She avoided his touch and heard his soft chuckle behind her as she dressed up fastly, hiding her frightned expression from him. If she told him the truth, he would probably make her think otherwise, say that it was just the stress of her mind deceiving her. But somehow, deep inside her heart, she didn't want that answer. She wanted the truth. Her own truth. Deep inside, she knew he would hide that from her. "Feeling shy now?" He smirked at her adorable figure, reaching for her. His lips warmly touching her cheek, but she felt they burn as acid, corrupting it sourly. "It's still early, come back to bed." He whispered seductively as his hands slid down her waist.

She shut tight her eyes, begging to stop thinking of that insanity, but it didn't work. She could almost see it. Whenever he opened his mouth and spoke, she could see it, the image of Hannibal behind Bree at that small market's aisle.

"Is this what you're looking for, miss?"

She needed to leave. Leave as someone without air reaching the surface of a deep sea. She would collapse, faint if possible if she standed there any single second further in front of him.

"I-I need to go." She suddenly said, gaining courage to speak.

"What?" Hannibal found her tone slightly strange. "Why?"

"I...I promised I'd go see Bella..." Alice lied through he teeth, even though Hannibal would always know when she did that. "She doesn't seem very well."

"Is that so?" He didn't seem very convinced but still kept his fake neutral posture. "Would you like me to scort you?"

"No!" She suddenly shouted, just then realizing her prompt answer made him suspicious. "I-I mean...it'll probably take some time, I might come back only by night-"

"I'll see you at our spot then, we'll meet at midnight." He smiled sweetly, his eyes shined. "So we can leave tonight." Alice parted her lips in suprise. Leave. She couldn't even think about that now. She seemed so sure before, she still wanted to, but now...now she needed to understand what was happening. Not just leave. "Don't tell me you gave up on it already."

"I-I didn't...yeah, our spot, of course." She nodded nervous, realizing that she feared what his reaction would be if she refused. "So...I'll meet you there." She waved at him terrified but forcing a smile, walking towards the door.

"Wait." Hannibal called then, making her heels stop abruptely. Alice felt her heart reach her mouth and return to her chest fastly. She heard his steps and feared for what would come next. "Didn't you forget anything?" She turned to him slowly, noticing the peak of a smile in his narrowed lips.

"Did I?" She mumbled, paralyzed. Could have he noticed her change of posture? Perphaps her speech maybe? What would he do to her?

"Mhm." He nodded, Alice closed her eyes in fear, then, in a swift movement, he kissed her cheek in a sweet and fast moment. "Now you may go." He smiled adorably.

"Oh." She chuckled still in a pile of nerves as he grinned back. "Then...I'll leave now... Bye."

"See you later."

"Y-Yeah...see you later."

The first thing Alice did once she got out of that room, even if that was uncommon to her, was take the gun Will gifted her from behind her closet, the same spot where she left before. Somehow, she didn't feel safe anymore. And she was right about that.

She needed answers. And she would only achieve that through a main source.

The address wasn't hard to find, such a remarkable, well-known and retired psyachiatrist would certainly live somewhwere very...refined. Google gave it right away.

Alice speeded into advances to reach the truth and maybe clear that hell inside her mind.

▫️

"I must say that what I feel is a mixture of surprise, non amusement and also interest to receive you, Miss Mallory." The sophisticated blonde woman pronounced the words correctely in each clear pause, standing her arm towards the inside her home. "Please, come in."

The house, also office, of Bedelia Du Maurier was very elegant. Not as Hannibal's, she was rather minimalist, but never failing to set up a sophisticated decoration here and there. It suited her, discrete yet charming, but Alice Mallory couldn't even pay attention to those details at the moment. She was still horrified with her still unbelivable discovery.

"I don't have much time to loose." Alice said, sitting at the comfort velvet armchair in front of Bedelia's, unfortunetely reminding herself of her previous sessions with Hannibal. "It isn't Frederic Chilton." She said at once. The doctor didn't react. "The Chesapeake Ripper."

"So you've heard his voice." Bedelia said smoothly. "You seem troubled by that fact."

"Cut the small talk, Dr.Du Maurier. You know why I'm here."

"I'm afraid to say that my crystal ball isn't giving me any hints, so I must ask you to elaborate yourself, Miss Mallory." She teased.

"You said Hannibal isn't who he is. That he is dangerous. What kind of danger were you speaking of?"

"I already told you, influence can be deceiving."

"You said that I couldn't recognize the Chesapeake Ripper's voice due to his influence." Alice held her breath. "Why would Hannibal not want me to recognize it?"

"What do you think?"

"...He allegdly said that it's not to awaken my trauma." Alice muttered.

"Alledgedly." Bedelia repeated with a perfect pronunciation "Something tells me you don't believe in that theory."

"It's just a feeling about it. Perphaps a mistaken one." She crossed her arms, as if she involved herself in a shield. "Maybe I did believe in what he said before but...it just doesn't seem right."

"Why doesn't it seem right, Miss Mallory?" Bedelia listented attentive.

"Whenever the FBI tries to find this killer, something happens. And Hannibal just...wraps me inside this bubble of love..I mean it isn't bad, but sometimes it's just..."

"Too much." Bedelia completed, Alice nodded.

"Since what happened with Beverly Katz it just felt like something was...off." She squinted her eyes. "And then there's Will."

"You mean Will Graham? What about him?"

"His...delusional warnings..murder attempts...all of it towards Hannibal." She looked down at her feet. "And he managed to convince Jack, Alana, Freddie, Katia..."

Bedelia crossed her legs, resting her arms above her lap calmly. "Something brought you here, Miss Mallory." She established. "Through all this time you ignored, shut down any signs against your fiancé, but now something snapped inside your brain, didn't it?" She guessed correctely through her analysis. "What was it?"

Alice curled up her toes, held tight to the armchair's fabric, the knuckles became white. "I feel like...I'm scared to say it out loud."

"You're afraid it'll become true if you do it."

"Something tells me it is true." She stared blankly on the floor. "And I'd rather die than to admit that it's true."

Bedelia leaned forward, prompt to listen to that woman's downfall. "Is it related to the voice?" She induced her. "You recognized it isn't Chilton's...did it lead you to any other clue?"

"I-I've heard it from his mouth..."She swallowed the tears, her body trembled in weakness.

"Whose mouth, Miss Mallory?"

Her vision became blurred by the tears, she pressed her lips trying not to violently sob through her misery. "Han...Hannibal's.."She let it out into a hitched whisper. "His voice...it's the same...as the ripper's..."

"That means..."

Alice shaked her head. "No." She refused. "He wouldn't do this to me. Hannibal would never do this to me."

"I am not telling what he would do or did, miss Mallory." Bedelia reassured. "You are." Alice's nails dove into the seat's arms. "And what you are saying..."

"That means...that means he killed...Bree...?" She gasped into the tears. Bedelia offered her some tissues but Alice didn't even bother. "No!....No...this is wrong...I am...this is ridiculous..." She shaked her head. "He would've..would've killed so many...framed Will...I...no, this can't be..."

"Again, you're the one who's saying it, Miss Mallory."

"No, I...I need proof." She suddenly stood up at once. Bedelia only followed her with her gaze. "I can't just blame Hannibal by some sort of...delusion of my mind."

"So you're eager to find it? The truth?"

Alice took a deep breath and stared at the green vegetation by the window, wich seemed peaceful and relaxing, a complete contrast of what she felt. Her soul burned.

"It feels like I'm betrayling him."

"To reach for the truth can be a painful and difficult journey. But some may say that nothing is as...humanly relieving as honesty." The sun haired doctor analyzed the broken woman. "Others may say that ignorance is a gift to achieve real happiness." Her gaze switched from the woman towads the door. "Be aware of your choice, Miss Mallory, because it is a fact: once the truth is out, it rots as a corpse, and it stinks." Bedelia concluded. "You will never get rid of the smell."

▫️

"I want the files." She abruptely emerged at his office in loud heel noises on the recently clean solid floor. "The files from all the recent cases related to the Ripper, since my sister's death."

Jack suddenly paralyzed. His gaze met hers in an unspoken language. "Why?"

"I need the files, Jack." Alice insisted, not willing to say the reason yet. "Bree, Katz, Katia, all of them." She described. "Please don't ask any questions."

Jack got up from his desk in his dark suit. "What happened?" He asked concerned for that girl. He could see it, see how damaged and scares she was, how hurt she seemed by her dilatated and red eyes. Something frightned her. "Is this about Ha-"

"The files, please." She insisted once again, closing her fists to keep herself not to cry again.

The agent kept his gaze for a solid minute but realizing it wouldn't work, he let out a sigh. "I think we both know the reason, isn't it?" Alice didn't say a word. "Gotta show you something first. Follow me."

Without any choice, she followed the agent until a basement, another room for some temporary inmates, but with some privileges. He opened up the door, but before they could enter, he stopped on his feet.

"I'll show you the files, kid." He told her. "But you gotta be strong for that." He then turned to the room. "Your best friend is here for tea time." He indicated for Alice to enter. "Don't talk too much. She's sneaky."

Alice confused herself by what he meant but her jaw dropped at the realization of what it really was. Or better, who.

"Looks who it is." A smile crossed the redhaired woman's lips. "A little bird told me you didn't got to my funeral, I must say, I was quite disappointed."

"...Freddie..." Alice gasped in schock. At the sarcastic red headed vision. "You're....you're alive...?"

"I'll leave you to it." Jack left, delicately closing the door behind Alice.

"No, I'm not alive, this is my ghost talking." Freddie mocked. "Of course, I'm alive." The reporter rolled her eyes. "And I-" Her speech was interrupted by a tight, sudden hug from Alice's wide open arms and fresh tears that soaked the journalist's turquoise blazer. "...okay that is weird. Stop." Freddie muttered but, discretely, gave a small smile in grattitude. Someone had missed her after all.

Alice pushed away fastly, cleaning up her tears. "How? They...people are saying Will killed you-"

"And that's exactly what they need to think." Freddie replied confidently. "That's what Hannibal Lecter needs to think." Her blue eyes stared into Alice's ones. "And something tells me you already know that."

"...You faked your death?"

"Will Graham faked a murder." Freddie smirked. "Did he dine with Hannibal recently? What did my 'meat' taste like?"

"You're saying..." Alice widened her eyes in horror.

"He gained his trust. You know that." She confessed. "But you know deep inside Will Graham doesn't trust Hannibal Lecter."

"Neither does Jack and you then."

"If you're here we're all in the same boat."  Freddie leaned fowaed intrigued. "What made you open your eyes?"

"Nothing." She lied. "I don't believe in you."

"Do you really think I'd fake my death for a false lead, Mallory?" Freddie snorted in mockery. The small lightning from the room falling into lines across her pale skin.

"I know you'd do anything for a good story and well paid money."

"Come on, you're better than that." She shaked her head. "Deep inside you know it."

"Know what?"

"Hannibal Lecter is the Chesapeake Ripper. And Will Graham is going to catch him...well, maybe not Graham. Jack Crawford."

"Why not Will?

"I told you. Besides their clear equal taste for women..." Her eyes scanned down her figure in a short smirk. "...their criminal minds are very much similar." Freddie tilted her head. "Will wouldn't catch someone who thinks like him, who understands him."

"Then why is he helping Jack?"

"He wants the truth out. Don't you as well?" Alice paralyzed. "That's why you came here."

"What if you're wrong?" She replied instead. "Arresting an innocent man, does that feel righteous to you?"

"The evidence doesn't lie." Freddie said determined. "Look around, his traces are everywhere. And when I say traces, I mean victims." Freddie looked down for a moment, crossing her narrowed arms. "I know the news are...cruel...due to your relationship with him and what happened to your sister, but-"

"But what?" Alice looked at her offended. "What do you want? For me to just...arrest him? Based on what? Your opinions?"

Freddie sensed something else in that speech. "You don't want to arrest him because of the proof...or because you don't want to...?" She gave a step back. "Oh my God...his manipulations are indeed beyond what I thought....you are willing to forgive-"

"You don't know if that's the truth." Alice took a deep breath. " I promise you Freddie. I will do whatever it takes to catch my sister's killer, don't you ever underestimate me."

Freddie nodded with a grin. "Even if that means arresting Hannibal Lecter?"

She took a moment to answer. "I said: whatever it takes."

▫️

The files were like from a movie's. The images almost made her vomit, horrified by the death and blood, the carnage displayed cruelly in front of her. Jack was afraid she wouldn't be able to handle it.

Alice took a deep breath and started her search. "Beverly Katz...any signs of who killed her?"

"Only that it was the muralist's partner. Beverly must've discovered something." Jack commented, relying his back on the wall behind her, looking over her shoulder. "Why do you want to know about her?"

Katz disappeared the day Alice talked to her. When she helped her find something. When she asked for her number and seemed extremely concerned about something. She was going to warn her...about what?

Hannibal also didn't want Alice close to that case.

"Katia" She gulped in aprehension as the doubts grew up more and more inside her. "You found her at Chilton's house. The Chesapeake Ripper's home, along with many others bodies."

"Miriam Lass affirms he is the ripper." Jack nodded. "And true, he fits the profile. But Katia Rojas body was dead before it arrived in Chilton's home. Probably on her path to work."

"But they found her DNA on her nails."

"A scratch. Could be planted. His face coould've also been scratched by an object."

"You think someone framed him...?" Alice lifted her sight to the agent. Jack tried his best not to traumatize her even more. "But Miriam Lass-"

"Lass spent 2 years locked in an unknown location by an unknown person who clearly brainwashed her. All of her speech is unstable and not trustful as a source." Jack explained fastly.

"So what you have on Chilton..."

"Is unsure evidence." He spoke. "Did you hear the audios in the pen drive?" Alice hesitated but nodded. "What do you think?"

"Why is my feedback important?" She frowned her eyebrows. "I could be a failure as a source just as Miriam Lass."

"You're still pretty much sane, Alice." Jack touched her shoulder, it was comforting, yet not enough to get rid of the ghosts that haunted her. "Your opinion is very credited."

She didn't reply. Instead her hands reached for the last file. The typed letters on the beige folder made her almost have a heart attack. She became dizzy.

"Bree was killed by the Ripper. Is that really certain?"

"From what Will concluded, Hobbs' copycat and the Chesapeake Ripper are the same." Jack noticed her sudden fragility to speak about the subject.

"How much can I trust Will's opinion?" She stared at the folder unable to open it.

"You were the one who asked for it, didn't you?" Alice continued silent. "How much do you trust it?"

Her fingers flickered at the edges of the file, slowly opening it, the eyes teared at the horror she tried to erase, now back again.

"If you don't want to see it-"

"What is Will's theory?" She suddenly said. "About who killed her?" Alice looked at her sister's bloody and disfigured body laid on the crime scene's ground. "What was the motivation?"

Jack relied his back on the wall again, knowing she wouldn't take it very well. "According to Will, Bree caught the ripper in some sort of parallel murder. He was killing someone and she probably took a picture, a video, or something to reach for the police."

"...But he caught her before she could do it." Jack nodded as Alice completed his thoughts.

"What Will concluded from the trajectory is that she tried to deceive him by entering a market, she bought the milk, called you-"

"And he was just behind her." Her eyes stopped at the door, almost as if she could see her sister there, holding the phone again, as a man standed behind her. "Reassuring his presence in a subtle mockery." The voice came clear to her mind. Alice was in some sort of trance and the figure behind Bree shaped itself into an elegant man, a tall one, with large shoulders and a distinctive voice she recognized. "He said: is this what you're looking for, miss?" She made a pause, watching Hannibal with a devilish murder smile behind her sister. "She tried to warn me." She could see the brunette trying to speak to her on the phone. "Used a codenm name so he wouldn't understand. So he wouldn't try to come after me. My little bee." She observed as Bree walked out and Hannibal followed her. "But she couldn't save herself." Bree reached the alley, Hannibal took off the knife from the previous body he mutilated and used on her instead, intiating a bloody carnage that would change their destinies forever. "He took her phone, pretended she was still alive by answering my text, and left with it." Alice could still picture her sister's body lying on the ground helpless, with a red pool beneath her. "While Bree was dead."

Jack listened to her attentive and could notice how she spaced out, almost traveling to another state of mind until she came back, staring back at her hands, reassuring herself that everything was real.

"I need to arrest him, Alice. You know that, right?" Jack whispered, as her eyes filled with tears.

"He never tried to help me recognize the voice..." Her voice was disturbed by the tears... the hands standed opened on the desk. "He tried to deceive me." She tried to hold the urge to scream, covered her mouth with her hands, muffling the sound of her own voice. "Anyone near the truth was taken away from me...Will was framed...Katz and Katia were killed..." Her mind snapped. Her whole body shivered, her spine was still rigid, the toes curled horrified, and her heart bleeded, almost forming an ocean inside her. "I was protected in every single way and aspect favorable to him...immersed into this...beautiful lie as he...he..."

"Alice-"

"I recognized his voice." She confessed. Jack widened his eyes, frozen. "I recognized his voice...and it just popped out of nowhere, the same sentence, different meaning, but the same voice." Her whisper came out hoarse, weak like she struggled to breathe. A bitter smile crossed painfully her lips. "I looked so hard for it...tried to recall it like a stupid, and just like that, just now, I did it." Her teeth clenched together. "It's his voice." She assured to herself the worst thing she could ever think about. "It is Hannibal. It has always been him."

Jack exhaled heavily. That was it. She knew. And worse, all their suspicions were confirmed. It was done. Hannibal was the ripper. The cannibal they feared that had made his way into the FBI and fooled everyone. It was him, the man who stole Alice's heart and trust, now, the killer of her sister and friends.

And it broke the agent's soul to see that sparkling, joyful woman, now so sad, destroyed that way. It was like someone stabbed, brutally murdered in front of him, and she bleeded, bleeded in heavy tears and sobs that shaked her body into a collapsing melancholy that killed her.

"I am sorry, Alice-" He tried to reach for her,  and instead, she hugged him tight, tight enough that she could feel her body trembling. Her voice became groans and sobs, so hoarse that he thought she would pass out. "I'm so sorry, kid.."Jack muttered as he held her for a moment.

After a while he managed to ease her a bit and let her sit back on the chair. He adjusted his coat, now soaked by her tears, and declared. "I hate to leave you here like this, but I need to go."

"Where?" Alice glanced at the man, his posture was quite nervous, agitated. She could feel it already. "Don't tell me-"

"I'm having dinner with the devil. Not gonna eat any meat of course." The idea made Alice's stomach twist inside her.

She got up from the desk, and standed in front of the agent, looking deeply into his brown caring eyes. She knew it wasn't just a dinner. She knew there was something else.

"You're going to kill him" She guessed it, now shutting down the tears and keeping a somber tone.

"Are you going to stop me from doing it?" He whispered back, knowing that her love for Hannibal wouldn't simply die in a matter of minutes.

Alice took a moment to answer, the eyelids touching delicately the crystalline shield in her eyes, almost breaking it. "I don't know." She whispered staring blankly at the floor, the expression as someone who already was out of their mind.

The agent's large hand touched her shoulder in a fatherly mannerism, concerned about that girl's scars she carried inside her soul. If she could make out of all that alive, he would be certain that no one was as strong as her.

"Stay here." He muttered gently. "I'm gonna deal with this.".

He let her go and walked away, until Alice abruptely said "What about Will?"

Jack stopped. "What about him?"

"Is he going to kill him?"

Jack thought for a moment. "I trust him to do what needs to be done when time arrives."

"I bet you do." Alice sighed, staring at her narrowed and weak fingers. "And so does Hannibal." She whispered inaudible for him to listen. Jack walked away, setting his fate.

And Alice didn't follow his advice.

▫️

"I don't know what to tell you." Her voice came out weak as she stared at the grey gravestone into the quiet garden of buried loved ones. "Being sorry will never be enough." Alice shaked her head staring at the name entitled on the stone. "Because I know that you can see through me, Bree." The chilly morbid breeze rushed through her hair in that isolated graveyard, speaking with the dead. "You can see that..."She gulped, trying to use that defensive system of holding back her emotions again just like in the past. "...I still care for him." She closed tight her hands, almost cutting her hands with her fingernails.  "And I hate that." She shut her eyelids. "I hate...I hate myself for all of this...for being so stupid...so blind.." she shaked her head, pursing her lips. "...for hurting you this way...for allowing myself to let him enter my life...for..." she sighed heavily. "For even as insane and inappropriate as it seems, to still wonder if he ever loved me at all." The blue sunk into the grass beneath her feet. "I should've died in your place, Bree." Her knees failed and fell onto the ground, her hands gripped onto the soil, a tear fell with guiltiness. "This is so unfair." She groaned to the skies, challenging her faith. "Why did you have to die?!" She screamed at the tomb.

No one answered. Not even the ghost that followed her. Alice Mallory realized, kneeled on that dirty ground, facing her sister's tomb and the truth finally out, that she was alone. There was no prince charming to save her, no councelor to help her. There was only a villain who played her as a pawn.

How could Bree forgive her? How could God forgive her? Alice couldn't even forgive herself.

Her friends' blood ran through her hands. Hannibal wasn't the only one to blame. Her chosen ignorance, her selfishness...She was the one who deserved to have died.

Her hands trembled into her purse, creepily taking the cold metal into her hands, gulping in advanced fear, lifting the device towards her head, touching it against her skull. Prepared the gun, letting it end it all, take all the pain away.

But that sweet and sad glance interrupted her. The flowery image she tried to avoid, now back, staring into her eyes intensely, almost taking control of her soul by doing it.

They were hidden beneath a bed. The mold entering their lungs and making them cough discretely not to be caught. She tapped her younger sister's mouth and told her to be quiet. "Bree, you need to be silent."

"Why, Ali?" She stared into her eyes confused and sad. "I wanna leave."

"It's a game." She lied for her own good. "Come on, hide-and-seek, if you win until I say it's done, I'll get you some candy."

"Really?" She smiled brightly into the misery.

"Really." Alice suddenly shifted her stance and heard the footsteps from afar. "Now, be quiet or you'll loose."

The girls silenced at once, watching as the heavy steps of their somber and drunk father figure approached. The dirty black boots in front of their sight as Alice kept her sister close, shielding her with her arms until the iminent danger was gone and they could finally breathe.

"Okay, it's over now." She whispered to her sister.

"Did I win?" The younger asked.

"Yeah, yeah you won, good job Bree." Alice let out a half weak smile.

"Yay!!" The girl clapped innocently into that chaos.

That's when Alice knew. She would protect her forever.

The cold metal piece fell from the ground unable to fullfill its purpose as she let out a  deep groan of desolation, the hands sinking into the ground again as the tears washed the grass as rain.

If she needed to honor Bree's death, her own wouldn't be the way to do it. No, she needed to endure that hell.

And bring her justice.

Alice stared at the shining ring on her finger, the red jewell reflecting her image in a bloody reminder of their promises. It was horrible. Horrible to feel that bittersweet sensation inside of her. Feeling like a fool in his game and wishing him the worse...but also the best.

Hannibal hurt but at the same time healed her soul and there wasn't any way she could get rid of that golden scar he left on her heart.

"Tonight. We can meet at the bridge. The same bridge of our first kiss. Leave it all behind." She recalled his words and the choice she had to make.

Alice Mallory knew what to do.