"Sirius?" I yelled up as I buzzed for him again and was met with the same silence as before. I could see that his window was open and sound travelled around his flat so I was sure he could hear me, "Sirius, let me in!"

"Hey Dorcas!" James's head popped out of the window and I was a little annoyed. I'd been trying to call Sirius for two days now and he's here inviting James round to hang out? This was not on.

"Can you let me in? I'm worried about Sirius!" I yelled back.

"Can you come in a half hour or so? We're not ready for you."

"James Potter, you let me in now before I break the door in!" I shouted and his head quickly dissapeared. I began to storm away before I heard the door buzzing and hurried up towards Sirius's flat.

The door was already open when I arrived, so I wandered in to see both boys sitting on the floor of the living room surrounded by papers. Sirius looked wild and excited by something in a way that suggested he hadn't slept for days.

"Sirius, are you okay? When was the last time you went to bed?..." I asked not wanting to get too close to him just in case he was very sleep deprived.

"Dorcas, I have never been better because for the first time in a while, I have something that I want. You know how James has been chasing Lily since she started working at the cafe and I used to tease him about it? Well, I get it now. Remus didn't want me and it's made me want him even more..."

"That didn't answer my original question, Sirius, it just raised even more." I said in a concerned tone.

"I slept recently, I'm just filled with childish excitement, okay?" He said impatiently, "Me and James came up with a great name too..."

They both looked at me excitedly but I set my expectations low.

"Go on..." I said, raising an eyebrow at them as they bickered about who should say it first. I was amazed by them sometimes, around people they wanted to sleep with they were mature and classy gentlemen. Around me, they seemed like slightly annoying younger brothers who were always scheming and plotting things that were doomed to fail.

"Bone the lone wolf!"

"NO." I said instantly, not even having to process the name to realise how awful it was, "I'm sorry but I'm vetoing that name. It's not even a good rhyme, it's just very clumsy. It's worse than Code Redhead!"

"Well, what do you suggest we call it then?" James said looking a little annoyed at my rejection of his names.

"How about we skip names and just move onto you telling me the scheme and me telling you why it's doomed to fail?" I said, flashing him a fake grin and attempting to telepathically get him to move along.

"That's hurtful, Dorcas, it's not a scheme but I'll look past that." He said, his excitement fading to a glimmer in his eye as he switched to serious Sirius mode, "Okay, so I have decided that I am going to seduce Remus which is why bone the lone wolf was the PERFECT name - "

"It's still banned," I cut in, ending his mini protest before it could get started, "Go on."

"- Fine! He didn't like the confident me who got his number so I've decided that I need a second chance which is why I have decided that I am not going to be me. I'm going to be Regulus. Technically he's my younger brother but Remus doesn't know that. I'm going to tell him that I am Sirius's identical twin. I grew up with Regulus so I should easily be able to adopt his quiet, serious personality quite easily. Remus may not like me but I'm sure he'll like Regulus and then and only then will I get to - "

"Don't say it," I pleaded. Sirius and James gave me those stupid puppy eyes and I was a sucker for that. "Fine, but this is the last time." I relented, cursing my weak will.

"- Bone the lone wolf." Sirius finished, "Woah, that felt good to say. So what do you think?"

"I think it sounds a little - " I had no idea what to say next, stalkery? Obsessive? Their plan was all kinds of awful, "Catfish-y but like a real life version. I don't think Remus will like it."

"It's technically not catfishing if it's for love, right?" Sirius said, flashing me what I assumed was a charming grin but given the situation, it just looked a little perverted.

"Sirius, that makes it worse."

"Dorcas, can you just be on my side for once?" He said frustratedly, "Anyway, that's not the end of it... but first you need to agree to be a part of it."

I rolled my eyes, how did I not see this coming? Of course they'd find a way to involve me in their convoluted and doomed to fail scheme. Part of me wanted to leave and let them fail on their own but I was intrigued now and I knew that no matter what, they'd find a way to get me to do stuff anyway. I might always surrender to their scheme now.

"Fine, but I am allowed to back out at anytime if it endangers my life or I just change my mind. You remember your last "masterplan" to steal some guys yacht for an epic new years I'd never forget? James broke his wrist, you ditched us for some random guys you met a sports bar and I almost drowned in a fishing net." I reminded them.

"You have to admit it's a night you'll never forget." James grinned at me which I returned with a scowl.

"He's right, we never said it would be the good kind of unforgettable. But fine, I accept your terms. " He said, as I did a mini fist pump to celebrate this minor victory, "I can't meet him at the café again, he didn't like that so I guess I need to meet him elsewhere but right now I don't know anything about him so I'll need you to scout ahead and find out his favourite bookstore or something. Don't worry though, James and I will be keeping an eye on you the whole time."

"That makes it so much better, thank you." I said as dryly and sarcastically as I could.

"Are you in?" Sirius asked earnestly.

"Yes I am, but can I just say something? Do you guys really not see the problems with it? Firstly, I doubt he'll fall for this dumb twin idea anyway, he doesn't seem to be a stupid guy. And secondly, if by some miracle he does, when will you tell him if at all? Will you continue to be Regulus forever? What if the real Regulus comes to visit?"

"Woah, who said anything about forever? I'm just trying to sleep with him, honestly, Dorcas." He said although I could tell from his laugh that this was more than that.

"Seems like an awful lot of effort to sleep with somebody, just saying." I said, catching him off guard for a second before he resumed a casual, aloof expression.

"Yeah, well he's hot and dodged my advances with skill and wit, it's a deadly combo for any man. Just ask James."

"I can confirm that's true, Lily's sass is what attracted me to her in the first place. She says she hates me but for somebody who hates me she sure does spend an awful lot of her shift talking to me..." James said, his eyes suddenly misting over as they always did when we got on the topic of Lily.

"I think she likes you, maybe you should just ask her out in a sincere way? I'm sure she'd be so surprised that the overconfident James Potter actually had a human side to him." I teased making James shift uncomfortably in his chair, "Anyway, back to plan... bone the lone wolf - "

"You said it!" Sirius said, clapping his hands.

"It took all my effort to say it and I don't think I'll ever forgive myself." I said, wrinkling my face into a disgusted expression, "Anyway, let's get this crazy, creepy plan on the go!"

"Team bone the lone wolf!" James said, putting his hand in the middle.

"Nope, not doing that." I said folding my arms as they stood there expectantly. They gave me the puppy dog eyes again and I made a silent promise to myself to improve my self restraint as I walked over.

Whether I liked it or not, I was now deeply entangled in Sirius's scheme and there was no getting out of it.

•••

Hey guys, hope you enjoyed the second chapter, it's made me want to write a spin off about the night of new years now but maybe another time. If you liked it, please consider leaving a vote or a comment! - E x