"I'm sorry about the set up, by the way." James said as we poured popcorn into a bowl in preparation for our movie day. Since the triple date we'd all been in a bit busy so I hadn't seen my two crazy best friends for almost a week so it was nice to hang out

"Nah, don't worry about it, wasn't your fault."

"Is Peter still trying to talk to you?"

"Luckily no, I was quite up front with him about not being into him. I was quite blunt about it and he gave up after that."

"Sirius should take a page out of your book when it comes to honesty."

"Honesty is the best policy which makes it even weirder that I'm helping him with the biggest lie of the century. I didn't want to lead Peter on, he didn't seem bad but he just wasn't really my type." I said with a laugh.

"What because he's a guy?" James teased, "Should have brought Marlene along instead, Lily mentioned she might not be entirely straight even though she did get off with Sirius."

"I've been known to like a few guys here and there but Peter was too short and too jumpy and I just didn't find him attractive." We walked out of the kitchen, desperately trying to balance the lemonade and popcorn between us, "But if you're serious about Marlene then please do give me her number, she is stunning. It's the least you two idiots could do considering how much I've helped you over the past few months."

"I'll see what I can do." James grinned as we sat down next to Sirius, careful not to spill anything and invoke his wrath.

"You two ready?" Sirius said vaguely as we sat down although he looked a little dazed, like he hadn't quite noticed our presence. Sirius was surprisingly quiet whilst we watched, usually he'd make a comment every few seconds about the hot guys or to complain and pause it to discuss some random plot hole. I wasn't going to complain though, it was nice to watch a film uninterrupted for once.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it!" Sirius said suddenly which was a bit annoying considering we were just getting to the good part of the crappy film we were watching. Me and James exchanged a look and mutually agreed to ignore him. We should have learnt by now that a troubled Sirius as he would make himself known. With a quick sharp gesture, he reached across me and James and grabbed the remote, pausing our film.

"Padfoot, why did you do that?!" James asked, raising his hands in irritation.

"Guys, I have a problem." He looked genuinely troubled and exasperated so we decided to listen, "I don't just want to sleep with Remus now. Before it was that but I think I'm actually falling for him and I think I want to be with him.... but not as Regulus."

"Little bit of a problem there, he likes Regulus not Sirius and I don't think he'll be happy if he finds out." I pointed out, "And can I just say that I totally pointed this out." I gave him a small triumphant smile and he scowled in response.

"I know you did, Dorcas, please don't rub it in!" Sirius said putting his head in his hands.

"I'm not making any promises..." What good was being right about something if you couldn't rub it in?

"He hates Sirius and he'll hate him even more if he finds out I lied." Sirius said.

"That's not true... how about you slowly become more and more like Sirius until one day you're just like 'Hey! The guy you've liked hanging out with is actually Sirius not that dork, Regulus!' I think that could work." James said.

"Yeah, that's true or I could arrange for Sirius to meet him again in secret and then he can date both and pick one in some dramatic choosing thing."

"Oh yeah or..." James continued, sitting up excitedly.

"Are you both absolutely mental?" I asked looking between them, astonished by their stupidity when it came to this.

"No, we're trying to sort out this problem actually." Sirius said with a smirk.

"Well you're doing it poorly. Think about, Remus probably won't be too happy if he finds out you were essentially catfishing him, right?" I said slowly so that maybe the two idiots would take it in.

"I don't know, if he realises it was for love then..." Sirius began.

"Sirius, for the last time, that makes it WORSE!" I said although Sirius didn't look convinced, "SO if he doesn't like lying, then he's not going to be happy that in the process of stopping lying to him, you lied even more chances are he'd be even angrier. Also that choosing plan has so, SO many flaws, I don't even know where to begin. Like are you forgetting that the Regulus you made doesn't exist? How is he meant to be choosing one of you, if only one of you could be there at a time?!"

"It was only a suggestion, Dorcas!" Sirius said.

"What do you suggest?" James asked.

"If you really like him, then maybe consider being honest with him. It's going to be an awful conversation, I know that. There's no easy way to explain why you've been catfishing him but in the long run he'd probably be more annoyed if you did yet another elaborate lie to try and convince him."

"Oh god, this is going to go SO badly." Sirius leant back, putting his face in his hands, "He'll probably never talk to me again, I wish I'd never done this stupid Bone the Lone Wolf scheme."

"I did try and stop you." I pointed out.

"And I... should have listened to you!" He moped.

I was slightly tempted just to sit back and watch Sirius try and wiggle his way out of his mess on his own but I would have felt bad and at the end of the day, I was annoyingly involved in this plan anyway so I might as well see it through.

"Don't worry, Sirius, we'll help you plan it out so we can end this dumb scheme once and for all." I said after a long, tense silence.

"Yeah, don't worry about it Padfoot. Well, I mean you probably should worry about it a bit but we'll help." James added.

"How about you just try and make it casual, invite him over for a film or something, me and James can hide in one of the rooms and text you or something."

"No." Sirius said surprisingly, "I think I should be there with just him. If he found out you're in the room, he'd probably be more upset. Also you guys would probably react really loudly to everything and he'd hear you, the doors aren't that thick."

"That's actually a very good point," I said, "I'm surprised it came from you."

"Hey!" Sirius said although he had a proud grin on his face.

"Okay, so maybe you just watch a movie or something and just slowly try and broach the topic.... Oh god, this is going to be so awkward."

"You're telling me." Sirius said.

"Maybe get him a little drunk first. He might be more receptive." James said, "Like tipsy enough that he might be more okay with it but not so drunk that's he slurring his words and ends up passing out on your sofa."

"Okay, so far we have casual evening and slightly tipsy. This is good, he might actually still be able to talk to me after this..." Sirius said although he still looked quite awkward about it. It was hard to feel too sorry for him when he'd got himself into this mess.

"Maybe just be like 'Remus, I have a confession. I'm not Regulus... I'm actually Sirius'. You know just casually slip it in." James suggested.

"No, that's too direct, he'll hate me and he'll be confused. Or maybe he'd laugh. Oh god, I don't know what's worse." Sirius said.

"Okay, maybe you watch a film that makes catfishing look good." I said desperately. I thought that planning an awesome party in 24 hours had been hard, compared to this it was nothing.

"Yeah, like Mrs Doubtfire." James suggested.

"So on our date I'll just casually bring him in and be like, 'Hey Remus, so glad you could make it, do you fancy some wine and watching Mrs Doubtfire with me, it will be so bloody romantic!". It's going to be so weird."

"To be fair, this is an unusual and weird situation and the date isn't meant to be romantic. It has a specific purpose and Mrs Doubtfire would serve that purpose." Sirius looked completely unconvinced, "Well you think of another movie that makes catfishing look romantic or even remotely acceptable!"

Sirius thought about this hard for a second, opened his mouth as if to speak before realising whatever movie he'd just thought of was actually stupid and closed it again.

"See, you can't think of another one!" I exclaimed.

"I'm sure there's a better one..." Sirius said, his face screwed up in thought.

"What could be better than Mrs Doubtfire?" James said in an innocent voice, "Remus will definitely want to sleep with you after a few hours of Robin Williams in drag."

"Shut up, Prongs." Sirius said although he was smirking slightly.

"It will at least make your scam look a little less weird." I said.

"Fine," Sirius said sulkily, "We can watch it although I still don't think it's the ideal date film."

"Okay so after he's drunk and sees lying and disguises as a sweet thing, that's when you tell him. Try and emphasise that you only did it because you liked him so much and there's a small chance he'll think it's sweet."

"Hopefully he'll also realise that Sirius has the same face has Regulus so if he was attracted to one, he'll probably think the other one is hot too." James said.

"Yeah, you've got that going for you!" I said, "Just make sure you're extra hot for the date then."

"Guys, I'm already extra hot." Sirius smirked, "I don't know what more I can improve on."

"Okay, so wine, hotness and a film that makes pretending to be someone else look okay and not weirdly creepy. There's a very small chance this might actually work." James said.

"Emphasis on small chance." I said.

"Come on, Dorcas, you didn't believe Bone the Lone Wolf could work and it was actually weirdly successful." Sirius pointed out.

"That's true but compared to our very lame plan of how to tell him, Bone the Lone Wolf looks like the most well thought out plan ever." I said, "But it's better than nothing."

"Do you think he'll hate me after this?" Sirius said with a laugh although you could see from his face that it was a genuine concern.

"I don't know, Sirius." I said, "I guess we'll find out if you decide to tell him."